Episode 182: Buc-ee’s Midlife Crisis, Pickleball Bars, & Flip Phones Make a Comeback

[00:00:01] Hey everybody it's me Kathleen Madigan welcome to Madigans Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, let's talk about what's been going on. Welcome, welcome everybody. Episode 182 Stevie says hello and welcome. Stevie

[00:00:32] made it back from whatever was happening where they had to cancel shows and she was in Chicago with Billy Joel and did a fine job so. Well when your whole band's over 70 years old I'm sure you wake up in the morning and call like if I have

[00:00:48] comics on the road with me we're like hey who wants to go breakfast you know I'm sure their call is is everyone still alive? Is anyone sick? Does anyone need to go to the hospital? Does anybody need urgent care? Everybody be down at the

[00:01:01] front desk. Yeah it's welcome so first I need to address my medal and I came with a t-shirt this is it's enormous this is congratulating me from Bert Kreischer and Tom Segura for doing their 5k walk virtually I did it in Nashville. This

[00:01:20] medal is so heavy that this is why I know his wife she's much smarter than him Leanne yes we all know that Bert's smart in his own strange way but Leanne's really keeping this ship together. This is so heavy I can't imagine what it

[00:01:35] cost a male it's like it is like you could kill listen to that I mean you could kill someone with this medal and it's enormous and it's got a ribbon I mean this costs money. It came with a it said two bears 5k's you fucking did it

[00:01:50] congrats and thank you for joining us in the first ever two bears 5k we have dumb ideas sometimes and couldn't be happier how many of you joined us rock your shirts and finish your medals with pride until the next one Bert and Tom

[00:02:02] and I add Leanne to that because I'm sure she was the one that said Bert you have to get them something for doing it and then he's like what I was gonna do

[00:02:11] some of the Bert summer fun tour things I wanted to do the one on the Ozarks but I got to work so the fully loaded thing yeah it looks like a lot of fun yeah

[00:02:21] maybe next year I think he does it for like a month so congratulations to Bert and Tom and to Leanne thank you for the medal um and Stevie has one on too welcome I think Stevie can walk 5k no problem I think everybody behind me

[00:02:36] could even jelly roll did it if he could do it anybody can do it yeah what are we drinking face plant IPA it's a lost Rhino Brewing Company this was left by a

[00:02:47] termite in West Virginia a case of it yes and then I gave six of them to Michael Palasak and saved the rest for paddles and my and me which I brought home and she they wouldn't let her bring it in to to the casino because it's a

[00:03:06] casino so she I told her we'll run it back over the hotel and I'll grab it I want this person I don't know her name but I want you to know I did do that I

[00:03:14] did go back I didn't just say I would and then not do I'd go anywhere for a case of beer but I didn't even know it was a case of beer really I just knew it

[00:03:23] was something that you know I figured it's alcohol if this it's either alcohol or a live animal if the casino says you can't bring it so thank you for that and left latest potato chips which Michael Michael eats anything yeah a lot yeah

[00:03:38] and he doesn't gain weight I don't get it um and the gummy bears too he was like oh are these um I'm like those are mine you're gonna eat everything that gets brought I truly don't care half-time but uh he's just a mate it's amazing to

[00:03:52] watch I don't know younger guys just eat whatever all hours um yeah it was amazing um so that's what we're drinking what are we eating well we're gonna try some old UTS salt and vinegar potato chips from Montana termite Kathy she

[00:04:08] somebody came from Montana to DC that's right oh wow wow wow salt they're very vinegary they're good you just gotta be ready for it Wow yeah yeah how crazy is that to come to Montana the casino is in West Virginia

[00:04:31] but it's only an hour 10 outside of DC and when you drive the drive it's so pretty like 20 minutes outside of DC boom then you're in West Virginia and there's the Shenandoah River that John Devere sings about there must have been

[00:04:43] a thousand people floating it I was so jealous I'm like it was hot but if you're in the river it doesn't matter I was very very jealous so thank you for coming all the way from Montana um I've only been to Billings I've maybe I've

[00:04:58] been somewhere else in Montana I don't really remember Kalispell I've never been anywhere that look like the Yellowstone thing I know that I'm there are actual cities in Montana don't let that show fool you

[00:05:10] Fisher's popcorn Old Bay caramel popcorn now I don't know about this I love old but I don't know that you should mix it with caramel I think this is gonna be weird hard no I'm glad I'm tasting it there's Maryland termite Suzy and Kenny

[00:05:32] but I can't I love old bay just put old bay on the popcorn I put it on corn on the cob if you put it on corn on the cob oh my god and Virginia Diner peanuts

[00:05:45] these are from termite John small bash and extra crunchy I don't know small batch peanut people think of the weirdest word um yeah it's like a small batch peanut whatever that means yeah they're good yeah yeah I'll give those

[00:06:06] an A I don't know how hard our peanut is what Virginia Diner's famous I've never heard of it I'll take your word for it yeah you guys can go those are they're very good peanuts but I don't know tastes like a peanut I mean now see

[00:06:24] those I would dump old bay all over it and then shake them up in a bowl I'll try it later um all right where am I going next so you guys know we've added a second show in Boston at the Wilbur very exciting there's a Friday show on

[00:06:40] a Saturday show so some of her 15th and 16th and that means I get to stay in Boston for three nights cuz I'll get it on Thursday night so I'm there a chowder fest yeah some of my favorite bars and I just even sometimes it's cool

[00:06:55] to be there in the summer but I'll take November to less tourists yeah you can just pick around go wherever you want I never tired of it I never tired of their old cemeteries with all the famous people in a month I just I like Boston I

[00:07:08] love their accent cuz sometimes I feel like I don't know if they're about to punch me in the face like when I went down to get coffee at the lady goes I

[00:07:17] like your shit I was like whoa I'm not even awake yet I'm like I think that was a compliment yeah it was some sort of t-shirt I had on probably my ray gun pew

[00:07:27] pew pew everybody likes the catch you in the laser gun right it makes people smile and you know what else makes people three times on the flights this past week I have a little Bucky's keyring a stuffed Bucky it's like about two

[00:07:40] inches high and he hangs off my carry-on every single person who sees it smiles the guy who checked me in at Delta was like I went to my first one ever he has his big story about it then people boarding the plane because the bin was

[00:07:51] open saw it up there and they were like Oh Bucky's here I'm like that's right Bucky's in the house it just it's a wonderful thing so Boston I'll be coming November 15th at 16th so Friday Saturday and that's not to win a murder

[00:08:06] but more importantly this weekend Portland Maine there's a few tickets left kind of up in the balcony but every good seats it every seat is a good seat in there I swear to God I wouldn't just say that July 19 and 20 boy got the

[00:08:18] Atlantic City July 26 San Antonio July 27 Austin Texas I'll say it like Ron Austin yes you gotta do it like Texas Ron why Texas August 2nd Marietta Ohio August 3rd Cincinnati Ohio I'm coming for your skyline Chile Cincinnati watch

[00:08:40] out they're so proud of it August 10th Niagara Falls Ontario by the way congratulations to Edmonton for coming down from 0-3 but where are you people getting your gambling advice should have listened to this lady who told you

[00:08:58] Florida was gonna win it all this lady did I'm not even a professional sports person I'm just a lady who sits at a bar and watches shit I told you to bet on Boston for basketball winner of the whole shebang I told you bet on Florida

[00:09:11] Panthers winner whole shebang and then if you mix it with some golf bets boy that really contrives it confuses DraftKings they're like you want what I'm like I want Tom Kim in the top five and the Panthers to win what you can do it

[00:09:26] though August 24th Hampton Beach New Hampshire August 30th and 31st the Venetian Labor Day weekend yeah what are you guys doing on Labor Day weekend it'll be hot out there but who cares go to the pool or like me just stay inside

