Episode 167: Wisconsin’s Greatest Bar Dog, Gatorcicles, & Decoding The Red Solo Cup

[00:00:01] Hey everybody it's me Kathleen Madigan welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, let's talk about what's been going on. Fights! In the words of Stevie Nicks, welcome. Welcome everyone. Welcome.

[00:00:32] Episode 167, the Publisher of Me Open Paddles is here, a little under the weather but still made it. Yeah. Still made it. Still having a beer. Or two. Or two, that's exactly

[00:00:45] how to get rid of a cold. What am I drinking? This is Boots and Hose, get it like a fireman? Um yeah from I think San Luis, I say San Luis Obispo, I know it's not supposed to be said

[00:00:57] like that. I've been corrected. But it is. And that's the way, but then they said it's the white people's pronunciation that took over. Much like near my Ozark house Versailles is Versailles, but nobody's calling it Versailles because we, nobody except me took French in

[00:01:16] high school. This is a delicious little beer, Citrus Blonde Ale, that'll wake you up in the summertime. Excellent work. What a weekend! What a weekend before we get to everything

[00:01:29] San Luis Obispo, as I like to call it. Lewis! I know. I had never been there. It's the home of Cal Poly. I didn't know that. Cal Poly Tech. And then I looked that up. It's a techie,

[00:01:42] but they work with agriculture too. There's a lot of weird, well not weird, but farms. I don't know, I just don't picture driving up the 101 and seeing cows running and sheep were running. It's very Midwest-like, but yet not. It's a very cute town. I'm sure very expensive.

[00:02:03] But I just wanted to find a little dive bar to have a beer. What? You found a Bill's Bar. Yeah. And then I wandered into this bar that already had Buffalo things, but it's not called

[00:02:12] that anymore. And then these Buffalo people came and said, can we make it a Buffalo Bill's Bar? And the bartender was like, I guess. And they're like, well, you open at 6am. And he goes, if you can promise at least 20 people, well, 30 or more showed up.

[00:02:25] The mafia is good. Because the mafia travels well. They're very serious and they'll drink their ass off. If I was the bar owner, I'd say absolutely this will be a Bill's Bar because nobody drinks as much

[00:02:35] as those people. Granted it's beer. They even had Labatt Blue light on the menu. It was crazy. That's awesome. And I can't remember. Yeah, that's the place. Is that where the Madonna Inn was or was that Monterey? It was no, it was in San Luis Obispo.

[00:02:54] Yeah, it was. It was. You guys got to go Google this hotel. I can't explain it. All I can say, it's called the Madonna Inn. I did not stay there because I didn't even know it existed. But then I always Google

[00:03:07] what's around me, blah, blah, blah, once I get there. I don't know how to describe it, except I think it's what things would look like if I dropped acid. But I've never dropped acid, so I

[00:03:19] can't be responsible for that. That was the Fremont Theater, which is an old historic thing. They were going to tear it down. The city saved it, just like a Hallmark movie. Just a wonderful crowd. And then Monterey, super wonderful. My friend Lorene, who directed Bothering Jesus on

[00:03:38] Netflix, did a great job. She came. That was fun. And Monterey, I got to go walk on the dog beach. If you watch the golf tournament this weekend, I tried to swing in there to just have a beer and

[00:03:53] maybe get a shirt for my dad or something. There was way too much setup going on though. Yeah, I'm like, well, my little bar where you could overlook the first tee, that one. And then there's, that was closed because they're making some VIP, there's just construction shit everywhere.

[00:04:09] I get it. They got to set up for this big tournament, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But if you were to see the tournament on TV, they will show the beach below you, and people walk

[00:04:18] with their dogs. They do it all the time on the ins and outs of the commercials. And that's the beach. It's Carmel Beach, right? And Carmel is just, I mean, obviously adorable. And I'm sure

[00:04:29] well, I did. I got the real, I always get the real estate thing just to see there's nothing on there. No, millions and millions and millions and millions and millions. And that's when I was

[00:04:39] there. I'm like, holy shit. I think this is the Bay John Denver crashed in and I Googled it and I was right. Monterey Bay. I could have been standing right there and watch poor little John,

