[00:00:02] What you want, when you want it, where you want it. This is The MESH. Hey everybody, I'm Amy Chang, a nurse, a mom and a health coach, and this is Healthy AF, where honesty and humor and heart meet real talk about feeling good again, inside and out.
[00:00:23] We're cutting through the noise, dropping the guilt, and reminding you, getting healthy isn't about perfection. It's about choosing yourself. One loving decision at a time. Let's get into it. Hey everybody, and welcome to another episode of Healthy AF. My name is Amy Chang, and I'm a health coach here with Healthy Life Health and Wellness Coaching.
[00:00:45] For these first two weeks in August, we're going to talk about something that is such a handy tool that I have begun using and I have a lot of life experience not using. I'm sure you do too. It's called the Pause Button. What's the Pause Button? How do we use it? How do we know it's not procrastination?
[00:01:12] What about Full Steam Ahead? What about Go, Go, Go, Getting It Done? All of those things sound great, but actually the Pause Button has much more power than any of the grinding, go, go, go, bulldozing you'll ever do in your life. So get ready for these just two short podcasts here for your first couple of weeks in August, last weeks of the summer to hear about the power of the pause.
[00:01:41] We're going to start right here with a story straight out of my client coaching bank. I had a client reach out to me today, actually, and let me know that the plan we had created for her a week or so ago, she totally did not do that plan.
[00:02:03] Now, this is a plan that we took an entire hour to craft, explore, really look at, and she sent me a message today saying that she did not do that plan. And I'm delighted.
[00:02:20] Now, you might think that's a funny thing for me to say, but here's how that comes into play and how the pause is powerful in this client situation, which, by the way, happens all the time. Okay. Okay.
[00:02:37] She comes to session a week or so ago, and she's made a decision about doing something and sits down and says, well, I have to do blank. And right away, I could sense that she was really dreading doing this thing.
[00:03:05] And so I called her on it, as any good coach would, right? And said, yeah, it seems like you're dreading doing that. And I noticed in your language that you said you had to do that. So can we take a moment and explore right there? And she said yes.
[00:03:31] So how many of you can relate to having made a decision or a commitment, whether it's out of obligation or, you know, you just didn't take the time to think about it. You said yes. You are plugging ahead. But actually, you're just like my client. A little resentful. A little frantic. A little anxious. Lots of dread. Maybe a little bit of pissed off.
[00:04:00] Maybe a little bit of just put your, you know, head down and grind it out. Just hold your nose and swallow that pill. Yeah. It's a really yucky, powerless, icky feeling. And that's how she had showed up. And then she said, I have to do this. And so my job as a coach is to create a pause.
[00:04:30] And inside that pause is spaciousness. I want you to imagine you feel like you have to do something. There's no other way to do it. You're backed into a corner. My pediatrician always told my mama, if you back a kid into a corner, they're going to come out scratching. We all do that.
[00:05:00] When we feel like we're backed into a corner, there's no spaciousness there. There's only scratching to get out. When you think about the poor decisions you've made coming out of that corner, they don't always reflect what our commitments are or who we really want to be or what we really want to have in those relationships,
[00:05:26] whether it's the relationship with ourselves, relationship with our food, relationship with our exercise, our relationship with our family and friends. They're just getting me out of the corner. So when she came in to session and she was in the corner and she was, I have to, I hit a pause button and said, let's get spacious.
[00:05:50] What are the other ways that you maybe could accomplish what it is you want to accomplish? What do you really want to be and to have in your life that you think this decision that you have to do is accomplishing? Is there another way to get it?
[00:06:15] And we spent about 30 minutes really brainstorming all the different options that might work or even not work for her because we're creating space, all the other things that would be possible. And then she picked a couple that she thought might feel better than the dread she had over this other decision that she had made. And we went to work.
[00:06:45] We planned it all out. We practiced how she was going to accomplish it. We talked about what reminders she needed. Standard coaching, right? What reminders do you need? Is it a post-it note? Do you need to be inspired? You have my number. Feel free to lean in. This is a big change for you. And when we left the session, she was like, I'm so clear. Great.
[00:07:13] A week later, I get a text and it says, I didn't do what we planned out. And also, I feel really good about what I'm doing. And it was different than anything we had even talked about. We don't get to that spot without having some spaciousness to really look at all our options,
[00:07:42] to walk out of the corner that we've backed ourselves into, sit down, relax, think about who we might want to be, and then choose. See, without the space that she gave herself between the time we had our session and the time she was to put that action into place, you know, five days later, without really doing some work inside that space,
[00:08:12] she doesn't have space. She doesn't have choice. She doesn't have power. And likely, the decisions she makes coming out of that corner are scratching and ugly, and they actually don't get her where she wants to go. So, that's the power of the pause. Now, it's really easy to talk about, yeah, just pause, no big deal. It's really hard to put a pause into action.
[00:08:38] So, next week, we're going to talk about what it really looks like when we don't pause, how we might really feel while we're trying to pause, and how do you know a pause is a pause that's moving you forward and not a pause that is a procrastination hiding, if you will, or a kicking it down the road. So, jump back in. Enjoy your August. It's those last couple of weeks of vacation.
[00:09:08] We'll keep it short for this week, but I'll see you next week when we continue the pause on Healthy AF. Thanks for hanging out with me today on Healthy AF. I hope something you heard helps you take one small, kind step toward your healthiest self. If you love this episode, hit subscribe so you never miss a conversation.
[00:09:33] And if you want more support, head over to myhealthylife.coach to connect with me. Remember, you don't have to do it perfectly. You just have to start choosing you. See you next time. You've been listening to The Mesh, an online media network of shows and programs
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