[00:09:42] the whole time a gamble some guy by the way some casino somewhere in Asia I know I got to look it up more he won four million dollars and he instantly had a heart attack and died what in the casino well I could see it happening you get

[00:09:58] too overstimulated I guess um September 6th Derrytown September 7th that's New York Wilmington Delaware September 13th Columbus Ohio that was one of my that was my second road week ever Columbus Ohio and I was in Philly the first week and I

[00:10:15] can say that some of the servers were a little aggressive and mean and I may have cried the entire way from Philly Bill Engvall kept telling me it's just it'll be fine and I'm like he's like there's just a few servers here who are

[00:10:29] having a lot of problems in their life I'm like I'm not even in the way I am out of the way but the club turned out to be great there in Philly it was just when you don't know what you're doing it's a little frightening second road

[00:10:40] week ever comes about September 14th Lexington Kentucky September 19th Oklahoma City Oklahoma can't wait to see where I'm gonna build that building September 21st Dallas Texas yeah September 27th Foxwoods casino in Connecticut September 28th New York City hello New York City people that always

[00:11:01] complain I don't come in the city well I'm coming town all October 11th Troy New York October 12th Burlington Vermont so there you go I love it when Lewis my little friend Lewis Black who's older than me I won't say about how many

[00:11:19] years but he sends me people that have like sold out Madison Square Garden and he just writes who is this today there's some youngster Sabrina who Sabrina Carpenter is that right I guess she opened for Tay Tay she's it's it's

[00:11:40] blowing up on Twitter because the kids can't get in and they've been in line one of them said they there and she took a screenshot of it she's 41,000 five hundred and fifth in line 41,000 people ahead of her I mean I don't know

[00:11:54] ticketmaster runs my stuff fine but I'm also not Sabrina I mean but Lou will just send this person is selling out and he's like who is this and then I have to

[00:12:04] go okay well here's a thing or this is a tick tocker or yeah I did not know though to be fair who's Sabrina no I did not know I'd want to she's one of the

[00:12:19] children and the children want to go but where are the children getting the money that's $300 for nosebleeds that's not counting fees she's 25 years old oh my how do you sustain that for the rest of your life she's dating a 31 year old

[00:12:38] avant-garde and a real Irish person he's in the band she's of in a share and in a share and being what one of the three Aran Islands okay so shout out to the West Virginia Club it was super fun it was a casino gig and then there's a

[00:12:57] racetrack that's attached and I realized I've never been here in summer I've only been there in the winter and I got to go watch the first race and then I had to go to work but then the guy who's running it down there this guy

[00:13:10] Mark he waited for me afterwards he goes did you really want to be a jockey I said yeah I did I said I used to go to Fairmont track with my dad when I was a

[00:13:18] kid I said and there was one jockey if you bet on him he always won he goes Dave Gaul he knew it I was like oh my god yes like me and my friends like a guy

[00:13:27] went when I was 18 19 22 I went my whole life to that racetrack for something to do just go and he's like well if you come next time I'll take you to meet all

[00:13:35] the horses because it was over by the time I was done I heard the bam bam bam you know the call the post call it was it was crazy I can't believe there's a casino and a racetrack it's just overwhelming you then they're like I'm

[00:13:47] like where do we park backstage well follow the stables take a ride at the next stables you just there it was it's a fantastic little place Hollywood Casino it's great then I accidentally walked down to the mall and I walked

[00:14:02] into a liver walk which I thought was ironic and really suitable I wanted to buy t-shirts for all my siblings for Christmas but you couldn't buy him he had to sign up to get in the walk I'm like well I can't commit I gotta go

[00:14:15] mama's gotta go do stuff but it was a it was yeah I'm gonna save your liver I posted a little video but then I don't want people to get mad think I know people get liver problems that aren't drinkers I'm just saying for the

[00:14:28] drinkers that do have the problems and I know quite a few of them you know I would have walked for all of us I texted all my cousins I'm like walking for everybody walking for the Madigan's and McHugh's of the devastators doing the

[00:14:42] work of the Lord accidentally walked probably half mile with them yeah I'm just like wow it's crowded for an 8 in the morning I was trying to beat the heat yeah don't why don't we stop and have a drink oh maybe not in this walk

[00:14:55] no no no no no we're not gonna do that so all right Queen King news well Taytay where's Taytay skinny Taytay was in England Buckingham Palace the guards played shake it up still like the bagpipes better but it was cute it was

[00:15:13] a good attempt her show was a big smashing hit Harry was invited Prince I mean Prince William was invited Harry and Meghan nay nay if you take Billy Bob William you can't take I'm sure that'll drive her crazy and the children

[00:15:31] Charlotte and whatever the other two are named Tom Cruise was there he had he got a friendship with and Taytay and Taytay brought Travis out on stage now I said last week I don't like the boyfriends getting on stage it's different he just

[00:15:46] carried around he doesn't want to be a singer he doesn't want to share her limelight she and she got all excited so you know am I drafting Travis probably not he's getting old you take them I'll have little Jack take him he likes the

[00:16:06] Chiefs he likes everybody involved no I'd rather have one of the 49er guys I can't think I'd rather have George Kittle yes anyway that's to inside football talk for you people who aren't following Travis looked very good in a

[00:16:20] tuxedo there was a video of Jason Kelsey the brother and he walked the whole length of the stadium with a beer in his mouth like his teeth were holding on to the cup because he had friendship bracelets and I'm like that's a drinker

[00:16:31] yes if you can do that they should have races like that that would be super fun but you have to jog and whoever has the most beer left in their cup at the end

[00:16:39] is a winner and you can't drink it you have to just hug yeah so Taytay had a very successful Stevie's fine Jelly's good Snoop I'm not sure what he's up to Tanya pictures state fairs whatever country people do Cher super quiet and

[00:16:56] that's never good and Dolly prop I'm sure she hasn't taken a week off we just haven't heard what new things she's going to be selling or whatever oh right I have the cast-iron skillet I'll show it to you next week oh my god it's

[00:17:12] so heavy um I don't even I don't really understand the difference I'm gonna have to google it lodge okay why do I need that what is it cook better I don't even cook all right we'll talk about next week and a congratulations by the way

[00:17:29] shout out to my friend Lewis black inside out to broke all the records and Lewis gets little bonuses so keep going to see it he gets Louis a king I have a lot I talked to him every day I can tell you exactly what he's doing this

[00:17:47] afternoon mm-hmm where is he eating that's the only thing he cares about but it's the only thing he's cared about his whole life he's a food guy it's just amazing like a bad lunch can wreck his day but a good roast beef sandwich can

[00:18:03] turn the whole ship around no matter how shitty things are like at work or there's problems and I go look what I found at the Deli Lube yeah oh wow this whole thing changes I'm like wow I've never cared that much about food another

[00:18:16] thing too I did a podcast with Pete Holmes and I love love love Pete Holmes and there's a story on there about me almost killing my mom 100% true she's still mad about that like it is not my fault right that the golf course had

[00:18:30] bald tires on cart and it just rained and you said go down the hill so I fucking did it and boom she flew into the forest anyway Pete's one of the smartest people

[00:18:38] and I don't mean that like you know are you smart smart way he can just talk about anything and he's funny and he's fun it's probably my favorite well I had

[00:18:48] a lot of fun ones this year so far that I've done I'm gonna do a bunch more in the fall everybody's kind of out on vacation now but Pete it's there's links

[00:18:56] to it on all my stuff if you want to go listen to that if you got an hour drive or something um there's well termites yeah what kind of pot did what podcast

[00:19:04] do you like who do you like who do you listen to I'll see if I can go do them they usually say yes um these are just a few funny things now that we've done

[00:19:13] king and queen I got nothing else on anybody so last week I talked about the power washer me using the wrong nozzle this person it's a dude Randy wrote I hired a power washer who used the wrong nozzle and power wash the face off one