[00:04:50] who I love so much, just eat it in Monterey Bay. And he had a house there because I'm like, what was Mr. Colorado doing out here? Well, he had a little house there sold for 3 million,

[00:05:01] three bedrooms, three baths. Yeah. I'm sold a while back. It looks like hippie fun, but ain't no hippies anymore. Hippies can't afford to live there. This is a terrible, the hippies got priced out to go inland. That's would be my bet. That's what happens in Southern

[00:05:16] California anyway. So anyway, we'll go through some stuff I got and then we're going to get into it. So many things. If I seem a little tired, um, it's because as the addictive person

[00:05:32] I can be, I got into a show on Netflix six hours later and I'm like, I'm ruining Tuesday, but I was like, who cares? Yeah. I mean, I have stuff to do, but I'm awake. I've had coffee.

[00:05:47] Now I'm having a beer. I'm waking up for all this for sure. Um, so I stopped by the post office. So I don't get yelled at by my ladies up there. Um, and in the mail, we're going to thank Lauren

[00:05:58] because she gave me some handmade stone bracelets. They're very, very cute friendship bracelets, even though she's not like a Tay Tay person, which you know, I'm half in half out on the

[00:06:06] Tay Tay. Not out. I'm only half in. I'm not, I know you're all in paddles and I know there's so many people my age are that are all in that. I just, I don't know. It's a bandwagon now.

[00:06:19] Well, welcome. I'm all in with Stevie. I'm all in with Stevie. Welcome. Uh, yeah. But unlike the Tay Tay people, seeing Stevie's once a year is enough for me. If it saw more than once,

[00:06:31] I don't know, it would ruin them the magic of it to me. But I don't know. I'm also the lady at the concert that's going to have four giant beers and those kids at the Tay Tay thing.

[00:06:43] That's why it's a wonderful concert to go to. There's no lines for alcohol. The children don't care. And I'm like, wonderful. I'm so happy. None of you give a shit. Go over there, trade your bracelets and grandma will be over here drinking all the liquor.

[00:06:59] Kay and Alan said, uh, cat, speaking of cats, wait, I know I'm a little, I'm a little all over the map. I put a video up on Instagram. The cutest cat in the whole world showed up on the porch.

[00:07:11] Seemed very friendly. Well, I opened the door. Now I couldn't find the three hooligans that live here at the time. And, um, it, it ran in. No, it's not still here. I would love to. It's

[00:07:25] someone's pet. It's somebody who has some, a few dollars cause it has an Apple ID tag and bells and bows and shit. This cat's got more shit on it. It was a very cute cat though. It ran right

[00:07:37] in the house, jumped up on the guest bedroom thing and flipped over for me to pet its stomach. And I'm like, wow, wow. This cat could be so easily stolen. And it let me pick it up. I mean,

[00:07:47] I put it back outside, but then baby cat saw it and it's very hard to get baby cat riled up. And she went, you could hear it on Instagram. Her ears went back, but the, the dumb baby

[00:07:57] cat's not, I don't think she can see that good. And she's not the brightest of the three. There was a glass in between them and she's like, there's not game on baby cat. There's no game on

[00:08:08] here. The door is closed. There's glass in between you and that cat. And that cat just kept banging in. Like I've never seen a cat though with, um, I could afford an air tag, I suppose, but what does

[00:08:23] it do? I can't follow the cat. I can track it on my, if I put, Oh, but they're outside too much. They go in the wood. I've read all this stuff. Don't get started with me either. Cat people,

[00:08:34] cat people are crazier than dog people. I'm just saying, but I'm a cat person too. So I will put myself, but they did make good points that if your cats are outside a lot, they're over in the

[00:08:47] woods a lot and I don't want them getting caught. And then, yeah, I just rather not know where they're going. I know what they don't do is guard this property. I found Kato in the planter while

[00:09:00] the other, tucked into the planter, sound asleep. That other cat came, thankfully it was friendly. Um, and it didn't want anything except to be petted, which is, Oh, and it ate a bunch of food.

