Episode 206: Santa Buc-ee Returns, The Problem With 3 Kids, & a Low-Speed Holiday Mule Chase

[00:00:08] Hey everybody, it's me, Kathleen Madigan. Welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, let's talk about what's been going on.

[00:00:29] Stevie Nicks little article to read. Yeah. Oh my gosh, so many things. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. This is a Christmas, well, this is the last episode before Christmas, that's why I have my Buc-ee's outfit on. And let me tell you what, if you wear this anywhere, it makes everyone happy. They love it. They love it. And I saw a kid in the airport in one, a teenager, a boy. Yeah.

[00:00:49] And I'm like, good for him. He just looked at his parents and went, fuck you, I'm wearing it. I'm sure there was a bit of a conversation about it. And he said, I don't care. Yeah, I wore it up to the liquor store. My favorite little liquor store, Neal's. You know, makes everybody happy. Yeah. Yeah. Although there were a lot of little Mexican construction workers gave me a lot of thumbs up on it. I think they enjoy Buc-ee's too. Episode 206. So many things, termites. So many things have happened. So many updates.

[00:01:19] So much news. Let's start with what am I drinking. This is wonderful. This came from the Parks Casino gig too. It's called Mad Elf. It's the Trogues Brewery, which is in Hershey, Pennsylvania, which is one of the greatest American cities ever. And an example of what philanthropy could be.

[00:01:35] Oh, yes. Milton Hershey created a whole town. But unlike Kohler, sorry, Wisconsin, he didn't treat them like working slaves. He treated them great. And to this day, they still have Hershey school buses up there. He's a wonderful. I went, saw his grave and everything. It was a wonderful trip.

[00:01:53] So a little Mad Elf. We're drinking and I'm drinking. So if you ever go to Gatlinburg, Tennessee, Old Smoky is probably the most famous moonshine distillery place up there.

[00:02:07] And it's a store and then there's tastings. It's super duper fun. But there's another one, Sugarlands, right down the street. It's all walkable, which had this flavor.

[00:02:15] And my other one didn't. It's eggnog, Appalachian sipping cream means meaning there's moonshine kind of in here.

[00:02:24] Egg o' nog. Oh, egg o' nog. Yep. Like it's like this morning breakfast.

[00:02:28] It's supposed to be breakfast in a jar. Yeah. And it is. I'm having some right now.

[00:02:33] But also with little nog in there. Little nog. Yeah. There's alcohol in here.

[00:02:37] So if you're not into that, that wouldn't just don't buy this. But if you are into this, it's wonderful.

[00:02:44] Just a wonderful product right out of Tennessee.

[00:02:50] And their distillery is super fun, too. They're both super fun.

[00:02:55] And you can do a tasting at one and then the other and they don't even know you did that.

[00:02:58] Yeah, they don't know. I'm just drinking $5 moonshine all up and down the street.

[00:03:02] All up and down the street. Martha and Snoop have joined us on.

[00:03:06] If you can't see, if you're not watching on the desk, I have Snoop Dogg in his Christmas outfit next to Martha in her Christmas outfit.

[00:03:13] Snoop on a stoop.

[00:03:13] Snoop on a stoop and Martha on a mantle.

[00:03:16] And they like each other a lot.

[00:03:18] Yeah.

[00:03:18] They both. I don't think Snoop's been to jail. She's been to jail and he hasn't. Good for him.

[00:03:23] Has he been? I don't think so.

[00:03:25] I don't think Snoop's ever been arrested.

[00:03:28] Not to my knowledge.

[00:03:29] If it was, it wasn't for something super bad.

[00:03:32] I've heard of it.

[00:03:33] It's the most Google thing.

[00:03:35] Probably no.

[00:03:36] Oh yeah. After high school.

[00:03:37] Oh, after high school.

[00:03:38] Yeah.

[00:03:39] And out of prison for several years.

[00:03:40] Oh, several years. Oh, okay.

[00:03:41] Well, they have something in common, except I don't think Martha went quite that long.

[00:03:45] Maybe a year for insider trading, which I think every rich person is doing every goddamn minute of the day.

[00:03:50] I'm not in the business of defending Martha Stewart, but come on.

[00:03:56] What is his IQ?

[00:03:57] What is his IQ is the second most Google. He's probably smart.

[00:04:01] 147. I don't even know what mine is.

[00:04:04] I don't think in the Midwest we were given those tests.

[00:04:06] Or maybe my parents never told me the answer.

[00:04:10] What is my IQ?

[00:04:12] No, the other Kathleen Madigan, the smart one will come up.

[00:04:16] She's a finance lady.

[00:04:18] She writes articles for Newsweek.

[00:04:19] It's unknown. Undetermined.

[00:04:21] Undetermined is a good way to put it.

[00:04:23] That's how I'd like it to read forever.

[00:04:25] Undetermined.

[00:04:26] She could get smarter.

[00:04:27] She could get dumber.

[00:04:28] She has potential.

[00:04:29] There's potential there.

[00:04:31] She likes to read.

[00:04:31] If it's, you know, true crime, she'll read it.

[00:04:34] All right.

[00:04:37] Shout out to my research assistants, Bob and Clark.

[00:04:40] Clark had a little medical thing going on, and he's just shining like a top.

[00:04:44] He's coming out great.

[00:04:45] And shout out, well, I won't say the other one, but.

[00:04:50] Okay, we're moving on.

[00:04:51] But shout out to Bob and Clark out there.

[00:04:53] And Clark, even after quite a little event, is still sending me articles for the podcast.

[00:04:59] Well done, Clark.

[00:05:00] Bob, you're slacking.

[00:05:02] Just because you're taking care of him doesn't mean you can't fucking read and send something.

[00:05:06] These are us holiday pretzels.

[00:05:08] They're shaped like, look, it's a Christmas tree.

[00:05:12] Now, here's the question.

[00:05:14] Do they taste the same as usual?

[00:05:16] Yes, they do.

[00:05:17] But so what?

[00:05:18] They're fun to have.

[00:05:19] Look.

[00:05:19] Oh, I don't know what that is.

[00:05:21] Somebody sent them.

[00:05:22] Is that a manger?

[00:05:23] Oh, it's a snowflake.

[00:05:25] Well, it's half a snowflake.

[00:05:27] If you drew that in Great Skull, you get an F.

[00:05:29] It's a pretzel.

[00:05:30] Well, I know it's a pretzel.

[00:05:32] I just want to see what shapes they have.

[00:05:33] Who sent them?

[00:05:35] A Garmy Patrick from New Jersey.

[00:05:37] Yes.

[00:05:38] Oh, here's a bell.

[00:05:39] See?

[00:05:40] That's recognizable.

[00:05:42] Christmas tree.

[00:05:43] I ate half that.

[00:05:44] I don't know what it was.

[00:05:45] They're fun.

[00:05:46] They'd be fun to have in a little.

[00:05:48] Matter of fact, I'm going to take them up to Missouri.

[00:05:51] Oh, good.

[00:05:51] Yeah.

[00:05:53] Unlike.

[00:05:54] Yeah.

[00:05:55] Are you going to make a cheese ball?

[00:05:56] I'm going to make a cheese ball.

[00:05:58] I'm going to make my mom's rye dip.

[00:06:00] Good.

[00:06:01] Yeah.

[00:06:01] All kinds of little things.

[00:06:03] We're going to try in honor of the Chiefs game this weekend, which I'll be attending.

[00:06:07] Nice.

[00:06:07] Yes.

[00:06:08] Little Joe's barbecue sauce.

[00:06:12] I don't have a cracker.

[00:06:13] I'll just lick it.

[00:06:14] I know what it tastes like.

[00:06:14] Here's a pretzel.

[00:06:16] It's Night of the Living Dead.

[00:06:18] It's very hot.

[00:06:21] This is what I do when I go to Joe's.

[00:06:23] They have them all on the table.

[00:06:25] I just mix them all up.

[00:06:26] Cool.

[00:06:27] You can't just do Night of the Living Dead.

[00:06:28] It's too much.

[00:06:29] It'll burn your face off.

[00:06:30] Oh, wow.

[00:06:31] Well, your mouth off.

[00:06:32] For sure.

[00:06:33] Oh, here's my eggnog.

[00:06:35] Look at that.

[00:06:36] Egg-o-nog.

[00:06:38] Whatever they want to call it.

[00:06:40] Mm-hmm.

[00:06:42] Moonshine in the day.

[00:06:43] Oh, so celebratory.

[00:06:46] Good.

[00:06:46] Good.

[00:06:47] Good.

[00:07:05] It's got the Y like the ranch.

[00:07:07] Yellowstone.

[00:07:08] It's Yellowstone.

[00:07:08] Now they have their own thing.

[00:07:10] Oh, my God.

[00:07:10] We're going to talk about the ending of that.

[00:07:12] Yeah.

[00:07:12] Mixed feelings on that.

[00:07:14] I get it.

[00:07:15] Oh, wow.

[00:07:17] Well, I'm not sure I'm the biggest Taylor Sheridan fan, but I love his wood-fired garlic seasoning

[00:07:24] and rub.

[00:07:25] Jesus.

[00:07:25] If you see this in your grocery store, get it.

[00:07:27] Yeah.

[00:07:27] Wood-fired garlic.

[00:07:29] Wow.

[00:07:29] I'm not usually a garlic person either, but it would.

[00:07:32] Yeah.

[00:07:33] Well done.

[00:07:35] Well done, Taylor, who kind of ruined the ending, but we'll talk about that in a hot minute.

[00:07:41] Mm-hmm.

[00:07:42] Upcoming shows.

[00:07:43] Are we ready?

[00:07:44] Omaha.

[00:07:45] Pretty much sold out.

[00:07:46] Thank you, Omaha-ians.

[00:07:47] That's how I say it.

[00:07:48] You released them.

[00:07:50] Oh, I released a bunch of tickets?

[00:07:52] Yeah.

[00:07:52] The marketing cops?

[00:07:53] Yeah.

[00:07:53] Okay.

[00:07:54] Well, you can go get them.

[00:07:55] They're there.

[00:07:56] If you're open, there's a lot of available seats in Cedar Falls, Iowa.

[00:08:03] January 18th.

[00:08:04] Well, we're creeping on it.

[00:08:05] We're creeping.

[00:08:06] There have been a lot of late buyers in Cedar Falls.

[00:08:09] January 23rd, Spokane, the casino.

[00:08:11] I think it's...

[00:08:12] I don't know what's left there.

[00:08:14] Not a ton.

[00:08:15] Scottsdale, Arizona.

[00:08:17] Standing Room only, but here's the thing.

[00:08:19] Marketing cops will be released later.

[00:08:21] Always look at the last minute, and Standing Room only is fine.

[00:08:24] It's only...

[00:08:25] The show's an hour and 40 minutes.

[00:08:27] And they're better because they're right next to the bar and the bathroom for us old people.

[00:08:32] Huntington, New York.

[00:08:33] We added a second show on January 31st.

[00:08:35] That's a 931.

[00:08:37] So you can go out to eat and then come to this show.

[00:08:39] See, I planned your whole night.

[00:08:40] February 1st, Red Bank, New Jersey.

[00:08:42] Yeehaw.

[00:08:44] 7th and 8th.

[00:08:45] Durham, we added a second show.

[00:08:46] Another show.

[00:08:47] Two nights there, though.

[00:08:49] Huntington is two in one night.

[00:08:51] Durham is two nights.

[00:08:53] February 7th and 8th.

[00:08:54] February 15th, Fort Myers.

[00:08:56] February 20th, Davenport, Iowa.

[00:08:59] February 21st and 22nd, Minnesota, because we added a second show at the casino at Mystic Lake.

[00:09:05] It's wonderful.

[00:09:05] We also added an early show in Charleston, South Carolina.

[00:09:09] Fun.

[00:09:09] Yeah.

[00:09:10] I love it there.

[00:09:11] I might come.

[00:09:12] And then you're welcome to come.

[00:09:14] It's so fun.

[00:09:15] It's day before my birthday.

[00:09:16] He gets some char grilled oysters.

[00:09:19] February 21st and 22nd.

[00:09:21] That's it.

[00:09:21] That's Minnesota.

[00:09:22] Then the rest are all on the podcast.

[00:09:24] I mean, on my website.

[00:09:26] Website.

[00:09:27] That's what I meant.

[00:09:28] It's the moonshine talking.

[00:09:29] Okay.

[00:09:31] Now, one of our retired queens, just because she doesn't do a lot, which I appreciate.

[00:09:35] That would be my MO, especially if I was who?

[00:09:39] Shaka.

[00:09:40] Yeah.

[00:09:40] Shaka.

[00:09:40] Can you hear me?

[00:09:42] Shaka Khan.

[00:09:42] Shaka Khan.

[00:09:43] Shaka Khan.

[00:09:44] Shaka has moved to Georgia.

[00:09:46] What?

[00:09:47] Yep.

[00:09:47] Fantastic.

[00:09:48] But this is a termite sent this to me, and now I feel bad.

[00:09:54] Whoever did.

[00:09:54] Thank you.

[00:09:56] There's a Rolling Stone interview with her.

[00:09:59] It says, what has moving to Georgia meant to you?

[00:10:03] It means everything because I got peace of mind.

[00:10:05] Let me just say for the record, too.

[00:10:06] Shaka Khan, I may have already said this a long time ago, was on Larry King one time,

[00:10:10] and I loved everything she said because she said she didn't like California because it

[00:10:14] makes a person crazy, which I 100% agree with because there's no seasons.

[00:10:17] And then she went on this tirade about why you have to have seasons.

[00:10:21] Every word, I completely agreed.

[00:10:23] Cool.

[00:10:23] And she became my new spirit animal.

[00:10:27] She says, it means everything because I got peace of mind.

[00:10:29] I'm looking for Bigfoot.

[00:10:31] What?

[00:10:31] What?

[00:10:31] I'm looking for Sasquatch because I am surrounded by this forest, and it's just beautiful.

[00:10:36] I got a lake right here.

[00:10:38] I'm looking at a lake in the forest every day.

[00:10:40] I go outside and breathe pure oxygen.

[00:10:42] I'm drinking tap water from my well.

[00:10:44] I'm getting ready to plant this summer.

[00:10:45] I'm going to grow my own vegetables and grow my own herbs.

[00:10:47] And I'm looking forward to that.

[00:10:48] And then I plan to get a couple of horses, and I plan to live a life, a real life.

[00:10:54] Good for you.

[00:10:56] Looking for Bigfoot.

[00:10:57] She believes.

[00:10:58] I like that she's not looking for Bigfoot.

[00:11:00] No.

[00:11:02] Fuck the deer.

[00:11:03] The deer are here every day.

[00:11:04] There's one over here.

[00:11:05] He's only got one antler left.

[00:11:06] I'm like, oh, sad clown.

[00:11:09] He looks sad, too.

[00:11:11] Like, shit.

[00:11:11] Either have them or don't.

[00:11:12] But just the one, you look like a loser who one fell off and the other one's still there.

[00:11:18] Yeah.

[00:11:19] He's a beefy thing, though.

[00:11:21] Most of the girls are so skinny.

[00:11:23] I will not feed them.

[00:11:24] I'm not getting started.

[00:11:25] I'm not going to be those people.

[00:11:26] But you're tempted to.

[00:11:28] Let me tell you that.

[00:11:31] Tay Tay.

[00:11:32] Queen News.

[00:11:33] Went to Kansas City Children's Hospital.