[00:19:30] of my lions in the driveway how close were you to the lion sir but you got the wrong thing and you're oh my god that is just hilarious you probably probably drove home that night and the headlights hit it went fuck it doesn't have a face

[00:19:46] no more this I think this was a lady I don't know DJ s this person I'm here to get tips on how to get to the middle and enjoy your life spent an afternoon with the cousin's husband was always talking about how many deals he'd make

[00:20:01] and for the amount of money he was making and how good he is at hustling he took calls every five minutes he thinks he's impressing us I think I'm sitting here enjoying doing nothing and nobody's bothering me with calls I can tell you

[00:20:11] who I think's more successful that's right cut in 10 my TED talk how to get to the middle and enjoy it that's right I'm gonna come up with a better title so there's good merch but that's a that's the working title right now and then one

[00:20:26] more thing cuz this is crazy but trying to have a baby for years went to your show in Reno last September for my birthday I might add and what do you know flash forward I have a beautiful three week old daughter I'm sick as fuck so

[00:20:40] what can I say seem like perfect time I did the thank you for the opportunity to create my daughter perhaps you're some sort of fertility idol no probably not but at any rate the show is amazing I'm enjoying watching your stand-up

[00:20:53] while super sick tonight be well Emily and P has I'd attached a photo I would have attached a photo of said cute baby but I don't want you to think I'm some Nigerian Prince Prince nobody opens sketchy attachments no I would not have

[00:21:07] I did open the Pope's and that was real that was real by the way the man the person who set all that up for me I did track down to say thank you and that was

[00:21:20] all real like yeah it's just amazing people can be really good and social media isn't all bad that's what I'm saying I've met a ton of people from Twitter Instagram I pull them out of the crowd sometimes and just go come on

[00:21:34] back if they look normal and I love it cuz each wherever I pick them from they represent the genre without knowing it like the Facebook people usually older talk a lot and that's okay that's okay if I don't have to go to where I can

[00:21:49] talk a lot Instagram kids they just want a picture and they leave they don't even care about talking Twitter people so I'm very smart and short to say in there out yep that's it they don't even want the picture I'm like I thought you guys I

[00:22:01] mean I'm not gonna force a picture of me in your phone but okay it's just funny how they and I don't know about the tick-tock people I don't know that I've they're not like a yeah they scroll they look at me for 10 seconds ago bored

[00:22:15] bored bored okay so update the children the children I wish I can have a meeting with these people like there's very few times in life where I go no I'll be in charge of that meeting because normally I don't want me in charge of anything

[00:22:39] like I just I'll attend the meeting but I don't really I'm not gonna talk at the meeting I don't want the climate protester children they two incidents this one again security get a load of this one they target UK United Kingdom

[00:22:56] airfield hosting Taylor Swift's private jet to environmental activists spray painted several jets I mean Christ it cost you know a grand to get your car repainted I mean I don't know is that right I only have my car repainted one

[00:23:11] and insurance had paid for it because accidents I don't know but imagine having to repaint a jet I mean I can't even they it was parked at Stan said Airport in Sussex England in Essex sorry Essex England on Thursday just hours

[00:23:25] after her jet arrived they don't know that hers got hit how much to repaint a jet I'm gonna say I'm gonna say $125,000 see look at me 70 to 180 thousand standard standard 48 weeks well this airfield so this this these were the

[00:23:51] just stop oil people okay I don't say what they said I'm not because I don't agree with the tactics I agree with some of their causes I agree with that they're right I mean look the weather is I think it's too late now remember I

[00:24:04] flunked science whenever you hear whatever you hear things like that just go oh right that lady flunked science because it doesn't mean it's true of just a lady with a beer at the bar saying what I think I don't know if it's

[00:24:22] there's dams collapsing in Minnesota the flooding in Iowa the heat that's I know everybody goes oh it's been hot before not like in June like this this is like at least for the Midwest this should be or even the south this should be more

[00:24:35] end of July August yeah 90 not a hundred six like what the actual I don't know maybe it's not too late but anyway so I kind of you know I understand but okay

[00:24:50] this is my thing I'm not gonna get into it but if we're gonna stop oil what are we gonna use electric and then there's issues with that and the but but but

[00:24:59] but and then even if we all do it is China gonna do it no is India gonna do it no so they got the most people I don't know it's their tactics I I try to do my

[00:25:13] part especially when my friend Amy comes and redoes my entire house against my will and I have to remind her Amy I live somewhere else 250 nights a year on the road in hotels if you're pissed at me if you don't like my setup you should

[00:25:27] actually go to a Marriott because that's where I stay with my gay grandparents those two men that are by the elevator and I love a Marriott I love a courtyard I love a JW I love the entire chain you know talk to them about plastic I or

[00:25:42] what what are their dryers set on I support a lot of aluminum look at all the beer I drink out of aluminum cans well that's probably bad too but I recycle it which is hard here cuz in Nashville where I'm at out in the woods

[00:25:57] kind of you know the lady's like I can bring you second trash can but it's all gonna go same place I was like oh you don't have recycling not with us honey you'd have to take it to a special facility I'm like okay I mean you know

[00:26:13] there's only so much you can do but anyway yeah I try whatever Amy teaches me little things that I'll go okay I'll do that and I won't do that I'm not washing dishes in dirty dishwater not especially when I have a goddamn

[00:26:26] dishwasher Amy how many times you think I use that in a month twice I don't know how to use the dishwasher not really wait when it beeps and shit I have died just let it go I don't know anyway they took fire extinguishers filled with

[00:26:45] orange paint they cut through a fence with fence cutters and got on to the private airfield now in my life I've flown a private jet maybe three times Ron one with Ron what's with Ron no twice with Ron maybe five times Leno

[00:27:03] gave me a ride home one time from Vegas which was very nice and then I have friends that have one well they rent but whatever now every time I've gone there I assume this is super security I'm guessing because these people they're

[00:27:20] rich and famous and whatever you could tell me at a private airport these kids well they're very young one guy's not one guy looks like a really pop for it maybe that's their dad cut through with wire cutters and went out onto a tarmac a

[00:27:38] tarmac with you know fire extinguishers filled with paint again where is security I mean I'm not not blaming the people that did that that's just vandalism but they don't know if hers was hit and then yeah they cut into the fence I mean

[00:27:58] they're mad we're living in two worlds and it's true one more billionaires live in luxury and able to fly private jets while the other well unlivable conditions are being imposed on countless millions billionaires are not untouchable climate

[00:28:10] breakdown effects everything well yeah but this isn't how to do it this is what we need to have a meeting and it's called using humor to get your way TED talk number two stop being vandals and then so you guys know I like golf I

[00:28:29] had the golf tournament on Sunday and on the 18th hole and Scotty Shuffler was gonna win again but he had a putt left these children it's a mob of climate protesters stormed the 18th green at the Travelers tournament this past weekend

[00:28:44] so everybody's standing there Scott he's got one putt to win it then we're all done we're wrapped up and these kids I watched it live yeah cuz I was like whoa what and then they started spray-painting the green for everybody to

[00:28:54] I mean I'm sure that's fixable you wash it off but this group um was no golf on a dead planet I forget what group there oh they're oh they're just stop oil as well oh my gosh but you know and and one of the golfers

[00:29:17] got tackled by accident that I will say the police security reacted super fast but how did these kids get in here with goddamn spray paint I can't I mean I don't know I know what the if you I've only been to the practice rounds at the

[00:29:31] Masters you can get tickets on stuff up for like 400 bucks for Monday if you ever want to go you can do that you can enter the lottery my dad won people do actually win that um but the Masters like you have to go through security

[00:29:43] metal detectors no phones what is got is going on I mean backpacks filled with shit I don't know it's dangerous what if one of these kids wanted to do something crazier um it's just the children but the update on that is um the

[00:30:04] update oh the update on Stonehenge update sorry update so the children that's painted painted spray-painted Stonehenge they were reable we remove the powder from the stones and thankfully there appears to be no visible damage we move quickly as the powder could harm the rare lichens I