[00:09:09] It's probably telling all the other cats, you're not gonna believe this shit. They just leave it out on the porch all day. Yeah. Well, I do leave it out on the porch. I bring it in at night. I've

[00:09:19] learned my lesson. No food on porch at night or Mr. Possum comes Mr. Fox, everything, everything, the skunks, everything. Um, Kay and Alan brought me cat stuff, uh, and a Dolly Parton wisdom book,

[00:09:31] which I may incorporate once I'm out of these quotes. Michael gave me a possum blanket. It's awesome. Yeah. It's being mailed back. I had to have a lot of stuff shipped back.

[00:09:40] Uh, and some, uh, possum Bigfoot themed artwork. I don't have that yet either. And Kelly said the funny beanie. What? It's all in the mail coming back to me. Yeah. I can't get it all home,

[00:09:53] especially when I'm running for the earliest flight in the world. So I can go home and do what watch football. Oh my God. So good. Should we talk about football for a second? Well, I know,

[00:10:04] but I got, I should, I should do my shout outs first. Um, cause I got to taste some of this anyway. Um, so there's this jerky right here. This is from Leslie. It's called Cantonaio brothers,

[00:10:15] fine jerky mesquite solid strips of beef. I always have like, I always love how these things say sugar-free, but then if you go to the sodium, whoa. Yeah. But that's what I like. That's why

[00:10:27] I like it. Yeah, this will be fine when I'm 75. It's good. Yeah. I like mesquite jerky. Cantonaio as well as since 1947. And the only pretty small batch battered. I don't know where

[00:10:47] it's from though. They brought it backstage. So shout out to Leslie for that. And Billy Pat and Christine, Taylor made golf balls and they have the Madigan's podcast logo on them. I know,

[00:11:01] but now I don't want to hit them. But then I think maybe someone will find it and go, what the fuck is that? And then they'll come listen to the podcast. Wonderful. Um, Claudia,

[00:11:12] Susie Q's pinquito beans. Um, that's not here. This jerky doesn't. Oh, you got to boil up. Right, right, right, right, right. Um, Jeannie, the Bigfoot sound machine, love it. Norwegian hand cream. There was so much local beer from Amanda. I gave a bunch to my friend

[00:11:32] Lorene because her husband, Tony really likes tasting weird beers and I can get some home, but not all. And then I decide, um, which people in the staff can have it. She also sent cat toys.

[00:11:45] I think baby cat knows now. Cause when I come home, the big suitcase, it's the first one she, she sits next to it and goes, she knows there's shit in there for her. Um, cookies from Jason, um, and Hannah and extra. Nice. Yeah. Sherry, Lisa and Zoe, uh,

[00:12:05] go over beach suckers. Oh, the California fish taco cap for baby gap. She already, that one's already out of the bag. Yeah. Loves it. Um, a Monterey, that was the state theater. Monterey's got a great feel. The golden state. Oh, as in the golden state warriors as in

[00:12:24] California is the golden state. I get it. I get it. Little late to the party. Cynthia and Michael, um, some Thai spicy peanuts. Yeah. Um, Patty and Bruce, the pebble beach hat. See,

[00:12:40] I was going to go down there and buy stuff and I don't come. It was too crazy. Um, and then they brought this salami. This, I love salami. This is from Faustman's artisanal pork

[00:12:52] five alarm habanero. Yeah. I got a beer ready and I got a backup beer too. I don't, I can't see where it's from though. I can't read it. And I have reading glasses on. You taste it. I'll look it

[00:13:04] up. Yeah. Well, Oh, it's from San Juan, Bautista, California. All right. Well, here we go. Let's see. If it's really five or long. Well, Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's no, it's not gross.