[00:11:36] Visited with all the kids.

[00:11:38] She was awesome.

[00:11:39] Yeah.

[00:11:39] It was just very nice.

[00:11:41] Kansas City should be so proud of themselves.

[00:11:44] You've got great barbecue, and you have corralled Taylor Swift to your city, and she likes it.

[00:11:48] She's there a lot.

[00:11:50] She could be in Nashville.

[00:11:51] She could be anywhere.

[00:11:54] What am I going to do in Kansas City?

[00:11:55] Well, I'm going to go.

[00:11:57] My sister's coming with the kids.

[00:11:58] And my friend Jim, who I used to bus tables with at Stuart Anderson's Black Angus Cattle Company.

[00:12:04] We worked there from the time we were 15.

[00:12:07] We lied.

[00:12:08] Said we were 16.

[00:12:09] Till 2001?

[00:12:11] Or 22?

[00:12:12] Yeah.

[00:12:13] So I'm always happy to see Jim and his wife.

[00:12:17] I'm going to try to go to the Hallmark Village.

[00:12:20] That Hallmark is based in Kansas City, and they have created, I would, I think it's going

[00:12:25] to be like the Boston Christmas Market.

[00:12:27] But that one was so good.

[00:12:29] I don't know if you can top it.

[00:12:30] But if anybody can, it's Hallmark.

[00:12:33] And Lamar Hunt is not afraid to spend a nickel.

[00:12:36] He'll spend all the nickels.

[00:12:37] Just boom, make it rain right there.

[00:12:39] Make it rain.

[00:12:39] Union Station in Kansas City is beautiful.

[00:12:41] I'm going to go to that.

[00:12:42] But my sister ran it by the kids.

[00:12:44] And they were like, oh, why?

[00:12:47] That's what Jack said.

[00:12:49] Why?

[00:12:50] Well, Jack's not into art or decorations or nothing like that.

[00:12:53] He won't care.

[00:12:54] He's a 12-year-old boy.

[00:12:54] He's not going to give.

[00:12:55] He's not going to give.

[00:12:56] He's glad he's going to the Chiefs game.

[00:12:58] Or 13.

[00:12:58] I don't remember how old these people are.

[00:13:00] 14.

[00:13:01] Oh, shit.

[00:13:02] Okay.

[00:13:03] Well, 14.

[00:13:04] He definitely doesn't care then.

[00:13:06] And the Chiefs game is at noon, so we got to get to the parking lot by like nine.

[00:13:11] Right.

[00:13:11] And then start drinking.

[00:13:12] And my sister's doing tailspins about, what am I supposed to drink?

[00:13:16] The breakfast drinks.

[00:13:16] And like Matt said, Katie, you're overthinking this.

[00:13:18] We're just going to start drinking beer.

[00:13:20] We're going to have a bratwurst and we're going to the stadium.

[00:13:22] That's the end of it.

[00:13:22] Done.

[00:13:23] I'm like, I'm kind of with Matt.

[00:13:24] I like it.

[00:13:25] I mean, I'll take some Bailey's if you got it and a cup of coffee.

[00:13:28] Yeah.

[00:13:28] Maybe a mimosa, but it's going to be cold.

[00:13:31] You can't make sure.

[00:13:34] Champagne catches up to you.

[00:13:35] It's weird.

[00:13:36] Yeah.

[00:13:37] Yeah.

[00:13:37] I mean, I'll do it on New Year's Eve, but that's, and maybe go get some barbecue.

[00:13:43] And there's some pop-up bars around town in Kansas City.

[00:13:46] Oh.

[00:13:46] Mm-hmm.

[00:13:47] I love pop-up bars.

[00:13:49] Pop-up bars now require reservations, though.

[00:13:51] And then once you get my sister involved, they're a party of five.

[00:13:55] And then I got you.

[00:13:57] It quickly spirals.

[00:13:59] Cousins.

[00:14:00] Now there's 14 of us.

[00:14:01] Right.

[00:14:02] And it's like you guys.

[00:14:03] And then my sister will go, just get two reservations for seven.

[00:14:07] I'm like, okay, fine.

[00:14:08] I'll go back online.

[00:14:09] I was only allowed to buy eight tickets.

[00:14:12] God.

[00:14:13] Don't ever have three kids, for the record.

[00:14:16] Okay.

[00:14:16] Have an even number of children.

[00:14:18] If you're going into the children's forest, have an even number, because they always have

[00:14:22] a party of five.

[00:14:23] Mm-hmm.

[00:14:23] And then it's always, do we buy the sixth ticket, or do we cancel one kid who doesn't

[00:14:27] really care?

[00:14:28] Right.

[00:14:28] Like, I think Emily could be, you could give Emily just a hundred bucks and let her loose

[00:14:33] in the plaza going shopping, and I don't think she cared.

[00:14:36] Right.

[00:14:36] Or Claire.

[00:14:37] They like it, but, like, Jack wants to go to the game.

[00:14:39] And it's not a boy-girl thing.

[00:14:41] Like, I would have wanted to go to the game.

[00:14:42] It's just whatever.

[00:14:46] So, I'm just saying, if you're going to have kids, have two or four.

[00:14:50] Tay-Tay went and spent all day down there, and she likes to have a lot of talk about Kansas

[00:14:54] City.

[00:14:54] Dolly, uh, Cher's been quiet, Jelly Roll's just been, uh, doing nothing.

[00:14:59] Tom, it's, it's not going to work.

[00:15:01] That's my prediction.

[00:15:03] This will be his last year.

[00:15:04] He bought the Raiders, too.

[00:15:05] Part of the Raiders.

[00:15:06] It's out.

[00:15:07] Um, uh, Chapel posted a very funny video of her and her parents riding around singing

[00:15:11] her songs, and her mom can sing great.

[00:15:13] Her mom, you can hear her mom in the back seat.

[00:15:15] It was very adorable.

[00:15:17] And Dolly's been quiet, which only means there's another product coming out, like, in an hour.

[00:15:21] Let me check.

[00:15:21] Oh, I don't have a watch on it.

[00:15:22] That's right.

[00:15:24] This just made me laugh so hard.

[00:15:26] Because I always thought, is she right?

[00:15:28] But I don't ever care enough to Google it.

[00:15:31] This is 10 times Stevie Nicks was dead wrong about science.

[00:15:35] Now, I am also always wrong about science.

[00:15:39] This guy, I guess he's a science guy, just somehow got irritated.

[00:15:44] Stevie Nicks is unquestionably one of the greatest pop songwriters of all time.

[00:15:47] Unfortunately for her fans, she's made a long, she's made a career out of complete disregard

[00:15:52] for scientific accuracy, which is, and blood is on her hands.

[00:15:55] Here's 10 times she was dead wrong.

[00:15:58] Thunder only happens when it's raining.

[00:16:00] Now, I've thought that ain't, that's not right.

[00:16:02] Right?

[00:16:02] I never Google it.

[00:16:03] I don't care.

[00:16:04] But I've heard it thunder and there is no rain.

[00:16:06] But there might be rain over there.

[00:16:08] Right.

[00:16:08] Because the thunder's far away.

[00:16:09] Yep.

[00:16:10] So I just didn't decide on that one.

[00:16:12] Well, it's wrong.

[00:16:14] Nope.

[00:16:14] Stevie Nicks, aspiring meteorologist, needs to head back to class.

[00:16:18] Thunder can absolutely occur without raining and an appropriately named phenomenon known

[00:16:22] as dry thunderstorm, which transpires when the vast majority of participation evaporates

[00:16:26] before it hits the ground.

[00:16:27] Stevie Nicks is full of shit.

[00:16:31] Stevie, I'm with you.

[00:16:32] I'm not trolling you.

[00:16:34] I'm, this guy is.

[00:16:35] She has a song called Destiny Rules where she said, maybe we are together in a parallel universe.

[00:16:42] Well, this guy said, maybe there's a universe where Nicks doesn't spout off about a theory

[00:16:47] that can be neither disproven or proven despite its recent popularization in comic book movies.

[00:16:52] I personally hope there are infinite universes because that would be one where she faces justice

[00:16:59] for her scientific illiteracy.

[00:17:01] He's really mad.

[00:17:05] So, Welcome to the Room, Sarah, is a song.

[00:17:09] When you hang up that phone, will you cease to exist?

[00:17:14] He wrote, literal babies develop object permanence at eight months of age.

[00:17:19] Jesus Christ.

[00:17:23] It goes on and on.

[00:17:24] Let me see if there's a, I don't need to read them all.

[00:17:28] Oh, is she, so in the, in Sisters of the Moon, one of my favorite songs, she goes,

[00:17:34] and a black widow spider makes more sound than she.

[00:17:38] Okay, and I thought, I think what she's saying here is a black widow makes no noise.

[00:17:44] And this lady's more quiet than that.

[00:17:48] Right.

[00:17:50] This guy, he has a picture of it.

[00:17:51] While some spiders can make a hissing or purring noise, a black widow spider, an overly broad,

[00:17:56] frankly, amateur level term that could refer to as many as 30 different species in the family

[00:18:00] of Theranidioda, is not one of them.

[00:18:03] Therefore, it makes no sound.

[00:18:05] Thus, it is not louder than a living human's heartbeat.

[00:18:08] Eat shit, liar.

[00:18:13] I don't know.

[00:18:15] Oh, here's one from Landslide.

[00:18:16] Wait.

[00:18:17] That's great.

[00:18:18] Time makes you bolder.

[00:18:20] Okay, that's the quote.

[00:18:22] Fact check.

[00:18:23] Fuck, no, it doesn't.

[00:18:24] A recent study of fear response in rats suggested the development of the prefrontal cortex makes

[00:18:29] older individuals slower to clear fear than younger people and more aware of the risk

[00:18:35] associated with actions.

[00:18:36] Time may have made mixed nicks bolder, but if so, she's an outlier using said boldness

[00:18:41] to spread absolute knots.

[00:18:44] I just love that.

[00:18:45] How angry.

[00:18:46] That's great.

[00:18:47] We like, of course Stevie doesn't know.

[00:18:49] Right.

[00:18:49] I don't think she professes to know.

[00:18:51] I don't either.

[00:18:52] Who cares?

[00:18:53] It just rhymes and it sounds poetic.

[00:18:56] That's why I like Stevie's song.

[00:18:57] Mozo makes no sense at all.

[00:18:58] No.

[00:19:00] Update.

[00:19:03] Little Morgan Wallen.

[00:19:04] Uh-oh.

[00:19:05] Our little country star.

[00:19:06] Mm-hmm.

[00:19:06] Who I love every one of his songs and I will put the qualification there.

[00:19:11] I am aware of some of his offstage bad behavior and it is so noted with the court.

[00:19:19] But that doesn't mean I don't like his songs.

[00:19:22] No.

[00:19:22] Now he did get a little drunk downtown Broadway and threw a chair off of a very high, high rooftop

[00:19:27] bar and it was a real chair and it really could have killed someone.

[00:19:31] Well, they delayed all of his, you know, uh, his proceedings, shall we say, because he

[00:19:39] was on tour.

[00:19:40] He had to finish his tour.

[00:19:41] Right.

[00:19:41] Who's granted that bullshit?

[00:19:43] Get your ass home for a day and a half and we're going to have a little powwow and

[00:19:46] decide what to do with your redneck ass.

[00:19:49] Mm-hmm.

[00:19:50] Talk about privilege.

[00:19:53] Morgan Wallen will be locked up following a guilty plea.

[00:19:56] Stop it.

[00:19:57] Oh, yeah.

[00:19:57] They're sending him to jail?

[00:19:58] Uh-huh.

[00:19:59] But wait till you hear for how long.

[00:20:01] An hour.

[00:20:02] I, my liver would appreciate it.

[00:20:04] My liver would be like, yay, she can't get any alcohol for this many days.

[00:20:09] He was originally hit with three felony reckless endangerment charges after he threw a chair off

[00:20:14] a roof in Nashville.

[00:20:16] He was facing years behind bars and while he won't serve anything close to that, the Neon

[00:20:21] Eyes singer isn't getting off easy.

[00:20:23] As part of the deal, he pled to misdemeanor charges of reckless endangerment.

[00:20:30] The agreement will see him serve seven days.

[00:20:32] Seven.

[00:20:33] Seven.

[00:20:33] My liver would be so happy.

[00:20:35] So grateful.

[00:20:36] Yeah.

[00:20:37] Yeah.

[00:20:38] He, in custody at a DUI education center.

[00:20:42] Two, maybe, maybe Jelly Roll could go down there and sing for him.

[00:20:49] They're friends.

[00:20:50] And what if he gets sad like day three?

[00:20:52] Yeah.

[00:20:53] Jelly Belly could come down and do a show.

[00:20:55] I'm going to go by.

[00:20:56] Yeah.

[00:20:56] He likes to go to centers, juvenile detention centers.

[00:21:00] He could go to the DUI education center.

[00:21:02] Yes.

[00:21:02] He'll have two years of probation and pay a fine of $350.

[00:21:06] He makes that in approximately one nanosecond at a merch table, but that's fine.

[00:21:11] You could have put more on that.

[00:21:12] I'd make the fine bigger and give it to charity.

[00:21:15] He also received a suspended sentence.

[00:21:17] Good idea.

[00:21:18] Yeah.

[00:21:18] Right?

[00:21:19] Yeah.

[00:21:19] Yeah.

[00:21:20] He's rich.

[00:21:21] Yeah.

[00:21:22] And a lot of law is based on your abilities.

[00:21:26] So you've got an ability to pay a lot more.

[00:21:28] You could have killed it.

[00:21:29] He threw it at, unfortunately, he didn't do it on purpose, but when he threw it, it landed

[00:21:33] right next to two cops.

[00:21:34] Oh, wow.

[00:21:35] Right.

[00:21:36] So you could have killed a cop and you get a lot more trouble for killing a cop than

[00:21:39] you do a regular person, a non-cop.

[00:21:41] Yeah.

[00:21:42] It's 10 grand.

[00:21:44] No, 20.

[00:21:46] Five.

[00:21:46] 25 grand.

[00:21:47] Yeah.

[00:21:47] Yep.

[00:21:49] The court rests.

[00:21:53] 25 grand.

[00:21:54] And we're going to give it to, I don't know, well, we'll give it to this DUI education

[00:21:57] center where he'll be attending for the next people that have to come and we'll make it

[00:22:00] better.

[00:22:01] And then I'd like to give five to a cat shelter.

[00:22:03] Thank you.

[00:22:05] And then that would be written in my judge notes.

[00:22:07] And then the appellate court judge would go, wait, she gave five grand to the cat shelter.

[00:22:11] Yep.

[00:22:12] She sure did.

[00:22:12] Good.

[00:22:13] He will also be receive a suspended sentence of 11 months and 21, 29 days with seven of

[00:22:19] the days deducted.

[00:22:20] The chair throwing saga is officially over.

[00:22:23] He'll spend his, uh, where, where is he going to spend his time?

[00:22:26] I don't know where this DUI seven days is probably not much fun, but it's better than facing years

[00:22:30] behind bar.

[00:22:31] It is.

[00:22:32] Right.

[00:22:33] More of a fine.

[00:22:35] Yes.

[00:22:36] Update.

[00:22:37] Update.

[00:22:38] Oh, I forgot to talk about what we're watching.

[00:22:40] We're going to circle back after our updates for that because it's worth it.

[00:22:46] Okay.