[00:30:23] don't like lichens and if the powder if the powder combined with water it could leave I don't know I've never heard of this word a lichen well I like it I like a lichen it could leave difficult to remove the streak so it could have

[00:30:43] been permanent I mean you can't all they're doing is making people not like them right and guess who's gonna come to your party if nobody likes you nobody that's right I don't know I see the weather and I'm just like I don't know

[00:30:58] can we get a handle or is it just the weather I don't know then I sit at the bar with my friend Mark who who only listens to Tucker Carlson sometimes we sit down I go Mark I can't hear from Tucker today I'll tomorrow I'll listen tomorrow right

[00:31:14] now I want to enjoy a pitcher of beer and chicken wings and tell me about your golf but he he he repeats all the time that this is just weather that what maybe maybe we didn't keep records 500 years ago but I don't know it just seems

[00:31:35] to be getting hotter and hotter and hotter and I think Minnesota is gonna be the new I have friends that have a cabin up there and they sent me the temperature last week it was 69 it was 96 here update Queen the band they've sold their

[00:31:53] catalog guess how much very much lots lots and lots yes don't Google it 1.27 billion billion yep it's the biggest acquisition of its kind earlier this year Sony paid 600 million for 50% of Michael Jackson's publishing and recorded master catalog company also purchased Bruce Freaksy Paul Simon yeah

[00:32:25] and then it gets into the details which is totally boring but yeah 1.27 billion and then you got to divide that between four people I suppose well Freddie whoever wrote it probably gets more one more update so I'm keeping an eye on the

[00:32:46] Iceland volcano doing the work of the Lord for all the termites who have jobs and are too busy for all this we now have to rush to block the lava from engulfing a power plant yeah it's Grindelwich the town where I still want

[00:33:04] to know where are all where did all the people go right where are they do we have any termites that are Icelandic the volcanic eruption in the Icelandic town of Grindelwich is ongoing with lava posing a threat to nearby infrastructure

[00:33:19] now urgent measures must be taken to prevent the lava lava from reaching the sparse Sengi power plant the latest eruption which began in May is the fifth in the area since December 2023 it's been marked by vigorous lava flows and

[00:33:34] some of the highest recorded in recent activity covering main roads and threatening the infrastructure of Grindelwich and surrounding areas if I trust anybody it's anybody in these countries whether it's Norway Sweden Finland Iceland to know what to do they're very organized I think they can

[00:33:53] figure it out they're kind of used to it um but on the other hand I don't this is crazy I never even heard of this magnet fishing you get a giant magnet on

[00:34:12] a rope and then you're hoping to find stuff in the lake or the creek or the whatever money doesn't grow on trees but for one New York couple it emerges from the filthy gunk at the bottom of a city pond James and Barbie yeah we're magnet

[00:34:29] fishing using a cable to toss a powerful magnet into a body of water when they hook something big they yanked up their haul and discovered their magnet had grabbed onto a safe with bundles of hundred-dollar bills inside inside the

[00:34:45] soggy but intact bills were a hundred thousand dollar fortune for the couple yeah we pulled it out we were seeing stacks of hundreds we freaked out they had found other old safe but they were to say is where they were typically

[00:34:56] empty or contained plastic bags and disintegrated remains of money they couldn't believe it they were freaked out we call it poor man's treasure hunting I would not think the money would last I think that the water would

[00:35:09] seep in somehow yeah they found also found World War two grenades an intact motorcycle foreign coins and jewelry yeah they if you'd like to watch them they have a YouTube channel called let's get magnetic oh god last month a magnet

[00:35:30] Fisher in New Orleans found a human skull that had been padlocked to an exercise dumbbell yeah maybe I don't want to do that I don't want to I don't want to no I'm good not never thought about pulling up bad shit no this is um

[00:35:45] this is a great holy shit they found it so these people had a pet donkey and it disappeared five years ago their pet and he's been spotted living with a herd of

[00:35:55] wild elk he's out living his best life yep when diesel the dog he ran away on a hike near his home outside Sacramento five years ago the owners assumed the worst he's not an aggressive he's not aggressive he's a lover but right now

[00:36:10] he's scared this was days after his escape years passed without a sign of life from diesel until earlier this year when a hunter spotted them and filmed a herd of at least a dozen elk in the northern California wilderness

[00:36:21] among them strangely was a wild burrow Drury is positive that the donkey in the hunters video is her diesel we finally saw him finally we know he's living his best life he's happy he's healthy and it was just a relief they

[00:36:35] adopted diesel from the Bureau of Land Management and he had lived on their ranch for the first few years of his life alongside chickens a llama and a miniature donkey my friend Andrea has a miniature donkey it's adorable it's

[00:36:46] adorable till it has diarrhea in the garage and then not so much on a fateful hike in 2019 diesel noticed something that spooked him and took off running dragging jury's husband Dave through the bushes behind him she told him for

[00:37:01] some time for weeks they searched for him to the rugged terrain though they spotted him once on a trail cam and found some tracks that may have matches they never found him and then this guy took a video she said I can't I can't

[00:37:13] get over it I'm amazed the donkey looks so happy and healthy that's a great little story yeah he's out there just having a life he was supposed to have yeah they're not gonna go get him she said nope you know let him go they're

[00:37:25] not gonna try and catch him and bring him back as donkeys in the wild can usually find plenty to eat and the donkey appears to be thriving in the wilderness with friends by his side he's truly a wild burrow now compared to the

[00:37:37] not so feral cats that let another cat come in this house today yeah I opened the door and to let in a choppo and kato wanted in for a while they like to

[00:37:50] come in for a little bit as long as I don't shut the door baby cattle stay in 24-7 she don't care no not feral no not anymore and then I I went in to go put

[00:38:03] in my contacts and came back out there's an orange and white cat yep just sitting there eating treats out of the Bigfoot dish I'm like wow they do nothing I think it's cuz they were outside so long when they were little

[00:38:16] they're just used to everything there's a raccoon that comes every day it eats it looks in then it gets a drink out of the water fountain even if I put the food away it comes for a drink which is fine and I don't want him to get in

[00:38:28] fights but they could do a little better guarding just say maybe not today right moving on to news people moving on to news I could not tell if it was feral or

[00:38:45] not the orange and white one I think it might have been a pet it was a little dirty though the white part was a little dirty which makes me think it's been in

[00:38:52] the woods a lot and then I had to chase one of these jackasses in the woods and I got chiggers everywhere if you've never had a chigger bite they never go away and I found a medicine though I'm gonna do a video it's called chigger X it

[00:39:04] worked great sure X yep there it's way worse than a tick bite do I read no I took it to the pharmacist I go use this work and he looked at me he goes I'd get the hydrocortisone also I'm like Oh judgey judgey judgey just read what's on

[00:39:22] it does it work they scarred too it takes forever for a trigger bite to go away a trigger and the thing is you can't really see them like a tick I

[00:39:33] don't know where I was I had in the woods Oh with my mom walking the dog and I had a tick on it came on the side of my ear damn there's still a huge bump yeah it's nasty anyway from research assistant Bob Reid unpaid intern Hooters

[00:39:52] is closing 300 restaurants no what will my friend Ron white do for lunch I am not a Hooters wing person no I like the traditional buffalo wings I don't like the way there's like mini fried chicken wings yeah I'm not in love with it the

[00:40:14] rest that's fine if you want to go in for salad fine but I don't really choose Hooters for beers fine but they've made the difficult decision to close a select number of underperforming stores one is by Bob's house the company did not

[00:40:31] release a list of affected locations or a specific number well you know what we could do that right here doing the work of the Lord Torrance do you have one that closed by you let me know where it's at and I'm

[00:40:40] gonna out these people for where they're closing oh yeah they say the brand remains highly resilient and relevant there's one about two miles from where I'm sitting and it's not usually that crowded no Waffle House is

