[00:00:02] What you want when you want it, where you want it. This is the MESH.
[00:00:33] Hello, hello. Welcome to another episode of The Written Compass.
[00:00:38] Dr. Shayna V here. I'm so excited to talk today because I think this topic is one of the most powerful reasons why I do what I do
[00:00:48] Because I often don't know about you. Find myself stuck in life. It might be for a few hours.
[00:00:55] It might be for several days. And when this episode is being recorded, it has been a couple of weeks of
[00:01:03] feeling the stuck, the suck and the stuck. And one of the things that supports me is writing. And one of the things that I think is so powerful
[00:01:13] is when we use writing to get ourselves on stuck, whether that be unstuck in our writing process. If we have a goal and we're trying to move that forward
[00:01:23] or whether that is simply just for ourselves in life in general. And here's the reason why this is so powerful and I'm actually going to be
[00:01:32] drawing from and reading a little bit from my upcoming book, writing is not that hard. And a chapter that's called writing is personal because when we feel
[00:01:42] the separation between, I feel like a life often in society often tells us, you know, we need to compartmentalize work from play and personal from professional. And I just call a little bit of
[00:01:55] be asked on all of that. And I love to shake up the globe, swirl it all together and see what shakes out from that. And I think recognizing just how
[00:02:06] you're remembering how personal writing is, it is such it is literally your words coming from you out onto a page, whether that's your day book, your journal, a blog post, a social media post and email, a chapter, an article. That is you on the outside. And that is super personal. So we have often this idea and typically comes from school that we need to remove the personal from our writing.
[00:02:35] Right? And then why do we teach people that? The intention is that we want people to learn to, I think as we're growing up and educating in the education system. We want people to understand there are other ideas out there than just our own.
[00:02:51] And that is a lovely concept and it's very important. Yes, we don't live in a vacuum. There are lots of people out in the planet and lots of ideas and it is a great tool to be able to have empathy and compassion and
[00:03:04] understanding of other people's views and then use that to help guide your perspective and your view even if you disagree. Right? We can all acknowledge that that is an important life skill.
[00:03:17] But here's where it starts to get a little tricky, right? In many ways, you can tell me if you've experienced this leave a comment, tag me over on the Shayna underscore v on Instagram.
[00:03:30] In many ways, you were literally, you weren't allowed to be you. You had to kind of abide by some rules and tell me if you've heard this like don't include your opinion.
[00:03:40] Don't use the, don't use I, the personal pronoun I like the actual letter I like I think, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, just stick to the text or just stick to the research. No personal stories.
[00:03:53] So if you're raising your hand or nodding along as you listen to this and that was something you learned in school, it kind of makes sense that now, if you're a person that has to write in your daily goingsons, your personal life, your professional life.
[00:04:11] That, hmm, these are kind of competing voices because you're sitting here. I want to share my message. I want to share my story with others but you've got this, okay your brain goes well how do we know what do we know about writing and then it goes back to these stories of don't use don't be personal don't include your opinion and it's like wait a minute. How do we make sense of all of that?
[00:04:32] Again, like I said, they, those rules were had good intentions right by trying to provide some clear to do's and some clear what not to do's school systems feel like and other people might not just be school feel like they're helping students right.
[00:04:49] And in turn students feel help you felt like you had some support around what do I do when I sit down to write. However,
[00:04:57] when you are learning and discovering what writing is because the focus is on that getting it right and not getting it wrong, it makes sense that you've got this jumbled up mess happening right.
[00:05:11] Because here's the thing those rules, those supposed supportive things are actually kind of backwards in how communication works writing is literally an active bringing your internal thoughts to the outside for someone else to read and make meaning from.
[00:05:25] And nothing as I said, can get more personal than that right. So my idea here around how do we use writing to help us get unstuck is to honor this personal to honor that this is you right now right and when I start to say hey what if you just write about what is showing up people do a mixture of things.
[00:05:49] So let me give you an example. I was on a coach he called with a wonderful client and she is a fellow bodymind coach and she absolutely knows how to honor like what is showing up for her personally. She has no problem with that.
[00:06:01] And she was kind of your most her moment kind of in the shit as we might say in life and this is why I want to tell her story because it's a great example of being stuck. She felt like she wasn't getting anything done in regards to her writing and just also in life in general.
[00:06:16] She was like I can't focus, I can't find my path. She you know we dug a little bit deeper and she was just over and over like I just don't feel like I'm getting anything right. I feel like I'm making any progress on again anything for the book she was working on for her business for her life, et cetera, et cetera.