[00:13:27] It's just five alarm. It is five alarms. They're not kidding. Holy shit. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Well, I love salami. Wow. Wow. Um, well, I'm almost done with this part. Amy brought a banana slug

[00:13:45] hoodie. One of the softest things I've ever felt. It's wonderful. It's in the laundry right now. Steven and a La Crema Chardonnay who doesn't like La Crema and technically we're in wine

[00:13:56] count a country there. I don't, I always think of like Sonoma and Napa. I don't think of Monterey and I know they didn't know that. I didn't, it didn't. And then I did see vineyards driving

[00:14:06] down from Monterey and down there. No, I didn't go to them. Why? The wineries are not my thing. I don't, you know where they're like, um, do you want a sample? No, just give me the bottle. I

[00:14:19] don't want to sit here with tiny glasses and I would do that at a brewery cause I like to taste different beers, but wine, I don't know enough about it. I don't really care enough. Just give

[00:14:31] me a pinot noir that I can see through and I'll be quiet in the corner. I won't bother anyone. It's called Kool-Aid. No, uh, I, but I like wine, but the winery thing, no. And there, I know people get so excited about

[00:14:44] those vacations and then I think, I guess we have to hire a driver cause how are you going to get from winery to winery if I'm slowly getting hammered all day? Um, but I, there's too many explanations. The stories are too long. You don't, it's, there's science involved.

[00:15:00] It's science and, and yeah, I just, I don't know. It's like if you had a bunch of potato chips, I don't care how you made them. I just don't, just give me the bag of Lay's. I don't,

[00:15:09] I don't care. Um, Stephanie, uh, brought some stuff for the night guards. Um, yeah, a red book, protein puffs. I haven't really run those by him just yet, but we will see. And

[00:15:21] oh, I got these people that owned a bagels shop and we ate two of them backstage. They were the best things I've ever eaten. Yeah. It was Lorraine, Dennis, Janice, Kristen, Brian,

[00:15:29] and Wanda, Deborah and AGA brought some local beers and um, a bunch of other stuff. So shout out to everybody that brought stuff backstage. Um, uh, this, I'll read this note later. Uh,

[00:15:43] but it was a good one. And the, oh, I didn't say I tasted these taco works, uh, tortilla chips from San Louis abysmal Lewis white people pronunciation. Oh wow. Surprisingly delicious. Yeah. They really are good. There's a kick to them. Taco works. All right. Um,

[00:16:07] let's talk about the football. Um, Detroit, all my sympathies. I know I didn't want to see Detroit lose, but you know what? They keep blaming the coach for the call. You know,

[00:16:23] a couple of times he went forth that he goes for it, blah, blah, blah. Okay. Yeah. That's all. Probably wasn't the smartest thing, but you also didn't score any points in the second half until

[00:16:32] the 49ers didn't give a shit anymore. Yeah. They don't, they're like, oh, head score another touchdown. You can't catch us. So you can't really count those points. I think what's his face. Uh, the 49ers made adjustments at halftime and Shanahan, the son of the other one, right? The

[00:16:47] other Shannon, the same Shannon senior. Um, so I hope I'd be excited though. If I was a Lions fan, you got a good year, you got a good future. Um, you probably can't go all the way just like that,

[00:17:00] but you know, it's the halftime adjustments. He nailed you. He got you. You can't just blame it on oh, an extra point. We went for two or oh, it was fourth and one and we went for it. We should,

[00:17:13] there's a lot of other shit going on there. Um, and all the players played well. I know the poor kicker, but you know what? If you're smart, just stay over there. You don't

[00:17:25] want to be the one that misses and loses the game. Kickers don't get enough appreciation when they make it. It's always just expected. And then they get crucified if they miss it.

[00:17:33] It's a horrible job. Not enough. Well, I have a story. I have a good story about Tyler Bass and update. Um, and then the other game was chiefs Ravens and Lamar didn't show up. I said it,

[00:17:49] I said it, I said it, I said it. Good morning football, blah, blah, blah. If you, who do you trust more Lamar or Patrick Patrick Mahomes Lamar? I don't know what happened there,

[00:18:04] but if you would've told me that score was going to be 17 to 10, I mean, no, the over was like 55 or some crap. All right. That's enough football talk, but it's good. We're going on to say

[00:18:16] you lost a tiny bit of money on draft Kings. Well, that's because I think all the whole world did. Um, uh, there was a lot of lines messed up. And then when San Francisco allowed that Detroit

[00:18:29] touchdown, that really up the lines. Yeah. That's when people go on the NFL is rigged. But like me and my cousin Mike always say, if it is rigged, it's still one team that's going to do something.