[00:40:56] booming but Waffle House is smart only have four booths we look packed accounting for the closures Hooters has about 300 global locations and a 12% declines in 2018 menu prices blah blah blah doesn't matter there's more Miller ale houses

[00:41:17] and more Dave and Buster's they're building new ones I like a Miller's ale house on the road yep they have a great chicken sandwich FYI Dave and Buster's I don't even know that I've ever eaten there I've played

[00:41:29] crazy taxi I love that game and drank and it's a video game we drive a taxi but I need to pick people up you get to pick what your driver is and then you

[00:41:39] can pick people up or not if they look like drug dealers because some of them could shoot you right exactly news little Catholic news love it this is why he's my favorite Pope Pope Francis said priests should give short sermons so

[00:41:52] people don't fall asleep oh yeah that's right keep it tight yeah I mean I know if for everybody's gonna say something I know the Catholic Church has its issues we just acknowledge all that I'm just saying

[00:42:05] these are the things this is progress let's tighten it up open my night you get five minutes he's giving you eight he's being generous he gave you three more than an open mic spot and you go over eight I think there should be a red light

[00:42:18] and then we turn off your mic he said this Wednesday at the Vatican sometimes priests talk a lot you know no longer understand what they are saying the homily that's a speech so if you're not Catholic a you read something out of

[00:42:33] the Bible and then they give a speech on that little tiny speech but it used to shit I mean some of the people when I was a kid would go on for like an hour

[00:42:40] yeah and then my dad would be like we're fighting at a different church we're not doing that again and then we would drive an extra 20 minutes to a different church I'm like was that really a time saver dad we just drove 20 minutes one

[00:42:50] way we're gonna drive 20 minutes back we could have just walked down the homily a message delivered by the Catholic priest during the church service must be short an image a thought a feeling that's hard I never think about that when I'm

[00:43:09] doing my act is this a thought or a feel an image that's hard it should not last more than eight minutes because after that the attention is lost and people fall asleep and they are right said the Pope age 87

[00:43:22] Solomon von Bopp he's smiling while he says it too it's giving after reading from the Bible and used to reinforce religious teachings the Pope's words echo the recommendations made by Archbishop so-and-so in 2010 in his

[00:43:36] book the Word of God which prelates to keep their homilies to eight minutes or shorter and to avoid improv from the pulpit oh why can't you do a little improv if you thought of something say it what's that about yeah I don't ever

[00:43:52] feel like they wrote it I feel like it's all improv maybe there's that good at it um it's also in line with the shrinking American tension span which is causing leaders and other professions to issue advisories on how long that

[00:44:05] things should go on per CBS News the Associated Press has advised writers to keep most articles under 500 words the average shot in a movie now is under five seconds no but I noticed that because sometimes it gets too jumpy for

[00:44:20] me in a movie where I'm like slow the fuck down what do you why do we have to get a shot of his nostrils when we were on his whole body and he was talking I

[00:44:28] get it I don't like it but I don't know I'm not one of the five-second people I'm not one of the children I'm not well I'm gonna get my tick tock I'm gonna get my tick tock in shape yeah it's been neglected because I just have been busy

[00:44:42] but um I'm gonna get get it rolling rocking we'll have all my specials there I don't know there's like eight that could be chopped up for jokes and then you know I haven't done it but I do my I do my own Twitter for them well and

[00:44:57] sometimes if there's a graphic I didn't design that but I'm doing my own Twitter my own Instagram the facial book I have a little help with cuz I don't it's overwhelming to me well I don't love it but I do look at it I look at the email

[00:45:12] from this the podcast on the inbox and all that some of them are very funny um not all of them I can't I don't have time but I look at a lot um news flip phones are surging they're on the comeback as folks seek a connection

[00:45:32] without distraction now a long time ago a man who I may or may not be related to I won't say who who knew he was such a dirty little bird told me that a lot of

[00:45:47] his guy friends had flip phones in case they wanted to like have an affair because then they talk on that phone and there's no record of it on their real phones and they keep that phone in the glove compartment of the car you know I

[00:46:01] know I know people are busy busy dirty birds busy bitty but anyway flip phones are having a moment it's true people are snatching up the bit my friend Chuck always has a flip phone he always has well he likes it because it is true when

[00:46:17] you close the phone the conversations on off I mean for sure off how many times I can tell you I think I've turned off the phone and I haven't and then I thank God I haven't said anything shitty about somebody but if I had they'd have

[00:46:32] heard it um my parents no idea how to turn off a phone it's a conversation never hangs up it just I that's why they're all okay they're like why are our chargers aren't working no it's that your phones never off it couldn't keep

[00:46:45] up if we had 17 of the most brand-new chargers on the planet so when you shut the flip phone you know it's over right it's a guarantee versus that it's true people are snatching up the basic clamshell throwbacks of the early 2000s

[00:47:00] faster oh I think I still have to maybe I'll put them on the on the eBay that a bag of discounted Reese's didn't have that's not funny the reasons are simple we're burned out on smartphones social media and passively allowing our lives

[00:47:14] to melt away mindlessly stuck on screens I learn a lot on social media I get a lot of information that actually is in my life yes that matters a lot a lot of sports stuff speaking which I forgot to say if you'll notice Fred Bird

[00:47:33] the Cardinal mascot is sneaking out because we're in second place albeit our division's terrible second the Brewers and my friend Dax is a Cubbies person and they have gone from second to last now that's gonna change all summer and I

[00:47:49] am NOT thinking the Cardinals are gonna be spectacular I don't like that I don't like the owner I don't like the manager I think it's all bullshit not a happy fan but because the players themselves have done a good job I'm moving for a

[00:48:01] burrito anyway according to late statistics the average person spends five hours a day on their smartphone I don't think so which equals six days a month and a mind-boggling 12 years over a lifetime yeah but you know like in the

[00:48:22] morning I get up and do the phone why is that any different than the newspaper that I used to read right like on the road you're right yeah I'm we're not

[00:48:31] wasting all that paper so in the row on the road back in the day I would go down and get the local paper say the Omaha World-Herald and USA Today and get my coffee and I would read why is it any different than me reading on the phone

[00:48:45] right now I don't think that you're still just reading news you see I mean I don't know what the rest of the day people are doing but I know at least us old people or you know I'm on Instagram or looking when Cindy Lauper coming that

[00:48:58] you know things that fucking matter she's on the road I want to see her I've never seen her well she on tour that much I want to see her and Annie Lennox well together apart I don't care whatever they want to do yeah yeah well

[00:49:16] our human willpower and band-aid fixes like built-in social media app limits don't help if you took an alcoholic who had a problem with alcohol and couldn't control it then said the best thing to do is get the alcohol alcohol out of the

[00:49:27] house right so that's how I sort of looked at it this guy said we'll probably from his home he he created and co-owns the popular restaurant software thing I don't care and he replaced his iPhone with a Verizon flip phone four years ago

[00:49:45] and he says he does not miss it at all boy I get yelled at for having an Android what if I was had a flip what if I could text from a flip to the family

[00:49:54] thread that would just really really get me deeper and shit who has a goddamn flip phone it wouldn't be green no it would just be numbers wouldn't even make any sense I didn't like who I was when I had an iPhone I wasn't present

[00:50:12] with other people I was constantly checking email text sitting at a stoplight looking at my phone constantly grabbing the phone being distracted and being distracted while I was with my wife and kids now having just a flip

[00:50:21] phone has a mental it's a mental health boon for me he said the small inconveniences are so enormously outweighed by the positive outcomes just from my presence mental health my anxiety all that's promote improved dramatically well maybe you had a problem I don't feel like when I'm with

[00:50:41] other people I turn my my phone ain't even on unless you know my parents are you know sick or you know if I have to like in cases of emergency but I don't sit there while people are talking and check my phone that's rude yeah sales of