[00:06:35] So I kind of asked her some questions digging a little deeper. Is it okay? What does not getting anything done look like right now?
[00:06:43] And so she kind of paused and pondered for a little bit and she quickly named that she actually had after all been doing quite a bit. She had been taking care for for babies. She's been supporting her own clients and you know what like I gave her credit we kind of acknowledged like you're still alive right you've showed you've eaten you've gotten dressed.
[00:07:04] Sometimes we need to celebrate those tiny tiny things. So there's really something to be said for all of this and so when we kind of done deeper what she really meant was I was not writing words consistently to help me complete my book though she didn't actually say it that way right.
[00:07:21] So I really in order to get unstuck. I really want to talk about how we've got to bring the personal into our stuckness and I think writing is a tool to support us in that and so.
[00:07:37] We actually in this moment in this coaching moment is I said what if we just wrote about if you just wrote about what was showing up literally right now kind of called this reflective writing or meta writing and I said.
[00:07:50] I bet you can write some amazing stuff today and we agreed to do a 30 minute writing sprint together and the funny thing is as her book was about being vulnerability authentic.
[00:08:00] And she was totally in a very vulnerable authentic moment and she was feeling anxious she was you know not feeling herself all of things.
[00:08:12] And when we took that moment to honor and just write about what was showing up guess what she had a shift she was able to use writing to actually give her clarity it actually see where she needs to go next in her book she felt better so she was able to have a little more pepper step in her life.
[00:08:28] And it allowed her to move the needle just a little bit and get unstuck just in a slight one degree shift and the floodgates kind of went after that right it was kind of a snowball effect so how do we use writing how do we do this how do we use writing to support us right and help us get unstuck.
[00:08:49] And it's easy it's really easy to think that you can't write anything of quality if you're not feeling that I hear this a lot.
[00:08:56] I just have a hard time getting in my flow I'm not really feeling the words they're not coming easily today and I'm here to tell you that that is a powerful opportunity awaiting you.
[00:09:07] It's in these moments where you get to shift from you being the one supporting your book to actually letting the words support you and because of this your book gets written as well right.
[00:09:19] I get it you may be sitting here but like wait a minute if I'm a mess it can barely gather my thoughts like can barely function in society won't my writing be a mess as well.
[00:09:29] And if I am truthful and I totally will be yeah and that's okay.
[00:09:34] I'm just going to say that I'm just going to be a mess because sometimes just getting anywhere it's down no matter what the words are no matter where the words are going or not going whether they're going to see the light of day in your book or wherever you're putting your words are not it doesn't matter.
[00:09:46] Some of your best writing will come when you're not trying so hard to work on your book and just using writing as a tool to get unstuck to honor what is showing up right.
[00:09:58] So here are some ways I'm simple ways to let the personal support you and let the writing about the personal support you in getting unstuck.
[00:10:11] And the first thing I want to do is to do some writing sprints this does not matter how long it is but a writing sprint is literally when you set a timer give yourself a designated amount of time put your fingers to keys put your pen to paper the entire time.
[00:10:27] So what I'm going to do is up shows up I encourage you to scribble I encourage you to do to do to I encourage you to write I don't know what to write.
[00:10:34] So it's just a little bit of time and you're going to do that and then you're going to read it.
[00:10:44] I recommend being at least five minutes,
[00:10:46] but no more than about 30 to 45 minutes.
[00:10:49] But honestly, it doesn't really matter, right?
[00:10:52] They're meant to be short bursts of writing,
[00:10:54] not long swaths of time.
[00:10:56] And if your timer goes off,
[00:10:57] and you feel like you've got more to say,
[00:10:59] you're kind of in a zone,
[00:11:00] then you can keep going, right?
[00:11:02] And if you get to that timer and you're like,
[00:11:03] oh, thank God.
[00:11:05] If you want to chuck the pin across the room
[00:11:07] or slam the laptop shut, that's great too, right?
[00:11:11] And in fact, I shared earlier
[00:11:14] that I'm reading some of this from my book,
[00:11:17] upcoming book, Writing is Not That Hard.
[00:11:19] This is from a chapter about writing is personal.
[00:11:21] And just in doing the writing sprint
[00:11:23] of some of the things I just shared,
[00:11:25] I was about a 30 minute sprint
[00:11:26] and I had written about 837 one, words.