[00:18:39] You got to pick just pick who cares if it's rigged. I don't even care. That's how much I like football. I don't even care if it's fake in front of my face. It's not rigged. Yeah. I should

[00:18:50] have my cousin Mike calling with some betting tips for the Superbowl. Uh, cause he could tell you why. And he's usually right. And he, um, I don't know. I'm going to take for the Superbowl,

[00:19:03] Kansas city. I'm taking Kansas state, even though my bracket, I have San Francisco going all the way. I've changed my mind. Now Kansas city was playing like shit leading up to the playoffs and this,

[00:19:12] and now they look great again. So I'm allowed to change my mind. I'm allowed. And I'm changing my mind. Who's winning the bracket pool. Uh, my dad, it was like 37 people. I'm like, does

[00:19:26] everybody realize? Um, sometimes we jokingly call him stroke a lope my dad, because he's had a couple of strokes, but is he's fine. I mean, his brain's fine and all that. He's fine. Um,

[00:19:37] I'm looking at this going, God damn, his brain is 50 times better than mine. And he, and he's up to speed on all of it. So anyway, he's winning as of now, but for him to win,

[00:19:49] San Francisco has to win. There's other people right up on his ass that have anything. All right. Moving on update. Hold on. This was, this is just crazy. So share, um, you know, she's trying to

[00:20:05] get conservative queen share. Where is she back there? Trying to get conservative conservatorship over Elijah blue, her son, Elijah's wife claims that share is a manic depressive and unfit to serve as a conservator. Good luck on that. Yeah. She said she's a manic depressive

[00:20:30] and categorically unfit to serve as Elijah's conservative in new documents. Uh, this is the ex-wife. No, it's still his wife. Did I say X? This lady's an ex-wife. Did I say that? No, it's not. It's his wife. Yes. Don't put crazy facts into my head that

[00:20:56] I thought I didn't check and I probably didn't. It's not an ex-wife. Um, here's what she says about her. She says, to my knowledge, the petitioner share has never known the security code to her own home. Does not drive, does not prepare her own meals or dress herself

[00:21:14] and has admitted to me that she is a manic depressive. Okay. Well, when you're a zillionaire, I would laugh my ass off if I said to share, Hey, what's your garage code? And she went four,

[00:21:25] nine one, one, two, four, nine. Of course she doesn't know she doesn't drive. Why would you, if you didn't have to? I hate driving, but I do, but I hate it. She does not prepare her

[00:21:36] own meals. Me neither. I hate cooking. I hate everything about it or dress herself. Well, I don't, I don't have anyone to dress me. So I put on my own clothes. Um, she further alleges that share's personal assistant, Jennifer Ruiz has taken over the Moonstruck star private affairs,

[00:21:53] private and public affairs, and believes Ruiz would do the same with all men, leaving him surrounded surrounded by triggers. Hmm. A trigger is that bad people? Is that what that means? Um, uh, he says he's successfully managing his finances. He's rented a home with this lady and remains

[00:22:17] sober. He also writes that he's been using a financial manager to issue necessary payments to the trust left him as late father, Greg Allman. I bet that's a shit ton too. The Allman brothers, cause they still get played a lot on the serious radio and all. He said,

[00:22:34] I could have demanded that my mandatory distributions be made to me directly as required, but I did not do so. He said he's also submitted to voluntary drug testing three times in January,

[00:22:45] all of which he passed. And he reveals that he's been illicit, uh, substance free since October 10th. There's another, uh, hearing set. Well, I have the results. Survey says, judge says, share you're out. Whoa. But you know what? Then at least she can go,

[00:23:07] well, I tried. Right. If he's pissing on his money, wait, he's like 50 years old. I don't understand this shit. Well, let him piss it away. I mean, I don't know. Yeah. Here's what a judge ruled.

[00:23:18] A judge on Monday rejected or requested her adult son be put into court conservatorship, controlling his money. Um, he was not convinced. Oh, she Jessica, somebody was not convinced that a conservatorship was urgently needed in the decline of addition. She will consider a larger

[00:23:34] long-term conservatorship at a hearing in March share observed the hearing remotely. She appeared on a large screen in the courtroom throughout, but did not take place and take part in the arguments. If I was any of the attorneys attorneys, that's all I could focus on his share

[00:23:48] is on a big screen right now. Um, so she doesn't get to hope he doesn't spend it all on drugs or whatever he likes. Um, we'll do an update. He filed divorce, Elijah to get rid of this lady.