[00:50:57] simple flip phone features not the snazzy galaxy flip 5 are up for the second year I and the Samsung Galaxy flip 5 I don't know I have to go look at it I might get it I don't know I don't like going to this rent store or T

[00:51:18] mobile whatever it's called now the children are so helpful there are two of the actual children zoomers they're like in their 20s and they just look at me like I'm their mom and I just act dumber than I even am which is really

[00:51:31] stupid but about tech stuff I don't know anything and I'm like can you just make everything in this phone go to that phone do not send me home to go to some fucking app I'll never do it I won't do it right then I'll lose every video and

[00:51:42] picture I have they do it they're like okay so can you go get lunch or something to come back I'm like absolutely I'm gonna go get yeah this one girl well she's an influencer too but she own oh she takes

[00:52:03] it out because it makes her more present but it also eliminates drunk text and bad hookups all of the bad things about college all the good things about a flip phone which is connected with people and taking videos and photos I

[00:52:16] will say well because to text on a flip phone remember when you could yeah a it's a lot our drunk won't go through all that yeah I don't think a drunk person would have the wherewithal I wouldn't yeah so is that oh here's a

[00:52:39] picture of I've seen this one flip I don't know got to think about it well yeah it looks better than the old ones used to but I'll go look at it and I'm gonna go to the Cracker Barrel by my house that claims it's remodeled I'm

[00:52:55] gonna do the work of the Lord and I'm gonna go get some pancakes and then um this is from research assistant Louis Black unpaid intern baseball stadium becomes the first to offer THC products for the fans well first ballparks

[00:53:15] offered hot dogs and pedestrian loggers the could then concessions boomed with all sorts of nibbles entrees and drinks highlighting local restaurants and craft beers now you can go to a ballpark and get high not every ballpark but you can

[00:53:27] at Walker Stadium in Oregon where the Portland Pickles play a minor league ball team the Portland Pickles I bet their merch is great the team announced this month that through a partnership with cycling frog a dispenser of hemp derived

[00:53:41] THC plus CBD products that it would sell seltzer seltzers with THC in it that's confusing the team said it's the first time a sports team is selling THC products at a live event what you know I don't know I don't care whatever right

[00:54:03] it's a Oregon if anybody's gonna do it it should be them the Portland Pickles have a responsibility in the sports industry to take leaps and set precedents of innovative partnerships as we saw in 2019 becoming the first team

[00:54:15] ever to partner with a CBD company and quickly turn teams all the way up with major league across sports follow suit yeah speaking of which did you guys go watch Renee did you watch the documentary here's the things I'm

[00:54:30] excited about to I mean I know I'm skipping back a little bit I cannot wait to watch this leading on documentary there's part of her that is so off putting to me because everything's so dramatic but there's also part of her

[00:54:42] that I'm fascinated with because she is that person like and I believe her I believe she's sincere I kind of can't wait and then for narcissism you've heard well she's had rough road her husband died her mom died everybody's

[00:55:00] dying predated that mm-hmm would you be saying this because you're from the west of Canada and maybe don't care for the middle Quebec is that because you were forced to learn French for just one tiny group of people is that why I feel

[00:55:14] the hatred coming I think I do and I can't wait to watch PBS they have a new thing called the the new dig about Pompeii so I just meant to say those oh yeah all right now here's here's something would you go to this termites

[00:55:32] I tell you this would you go would you spend I think they said 50 bucks I saw a story online about it I just saw it on TV and that I saw it online Netflix is gonna open two massive venues with experiences shops themed to its shows

[00:55:45] now here's something was super cool if so member when Vikings was on on the history channels it's a discovery channel I think they were all they're all the same under the same house in New York they had a Vikings exhibit at the

[00:56:01] same time as Vikings was on I was first lady there in the morning yep buy my ticket 30 bucks whatever it was awesome but it was great because it's like interacting with what's on your mind right now if you're watching Vikings um

[00:56:16] but this one they're called an it's a Netflix house the first two locations which will include events and shops themed to its shows will be in Dallas at their Galleria I believe and the king of Prussia mall in Pennsylvania um you get

[00:56:34] to immerse yourself in the world's either your favorite shows the experimental complexes will include elaborate events with about in in a repurposing of empty retail space I'm telling you turning everyone turn every one of these malls

[00:56:47] into it at pickleball court and bars pick well around the pickleball pickle bars pickleball bars pickle bar bar bar ball right all people would say let's all especially all my friends would say let's play pickleball and have some wine

[00:57:07] they look would like to congratulate themselves for 42 minutes of fake exercise and then as I would and then go I deserve this they are gonna occupy these Netflix houses former department store locations at the Dallas gallery of

[00:57:23] a they'll spend a hundred thousand square feet they're set to open in 2025 for fans of say squid game the dark drama and reality reality show Netflix promises to recreate the program's glass bridge challenge you walk or jump across

[00:57:40] clear panels that shadow shatter and drop them if they stand on the wrong one no I'm not gonna do anything at this age it's gonna scare myself on purpose I don't know who it's for but like what other shows Briggerton Bridgerton I watch

[00:58:03] season one I that is stupid I can't well good for you pals you you you motor on and with your palm palm Royale season two I don't know I just don't I can't

[00:58:19] even think of any shows on Netflix that I would be like yeah I want to get in that show I want to be part of it um yeah that shows part of it the Queen's

[00:58:31] ball I don't know but I heard on the thing it's not written on here it's like 50 bucks a ticket it's a lot what about the children they don't mom some of the children do I don't know how long you get to stay in um speaking speaking of

[00:58:49] shit I wouldn't do this is why like I don't know you just get to an age and this isn't recently this is probably a good 20 years now I just refused to go on rollercoaster I won't do anything that could cause my death unnecessarily

[00:59:06] because I know it's coming eventually we're all gonna die but do I need to speed it up by doing some jackassery no I don't but when you're young you don't think like that so I understand why people do it but at this age I won't do

[00:59:20] 28 people are trapped upside down on an amusement park ride rescued by the fire department in Oregon 28 people it went on for like a half hour I was just crying I was more happy I was alive a writer said after being taken off the

[00:59:34] thing yeah more than two dozen people recovering after theme park ride in Oregon left them hanging upside down for more than 20 minutes upside down on Friday June 14th 28 passengers were riding Portland's Oaks amusement park atmosphere but fears and all caps atmosphere the ride stopped in place

[00:59:56] suspending them all upside down in its apex position the ride operators working on atmosphere which can operate at either 180 degree or 300 degree setting as it sends its writers flipping through the air in a loop called 911 and be beginning initiating emergency procedure can you imagine the headache 20 minutes

[01:00:19] upside down all of the blood is rushing to your brain they arrived the firefighters are pretty quickly and got everybody off safely but this is like right you just got scared literally like to death you

[01:00:34] thought you were gonna die yeah no and you paid for that she said the one girl said she was afraid but more importantly her entire waist her entire waist below everything below her waist was asleep there's all the blood gone you have to

[01:00:59] hold your leg backs it was so hard it was so bad so there's like there's this like woman firefighter and she's so tiny and she's like oh I got you describing her rescue I'm like are you sure and she literally like picked me up and I was

[01:01:15] just overwhelmed and everything and I gave her like the biggest hug I just this is why I can't I can't even know and like my nieces and nephews at Six Flags or whatever they go ahead or ask if there's another adult here who wants to

[01:01:30] take you well I'm not doing it I'll get on the teacups there's a lot of shit I'll get on antique cars sure I want a log right love a log right log fume flume

[01:01:44] Doug Benson used to have the funniest joke I don't know if he still does it he's a comedian he's very funny the log ride it whatever say Six Flags or whatever

[01:01:53] he said he liked to get this is his joke not mine but he liked to get in a family log and he's the only one that's not part of the family and then at the end it

[01:02:06] always takes your picture of you coming down the thing and he said he particularly wanted to get in with the Asian families because they're the pictures meant so much to them like and they had their friends taking pictures