[00:22:47] We have a mentally ill woman on the loose, but let me give points to this.

[00:22:52] We probably got a couple.

[00:22:53] We got, we got, we got a few, we got quite a few.

[00:22:56] It comes out in the holidays.

[00:22:57] The stowaway lady who flew to Delta, who flew Delta to Paris without a ticket.

[00:23:03] She has now been arrested again, trying to sneak into Canada on a bus.

[00:23:10] The Canadians.

[00:23:11] The Canadians.

[00:23:12] Well, I'm not sure.

[00:23:13] Hold on.

[00:23:14] The Russian woman who stowed away on a Delta flight to Paris has been caught again, trying

[00:23:18] to sneak into Canada.

[00:23:19] Now, obviously this woman has some mental issues, but smart enough to get through all the TSA

[00:23:23] shit.

[00:23:24] Didn't have a ticket.

[00:23:25] Didn't have identification, had nothing.

[00:23:28] Right.

[00:23:28] And now she's done it on a bus.

[00:23:30] Svetlana Dali, 57, was taken into custody at the U.S. border with Canada in Buffalo, New York.

[00:23:37] So see, no, the Americans caught her.

[00:23:40] You just piped down Canada.

[00:23:41] She was trying to custody.

[00:23:42] She, well, we'll see.

[00:23:45] By the way, our.

[00:23:46] She was caught in a McDonald's.

[00:23:47] No, I think she was caught on the American side.

[00:23:50] Nope.

[00:23:51] Um.

[00:23:53] She, she managed to cut off her ankle monitor.

[00:23:57] Well, they can't be that hard.

[00:24:00] God, you guys.

[00:24:01] I thought those things were for real.

[00:24:03] There used to be a club owner in Kansas City that drove me to radio and he had one on.

[00:24:07] And I go, can you?

[00:24:08] Oh yeah, yeah.

[00:24:08] He had all kinds of problems.

[00:24:09] I go, can you cut that off?

[00:24:10] He goes, I've tried.

[00:24:11] It's really hard.

[00:24:12] Not for Svetlana.

[00:24:13] Yeah.

[00:24:13] And that guy was 30 years ago.

[00:24:16] Oh my God.

[00:24:18] Her Philadelphia roommate found the ankle monitor on the floor, which at which point he reported her missing.

[00:24:24] She's a U.S. resident.

[00:24:25] She boarded a Greyhound bus for Canada from which she was apprehended.

[00:24:28] She's now an FBI custody inspector to be turned over to U.F. Marshals in Buffalo on Tuesday.

[00:24:33] She'll then go before her judge in New York City, in northern New York City, and is expected to be charged with bail jumping, which could result in spending five years behind prison.

[00:24:41] This lady needs to go to what we don't have anymore.

[00:24:43] State hospitals, mental institutions might.

[00:24:46] We might have some, but we don't have enough for everybody.

[00:24:50] Um, there's a lot of cuckoo towns.

[00:24:52] We got a lot of cuckoo birds running around for various reasons.

[00:24:55] Um, uh, she's a former real estate attorney.

[00:25:01] I mean, obviously she, this is not.

[00:25:05] The U.S., I'm pretty sure.

[00:25:07] She's been here for a long time.

[00:25:09] Um, she was released last week without having to pay bail, but was required to file a long list of conditions, including not travel outside of the designated area after prosecutors argued she had previously tried to get on planes at multiple domestic airports and an international one.

[00:25:22] Um, here she is in a cuckoo hat like she's going to Bali.

[00:25:25] Yeah, she's got a summer hat on.

[00:25:26] She's smiling.

[00:25:28] It's cuckoo town.

[00:25:29] Yeah.

[00:25:30] Um, in her most recent, recent effort in February this year in Miami, when she went into international arrivals area and walked into a custom zones in an effort to get to departures.

[00:25:42] Oh, so she tried it in Miami.

[00:25:44] Um, she then proved successful.

[00:25:46] We know about the JFA.

[00:25:49] Oh, she also dodged an airline employee scanning tickets to board the flight to Charles de Gaulle only to be discovered once on board.

[00:25:56] Yeah, we know all that.

[00:25:57] Um, you know, you don't send this one to prison.

[00:26:00] No.

[00:26:01] I mean, you can, but let's send her to a mental, let's get the, a psych evaluation going on here and then decide what do we do with cuckoo town prison?

[00:26:10] Well, she'll try to get out of there.

[00:26:12] I mean, it's clearly her thing.

[00:26:15] Yeah.

[00:26:16] Um, update update.

[00:26:20] This is so pathetic.

[00:26:23] What is the world coming to original Banksy?

[00:26:26] One of my favorites.

[00:26:27] It's monkeys hanging onto a clothesline.

[00:26:29] Uh, destroyed by workers after it fears it would attract graffiti.

[00:26:33] Now, instead of destroying it, cut it out.

[00:26:37] It's a, yeah, it's an overpass.

[00:26:39] It's art.

[00:26:40] But you could still cut it out.

[00:26:42] It's not the whole overpass.

[00:26:43] The mural featuring, um, three black monkeys swinging along in marriage and imaginary rope with stencil, was stencil sprayed on a span of concrete railway bridge in London.

[00:26:56] Um, it's been wiped out by transportation officials over worries it could lead to a surge in graffiti.

[00:27:01] Stunning fans learned today.

[00:27:03] Me being one of them.

[00:27:04] The iconic mural depicting three silhouetted monkeys on an invisible line was sprayed into a section.

[00:27:09] That's how they, that's how he did it.

[00:27:10] Uh-huh.

[00:27:11] But in a move that shocked the artworks fans, it's been revealed that the rail staff has deliberately obliterated the work with high-power, they, pressure, power-washed it.

[00:27:19] High-pressure, with a high-pressure hose.

[00:27:20] Oh, my God.

[00:27:21] Hose.

[00:27:22] Locals in East London watch a gas as the piece was blasted from the arch recently.

[00:27:27] Oh, that's awful.

[00:27:28] It's awful.

[00:27:29] Like, who are these guys with hoses and who ordered them to do that?

[00:27:32] I don't know.

[00:27:32] All by him or herself.

[00:27:34] No.

[00:27:34] This is ridiculous.

[00:27:36] Terrible.

[00:27:37] Awful.

[00:27:38] Terrible.

[00:27:39] Terrible.

[00:27:40] Terrible, as Charles Barkley would say.

[00:27:41] Terrible.

[00:27:42] Just terrible.

[00:27:43] Update.

[00:27:46] Let's talk about Polo.

[00:27:49] Prince Harry and Meghan is horrible, god-awful, boring.

[00:27:52] Not only, I can't watch it, the horse parts, because I think it's too mean to the horses.

[00:27:56] Now, why don't I feel exactly the same way about horse racing?

[00:28:00] I don't know.

[00:28:02] Not the biggest fan of that either.

[00:28:04] And I'm not like an animal rights person.

[00:28:07] That's not my hobby or nothing.

[00:28:08] But to see what they do in polo to these horses.

[00:28:12] And Harry rode one, and they told him not to, a pregnant one.

[00:28:15] This is when he lived in England.

[00:28:16] And it died.

[00:28:18] It had a heart attack afterwards.

[00:28:19] I mean, I just don't know how you don't.

[00:28:22] Just for fun?

[00:28:23] I mean, horse racing is also for fun and for gambling.

[00:28:26] But horse racing, I feel like in polo, they're doing weird things.

[00:28:30] Like, they stop on a dime to break their legs.

[00:28:33] Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[00:28:34] Well, I watched one episode.

[00:28:37] I mean, I didn't even make it all the way through.

[00:28:39] The people are so boring.

[00:28:40] They're so rich.

[00:28:41] It's unwatchable.

[00:28:42] This is the review.

[00:28:44] And this is from The Guardian.

[00:28:48] Prepare, Harry and Meghan.

[00:28:51] To briefly paraphrase Hans Gruber, when Harry saw the breadth of his Netflix deal, he wept,

[00:28:59] for there were no more family members to slag off.

[00:29:03] In 2020, they signed him and Meg, signed a deal for $100 million with Netflix to produce,

[00:29:09] as they put it, content that informs but also gives hope.

[00:29:12] How does this show do either one?

[00:29:14] I don't know.

[00:29:15] First of all, there's no one at the matches.

[00:29:17] And I thought, wow, none of the producers, nobody in the editing room went, hey, maybe

[00:29:21] we don't show it like this because there's no fans.

[00:29:24] It's just a few rich people hanging around.

[00:29:29] They wanted powerful storytelling.

[00:29:31] Powerful.

[00:29:32] No.

[00:29:32] This storytelling is so boring.

[00:29:34] It's just rich people bitching and moaning.

[00:29:36] And a truthful and relatable lens.

[00:29:38] There's nothing relatable about this.

[00:29:39] When they say they want to make it a sport that's inclusive.

[00:29:41] Well, I'm short a horse.

[00:29:43] Right.

[00:29:44] What does that cost?

[00:29:46] 10 grand?

[00:29:46] How much does that horse cost?

[00:29:48] And then I got to buy all the shit for it.

[00:29:50] The saddle.

[00:29:51] I got to get myself boots.

[00:29:52] We're talking 25 grand.

[00:29:54] And you have to fly it, please.

[00:29:56] Then I got to fly it.

[00:29:56] I haven't started flying the thing.

[00:29:59] People think that a cello's a problem.

[00:30:02] No shit.

[00:30:03] Everybody bitches at all the musicians getting on the flights in Nashville.

[00:30:05] You bring that guitar on here.

[00:30:07] Yeah, he is.

[00:30:08] And it's going to take up the whole goddamn compartment.

[00:30:10] My pony's getting on next.

[00:30:11] Buckle in.

[00:30:13] Yep.

[00:30:18] The goal was for Polo to do what Last Chance University did for American football.

[00:30:23] Now, a friend of mine's kid worked on Last Chance U.

[00:30:26] It's great.

[00:30:27] It's the football thing about this is the last chance for you to get on a path to get to the NFL.

[00:30:34] But these are all underdogs, kids with no money.

[00:30:36] It has nothing in common.

[00:30:39] Or what did Disney Plucks Welcome to Wrexham did for lower league football?

[00:30:43] I never saw that one.

[00:30:44] These shows were underdog stories.

[00:30:46] Last Chance U revolved around talented young men with no safety net, owing problems to either social behavior, blah, blah, blah.

[00:30:57] These guys are like troubled guys.

[00:31:00] Polo, though, is about polo.

[00:31:02] And polo is the stupidest, most obnoxious sport known to humanity.

[00:31:06] It's a plague out of the rich.

[00:31:07] It's a sport where fixtures are chosen by popping confetti filled balloon.

[00:31:12] Oh, wow.

[00:31:12] They do it like a nightmarish gender reveal party.

[00:31:16] So I don't know what fixtures means in polo.

[00:31:21] Like who gets the ball first?

[00:31:23] Or is it called a ball?

[00:31:25] What's that thing they're hitting?

[00:31:26] A ball?

[00:31:29] I know it's a mallet.

[00:31:30] It requires incredible wealth, usually inherited, which means you could tip a bucket of paint over the entire sport and not hit a single person who even remotely qualified as an underdog.

[00:31:39] It's a show where the privileged people show it's exactly how privileged they are, which means there isn't a lot of drama to be found.

[00:31:47] Fixtures is a schedule.

[00:31:49] Okay.

[00:31:50] Well, we did learn something.

[00:31:51] What'd they say?

[00:31:52] I was supposed to learn something?

[00:31:53] Yeah.

[00:31:53] Okay, I did.

[00:31:54] If I ever attend a polo match, which I will not in this lifetime, I'll know.

[00:31:58] About polo, what to know to enjoy the game.

[00:32:01] What to know to enjoy the game.

[00:32:02] I'm not going to enjoy the game because I think it's mean to the horses.

[00:32:05] Yeah.

[00:32:06] And it's just for no reason.

[00:32:08] Right.

[00:32:08] But unintentionally, the cast of characters is largely made up men who take polo far too seriously because they have nothing else to do.

[00:32:15] You're rich.

[00:32:16] And the women around them who are left neglected.

[00:32:19] Oh, sad clown.

[00:32:20] She's going to, yeah.

[00:32:21] Yeah, I'll leave you a shot.

[00:32:26] I'm just going for the highlights of this so you don't need to hear the whole thing.

[00:32:29] It's terrible, though.

[00:32:31] In fairness, polo isn't completely awful.

[00:32:34] There's this awful, there's a subplot about Adolfo Cambicio, the Michael Jordan of polo.

[00:32:39] Well, I didn't pick up on that.

[00:32:41] Michael Jordan of polo.

[00:32:41] Right.

[00:32:42] There is no Michael Jordan of polo.

[00:32:44] Stop it.

[00:32:45] But I mean, I like everything else that's right or wrong.

[00:32:48] Coming to terms with the fact that his son is starting to supersede him.

[00:32:51] And there's a serious accident midway through the series that causes some of the subjects to act like human beings for actually a minute.

[00:32:58] If you find yourself being sucked into this documentary by the power of human stories, as I am, this is about the best you'll find.

[00:33:05] Yeah.

[00:33:12] Yeah.

[00:33:13] The end of the final season goes out on its way to tee up a sequel.

[00:33:18] No way.

[00:33:19] It's already fallen off the thing.

[00:33:21] No.

[00:33:21] So there's your review.

[00:33:22] There you have it.

[00:33:24] There you go.

[00:33:25] Now, let's talk about what we've been watching here.

[00:33:28] Termites.

[00:33:28] Did you go watch Landman?

[00:33:29] You should.

[00:33:30] It's wonderful.

[00:33:31] Yes.

[00:33:31] I won't keep harping on that.

[00:33:33] But Lewis told me there's a show called Sticky.

[00:33:39] Yeah.

[00:33:39] And that late.

[00:33:40] There's an older lady.

[00:33:41] I like it.

[00:33:41] I'll have to research that.

[00:33:42] But anyway, I watched the JonBenet Ramsey thing.

[00:33:47] Well, there's a lot I didn't know.

[00:33:50] And I thought if you're going to watch it, I think it's three episodes.

[00:33:53] Just know that the first 20, 30 minutes, you're going to be like, well, I already knew all this.

[00:33:58] Like if you watch the news, you would have already known.

[00:34:00] Right.

[00:34:00] Well, after watching it, then I thought my sister and I were talking.

[00:34:08] We don't think the dad did it or covered it up, which is a change of heart.

[00:34:14] Oh, I don't know.

[00:34:15] I thought the dad didn't do it, but I thought he might have set up the cover up.

[00:34:20] There were a lot of people who knew about his bonus, apparently, and that could have really pissed somebody off.

[00:34:25] I don't see him doing.

[00:34:27] He's 81 or 82 years old now, and he's thrown himself into this.

[00:34:31] If the dead wife had done it and he covered for her or the son had done it and he covered for him, I don't think you'd keep bringing it up the rest of your life.

[00:34:39] That's true.

[00:34:39] You'd just be quiet and think, well, we got away with it.

[00:34:42] You know, shut up.

[00:34:44] Live with the guilt.

[00:34:45] There's a lot in there.

[00:34:47] And the cops in Boulder really need to self-check and self-correct because it's everything my dad would say could happen.

[00:34:55] And it did.

[00:34:56] They just started making shit up.

[00:34:57] The evidence was terrible.

[00:34:59] The DNA, I think, has been destroyed forever.