[00:24:10] And then, um, immediately. Oh, he dismissed it before this hearing. Yeah. Well, he doesn't want to be married to the judge. Won't care about it. They don't care about what's going on there. Um, it's all about, uh, are you a competent adult? And if he's been drug-free

[00:24:33] everything, illicit drug-free since, um, October, let's see, October, November, December, it's only three months, but he's trying. He's trying up update. Yeah. Update. This is so. Okay. So we talked about Tay-Tay stalker and I'm not just saying this

[00:25:01] because of Taylor Swift. I'm saying this because I cannot believe that stalkers don't get more trouble than they do. They're never held. They're released right back then at the same goddamn day.

[00:25:11] Well, this guy he's been arrested twice. He was a let out again and he was arrested for the third time, less than 48 hours after his arrest, digging through the garbage bin across her street in New

[00:25:24] York city. I know. Um, all right. She has a townhouse, but she also has a Batman garage. I've seen it on Instagram and I'm like, Holy shit. Yeah, it is crazy. He admitted he was there to see

[00:25:37] her at the same location, less than 48 hours. He was arrested shortly before seven. Um, they called a security team, uh, to block that. Uh, Oh, they got a police block on after seeing the guy who'd

[00:25:51] been arrested standing on the street, staring at her building. They spoke to the man, told him to leave the area. You know, he, I just don't, like, I don't know if they're keeping him or not,

[00:26:03] or if he got let out again. But I mean, if you're, if you're whoever Taylor, any other, these people, I don't, Oh my God, there's a picture of his eyes look like pinwheels. I mean,

[00:26:13] he's there like popping out of his head, like, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. But this is like, I had this. So this is where it gets crazy. Um, not just with her, but this stalking shit. Um, this guy's

[00:26:25] 33 years old. His name is David Crowe. Um, you gotta, I don't know what you do with them. Put them in a psych ward, something and go, no, Cuckoo bird Johnson. We're not doing this. Um,

[00:26:38] here's some people that, uh, were stalked and John Lennon. Uh, this guy, cause I watched that whole documentary, this Mark David Chapman, the guy who killed him went up to the doorman

[00:26:52] and then the doorman goes, Oh, you want to see him? He usually comes out about this, gave the guy's schedule. Now that was back then I get it. But also if I'm Yoko, well, I'm not paying the HOA

[00:27:03] dues this month. If you told that man when he could actually kill my husband, um, no, I'm not paying. And they're probably a lot in New York. Um, he was just hanging outside the, uh,

[00:27:16] the, the, um, yeah, he shot Lennon before notoriously opening a copy of JD Selinger's to catch her in the rise. He calmly waited for the police to arrive. Then there was Rebecca Schaefer tragically shot and killed by a stalker when she answered the front door of her LA

[00:27:33] apartment, 19, she was only 21 years old. He was an obsessed fan. He paid a private investigator tracked down her address to vehicle records. It that's all out there. If you, unless somebody

[00:27:43] bought it in a corporation, um, he's still in prison. Um, then they passed a law. It was the first anti-stalking law in 1990, which makes it a crime to willfully and maliciously harass another person who makes a credible threat with the intent to place that person in a reason

[00:28:00] and reasonable fear for his or her safety. This applies to normal people too. I mean, not all, they're not all rich, famous people. This girl probably wasn't even that rich. Uh, Teresa Saldana raging bull actress was approached by a crazy stalker outside of her West Hollywood apartment

[00:28:15] in 1982. A stranger asked if she was a famous actor. She appeared to be when she said yes, never say yes. Violet super fan, Arthur Johnson stabbed her multiple times with a hunting knife.

[00:28:29] She survived when a delivery truck driver fought off her attacker and pinned him down until cops arrived. She spent three months recovering in the hospital after the attack. He said he, he wrote in his diary, he was on a divine mission to bring her to eternity.