[01:02:14] and then he would behave like a moron in the back of their log and they'd be pointing at him and go you ruin a whole log just to think I'm gonna get in that log and

[01:02:30] ruin these people's family I know but it's funny I mean who knows if he really did it I believe he would here's something where you're like really are you guys really I'm gonna doubt this lady the woman's oldest with the world's

[01:02:44] oldest woman who claims she was born six months before the death of Queen Victoria celebrates her hundred and twenty fourth birthday it's believed she that they have to she claims claims the ladies a hundred twenty four I mean just

[01:02:58] believe her her name is Amantina or Santos de Virgem also known as Donna Giulio she was born on June 22nd night Julio Julia Donna Julia is what I read Donna Donna whoo she said to have been born on June 2nd 22nd 1900 which is

[01:03:22] really weird because I always look at rental car things and how old can you be yeah I believe it was Hertz it said 1904 and I that's my grandpa's birthday and I'm like wow so you'd let somebody that would be a hundred and twenty four right

[01:03:37] Wow she lives in Sierra Gaius in the state of Parana right a hundred twenty four her social worker says she doesn't have diabetes headaches or high blood pressure she doesn't take any medicine and she doesn't have gray hair she loves

[01:03:55] wearing earrings and bracelets they threw her a special party to celebrate the official date of her birth well where we get that right she's Brazilian although her age is recognized by the Brazilian government she's been denied a

[01:04:09] place in the Guinness World Book of Records because of a mix-up with a birth certificate can't you just put in there this lady's alive and we think she could be too right that's come on be nice put the lady in the book what do

[01:04:21] you do to shit yeah just put it yeah but asterisk by and say maybe you know she spent a significant chunk of her life on the streets she was adopted at the age of a hundred woman named Maria Edner de Alameda and then there's a picture

[01:04:40] of the lady um she kind of well she's very tiny she's a very tiny person no no but I mean not from like shrinking and stuff she started out like my height and now she's probably four two it's a tiny little hands tiny little hands oh here

[01:04:59] she is in a winter coat you can barely see her face she's got her hood up current world Book of Records they say the oldest person in America born is Spanish we know this because you listen to this podcast Maria Brannis Morial who

[01:05:13] turned 117 this lady's way older I believe her she spent a lot of her life on the streets that's all it says um it doesn't say and she's not in a nursing home or nothing she's active on social media frequently posting on Twitter um

[01:05:31] she said I'm surprised and grateful for well with the help of her daughter who's probably 90 yeah so there you go I believe her I just I can't believe people I know there's no you know but the thing is if you're gonna be this

[01:05:52] old there may not be proof maybe they didn't keep records in Brazil at that time of those people because this is crazy too well tell me what you think about this termites uh-huh so if you look on my Wikipedia it says I was born in

[01:06:08] Florissant Missouri which is also the Ferguson Florissant school district which is why I say I'm also from Ferguson but really I was born in Jennings Missouri but Florissant is what it kind of turned into so uh the Midwest restaurant is igniting conversation over its strict age policy

[01:06:26] termites tell me what you think on May 26 Bliss restaurant a recently opened Caribbean restaurant in Florissant Missouri announced a policy for its patronage and that has since gone viral around the internet the eatery which serves dishes like oxtail Oh Jolof rice and fried plantain revealed that its

[01:06:47] age restrictions for its entry are women must be over 30 30 or over and men must be 35 or older I like that they decided we are five years more socially well behaved than men they're like well the women are fine by 30 the guys well you

[01:07:04] know let's hang on till 35 yeah they're not you know it takes them a hot minute to learn how to behave and then it says as a black-owned business Bliss Caribbean restaurant is dedicated to providing North County with an upscale dining

[01:07:17] experience they wrote on Facebook and they're adding that the restriction ensures a grown and sexy atmosphere now here's the thing my one but I'll never forget so when my brother Pat and his wife Ellie they had little Pat he was

[01:07:34] probably at the most to he's in a high chair I know this and they were in Florida we were all down to see my mom and dad and they took they decided they were gonna go out on their own to have a I don't anniversary dinner or something

[01:07:47] but they had to take little Pat we said we I don't know why they ended up by themselves and I said how was dinner was it romantic for your anniversary he goes no Kathleen he goes little Pat he goes I mean I didn't mind so much but there

[01:08:02] was a couple not far from us really trying to have a romantic dinner and it's just not romantic when a fork that isn't yours flies through the air and lands on your table and I could just picture little Pat just like I mean

[01:08:17] there is a thing that kids can kind of make the atmosphere I think it's funny but if you're trying to have like he wants a grown and sexy atmosphere the restaurant list there's three reasons for his policy oh the one time the twins

[01:08:33] wait my sister's twins were they were like a year that we were again down seeing my parents in Florida and we all went out and they were really good babies but for whatever reason they were like nine months old both of her in high

[01:08:46] chairs when one would lose it the other one would lose it it was like a mirror effect and then it started with Claire and then Emily mimicked it and it just kept getting louder and louder and my brother-in-law Matt who's like a country

[01:08:58] guy like he was just like Katie we don't leave you guys stop that make him stop it's like Matt I kitched can't just make them stop they have clean diapers they've been fed they're just angry like he's a we be angry their minds don't

[01:09:15] even work like that we gotta get these babies out of here I said to Kate I because I was with him I couldn't stop laughing I thought it was so funny and I'm like well there it's funny to us and I understand it's not funny in other

[01:09:29] people we do need to figure out how to stop it make a stop at Katie you know it went on she's like let's just get the food to go I'm like great idea and it

[01:09:39] went on for a good I don't know five to ten minutes and in a restaurant that's kind of a lot there's other people trying to eat they don't need all this shit the restaurant lists three reasons for his policy it creates a mature and

[01:09:55] relaxed atmosphere for guests and the restriction allows staff to focus on quality and that the policy ensures our restaurant remains a premier destination for those seeking an upscale grooming dining experience this policy helps us make a sophisticated environment hold up our standards and support the

[01:10:10] sustainability of our unique ambience yeah I just love that they made it dirty but then there's other people that are mad about it but really is a kid gonna want oxtail I mean maybe you could go to 25 what's I don't know they've got a

[01:10:34] little bit of backlash but that's okay they're sticking to their code next time I go home I'll go there see what it's like I'll do the work of the Lord well I do like a plantain I've never had oxtail I can't judge it I haven't um

[01:10:48] somebody Twitter account it's always so funny some lady wrote grown folks only and no twerking on the tables I support it yep somebody wrote we need ten of these in California we don't we though need about four in Oakland alone lol love

[01:11:05] this cuz it's for a mature crowd but it makes you want to go out make it makes you want to go out again with it without the nonsense I wouldn't have minded if

[01:11:12] you said 40 and up oh wow let's make it let's keep going yeah a lot of people really like the idea I don't see anything wrong with it if it's your restaurant right you know sorry no kids this this thing oh by the way I think

[01:11:34] this is wonderful it's another reason I love the United States postal system I'll have seeing my neighbor Jeff tonight he'll tell me what's wrong with it he loves to tell me what's wrong with the post office and then I go have you ever

[01:11:44] as a male ever been lost Jeff no it hasn't even when I wished mail had gotten lost to me it didn't the longtime host of Jeopardy Alex Trebek is now honored with a US postal stamp answer who is eligible that's right he'll be he

[01:12:01] gets a forever stamp to celebrate his legacy and the show's 60 diamond anniversary the stamp says this naturalized US citizen cuz he's what Canadian this naturalized US citizen hosted the quiz show Jeopardy for 37 seasons underneath upside written upside down is the correct response who

[01:12:23] is Alex Trebek yeah good for him a little fun thing maybe next time I go to the post office and get yelled at by the post office ladies for not picking up my shit out of the post office box I'll buy some Alex Trebek stamps this I