[00:35:00] I mean, I don't know, though, now that people send in, I have a story about sending, don't send your stuff into Ancestry.

[00:35:08] If you haven't already, unless you have relatives, you'd like to get in trouble.

[00:35:13] If you got something, you would have defaced the music.

[00:35:16] Put your DNA out there and it'll lead them back to them.

[00:35:20] It's really interesting, even if you were alive and paying attention the whole time during the JonBenet Ramsey case, there's a lot of new stuff in there that made me change my mind.

[00:35:32] And I really thought my mind was kind of made up.

[00:35:36] So I would give it a B plus, maybe an A minus.

[00:35:42] It starts out a little slow, but I think they're doing it for the children and for people who don't really know the whole story.

[00:35:48] Just plow through that part, true crime fans that already know all that.

[00:35:55] Yellowstone.

[00:35:57] Let's talk about it.

[00:36:01] Taylor Sheridan really made the whole thing about himself.

[00:36:03] It's very clear that Kevin Costner was what we needed.

[00:36:06] And like or don't like Kevin, I don't care.

[00:36:12] Taylor, I just, Taylor loves Taylor.

[00:36:15] Taylor looks like one of those overly worked out guys over 50 at the gym where you're like, oh.

[00:36:22] One's a grunt.

[00:36:23] Yeah, a lot of grunting, a lot of sweat flying.

[00:36:26] I mean, good for him.

[00:36:28] He's in shape.

[00:36:28] But he's in the whole.

[00:36:29] Here's what I did like about it.

[00:36:32] A lot of people really.

[00:36:33] A lot of people saying it was worst ever.

[00:36:35] I do like it when a show wraps it up.

[00:36:38] I don't like, as a Libra, I need my story to have an end.

[00:36:41] It's like going into the library and tearing out the last chapter of every book.

[00:36:44] Well, fuck.

[00:36:45] I don't want to read it.

[00:36:47] The Sopranos.

[00:36:47] Well, that's what they did.

[00:36:48] The Sopranos.

[00:36:49] I don't know.

[00:36:50] I invested all this time.

[00:36:52] And I don't know if he had a heart attack.

[00:36:53] I don't know if he got shot.

[00:36:54] And you think it's funny?

[00:36:56] It's bullshit.

[00:36:58] At least Yellowstone wrapped it up.

[00:37:00] Everything that happened.

[00:37:02] And I'll give him credit.

[00:37:05] Yes, did I think it was going to happen like that?

[00:37:08] Yes.

[00:37:10] But Taylor Shannon has this romanticized view of what do you want, dude?

[00:37:16] Cowboys.

[00:37:17] Cowboys in Montana.

[00:37:18] Do you want people to never, ever, ever come to Montana again?

[00:37:22] Like, as long as the world population keeps going up, people are going to go where there's less people.

[00:37:28] It's just a net unless it's like there's nothing pretty.

[00:37:32] Well, you know, there's some states nobody's running to them.

[00:37:36] I'm just saying I don't need to point those out.

[00:37:37] I think those states know who they are, where the population doesn't really grow.

[00:37:42] But like a Montana and a Wyoming can be beautiful for three months out of the year and boom, the rich people are going to come.

[00:37:47] It's just a natural thing.

[00:37:49] And Taylor Sheridan wants this, well, kind of to all go back to Native Americans.

[00:37:55] Okay.

[00:37:56] But then what are they going to do with it?

[00:37:57] Right.

[00:37:58] Nothing?

[00:37:59] Are we just going to have nothing?

[00:38:00] Somebody's going to take it again.

[00:38:01] Right.

[00:38:02] That's just math.

[00:38:04] So his romanticized, that's just math.

[00:38:08] Human math.

[00:38:08] Greed.

[00:38:09] You know, people are going to do what they do.

[00:38:13] As my niece Emily would say, do what you do what you do.

[00:38:17] Yeah.

[00:38:17] Greedy people are going to come take it.

[00:38:20] You know, they don't want any, he doesn't want any progress.

[00:38:22] He doesn't want any condos or ski resorts or, you know, I'm sure there's better ways to allocate.

[00:38:31] Banff Canada does it great.

[00:38:33] That's never going to be.

[00:38:34] It's also in a national park.

[00:38:35] So that's kind of kind of caveat.

[00:38:38] Carve it out.

[00:38:39] Carve out Park City, Utah and say that's it.

[00:38:41] Yep.

[00:38:42] Can't move here unless you're from Utah or whatever the hell.

[00:38:44] Or America.

[00:38:48] I gave it a B plus.

[00:38:52] Now, the whole season was ridiculous.

[00:38:53] I have to say that.

[00:38:54] But then you get caught.

[00:38:55] What are you going to not watch to the end to find out who shot JR?

[00:38:59] Of course you're going to watch.

[00:39:00] So, well, I mean, I don't know.

[00:39:02] It pissed enough people off.

[00:39:03] I think a lot of people were like, no, we're not doing it.

[00:39:06] But it was entertaining.

[00:39:09] You know, good enough.

[00:39:10] They never, they never put the.

[00:39:15] Nothing happened to the trust people.

[00:39:17] Well, Jamie got his comeuppance, Rip, and then the Cowboys.

[00:39:22] And that lady with that Southern accent, the farmhand.

[00:39:25] I can't.

[00:39:26] I can't.

[00:39:27] It's not even Southern.

[00:39:28] It's not Southern.

[00:39:29] I don't know what it is.

[00:39:30] It's a contrived something.

[00:39:31] I don't like to be negative, but that one made my ears bleed.

[00:39:34] Like, how come nobody said anything?

[00:39:37] Like, if I'm walking around doing an accent horribly,

[00:39:40] I would hope someone would tell me.

[00:39:42] We do.

[00:39:43] Right.

[00:39:43] Yes.

[00:39:44] No, the worst Southern accent.

[00:39:45] That lady's is terrible.

[00:39:46] Well, Lewis's is the worst.

[00:39:49] So he, he, he just goes,

[00:39:52] Hey, we're going to go down to the grocery store.

[00:39:58] What is that?

[00:40:00] Yeah.

[00:40:00] He's got, he's got a lot of bleh.

[00:40:03] Like, I'm like, Oh my God, you have no ear for accents.

[00:40:05] Like some, I don't know.

[00:40:07] Cause I'm not around them, but the ones I'm around, I can mimic really quickly.

[00:40:11] His is awful.

[00:40:13] His, he can't do his English or Irish.

[00:40:16] He's just not an accent guy.

[00:40:17] I'm not a math person.

[00:40:18] We all got our thing.

[00:40:19] That is not his thing.

[00:40:20] Yo, I'm going to go down here.

[00:40:22] I mean, and I'm actually doing it better.

[00:40:25] My impression of Lewis black doing his Southern accent, but it does make me laugh.

[00:40:30] And he is a good sport because he'll keep doing it.

[00:40:31] If I ask him to keep going, then what are we going to do?

[00:40:35] Then what are we going to do after this bottle of wine?

[00:40:38] Um, okay, we're moving on.

[00:40:40] So that's the, that's, what's been watching.

[00:40:42] Although there's some Hallmark movies, Hanukkah on the rocks was fabulous.

[00:40:46] Did you watch that?

[00:40:47] I loved it.

[00:40:48] And it's like, there's a million Jewish words that Lewis has taught me throughout the years

[00:40:52] that I wouldn't have known other than him being my best friend.

[00:40:56] But in this movie, they use all of them.

[00:40:59] Like it's taken me a lifetime to hear every once in a while, Lou will say a word.

[00:41:02] And I'm like, well, I don't know what that means.

[00:41:04] And then he's like, oh, it's, it's Yiddish slang for whatever.

[00:41:07] But I mean, it's taken me 30 years to learn all that.

[00:41:10] Like Lewis doesn't use those words.

[00:41:13] It's supposed to teach you about Hanukkah.

[00:41:16] And, uh, but it was good.

[00:41:18] I liked it.

[00:41:19] So if you see that one come up, uh, the joyful Miss Miracle, three siblings hate each other

[00:41:24] and are forced to come home to determine what their dead grandma's corporation.

[00:41:28] Excellent.

[00:41:29] I need a few more Prince and royalty things though.

[00:41:31] And they're just not coming out this season.

[00:41:33] I need castles.

[00:41:34] I need made up countries and I need an orphan.

[00:41:38] Um, well, a widow with a child that needs a mother or a father.

[00:41:42] I don't care.

[00:41:46] Yonder star.

[00:41:47] I like the lead actress in that one.

[00:41:49] T actor.

[00:41:50] Sorry.

[00:41:50] TV star waits out a scandal in a Vermont in.

[00:41:54] Yes.

[00:41:55] Yes.

[00:41:56] Christmas in Montana.

[00:41:58] Did you put this what you put this one on here?

[00:42:00] I didn't like it.

[00:42:03] Yeah.

[00:42:03] Yeah.

[00:42:03] You get to see Montana and horses.

[00:42:05] It's that lady.

[00:42:09] Oh, it's from Caroline Ray show.

[00:42:11] Uh, Sabrina, the teenage witch, Melissa Joan Hart.

[00:42:16] I like her and everybody in it's good.

[00:42:18] There's just no villain.

[00:42:19] There's no controversy.

[00:42:20] People forget in these movies, you have to have conflict.

[00:42:22] It's always about at the end.

[00:42:24] Should I take the job back in the city?

[00:42:26] I mean, Oh, come on.

[00:42:28] I waited all this time for that to be your conflict.

[00:42:31] No, I need like an evil stepmother, that kind of shit that I just did basic Disney premises.

[00:42:36] My God.

[00:42:38] I'm not watching the wizard of Oz.

[00:42:40] I'm never watching it.

[00:42:41] People don't understand.

[00:42:43] If you grew up in Missouri, Kansas is right fucking there.

[00:42:46] I'm like, wait, this shit could happen here.

[00:42:48] It's right there.

[00:42:50] It's not like you said, Oh, in California, I would have went, well, okay, I'll see what,

[00:42:53] you know, I don't care if it's horrifying.

[00:42:54] I'm never going to live there.

[00:42:56] That's what I would have thought when I was seven.

[00:42:58] No desire.

[00:43:00] No, I won't watch that.

[00:43:02] People get in it and Star Wars, as we've discussed.

[00:43:05] We're moving on.

[00:43:07] Holy shit.

[00:43:08] They found it.

[00:43:09] The real face of Santa Claus revealed.

[00:43:12] This is from my research assistant, Heather in Arizona.

[00:43:16] After 1700 years and just in time for Christmas.

[00:43:21] Here comes the real Santa Claus.

[00:43:23] Wouldn't it be great if he looked like Bucky?

[00:43:26] Um, remarkable new high tech images reveal the face of the real life Bishop who inspired

[00:43:31] the concept of Santa Claus more than 1700 years ago after he first made Christmas merry

[00:43:35] and bright.

[00:43:36] Scientists use data from the skull of St. Nicholas of Myra, whose penchant for gift

[00:43:41] giving prompted the legend of Father Christmas.

[00:43:45] Papa Claus.

[00:43:46] Papa Claus.

[00:43:47] Yeah.

[00:43:47] St. Nicholas.

[00:43:48] The skull had a very robust appearance, generating a strong face as its dimensions on the horizontal

[00:43:53] axis are stronger than average.

[00:43:55] This characteristic combined with a thick beard is very reminiscent of the figure we have

[00:43:59] in mind.

[00:44:00] It looks, they did a remodeling.

[00:44:01] It looks just like what you would call Santa Claus.

[00:44:04] Oh.

[00:44:04] Exactly.

[00:44:05] Like it.

[00:44:06] Yeah.

[00:44:06] So they did a good year throughout the years.

[00:44:08] They kept it pretty accurate.

[00:44:10] Yeah.

[00:44:10] That's a lot of police drawings over all these 1700 years, you know?

[00:44:14] It's like it gave a telephone that went well.

[00:44:19] St. Nicholas of Myra, known for rewarding well-behaved kids with gifts, first inspired

[00:44:23] Dutch folklore figure Sinterklaas.

[00:44:26] St. Nicholas.

[00:44:27] Which, by the way, speaking of words like that, the Germans refer to their cat as Stubentigers,

[00:44:35] which means living room tiger.

[00:44:37] Stubentiger.

[00:44:37] Stubentiger.

[00:44:38] Oh, I like it.

[00:44:39] I do too.

[00:44:40] That's fantastic.

[00:44:40] Where's my Stubentiger?

[00:44:42] My Stubentiger.

[00:44:45] Who later became the Dutch folklore figure Sinterklaas, who later became the jolly sleigh-riding

[00:44:51] old guy who brings kids toys in the U.S.

[00:44:53] Nice.

[00:44:54] They were surprised to find the scientifically produced images matched early descriptions

[00:44:58] of Santa Claus in literature, such as an 1823 poem, Twas the Night Before Christmas,

[00:45:02] describes rosy cheeks, a broad face, and a nose like a cherry.

[00:45:05] That also could be an alcoholic.

[00:45:07] I'm just saying.

[00:45:09] I have some uncles whose drinking would be what we would call questionable and very red

[00:45:19] noses.

[00:45:21] Studying the saint's remains also revealed he suffered from chronic arthritis in his spine

[00:45:26] and his pelvis and a thick skull that caused frequent headaches.

[00:45:31] The scientist said the saint also likely survived off a mostly plant-based diet.

[00:45:36] Well, how do you get so chubby?

[00:45:37] All right.

[00:45:38] Uh-oh.

[00:45:39] He was initially buried in Myra, or modern-day Turkey.

[00:45:43] His bones were later moved to Bari, Italy, where they remain today.

[00:45:45] I do not think of Santa Claus in Italy.

[00:45:48] No.

[00:45:49] No.

[00:45:49] No.

[00:45:51] We initially reconstructed the skull in 3D using the data, while we supplemented this with anatomical

[00:45:59] deformation technique in which the tomography of the living person's head is adjusted to

[00:46:05] come up with the thing.

[00:46:06] So there you go.

[00:46:07] Santa Claus looked like Santa Claus.

[00:46:09] No.

[00:46:09] Don't worry about it.

[00:46:10] Nope.

[00:46:10] We're all good.

[00:46:11] We're not.

[00:46:12] We haven't been being lied to.

[00:46:13] Thank God.

[00:46:14] Thank you.

[00:46:15] Let's talk about the drones.

[00:46:18] There's so many things.

[00:46:19] They're not in Canada.

[00:46:21] They're not in Canada.

[00:46:22] Not yet.

[00:46:23] No.

[00:46:25] No.

[00:46:26] There's two things going on.

[00:46:27] And I cannot believe my younger brother and sister are not on TikTok.

[00:46:31] All I've done is send like a thousand TikTok links.

[00:46:35] And then they're like, oh yeah, I'm not on TikTok.

[00:46:37] And then my sister's like, I have to be home to be on TikTok.

[00:46:40] I don't even know what that means.

[00:46:41] Home?

[00:46:42] I guess the big computer.

[00:46:43] I cannot.

[00:46:44] No, home at her house.

[00:46:46] Like it's not on her phone.

[00:46:48] And I'm like, oh, you parent people.

[00:46:51] They're all on Facebook.

[00:46:53] Because their kid's bullshit is on Facebook.

[00:46:56] Does she have a man?

[00:46:56] No, she has an iPhone.

[00:46:58] I'm the only one in the family with an Android.

[00:46:59] And I'm remaining strong.

[00:47:00] I'm not giving in.