[00:11:29] So a small chunk of time can produce
[00:11:31] a lot of content and help you get unstuck,
[00:11:34] whatever that might need to be for you.
[00:11:37] The other thing is to personify the word.
[00:11:40] So do a writing sprint, and then you can also use these prompts
[00:11:42] that I'm going to share with you
[00:11:44] to kind of personify the words.
[00:11:45] Often we think we need to know the words
[00:11:47] before they emerge on the page.
[00:11:48] And instead, I want to flip it a little bit
[00:11:50] and try asking yourself these things
[00:11:52] and letting your words guide your writing.
[00:11:55] What needs to be written today?
[00:11:58] What are my words asking of me today?
[00:12:02] What do the words need to say?
[00:12:04] What ideas are asking to come forward?
[00:12:08] And you can take any variation of that.
[00:12:10] You can take it and let them inspire you
[00:12:12] to go in a different direction.
[00:12:14] And I'm asking kind of a similar question,
[00:12:17] just a little bit variety there.
[00:12:19] But in asking it in these slightly different ways,
[00:12:22] it might produce some really cool results.
[00:12:24] So take a moment, close your eyes, take some deep breaths,
[00:12:27] ask these questions, let it be a part of your sprint,
[00:12:29] or just respond to a question or two
[00:12:32] and see what wants to show up.
[00:12:34] And then finally, I'm going to share a tactic
[00:12:37] that I've shared before, but I'm going to make it
[00:12:39] in connection to this using writing to get unstuck
[00:12:43] is get a shitty first draft down.
[00:12:45] And Lamont, who I love, she's my keep it real writer woman.
[00:12:49] And I always draw inspiration from her.
[00:12:51] She writes about the concept of a shitty first draft.
[00:12:54] And this is part of her an excerpt from her book, Bird By Bird,
[00:12:57] some instructions on writing in life.
[00:13:00] And she says it like this.
[00:13:01] For me and most of the other writers I know, writing
[00:13:04] is not rap trist.
[00:13:05] In fact, the only way I can get anything written at all
[00:13:08] is to write really, really shitty first drafts.
[00:13:12] She goes on to explain that this is like the child's draft,
[00:13:15] where you let it all pour out and then let it romp
[00:13:18] all over the floor and knowing that no one is going
[00:13:19] to see it and that you can shape it later.
[00:13:22] So this is a little bit of a permission
[00:13:24] one waving to help you use writing to get unstuck
[00:13:27] to write the most terrible thing, right?
[00:13:29] The worst of possible letting whatever words
[00:13:32] you want to show up, show up, worrying about nothing but
[00:13:36] getting words down and using them as a tool
[00:13:39] to just move you in some way.
[00:13:42] Honor yourself, honor the personal that is showing up
[00:13:45] and just write and write like you.
[00:13:48] That's most important as well.
[00:13:51] So let me know what of today, what kind of inspiration,
[00:13:53] kind of hits your getting, as you think
[00:13:55] about using writing, honoring the personal
[00:13:58] and using it as a tool to get yourself unstuck.
[00:14:02] And I want to make sure you know that we have opened up
[00:14:04] our calendar if you got expired by this
[00:14:06] and you're wanting some more support, some more ideas,
[00:14:09] some more tips.
[00:14:10] We've opened up our calendar to take calls
[00:14:12] from our amazing listeners and support you
[00:14:15] in whatever your next writing steps may be,
[00:14:17] whether that's using writing as a tool for healing,
[00:14:20] whether that's joining a writing community of some sort,
[00:14:23] whether that's finally writing and publishing your book.
[00:14:25] We want to hear from you and support you
[00:14:27] in whatever those next steps are.
[00:14:29] So head to shainaheartman.com slash schedule,
[00:14:32] to schedule a call that is convenient for you.
[00:14:34] These are super fun calls.
[00:14:36] People get so many fun things from them.
[00:14:39] And most importantly, we support you
[00:14:41] in whatever your next steps are.
[00:14:42] So head to shainahartman.com slash schedule
[00:14:45] to get on our calendar today.
[00:14:47] Thank you so much for joining me and I'll see you next time.
[00:14:53] Thank you so much for listening to this episode
[00:14:55] of The Written Compass.
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[00:15:19] and share the writing love.
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[00:15:24] that message that's been burning inside of you
[00:15:27] for a long time and I want to talk to you,
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[00:15:41] is your next best step.
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