[01:12:36] don't know how much taller people can get but this is nuts this is crazy Oliver Roo makes Zack Eddie these are basketball players look like Muggsy Bogues Muggsy was the shortest guy ever he was like 5'2 or some shit I don't

[01:12:53] know he was great I always rooted him on he was so so tiny but he made it to the pros and he was great an incoming Florida basketball freshman Oliver Roo has gone viral in recent days after internet sleuths discovered his bio page

[01:13:08] on the school's athletic website list him at a staggering 7 foot 9 there's videos of it online I'll put it in the schnotes I mean it literally looks like a tennis ball in his hand and then he just goes like that he just reaches over

[01:13:23] and puts it in a bucket it's it'd be like me walking around with tennis balls and just putting them in buckets there look I scored again well I scored again up I don't even know now there was that one really tall skinny guy Sean Bradley

[01:13:35] he was the Mormon guy and he went off to do his thing and he didn't ever beef up so he didn't really he did okay but he didn't turn into what they thought you can be tall if you're too skinny though you're gonna get you gotta get gotta

[01:13:48] beef him up even if you're that tall but I don't know now we're getting to the point where does it even matter if he beeps beefs up I mean if you're Wow he's from Montreal one of your favorite places yeah the height would make the

[01:14:05] Montreal native the tallest but college basketball player of all time passing up seven foot eight Florida Tech and Mountain State Center Paul Sturges he recently entered the Guinness World Book of Records in 2002 as a tallest living

[01:14:16] male teenager as a child he spent hours looking through his Guinness World Book of Records studying the tallest people and comparing himself to the record holder hmm that is something I never did with I mean he brought plenty of eyes to

[01:14:31] his height and his proudness just like other Giants before him yeah he is a giant I mean he's a giant perhaps the most recognized skyscraper is the late minute bowl who I did Conan O'Brien with one time I got my picture taken with him

[01:14:47] and I look two foot eight no he he was skinny he was seven foot six some say seven seven yep he was playing Division two in the 80s before the Wizards Lewis's team drafted him he doesn't really follow basketball cuz Baltimore like

[01:15:07] Washington did pro yeah cuz it he loves college University of North Carolina baby blue baby Michael Jordan went there all right okay he this guy's ready to go I mean wait till you see him seven foot nine he was six foot one as an

[01:15:33] eight-year-old go to your room smack he could just he could literally pat me on the head and then smack me yeah he joined the seven foot club it's yeah six foot eleventh and sixth grade joined the seven foot club before he entered

[01:15:54] seventh grade mm-hmm Wow he's kind of cute too yeah yeah sometimes when everybody gets that tall it starts looking weird yeah no he's cute all right yeah I almost think it's cheating but I got in an elevator once

[01:16:13] in Detroit I was going to the show and the door opened it was Kevin Durant yeah and I'm not the biggest pro following and but I know Kevin Durant and I was

[01:16:24] like hey man I mean he just he's so so so tall and he was like do you have plans tonight I said yeah I got to work I had a show with the whatever what's the

[01:16:35] theater can't think of it Royal Oak right well and he was like well I have some free tickets I thought oh my god he's trying to give away his comps and I'm like I was seriously would cut he was so nice I'm like dude I would

[01:16:50] seriously come but I really do have a job like he doesn't know what I do for a living I'm like I gotta clock it I got it I got a clock in by 530 and he

[01:16:59] was like okay I think he thought I was just like I don't want to go to basketball but I don't want to say that of course I would go any sport basically I would go but yeah he was extremely nice so sometimes you hear

[01:17:10] people dog-talking him and I'm like well I was a total stranger yep this is for we're gonna do this and then I got some thank-yous and then our quotes we move Bucky the beaver appears to be having a midlife crisis the 42 year old mascot

[01:17:31] just debuted a new slimmer looks and Texans are not loving it nobody wants a skinny beaver beavers are choppy they're supposed to be fast food mascots come in every shape size and personality but I like to see him with a little

[01:17:49] girth big boys belly isn't just his body type it's proof oh that's the big boy yeah and then he goes through all the other ones yeah reactions to the video because he's felt now um why did they do this to my beautiful boy oh my

[01:18:06] gosh beavers have been evolving in Texas for 15 million years and the North American beaver Bucky who's been evolving since 1982 they loved him so much last year that they named a fossil in his honor but they are not having

[01:18:22] this this person but there's a lot of Bucky's yeah why is it just the Texas one the one in Tennessee isn't any skinnier oh yeah here's reason I don't I I don't know what I would think I don't I don't they wear them mascot outfits the

[01:18:45] same they're changing the outfit oh the little bottom part where he looks guy he's got a kind of a little fat ass the bronze statues chubby oh I'm gonna have to look next time uh shout out thank yous are these coasters that say

[01:19:08] Madigan pubcats are awesome that's from Vicki Vicki with a why the peanuts we got that soap rock and some bath gel from Pennsylvania termite Lynn laser pointers for geese removal whoever heard of that I don't know I'm gonna try

[01:19:23] it there's an awful lot of them though I'm gonna have to get like eight of those if it works that's Charles on termites Cindy and Danielle and local local beer and some cat treats which is good cuz I was out of greenies when I

[01:19:35] returned they like temptations do though so that was fine I'm not gonna feed them until they start to stop letting other animals in this house that's from Jen and aunt Laurie and some cat toys from termite Melissa all right so let's do

[01:19:52] our little quotes thanks again to everybody who came out West Virginia Maine can't wait to see you guys I have Kelly McFarlane with me she's very very very funny do not be late to the show all my shows I always take pride in who I

[01:20:08] book to work with me and to open the show because they're all headliners in their own right and she's one of the ones that I I actually I always kind of stand side stage and listen but sometimes I I don't know I get more

[01:20:23] excited to listen for instance Kelly's just funny this is a dolly quote on songwriting during an interview for the Oprah magazine God's like a farmer he gets up throws out all these ideas like corn and I want to be the early bird I

[01:20:45] never thought about that are things happening in the morning no yeah every time they on the today show when they have a concert out there I'm like nope hey can you come down at 730 and do 10 minutes nope nope I do not care I am not

[01:21:05] getting up at 5 to put hair makeup no no there was a country singer on there this morning and I thought what time did you get out and Hoda and all those people are jacked up on 20 cups of coffee like oh my god this is uh huh

[01:21:29] this is on Twitter in 2014 she wrote Taytay wrote good memories can leave even more of a scar on your heart than the bad times deep thought I don't know well what see this is where I get to leave real logical what do you classify

[01:21:48] as a good memory and then why is it a good one if it's something that's gonna make you sad I would put it in the not good one unless it's like okay good but

[01:21:56] they died you still want those memories and they can make you sad and happy at the same time true that well here's another one this is on tumblr does that even exist anymore tumblr I never participated in the first place she

[01:22:16] said I've always said that the world is a different place for the heartbroken that moves on a different access at a different speed time skips backwards and forwards fleetingly the heartbroken might go through a thousand mic of

[01:22:28] micro emotions a day trying to figure out how to get through it yeah I'm so happy she's happy now good for the whole family good for everybody where's she going next where's Taytay oh Dublin oh and you know what I have a friend I

[01:22:58] won't say who who may have some inside information and I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing to say out loud I would not say it if I thought it was something I shouldn't um Taytay paid all the people that are working on that

[01:23:12] crew she paid for their spouses to come over for a week boom how nice is that and I don't know if I'm supposed to say that so if I wasn't I didn't say that

[01:23:22] how about that I didn't say shit about that but how I know that is a different set of circumstances and once again shout out to Bert Kreischer from my metal I'm wearing I'm gonna wear it at Christmas and see if anybody says

[01:23:35] anything just to watch my brother go why the fuck do you have a giant metal around you it's so heavy my neck actually hurts I've been around for what an hour plus and it's like yeah all right that's it we got a little fire and