[00:47:01] I'm not folding.

[00:47:02] I don't care if I see your movies.

[00:47:03] I don't care if my pictures come to you as tiny, tiny little thumbs up.

[00:47:07] Yeah.

[00:47:07] Well, there's always a movie.

[00:47:08] And then eventually they take me off.

[00:47:10] Because I ruined the chain.

[00:47:12] Yeah.

[00:47:12] I talk about it in my act.

[00:47:14] It actually turned in.

[00:47:15] There's like 37 people on the family thread.

[00:47:17] And then there's sub-family threads of the family threads.

[00:47:21] And I'm, yeah.

[00:47:23] Eventually I get kicked off most.

[00:47:25] Well, I'm asked to leave.

[00:47:27] I'm asked to leave politely.

[00:47:28] Will you please remove yourself?

[00:47:29] Because if an iPhone person starts it and includes me, they can't leave until I say so.

[00:47:35] Yep.

[00:47:35] People don't know that.

[00:47:36] But it's the truth.

[00:47:37] Have you activated your new phone?

[00:47:41] Of course I have not activated the new phone I walked in and plopped.

[00:47:44] I don't know.

[00:47:45] $800 phone.

[00:47:46] Because I won't give them my old ones.

[00:47:47] Okay.

[00:47:48] I don't know.

[00:47:49] It's something in my dad's lawyer brain that says, don't give him that.

[00:47:53] I don't trust him.

[00:47:55] Blow it up.

[00:47:56] I don't trust him.

[00:47:58] They could go in and steal shit.

[00:48:00] I mean, mostly it's pictures of my cats.

[00:48:02] But I do have all these apps.

[00:48:03] You know, Coinbase.

[00:48:04] That's got my Bitcoin.

[00:48:05] Yeah.

[00:48:06] I don't.

[00:48:06] I'd rather just pay.

[00:48:08] I only get a new phone once every 15 years.

[00:48:10] So I don't give a shit.

[00:48:13] Not like my friend,

[00:48:14] Ann Lurie will be the first one to go to the Apple store for a new phone.

[00:48:18] I've never seen somebody so excited about tech.

[00:48:20] It's adorable.

[00:48:21] I'm like, you really get like, maybe if they told me there was a new beer in there, I would

[00:48:25] go.

[00:48:26] You get a new beer with your phone.

[00:48:28] No.

[00:48:28] If I've been in any Apple store, you'll know it.

[00:48:30] Because my website's on every open computer in there.

[00:48:32] That's all I do.

[00:48:33] While I'm waiting for whatever child.

[00:48:36] I will say though, the service there is the most impeccable thing.

[00:48:39] The whole world should run like an Apple store.

[00:48:41] Some child runs up to me with a handheld thing and goes, what can I get for you?

[00:48:44] And I go that.

[00:48:45] I'll be right back.

[00:48:46] And then they run away.

[00:48:47] And they're like, here, do you have a credit card?

[00:48:49] And they show it.

[00:48:50] And I think, here's a bag.

[00:48:51] It's extra 10 cents.

[00:48:53] Okay.

[00:48:54] Great.

[00:48:54] See you later, get her.

[00:48:55] Okay.

[00:48:56] See ya.

[00:48:56] Wouldn't want to be yet.

[00:48:58] I don't know what these drones are.

[00:49:00] But there's also another thing going on.

[00:49:03] Blinking lights.

[00:49:04] Parking lots.

[00:49:05] Parked cars.

[00:49:06] It's in Memphis.

[00:49:07] It's in Asheville.

[00:49:08] By the way, they are not near one another.

[00:49:10] Asheville's on the furthest eastern part of the state.

[00:49:12] Memphis is on the furthest.

[00:49:14] I haven't seen any in Nashville.

[00:49:16] But they're all over Tennessee.

[00:49:18] St. Pete.

[00:49:19] These are the videos I sent to my siblings this morning.

[00:49:21] I'm like, well, there's a drone here in Nashville.

[00:49:24] But not the blinking light syndrome.

[00:49:25] There's two separate things going on.

[00:49:27] Right, right, right, right.

[00:49:28] And then there's the orb thing.

[00:49:29] And the orbs are sending out tinier orbs.

[00:49:33] Now, here's...

[00:49:33] I don't think they're aliens.

[00:49:36] Maybe, though.

[00:49:37] And if they're going to take us somewhere,

[00:49:40] I just don't want to find out when I get to Pluto,

[00:49:42] drinking's been canceled.

[00:49:43] Like, I don't care where we go as long as there's still a fun bar.

[00:49:46] Fair enough.

[00:49:47] It's fine with me.

[00:49:48] You know, whatever.

[00:49:51] But I'm leaning towards my brother.

[00:49:53] It's not just my brother.

[00:49:54] But the theory that they're looking for something...

[00:50:00] I also...

[00:50:01] My redneck side thinks it's complete bullshit

[00:50:04] that I can't shoot something that's hovering over my house.

[00:50:08] Bullshit.

[00:50:10] As I get my super redneck on and go,

[00:50:13] it's my property.

[00:50:14] Yeah.

[00:50:15] It's my property.

[00:50:16] Do I own the air?

[00:50:17] Up to 400 feet I do.

[00:50:19] What?

[00:50:19] Well, that's...

[00:50:20] They can't fly lower than 400 feet.

[00:50:22] Or they can fly...

[00:50:22] They can't fly above 400 feet.

[00:50:24] That's the law.

[00:50:26] So you read them.

[00:50:27] Own the air?

[00:50:28] Well, I decided I own the air.

[00:50:30] Because you're threatening me.

[00:50:32] You are threatening me.

[00:50:33] That is a threat.

[00:50:35] You can't have a giant, terrifying machine

[00:50:39] that's going like this,

[00:50:41] which is exactly the way...

[00:50:42] I got my hair cut this morning.

[00:50:44] The girl's fingernails were so long,

[00:50:45] I felt like there was a drone scratching my head

[00:50:48] with all of the power

[00:50:49] and a little too much,

[00:50:50] like, easy breezy here.

[00:50:52] I don't need holes in my head.

[00:50:53] Let's chill out of it.

[00:50:53] Anyway.

[00:50:55] I think they're searching for something.

[00:50:58] People say it's something radioactive, maybe.

[00:51:01] My friend Dory lives in New Jersey.

[00:51:03] She said it's getting out of hand.

[00:51:05] I don't understand.

[00:51:06] I know Biden has slipped, for sure,

[00:51:09] and is not really 100% on it.

[00:51:13] Maybe the Department of Defense...

[00:51:14] Maybe the Department of Defense...

[00:51:15] My little friend John Kirby,

[00:51:16] you're going to see a guy on the news all the time.

[00:51:17] I actually punched up a speech for him

[00:51:19] and made it kind of funny.

[00:51:20] I probably shouldn't even say that I did that,

[00:51:21] but he won't care.

[00:51:23] He's an honest man,

[00:51:24] but I mean, as far as I could tell,

[00:51:26] but also, I don't know what he's allowed to say.

[00:51:30] Why isn't the president or the FAA...

[00:51:33] And then some people are like,

[00:51:34] ah, those are just planes.

[00:51:35] My ass.

[00:51:36] They're not planes.

[00:51:38] They're somebody's drones.

[00:51:39] And if this all turns out to be Elon,

[00:51:42] I don't even know how to respond to that,

[00:51:43] except I'll just have to buy more Bitcoin.

[00:51:46] Um, because he's in charge of that.

[00:51:49] He bought something.

[00:51:50] He bought a drone company.

[00:51:52] Is this him playing with toys?

[00:51:53] But I think you should be in trouble for that

[00:51:55] because you're scaring the shit out of people.

[00:51:57] It would scare the shit out of me

[00:51:58] if there was a drone out there.

[00:52:00] Yeah.

[00:52:00] I'd be...

[00:52:00] First, I'd be like, get the cats.

[00:52:02] Get...

[00:52:03] Where are the cats?

[00:52:04] They're all outside somewhere running around being...

[00:52:06] Like, I don't think you should be able to do that.

[00:52:09] Except baby cats.

[00:52:10] Well, I want all the cats in.

[00:52:14] No, baby cat doesn't really.

[00:52:16] She's not really a cat.

[00:52:17] She's more of a dog.

[00:52:20] She knows her name.

[00:52:21] She knows when she's in trouble.

[00:52:23] She behaves.

[00:52:24] She posed very well for my video.

[00:52:26] I put a Santa hat that one of the termites made.

[00:52:29] Yeah.

[00:52:29] She was just like, fuck off.

[00:52:30] Are we really doing this on Monday?

[00:52:32] She knows Monday.

[00:52:32] I told her you're going to lose your SAG after card

[00:52:34] as a working actor if you don't put this...

[00:52:37] Wardrobe is here.

[00:52:38] One of the termites put a lot of effort into making that for her

[00:52:42] and it looks fucking adorable.

[00:52:44] She wanted...

[00:52:45] Cats don't like clothing.

[00:52:46] They don't...

[00:52:46] Cats aren't like playful.

[00:52:48] Well, a lot of dogs don't either.

[00:52:49] But anyway.

[00:52:51] Now, here's the thing.

[00:52:53] I wouldn't think that a .22 rifle could hit it.

[00:53:00] Shotgun, no.

[00:53:01] But I don't...

[00:53:03] I don't know the guns that could hit it,

[00:53:05] but I'm sure they exist.

[00:53:06] You're like a .22?

[00:53:07] No.

[00:53:09] Let's say...

[00:53:10] Let's say in this house,

[00:53:11] if it's hovering 100 feet above here,

[00:53:15] a .22 is not going to do nothing to it.

[00:53:16] 300.

[00:53:17] 300 yards.

[00:53:18] Right.

[00:53:19] Okay.

[00:53:19] Well, it's not going to do anything.

[00:53:21] You need more of like an assault rifle.

[00:53:24] But even that, I don't know what would do it,

[00:53:27] but I think you have the right to shoot it.

[00:53:29] Yeah.

[00:53:29] It's bullshit.

[00:53:30] You can just fly something two feet over this house?

[00:53:34] It's scary.

[00:53:35] What?

[00:53:36] Scary.

[00:53:37] It's terribly scary.

[00:53:39] Um...

[00:53:40] It's been going on for a month.

[00:53:42] No, it's all over now.

[00:53:44] But the blinking light thing is even weirder to me

[00:53:46] because that means there's an electrical shortout going on.

[00:53:50] Everything's on the fritz.

[00:53:51] Like, what the fuck?

[00:53:53] And no one's saying anything.

[00:53:55] Right.

[00:53:56] And then I think, how long are they going to keep doing this?

[00:53:58] And then they'll hope we all just forget about it.

[00:54:00] Which we will till the next time.

[00:54:02] Right.

[00:54:03] Um...

[00:54:03] But it's not even going out of the news cycle.

[00:54:06] Um...

[00:54:07] Right.

[00:54:07] And a lot of people...

[00:54:08] One guy had a drone, and his drone, when it approached the drone, lost all power and crashed.

[00:54:14] So what kind of power do these things have?

[00:54:16] Are they hunting for a...

[00:54:18] What do they call it?

[00:54:19] A dirty bomb?

[00:54:20] Or...

[00:54:21] Huh?

[00:54:21] Bigfoot?

[00:54:22] Yeah.

[00:54:22] He'll know better.

[00:54:25] Um...

[00:54:25] These things are huge.

[00:54:27] Also, where are they being launched from?

[00:54:29] I'm just throwing out questions, termites, for ideas.

[00:54:32] I like it.

[00:54:33] Where are they being launched from?

[00:54:35] How come no one is seeing them being launched?

[00:54:37] Right.

[00:54:37] Is it a military base?

[00:54:39] If this is all a military exercise, just say so.

[00:54:42] There are stealth bombers in Missouri all the time.

[00:54:45] Patrick took a picture of one the other day.

[00:54:46] He's like, not a drone, but it is a stealth bomber.

[00:54:49] And those do go on routing things a lot.

[00:54:51] It's not uncommon.

[00:54:54] Right.

[00:54:55] Um...

[00:54:55] They don't give off heat.

[00:54:57] Weird.

[00:54:58] Regular drones do.

[00:55:00] Um...

[00:55:00] They don't give off heat.

[00:55:01] Nope.

[00:55:02] And then, um...

[00:55:05] Somebody...

[00:55:05] This one guy said he didn't think anything of it.

[00:55:09] Um...

[00:55:10] Uh...

[00:55:10] And then he thought it could be pranksters.

[00:55:13] Do you know how much a drone cost?

[00:55:15] Yeah.

[00:55:16] Okay, I went...

[00:55:16] One time, while this house was being built,

[00:55:19] I stayed in Ron White's fancy house in Atlanta for like...

[00:55:22] He let me stay there for like a month.

[00:55:24] It was fabulous.

[00:55:26] Oh my God.

[00:55:27] It's just so fabulous to me.

[00:55:28] Is he on a golf course?

[00:55:29] He's on a golf course.

[00:55:30] And he told them I'd be down every day.

[00:55:32] And I was.

[00:55:33] And they just let me go.

[00:55:34] And I go, if I come first, can I just go first, first?

[00:55:36] And they were like, yeah.

[00:55:37] He's like, darling, I'm gonna call you my little do-sweeper.

[00:55:40] Oh!

[00:55:41] Oh!

[00:55:41] How cute!

[00:55:42] And then if I didn't show up, he's like, where was my do-sweeper?

[00:55:44] I missed you.

[00:55:46] But anyway, I was gonna buy Ron a drone as a thank you.

[00:55:50] Because my idea was, he lived in this place,

[00:55:53] and he had a neighbor that was like maybe 10 houses down

[00:55:58] that was his weed friend.

[00:56:00] They loved to get high.

[00:56:01] I was gonna get him a drone.

[00:56:02] Well, I did.

[00:56:03] And then I thought he could tape a joint to the bottom of it,

[00:56:07] land it in that guy's yard as a little present.

[00:56:09] Oh, how fun!

[00:56:10] Right?

[00:56:10] Maybe a little pill bottle full of weed.

[00:56:12] You know, like something, like fun.

[00:56:14] Yeah.

[00:56:14] Like Ron likes to do weird stuff.

[00:56:16] He's not super technologically talented.

[00:56:21] But he has people.

[00:56:21] But he's got, the children will come over and help.

[00:56:24] He'll call one of the children.

[00:56:27] And I went to go drone shopping.

[00:56:29] No idea.

[00:56:30] The cheapest one that functioned was like 1,200 bucks.

[00:56:35] Wow!

[00:56:35] Oh, yeah, they go up to five grand in Best Buy.

[00:56:37] Wow!

[00:56:38] So this thing, now the one I'm talking about was tiny.

[00:56:41] Like the size of a dinner plate, maybe bigger.

[00:56:45] The $1,200 one.

[00:56:47] I mean, to get one the size of an SUV?

[00:56:49] So it's not pranksters.

[00:56:50] No!

[00:56:51] Jesus!

[00:56:52] No!

[00:56:52] I mean, there's certain things we can rule out.

[00:56:55] That's crazy.

[00:56:56] And if it's not our military, that's even more scary.

[00:56:59] Yes.

[00:57:00] And then why aren't they...

[00:57:01] Well, why aren't they stopping and coming...

[00:57:05] Well, I don't think...

[00:57:06] Somebody said they're manned.

[00:57:07] And a government official said they're manned.

[00:57:09] And then somebody else said they're not.

[00:57:10] I don't think there's people in them unless they're the tiniest alien people ever.

[00:57:13] In which case, I will be a giant!

[00:57:15] You will!

[00:57:16] Finally!

[00:57:18] Giantism!

[00:57:18] It's been going on since November 18th.

[00:57:21] Um...

[00:57:22] If it's Iran or China or some adversary force, where is the warship that they're leaving off of?

[00:57:30] They have to be being launched.

[00:57:32] They're not flying across the flipping ocean.

[00:57:34] Wait!

[00:57:36] That's crazy.

[00:57:37] Moving on.

[00:57:39] Kentucky?

[00:57:41] This is why I love you, Kentucky.

[00:57:43] Video shows western Kentucky man leading police on slow...

[00:57:48] A low-grade chase on his mule.

[00:57:52] What the...

[00:57:53] Yep.

[00:57:54] Callaway County residents did a double-take on Monday.

[00:57:57] What appeared to be a police chase involving a mule.

[00:58:00] Huh.

[00:58:01] And he saddled up this mule.

[00:58:03] It's got a great saddle on it.

[00:58:04] The mirrored police was part of the set of started around 915 on Saturday at Tap 216 in

[00:58:09] Neighborhood Bar and Grill.

[00:58:10] According to documents, the owner told the officers that 40-year-old Jonathan Mason

[00:58:14] arrived at the bar already drinking on a mule.

[00:58:19] Now, see, this is something...

[00:58:21] Oh, the mule!

[00:58:22] I'll bet you Jonathan doesn't seem like the type of man that would have Googled this before

[00:58:26] he left his house.

[00:58:28] Can I drink and ride a mule?

[00:58:29] I don't see why not.

[00:58:31] Huh.

[00:58:32] Yeah.

[00:58:33] Why not?

[00:58:33] It's not a motorized vehicle.

[00:58:35] True.

[00:58:38] 11 ways you could get a DUI in Kentucky without being behind the wheel.

[00:58:41] I didn't click on that.

[00:58:42] While inside, Mason was allegedly whipping a bullwhip at patrons.

[00:58:48] A bullwhip!

[00:58:49] There was this old comedian, like, I don't know what he was.

[00:58:52] He wasn't really a comedian, I don't know, and he had a bullwhip.

[00:58:54] And if you've ever seen one up close, that is a thick-ass piece of thing to be whipped

[00:58:58] at you as a joke in a bar.

[00:58:59] Yeah.

[00:59:00] And it's gonna hurt like hell.

[00:59:02] He was asked to leave after whipping his whip around.

[00:59:04] Yeah, of course he was.

[00:59:05] And he refused.

[00:59:06] Wow.

[00:59:06] Officers encountered him outside per court documents where he had tied up his mule and

[00:59:11] was attempting to leave.

[00:59:12] They noted that he was unsteady on his feet, smelled strongly of alcohol, and was manifestly

[00:59:16] under the influence.

[00:59:17] Upon speaking to the owner of a nearby cafe, officers learned that Mason reportedly rode

[00:59:22] his mule 15 miles into town to, quote, break him in.

[00:59:33] The more Mason becomes intoxicated, the worse he treats his horses, said the local cafe person.

[00:59:43] He was arrested and charged with second-degree disorderly conduct, alcohol intoxication in

[00:59:48] a public place, and third-degree criminal trespassing and resisting arrest.

[00:59:52] He was lodged in Calloway County Jail, but records show he was released on bond on Sunday

[00:59:56] in order to stay away from TAP 260 in the bar and to stay away from the mule.

[01:00:02] Specifically.

[01:00:04] But around 1251, the following day, Murray Police reportedly received a call that an intoxicated

[01:00:11] man was riding a mule in the area where Masons had been stabled.

[01:00:15] The department said he refused to stop for officers and fled.

[01:00:19] This is the next day.

[01:00:20] On the mule.

[01:00:21] Wow.

[01:00:23] Wow.

[01:00:23] Video from bystanders shows a man riding a white mule galloping down the road, weaving

[01:00:27] through road work cones, and tipping his hat to the locals.

[01:00:35] Oh.

[01:00:37] After a brief chase, he was arrested and lodged in the Calloway County Jail on third-degree

[01:00:42] fleeing and evading police and second-degree cruelty to animal charges.

[01:00:46] Wow.

[01:00:47] I don't want him to be mean to the mule, but...

[01:00:49] The mule chase.

[01:00:51] That's funny.

[01:00:52] That's ridiculous.

[01:00:53] News!

[01:00:55] Oh, Netflix.

[01:00:58] Netflix has secured approval to build a $903 million production facility in New Jersey.

[01:01:04] Maybe Netflix is sending the drones to make sure that their area is safe.

[01:01:10] I know.

[01:01:11] It's a stupid reach.

[01:01:12] It's okay.

[01:01:13] I like it.

[01:01:14] They're going to build a $900 million production facility in New Jersey, transforming the former

[01:01:19] Fort Monmouth site into a major hub for film and TV production.

[01:01:23] The initial phase includes four sound stages spread across 29 acres in Oceanport and Eatontown,

[01:01:29] offering secure accommodations for actors and crews.

[01:01:32] Good.

[01:01:33] Good.

[01:01:33] Good for the actors and everybody.

[01:01:35] Everybody's going to get something going there.

[01:01:37] Yeah.

[01:01:39] YouTube.

[01:01:41] TV.

[01:01:43] Yeah, I saw that.

[01:01:45] Like my brother said, fuck it, let's go back to cable.

[01:01:49] They are raising their rates again.

[01:01:51] For football, if you have the...

[01:01:53] So there's YouTube TV, you got to pay for that.

[01:01:55] Then there's a separate YouTube...

[01:01:57] The add-on.

[01:01:58] The add-on is if you want every football game, which I do, which every person who's playing

[01:02:02] fantasy football would like.

[01:02:04] Thankfully, I forgot to have children.

[01:02:05] I have the $82.

[01:02:07] Right.

[01:02:07] Well, it was $72.

[01:02:09] For the playoffs, they've raised it $10 a pop.

[01:02:13] A pop.

[01:02:14] A month.

[01:02:15] So every single person...

[01:02:17] A $10 increase is a lot across the board.

[01:02:20] Think how much money they're going to make.

[01:02:21] Especially when it started at...

[01:02:23] Right.

[01:02:23] It started at $10.

[01:02:25] Or $30, I thought.

[01:02:27] $38?

[01:02:28] Yeah.

[01:02:28] It was a week.

[01:02:29] Right.

[01:02:30] Well, you try to sneak that through.

[01:02:32] Paddles.

[01:02:32] No, no.

[01:02:33] Don't be giving bullshit.

[01:02:34] We're not a source of disinformation.

[01:02:36] No, no.

[01:02:36] That Kentucky mule store is 100% true.

[01:02:38] You're wearing a beaver outfit.

[01:02:43] It's a beaver outfit.

[01:02:44] It's more comfortable than people wear.

[01:02:47] And I'm not allergic to it.

[01:02:48] It has no...

[01:02:49] I can't.

[01:02:50] Thank you, seriously.

[01:02:50] It's got...

[01:02:51] No, no.

[01:02:51] It's got a giant...

[01:02:52] Zero formaldehyde.

[01:02:53] You've got a beaver tooth off your eyes.

[01:02:54] I'm sure it's not fire retardant.

[01:02:58] I'm sure I could burst into flames at any moment.

[01:03:00] Probably just lighten this lighter.

[01:03:02] I'd burn in...

[01:03:02] Those candles are lit.

[01:03:03] Yeah.

[01:03:04] They are.

[01:03:06] I cut the wick, so...

[01:03:07] Cord cutters fuming over YouTube TV price hike, but streaming inflation is here to stay.

[01:03:13] Remember all the money you were going to save by canceling your cable TV subscription?

[01:03:16] Cord cutters are, again, dealing with the reality.

[01:03:18] Here's what I don't like about streaming.

[01:03:20] Because I had to rent a bunch of condos because I didn't have a house at the time in the Ozarks

[01:03:25] for all those times with my dad.

[01:03:27] Well, the people that have streaming, I have to sign into my shit to watch TV.

[01:03:32] And I don't remember all that off the top of my head.

[01:03:34] Then I got to go get my phone.

[01:03:35] And then depending on their remote, it could be slow as...

[01:03:40] It takes forever.

[01:03:42] What happened?

[01:03:43] I don't know.

[01:03:43] Anyway, cord cutters are, again, dealing with the reality of rising programming costs.

[01:03:47] After YouTube TV told subscribers their monthly fee will go up by 14%.

[01:03:52] 14?

[01:03:53] Yep.

[01:03:53] Starting in January to $82.99.

[01:03:57] So, together, I'm paying about $170 with tax for YouTube TV and football.

[01:04:05] And then I have to remember to cancel it.

[01:04:07] The football part.

[01:04:09] Which, of course, I don't remember.

[01:04:10] That's a lot.

[01:04:10] Until March when I'm bored of no football.

[01:04:17] Somebody wrote,

[01:04:18] I'm so glad I made the right financial decision in 2018 and ditched my $89 cable package so

[01:04:23] I can now pay $83 for YouTube, $23 for Netflix, $16 for Disney, $13 for Paramount, $15 for

[01:04:30] Prime, and $10 for Apple TV, and $21 for HBO.

[01:04:34] I mean, we just got hoodwinked.

[01:04:36] I'm going to do the math for you.

[01:04:38] I know.

[01:04:38] I don't even want to know what I spent.

[01:04:40] Because I have DirecTV because I understand that system better.

[01:04:43] You still have DirecTV?

[01:04:44] Yeah, I still have DirecTV, too.

[01:04:46] So throw the ad on there.

[01:04:47] You have YouTube TV?

[01:04:48] Yeah, I have YouTube TV, too.

[01:04:50] Well, I had to get to football.

[01:04:53] And I have Amazon because I'm on it.

[01:04:56] I got to check and see how my special's doing.

[01:04:59] Everybody has to watch it twice.

[01:05:01] Yeah, everybody go watch Hunting Bigfoot.

[01:05:03] And Netflix, my last special's on that.

[01:05:06] You're on that.

[01:05:07] No, I mean, I enjoy them.

[01:05:08] Aside, obviously, I'm kidding about my own shit.

[01:05:10] But I do like watching their shows.

[01:05:13] But I kept selling everybody.

[01:05:15] We're getting hoodwinked here because my brother's like, I'm cutting the cord.

[01:05:18] And this whole family, blah, blah, blah.

[01:05:21] Okay, you're going to be the pioneer, Pat.

[01:05:23] Okay, pioneer, Pat.

[01:05:25] Let me know how it works out.

[01:05:26] Now he's probably paying $500 a month for all this shit.

[01:05:29] That's hilarious.

[01:05:29] Yeah.

[01:05:30] Yeah.

[01:05:30] It was fine when the kids were little because all they cared about was cartoons.

[01:05:34] So whatever one that is, Disney or whatever.

[01:05:37] That's why I couldn't spend more than an hour.

[01:05:39] I don't think parents with little kids realize the sounds cartoons make because it's background

[01:05:44] noise to them.

[01:05:45] After a while, they just become oblivious to it.

[01:05:47] I walk in.

[01:05:48] I literally feel like I've checked into a mental institution and no one will turn off

[01:05:51] the music.

[01:05:55] And it's so fucking loud.

[01:05:57] I'm like, Patrick.

[01:05:59] Yeah.

[01:05:59] Heart it down.

[01:06:00] Oh, shit, man.

[01:06:01] Is that bothering you?

[01:06:02] It should bother you.

[01:06:03] What has happened to your brains?

[01:06:06] Bring your children.

[01:06:08] TV.

[01:06:09] YouTube TV.

[01:06:10] Post information.

[01:06:12] They acknowledge it.

[01:06:13] Here's the thing, too.

[01:06:14] I think people that have normal regular job, you know, to regular people that work somebody

[01:06:22] in that relationship most likely, most likely is not going to be a fantasy football player

[01:06:29] and get mad at the other one and say, we are now let's call it $100.

[01:06:35] It's $1,200 a year for you to flip and play fantasy football because you need to see every

[01:06:39] game.

[01:06:39] If you didn't need to see every game, you could just bug around and try to find it's all bullshit

[01:06:45] because of Roger Goodell.

[01:06:46] And this, I don't even know how basketball fits into all this.

[01:06:50] I don't really watch, but baseball, I know I buy the MLB package to watch the Cardinals,

[01:06:54] but I'm not doing that this year.

[01:06:56] I'm boycotting.

[01:06:58] But somebody's $1,200 a year is a lot.

[01:07:01] It's a mini vacation somewhere fun.

[01:07:05] I just, I hope people kind of say, fuck them.

[01:07:10] We are subsidizing their bad decision to buy an NFL Sunday ticket, somebody wrote.

[01:07:15] Yeah.

[01:07:16] Yes.

[01:07:17] YouTube parent Google agreed to pay the NFL $2.5 billion a year to get the package, billion,

[01:07:24] out of, uh, out of the, out of market Sunday games in 2023.

[01:07:28] The figure is $1 billion above what previous carrier DirecTV paid because I had it on DirecTV,

[01:07:33] which at least made it because you could call DirecTV and say, I'm going to cancel all of it.

[01:07:37] And then they'd lower that football amount.

[01:07:41] Yeah.

[01:07:42] Yeah.

[01:07:43] Yeah.

[01:07:43] Dishonesty.

[01:07:44] Well, I was thinking about it.

[01:07:46] Wasn't a total lie, more of a threat than a lie.

[01:07:50] Um, so everybody else is raising them too.

[01:07:54] Here's who else is going up.

[01:07:56] Disney plus Hulu ESPN, Disney's Hulu live TV bundle.

[01:08:01] Um, uh, which includes live channels and three Disney.

[01:08:05] So if you want to get that Disney plus Hulu plus blah, blah, it's priced at 82 a month.

[01:08:10] I just, I don't know.

[01:08:12] I think eventually people will turn on this.

[01:08:16] 2 billion.

[01:08:17] I 1 billion billions.

[01:08:19] It's ridiculous.

[01:08:20] Um, speaking of what the hell is going on here.

[01:08:24] Say it properly.

[01:08:26] Say it Midwest.

[01:08:28] What the hell's going on.

[01:08:30] What the hell's going on here?

[01:08:32] Um, Twitter and blue sky.

[01:08:35] I won't go deep into this cause I know a lot of people don't care.

[01:08:39] Blue sky is supposed to be the alternative to Twitter.

[01:08:43] I refuse to say X, which I just did, but, uh, there are a lot of people leaving X.

[01:08:48] I see it in my followers and I'm staying to the bitter end.

[01:08:51] I want to see.

[01:08:52] You also kind of have to.

[01:08:54] But I have to for work and I do there.

[01:08:56] I have met a lot of good people on there.

[01:08:58] Um, and actually met them in person.

[01:08:59] Like it's not just some bullshit thing.

[01:09:01] It's time for some eggnog.

[01:09:03] Hold on a minute.

[01:09:04] It's well, I don't like it when it settles like this.

[01:09:06] I have to start.

[01:09:06] Then you lose the creamy taste and then nutmeg goes to the bottom.

[01:09:12] So yeah, Twitter's Twitter's traffic appears to be falling off a cliff.

[01:09:18] Read it and weep Elon.

[01:09:20] So it's a whole story.

[01:09:22] I don't need to go into the details that they want us to go to blue sky.

[01:09:26] I don't think he cares.

[01:09:27] I think he bought it to wreck it.

[01:09:28] It's Florence and the machine songs build a ship to wreck.

[01:09:31] I think that's exactly what he did.

[01:09:33] I don't know why one would want to do that, but what does it matter?

[01:09:36] Because Trump, he got elected.

[01:09:37] And Trump Soros, Elon doubled his wealth.

[01:09:40] Yeah.

[01:09:41] So, I mean, when we're talking, you have 400 billion.

[01:09:44] What do you give a shit about 50 million?

[01:09:46] If you want to wreck it.

[01:09:48] So they're telling everybody go to blue sky.

[01:09:50] Well, here's the thing about blue sky.

[01:09:52] If anybody's listening, you can't post a video more than one minute long.

[01:09:55] Now, for musicians and comedians and entertainer people, we need to do that a lot.

[01:10:02] Well, we want to do it.

[01:10:04] I mean, the joke is a minute and four seconds.

[01:10:06] Let it go.

[01:10:06] Let it ride.

[01:10:07] Until they fix that, I think they're going to have a problem with people frequently using it.

[01:10:15] I'm on it.

[01:10:16] I've signed up.

[01:10:17] I think it's official Kathleen Madigan or Kathleen Madigan.

[01:10:20] It's Kathleen Madigan.

[01:10:20] Kathleen Madigan.

[01:10:21] Yeah.

[01:10:22] And then people are like, what if there's other ones?

[01:10:23] Well, you should know the difference.

[01:10:26] Read the feed.

[01:10:28] Go through their feed.

[01:10:29] Do you see Baby Cat?

[01:10:30] If you do not, you are on the wrong Kathleen Madigan.

[01:10:32] That's how I can tell you that.

[01:10:35] But blue sky's thing is increasing big time.

[01:10:38] People are going.

[01:10:40] Maybe if they could work out the kinks.

[01:10:41] That is ironically owned by Jack Dorsey, who invented Twitter.

[01:10:45] One of St. Louis's finest.

[01:10:50] This is so funny.

[01:10:54] How scientists taught monkeys the concept of money.

[01:10:57] Not long after, the first prostitute monkey appeared.

[01:11:01] What did you just say?

[01:11:02] What did you just say?

[01:11:04] Yeah.

[01:11:05] A hooker monkey.

[01:11:05] A hooker monkey.

[01:11:07] I want to know how she thought of it first.

[01:11:09] I assume it's a girl.

[01:11:10] Could be a guy.

[01:11:11] You may have thought of things like currency or money or concepts known solely to humans.

[01:11:15] While it's true some animals have a sense of ownership, trading resources hasn't been observed in any other species besides people.

[01:11:21] However, in 2005, an economist-psychologist duo from Yale University managed to save seven Chapin monkeys.

[01:11:30] To teach, sorry.

[01:11:31] Seven Chapin monkeys how to use money.

[01:11:34] The study went into some unexpected territory not long after.

[01:11:38] The Chapin, I'm saying it wrong.

[01:11:40] Chopin.

[01:11:40] Chapin.

[01:11:41] Chapin.

[01:11:42] Chapin.

[01:11:43] Chapin.

[01:11:43] It has a small brain.

[01:11:45] It's pretty much focused on food and sex.

[01:11:48] You should think of these monkeys as a bottomless stomach of want.

[01:11:52] When you feed them marshmallows all day, they'll throw up and come back for more.

[01:11:55] Oh, wow.

[01:11:56] He's got like one of those human faces, too.

[01:11:58] He looks crazy real.

[01:12:00] Mm-hmm.

[01:12:02] It's exactly these selfish desires that they tried to exploit and experiment with great success after teaching the monkeys to buy grapes, apples, and jellos.

[01:12:10] The economist wanted to study the incentives that motivated specimens to behave in a way while the psychologist analyzed the behavior itself.

[01:12:17] The monkey's correlations to human economics go further back when a Harvard graduate.

[01:12:24] He worked on a different thing.

[01:12:25] Sometimes he's too long.

[01:12:27] Mm-hmm.

[01:12:27] Mm-hmm.

[01:12:29] All that.

[01:12:33] It's how they—see, sometimes these science articles.

[01:12:36] Like, just get to the point.

[01:12:38] It's just blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[01:12:40] They taught him all kinds of things.

[01:12:42] And then each monkey was eventually given 12 tokens to decide how to spend its money on food valued at different prices.

[01:12:49] Monkeys could even budget.

[01:12:51] Oh.

[01:12:51] Researchers then changed the market and put jello at a lower price to see if the monkeys would buy fewer grapes and more jello.

[01:12:57] They acted exactly like the current laws of economics dictate for humans as well.

[01:13:01] Oh.

[01:13:02] See, this is how you get the movie Monkey Chines.

[01:13:04] They're way, way smarter than they appear.

[01:13:06] Yeah.

[01:13:06] And you have to be careful what you teach them.

[01:13:08] Mm-hmm.

[01:13:09] Yeah.

[01:13:12] Then they taught him how to gamble.

[01:13:14] And they saw them make the same irrational decisions a human gambler could make.

[01:13:17] That makes me feel better.

[01:13:20] Yeah.

[01:13:20] The data generated by the monkeys, Chen says, make them indistinguishable from most stock market investors.

[01:13:31] Oh.

[01:13:31] Mm-hmm.

[01:13:35] They even understood that food sometimes was better than the other food.

[01:13:38] There was stealing, too.

[01:13:40] So crime started.

[01:13:41] Not a single monkey saved any of the tokens, but most of them tried to subtract a few more tokens when they were handed out.

[01:13:47] They tried to steal tokens.

[01:13:49] They were given tokens one at a time, which were inserted into a separate chamber from their living quarters.

[01:13:53] But on one occasion, everything sprung into chaos when a monkey tried to make a run for it with the trays filled with the tokens.

[01:13:59] He tried to steal all the tokens.

[01:14:00] Oh, my God.

[01:14:01] The chaos was intense.

[01:14:03] This was a tough time for researchers.

[01:14:05] That's kind of true.

[01:14:07] They understood that you could exchange their tokens for goods and services.

[01:14:10] During the chaotic episode mentioned earlier, one of the monkeys exchanged money with another for sex.

[01:14:17] After the act was over, the monkey, which was paid immediately, used it to buy a grape.

[01:14:23] Poor lady.

[01:14:28] Grape.

[01:14:36] Grape equals vodka.

[01:14:38] Well, to the monk, the rapist, to go, if I give her, is he a rapist anymore or is he just a customer?

[01:14:45] Right.

[01:14:46] Speaking of the Wizard of Oz, which I never saw, the slippers sell at auction.

[01:14:55] They sold for $28 million.

[01:14:57] What?

[01:14:58] The ruby slippers.

[01:14:59] The ones that were featured in the film.

[01:15:02] A pair of Judy Garland slippers from the Wizard of Oz were stolen.

[01:15:05] They were stolen 20 years ago, but the guy returned them.

[01:15:07] But they still sent them to jail.

[01:15:09] We talked about it.

[01:15:09] Yeah.

[01:15:10] Well, they sold for $28 million.

[01:15:12] The pair, one of the four surviving pairs, Garland, Warland, the film is the most valuable memorabilia and ever sold at auction.

[01:15:18] There is simply no comparison between Judy Garland's red slippers and any other piece of Hollywood memorabilia.

[01:15:23] The breathtaking results reflects how important movies and movie memorabilia are to our culture and to our collectors.

[01:15:27] While the auction house commissions, with the auction house commissions, the slippers price was a staggering $32.5 million, nearly 11 times what the auction house says with their pre-auction estimate of $3 million.

[01:15:41] Wow.

[01:15:41] Other pairs have been sent to auction before, but none sold for nearly as much as one.

[01:15:46] She should have saved a pair and then given them to Liza and then Liza could cash them in right now.

[01:15:55] No.

[01:15:56] Yeah.

[01:15:56] You got it.

[01:15:57] There's four pairs.

[01:15:58] You should be able to get one if you're her.

[01:16:01] In 2000, one of the pairs auctioned off for $666,000.

[01:16:05] Ooh, what an evil little number.

[01:16:06] According to it, years later, Steven Spielberg and Leonardo DiCaprio bought a different pair for $2 million and donated them to the Academy of Music of Motion Pictures in Los Angeles.

[01:16:15] Good for them.

[01:16:16] Wow.

[01:16:16] Great.

[01:16:17] Good.

[01:16:17] Go buy it and donate it.

[01:16:20] Yeah.

[01:16:21] What are you going to?

[01:16:22] That's $28 million and they don't say who bought them.

[01:16:26] Because they don't want to do it.

[01:16:28] Well, nobody wants to be, yeah, they don't want to get stolen.

[01:16:30] I know.

[01:16:32] All right.

[01:16:33] Let me see.

[01:16:34] I have my, okay, I want to save the DNA one for next week.

[01:16:39] Okay.

[01:16:41] I'm going to do the feel good story.

[01:16:44] This is so great.

[01:16:45] This is why I love Charles Barkley.

[01:16:48] Hold on.

[01:16:48] He's awesome.

[01:16:50] He's also a friend of Snoop's.

[01:16:51] He's a friend of Snoop's?

[01:16:53] He was a friend of my friend, Vic Henley, too.

[01:16:55] Really?

[01:16:55] Yep.

[01:16:56] Vic Henley had nothing but wonderful things to say about.

[01:16:58] Cool.

[01:16:58] Yeah.

[01:16:59] And I saw him on a plane once and I thought, should I say something?

[01:17:01] I thought, well, Vic says they're BFFs.

[01:17:04] Oh, not BFFs, but buddies.

[01:17:05] Yeah.

[01:17:06] I said, hey, Mr. Barkley, I'm a friend of Vic Henley.

[01:17:08] He's like, no kidding.

[01:17:09] Where has Vic been at?

[01:17:11] I hadn't seen him in a while.

[01:17:12] You always saw him at the Auburn games.

[01:17:13] But anyway, Vic had nothing but rave reviews.

[01:17:16] And I love his commentary.

[01:17:17] And I love everything about Charles.

[01:17:19] I wish he would run for office.

[01:17:21] He says he's threatened a few times.

[01:17:23] And then, but not just in Alabama.

[01:17:26] You don't need to just be down there.

[01:17:27] Come Nashville.

[01:17:28] Go, go, go, go Nashville, Charles.

[01:17:30] Charles Barkley buys entire bar drinks after local hockey college teams win.

[01:17:35] You guys have been amazing.

[01:17:36] For the next five songs, all drinks are free at the bar.

[01:17:42] Can you imagine if you're a college kid with no money?

[01:17:44] You'd be like, this is the greatest night of my life.

[01:17:47] How did we end up here?

[01:17:49] The next round is on NBA legend Charles Barkley.

[01:17:52] Barkley, 61, earned the love of Fredonia, New York, after he bought drinks for an entire local bar over the weekend after attending a college hockey game.

[01:17:59] I wonder why he went.

[01:18:01] On Friday, December 6th, the NBA on TNT co-hosts watched the SUNY Fredonia men's hockey team win over Plattsburgh State and then celebrated at the bar.

[01:18:11] The village of Fredonia Police Department posted slam dunk for the night shift.

[01:18:16] Our officers met NBA legend Charles Barkley, a true gentleman and supporter of local law enforcement.

[01:18:23] That's awesome.

[01:18:24] Yeah.

[01:18:25] I wonder what.

[01:18:30] He said, I went to the game tonight.

[01:18:32] They won two to zip, Charles said to the cheers to the crowd.

[01:18:36] I've never been to Fredonia State before.

[01:18:38] You guys have been amazing.

[01:18:39] So for me, we're going to play some music that I listen to right now for the next five songs for the next all drinks are free at the bar.

[01:18:45] He was in town to do the puck drop for the start of the game, which is part of the Fredonia's alumni weekend.

[01:18:50] That it won't.

[01:18:51] But this.

[01:18:52] Why was he there?

[01:18:53] He's not even part of them.

[01:18:55] Right.

[01:18:56] It's the first time back in August.

[01:18:58] He revealed that he left a staggering hundred million dollars on the table to stay with Turner Sports so that TNT employees could keep their jobs.

[01:19:06] Yeah.

[01:19:06] He's just a wonderful person.

[01:19:08] Good human.

[01:19:09] Maybe he'll run.

[01:19:10] Could we all agree?

[01:19:10] He says he's a Republican.

[01:19:12] Fine.

[01:19:12] Let's do it.

[01:19:13] Yeah.

[01:19:14] Mm hmm.

[01:19:16] He may have said he's nothing anymore.

[01:19:18] I don't remember.

[01:19:19] Anyway.

[01:19:20] A lot of people are switching.

[01:19:22] Couple thank yous.

[01:19:23] Yeah.

[01:19:23] A lot of people are jumping many ships.

[01:19:28] By the way, if you've seen Hunting Bigfoot, my special, I do a little thing about aging politicians.

[01:19:33] Mitch McConnell fell down at lunch and fell on his face and then his wrist was broken and he came out with a big bandage on his head.

[01:19:40] Nancy Pelosi, 80, also something over in Europe, fell down a flight of Marvel steps.

[01:19:45] She had to be rushed somewhere.

[01:19:46] I mean, come on, people.

[01:19:49] Go home.

[01:19:49] Oh, God.

[01:19:51] Just a couple thank yous.

[01:19:53] My pickleball ornament.

[01:19:55] It's already on my tree.

[01:19:57] That's from Cynthia Todd and Kevin.

[01:20:00] And a Canada Flask for you.

[01:20:02] Yeah.

[01:20:03] Paddles.

[01:20:03] I saw it.

[01:20:03] I'm so happy.

[01:20:04] It's very nice.

[01:20:05] Yeah.

[01:20:05] Yeah.

[01:20:07] Paraboo socks.

[01:20:08] Great cat treat.

[01:20:09] They needed treats, too.

[01:20:11] That's from Cindy Roger and their cat, Star Cray Cray.

[01:20:15] Their cats, Star.

[01:20:18] Cray Cray.

[01:20:18] And Cray Cray.

[01:20:19] Oh, Star and Cray Cray.

[01:20:21] I get it.

[01:20:21] Okay.

[01:20:21] It was written out wrong.

[01:20:22] My adult sippy wine cup right here that goes with my joke, which is coming true.

[01:20:27] It's got a straw.

[01:20:27] The twins can drive now.

[01:20:29] My old joke is coming true.

[01:20:30] It's a sippy cup for wine in the back seat.

[01:20:32] Yeah.

[01:20:32] Because they have a new little car and I'm not supposed to get it dirty.

[01:20:36] Oh.

[01:20:36] Yeah.

[01:20:37] Oh.

[01:20:37] Yeah.

[01:20:38] Well, you got a straw now.

[01:20:41] I can't believe that joke was that long ago and that people still remember it.

[01:20:44] It was about installing a car seat and then me wanting to ride around when I'm old, which

[01:20:50] I have become.

[01:20:52] Now they're old enough to drive me around.

[01:20:54] It's so great to have designated drivers who have no plans because they're only 16.

[01:20:57] Yeah.

[01:20:57] No plans.

[01:20:58] They're going to go to a hockey or a football game on a Friday.

[01:21:01] This lady wrote this.

[01:21:02] This is very funny.

[01:21:05] I've been listening to podcasts since the beginning.

[01:21:07] I've started re-listening to previous episodes of my drive to and from work.

[01:21:10] Listening to story time.

[01:21:11] I know people want me to do that again.

[01:21:13] I just, I can't yet.

[01:21:14] I'll find a time.

[01:21:15] She's a transportation area manager for Retta.

[01:21:23] So what's this?

[01:21:23] So West Virginia termite.

[01:21:27] We are called TAMs.

[01:21:28] I also work nights.

[01:21:29] So sometimes it gets a bit slow.

[01:21:30] So one night I decided to look for a Stevie Nicks quote book because I've mentioned that.

[01:21:33] And there was none to be found.

[01:21:35] So she made one.

[01:21:36] That's awesome.

[01:21:37] Yeah.

[01:21:37] I wouldn't even know how to flip and do that.

[01:21:40] Um, uh, she said she's not really sure if these quotes are from the songs or not.

[01:21:46] She has no clue.

[01:21:46] I will know.

[01:21:48] Not all of them, but I will know.

[01:21:49] So thank you for your Retta.

[01:21:51] Let's read a Stevie quote.

[01:21:52] I can't wait.

[01:21:53] This book is so nice.

[01:21:55] Oh, don't be a lady.

[01:21:57] Be a legend.

[01:21:59] Yes.

[01:21:59] Yes.

[01:21:59] Yes.

[01:22:00] I like it.

[01:22:00] Um, that's, I don't think that's from a song.

[01:22:05] I have my own life and I am stronger than, you know, what's that from?

[01:22:10] I know I have my own life and I am stronger than, you know, it's leather and lace.

[01:22:23] It's leather and lace.

[01:22:30] Well, these are great.

[01:22:32] There's another one.

[01:22:33] I'm going to see right next.

[01:22:34] It's wonderful.

[01:22:35] And then we're going to do a quote by Cher.

[01:22:37] Yeah.

[01:22:39] I wonder what she's doing for the holidays.

[01:22:40] Does she still have that boyfriend?

[01:22:42] She got to go to his house.

[01:22:43] Wouldn't that be weird?

[01:22:44] One of the termites asked if you have Christmas in Canada.

[01:22:50] No, by the way, speaking of Canada, it is.

[01:22:55] There's Christians there.

[01:22:56] Yes, of course they have Canada.

[01:22:57] They do not have the same Thanksgiving.

[01:22:59] My sister went to school in Ireland for a while and she called them.

[01:23:02] She's like, do you know, they don't even celebrate Thanksgiving in Ireland.

[01:23:06] I'm like, yeah, I'd heard that.

[01:23:07] Yeah.

[01:23:08] I just say shit like, yeah, I'd heard that.

[01:23:11] But wait, speaking of Canada, it looks like super smoking hot Justin Trudeau might be ousted.

[01:23:18] Yeah.

[01:23:19] Getting hotter.

[01:23:20] Is the next person hot?

[01:23:22] Not like him.

[01:23:23] Not like him.

[01:23:24] How could you be?

[01:23:25] His hair is just top his hair.

[01:23:28] I'll show you later.

[01:23:29] Although I watched the 60 Minutes or the whatever, CBS Sunday morning.

[01:23:34] Thank you, Lewis, for keeping that on my television.

[01:23:36] About restoring Notre Dame, Notre Dame, if you will.

[01:23:40] And Macron was on there and he is just the pocket smoking hot guy.

[01:23:46] But Justin's got better hair.

[01:23:48] All right.

[01:23:49] That's my shallow input for the week as I finish my moonshine eggnog.

[01:23:58] That's a good one.

[01:24:04] Living your life the way you want to live it the most is the most important thing.

[01:24:08] So if you have to pay small prices along the way, it's not important.

[01:24:13] That's what I had to tell my brother once.

[01:24:16] Yeah.

[01:24:17] Pay the piper, man.

[01:24:18] Move on.

[01:24:19] If it's a price to pay, do you want to move on?

[01:24:21] Or do you want to stay still?

[01:24:23] You want to stay still and have your own little Irish standoff?

[01:24:25] I've been guilty of it before.

[01:24:27] Never works out.

[01:24:28] Just pay the toll.

[01:24:29] Move on.

[01:24:30] Keep going.

[01:24:31] All right, termites.

[01:24:32] Termites have asked what you're doing.

[01:24:34] What am I doing for Christmas?

[01:24:35] Well, I'm leaving Tennessee.

[01:24:38] And I'm going to Missouri.

[01:24:39] I'm going to the Chiefs game, which I thought was on Sunday, but is on Saturday.

[01:24:43] Oh, and my nieces and nephews are going.

[01:24:46] My friends are going.

[01:24:47] It's going to be a big old.

[01:24:48] Here's the thing about leaving a Chiefs game.

[01:24:51] I've never seen anything.

[01:24:52] So I can't call it dis or unorganized because that would imply that there had been some sort

[01:24:59] of organization.

[01:25:00] It's the deuce hazard.

[01:25:01] I am surprised more drunks aren't run over on a weekly basis leaving a Chiefs game

[01:25:06] because it's just through fields.

[01:25:07] We're all trying to get to this one highway and there's no cops.

[01:25:11] I'm like, what the fuck?

[01:25:13] It's madness.

[01:25:15] Sometimes you hope the Chiefs are winning by a shit ton just to get out of there early.

[01:25:18] Yeah.

[01:25:19] You don't.

[01:25:19] Sometimes I kind of root for not that great of a game because then I know what's going

[01:25:23] to happen afterwards.

[01:25:24] Anyway, and then I'm going down to the Altarks and hang out with my mom.

[01:25:29] It's going to be just, I have, she doesn't listen to this so I can say it.

[01:25:35] I took a picture of the shirt.

[01:25:36] It was a sweatshirt, a hoodie on Instagram and I sent it to all my siblings and I said,

[01:25:42] do you think I can give this to her on Christmas or do you think she'll take it the wrong way?

[01:25:46] And they all said, no, definitely give it to her.

[01:25:49] But I also think they're setting me up.

[01:25:51] I don't, I don't trust him.

[01:25:53] This shirt though is 1000% accurate for my mom.

[01:25:56] It says undiagnosed, but something ain't right.

[01:26:04] But there's a chance because my mom ain't right that she's going to take that literally.

[01:26:10] She can be very little.

[01:26:11] She does have a very good sense of humor, but she can also take things literally.

[01:26:15] And it's not been the year to hurt her feelings.

[01:26:18] No, no, no.

[01:26:19] You know, we can't.

[01:26:21] No year.

[01:26:22] Well, there's many years where it's open field.

[01:26:24] Nothing bad's happened.

[01:26:25] Everybody's allowed to be as smart assy as you want and just suck it up.

[01:26:29] Little soldier.

[01:26:30] Everybody's kidding.

[01:26:31] At the end of the day, learn how to take a joke.

[01:26:34] I don't know.

[01:26:35] I bought it.

[01:26:36] It's going to be a game time decision.

[01:26:38] I really think though my siblings might be setting me up.

[01:26:41] Take a picture.

[01:26:44] I, well, I think I, I feel her reaction will be, do you really think there's something not

[01:26:49] right about me?

[01:26:50] Well, you asked me when we were golfing, if you're autistic, if you have to ask people

[01:26:55] that there's a chance there's, there's a spectrum equality to you.

[01:27:00] Yeah.

[01:27:01] Yes.

[01:27:01] Mom, there's a spectrum-y something.

[01:27:04] Yeah.

[01:27:04] Are you great in an emergency?

[01:27:06] Best ever.

[01:27:07] Still lovable.

[01:27:08] Yep.

[01:27:08] Are you on a day to day basis?

[01:27:10] Probably not as good as in an emergency.

[01:27:12] Just saying.

[01:27:13] I don't know.

[01:27:14] It's going to be a game time decision.

[01:27:16] Did you fix her Apple watch?

[01:27:18] I did not fix her Apple watch.

[01:27:19] I fixed no Apple products.

[01:27:21] That was a, that phone call went on about her trying to print Amazon gift cards from

[01:27:25] an iPad to a 2022 computer that can't be hooked up to the iPad.

[01:27:29] That's probably from 1711.

[01:27:30] That iPad, the dog is eating it.

[01:27:33] The cover's eaten, but she doesn't want a new one.

[01:27:35] Oh, I don't want a new cover.

[01:27:36] I like this one.

[01:27:37] I'm like, Jesus, you look homeless.

[01:27:38] All right, whatever.

[01:27:39] Um, no, she knows.

[01:27:42] And then my sister told me on the down low, she goes, oh, I know how to do all of it,

[01:27:47] but I just say, I don't.

[01:27:52] Oh, I don't know how to do it.

[01:27:54] I don't know anything about iPhones.

[01:27:55] So she knows that I'm like, mom, we, you and I are going to live in the dark.

[01:28:00] We live in the 1600s.

[01:28:02] Um, because you're, if you call me, I can't help you.

[01:28:05] And I don't know how I could do it.

[01:28:07] If I was at her house with a computer, I could hook up a printer.

[01:28:09] I'm not that stupid, but, but I'm not that far behind, but I'm not downloading apps into

[01:28:14] an iPad to get a printer.

[01:28:17] I said, just email it to one of us and we will print it.

[01:28:20] She thinks they're gone.

[01:28:22] Gift cards.

[01:28:25] They're gone.

[01:28:26] Nevermind.

[01:28:26] They're not gone.

[01:28:28] Patrick looked.

[01:28:29] Joseph looked.

[01:28:30] You're in a cloud.

[01:28:31] Oh, don't even get started on a cloud.

[01:28:34] No.

[01:28:34] And then my dad would be like, what kind of asshole would put their shit in something

[01:28:39] called a cloud for them to take.

[01:28:41] I'm like, who's them?

[01:28:43] Who is them?

[01:28:45] Anybody that wants to build a case against you.

[01:28:47] He, I don't like the cloud either.

[01:28:49] Cause then you hear about some, I don't even have any naked pictures.

[01:28:52] I hope not.

[01:28:54] I don't, shouldn't.

[01:28:56] I would think you'd know, but I mean, I don't like that.

[01:29:00] Like the cloud part, every time there's some, um, Hollywood person, all these naked pictures

[01:29:08] appear, somebody busted into their cloud or maybe they released them themselves.

[01:29:13] I know I'm always on the fence about that.

[01:29:15] Maybe you need a little bump in PR that week.

[01:29:17] Hey, what?

[01:29:19] I'm smoking hot.

[01:29:20] Why don't I release a few pictures of me with no shirt on and then say, Oh no, someone busted

[01:29:25] into my cloud.

[01:29:28] It doesn't matter how I feel about the cloud.

[01:29:30] I don't understand it anyway.

[01:29:31] I'm not getting involved every time.

[01:29:33] I don't understand why my computer doesn't know.

[01:29:35] When I say, remind me later that I've never said anything different.

[01:29:38] There's no reason to present me with options.

[01:29:40] Just fucking do that.

[01:29:42] Remind me later.

[01:29:43] I will not accept any updates until you make me period.

[01:29:47] Right.

[01:29:48] Eventually it forces you to, and it does it at night while you're asleep, like a, like

[01:29:52] a gremlin.

[01:29:52] And then I wake up and everything's changed.

[01:29:54] I don't like the look of it.

[01:29:55] I don't.

[01:29:56] And there's no going back.

[01:29:59] A lot of thoughts on that.

[01:30:00] A lot of thoughts.

[01:30:00] All right.

[01:30:01] Termites.

[01:30:01] Um, you guys have a good Christmas.

[01:30:04] Merry Christmas.

[01:30:04] Any other holidays you're all celebrating?

[01:30:06] Whatever.

[01:30:07] Oh.

[01:30:07] Maybe out there.

[01:30:08] Tomorrow night.

[01:30:10] Tomorrow night is an epic Nashville pub crawl.

[01:30:14] Um, I'll, I'll report back.

[01:30:16] Um, um, my parents.

[01:30:19] Pickleball partner, Pinky Tito.

[01:30:21] And, uh, there's like five spots and ending last call down there.

[01:30:29] And then there'll be last call out here.

[01:30:31] Um, and yes, I'm not driving.

[01:30:34] Neither is Pinky Tito.

[01:30:35] Um, the Hermitage Hotel is to me, it's old school, but it's, it's a historic.

[01:30:42] It's on the historical national, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[01:30:44] It's one of the most beautiful hotels in the whole country.

[01:30:46] Mm-hmm.

[01:30:47] And you just feel like it's the sound of music at Christmas when you walk in.

[01:30:51] And then there's a cozy little bar.

[01:30:52] But I just like to walk in there at least once every three months and go, good.

[01:30:56] It's still here.

[01:30:57] Everything looks the same.

[01:30:58] It's, it's beautiful.

[01:30:59] But their other ones are more fun.

[01:31:01] That's more like a, you know, classic.

[01:31:02] The rest are like pop-up.

[01:31:04] There's the Mariah Carey pop-up bar.

[01:31:06] Are you going?

[01:31:06] I'm going to be attending that.

[01:31:08] I don't even care.

[01:31:09] I don't even care about Mariah Carey, really.

[01:31:10] I just want to see what it's like.

[01:31:12] Um, there's a secret one in Printer's Alley, which is off of Broadway.

[01:31:17] If you're ever coming down here, if any termites ever come in, they want me to plan an agenda.

[01:31:20] You just hit me up on Twitter and I'll do it for you.

[01:31:23] The team email.

[01:31:24] You know what?

[01:31:25] I'll just put out my own and then they can follow it forever.

[01:31:28] I'll put out my, what I would do.

[01:31:30] I'll put out my own and then I'll put out my own.

[01:31:31] I've said it, but not in a cohesive, you're coming to Nashville.

[01:31:34] Here's what I would do.

[01:31:35] Um, Printer's Alley, whatever.

[01:31:37] That's enough talk.

[01:31:38] All right.

[01:31:40] Merry Christmas.

[01:31:42] I've got to get going to a tiny Christmas village.

[01:31:45] Oh, nice.

[01:31:46] Yeah.

[01:31:46] And then that, well, I got to swing by and get some greenies and I'm hoping for some

[01:31:52] Christmas greenies at the pet store.

[01:31:55] Um, I'm being yelled at cause I'm out.

[01:31:59] They stand in front of the Bigfoot tray.

[01:32:01] That's where the treats go.

[01:32:03] Yep.

[01:32:04] I'm like, well, let's see how desperate you little assholes get.

[01:32:06] Are you going to eat some other treats now that those aren't available?

[01:32:09] Nope.

[01:32:09] Doubt it.

[01:32:10] Not feral.

[01:32:11] They won't.

[01:32:12] Not feral.

[01:32:13] No.

[01:32:13] All right.

[01:32:15] Merry Christmas.

[01:32:16] And I'll see you before the new year.

[01:32:18] Cause I'll be back in time for one before the new year where we're going to have a lot

[01:32:20] of year end wrap up articles.

[01:32:22] Nice.

[01:32:22] I have 10 most dangerous cities.

[01:32:24] I have the 10 most drunkest cities.

[01:32:25] That's my favorite list.

[01:32:26] And let me just say Wisconsin.

[01:32:28] We, somebody needs to check in.

[01:32:31] Somebody's got to do a check in.

[01:32:32] Like a welfare check.

[01:32:34] Holy shit.

[01:32:35] Half the cities are them.

[01:32:37] And a lot of wrap up stuff and that's it.

[01:32:39] So go have fun.

[01:32:40] Everybody be safe.

[01:32:42] Bye.

[01:32:42] Bye.