[00:28:42] What? Yeah. And then, oh, I remember this because I had just done this venue. Um, the, one of the youngsters, uh, very sad. Christina Grimey. She was on the voice, which I didn't know. I don't watch

[00:28:58] all those things. Um, no, I'm watching. Well, I'm going to tell you what I'm watching. Um, what I watched for six hours, a voice, our voice singer and YouTube star was killed by an obsessed

[00:29:11] fan while signing autographs at a post concert event in Orlando, Florida in 2016. So sad. Yeah. He was infatuated. They thought he thought the two would get married. Um, and then, uh, wow. Oh,

[00:29:25] Madonna had a guy hopped the fence and her people killed him. They shot him. Yeah. They shot her stalker Robert Hoskins after he hopped the fence at her Hollywood Hills estate in 1995. He had previously said he'd either marry Madonna or slash her throat from ear to ear. Fortunately,

[00:29:45] she was in Miami, Miami at the time. Yeah. He only got, he got 10 years for that. Any year. So, you know, if you're Madonna now, maybe he doesn't want to stalk a 65 year old

[00:29:57] these days, but I think about it. I would take him on it and then you think, well, what's the answer? So if you're a Tay Tay, do you give up on New York city and go to some giant estate?

[00:30:06] But then I think that's just more land. He can jump a fence. Yeah. Yeah. You know, say you're the Judds with 5,000 acres or whatever they have here in Nash outside of Nashville. How can you

[00:30:18] possibly guard all that? Garth has a mountain. Garth has a mountain. Garth should have a mountain. I'm sure he's emblazoned a giant G on top of it. Update. Arizona plans have been submitted for you to get a what? Please approve it. So next time I come there,

[00:30:43] it's going to be near interstate 10 and Bullard Avenue. The city zoning and planning commission unanimously approved a plan to rezone 71 acres. Boom. Yes. The Goodyear city council still needs to vote on the project before it can move forward. Right now there's 47, uh, Bucky's locations,

[00:31:02] 34 in Texas. The rest are dispersed across the Southeast United States, Wisconsin's getting one, two, they'll open the Dells update. This is a sweet update. It's a swap date. Buffalo Bills fans support Tyler best. That's their kicker who missed the field goal, which did not help

[00:31:21] in their losing effort. Is it an effort? If you lose, there's been a rush of positivity. I say P a W S support online for Buffalo Bills kicker Tyler bass after he missed a 44 yard kick in the

[00:31:35] 2724 divisional round loss to the chiefs that would have tied the game with a minute and 43 seconds left. Everybody got so mad. He had to delete his social media. It was very upsetting, very sad. Uh, well, everybody's donated so far. It's over $110,000 to be made to in his name,

[00:31:52] to the 10 lives clubs, a nonprofit cat adoption group based in the Buffalo area that is dedicated to reducing the number of cats euthanized every year. And the number of put in shelters per public relations, Kimberly LaRusso, the numbers now continuing to increase, increase. He has a

[00:32:07] picture of him supporting it and he has a really cool cat. I think it's a Maine Coon cat and it looks like a Batman cat. It has black eyes. Like he's white and black. Yeah. Um, so at least

[00:32:18] something good came out of it. He shouldn't have to delete his yeah. There's his cat. Hey, only a punk would hurt a cat or dog. Show your soft side. He's adorable. Yeah. Is he single ladies? Buffalo people get on it. Update Alexander Hamilton's pistol. I told you

[00:32:37] about it. Well, it got $800,000. I told you gun people, gun collectors, gun enthusiasts, if you will, it was expected to achieve about 500,500. We talked about this and I said, I think it would

[00:32:55] get a lot more because there's so many gun has his initials on it. Um, Hamilton's a very popular musical. Um, well it got 800,000. I just think people with that much money, if you have 800,000

[00:33:10] just bid one five. Right. I don't, I would think that would have gone for a lot more update. I do not understand this and every, all the termites sent it to me immediately. And I

[00:33:24] had already was already on it, but keep sending those things. Cause sometimes I'm not on it. If I'm traveling or whatever, protesters hurl soup at the Mona Lisa in Paris. Soap. How many

[00:33:39] security meetings do we need to have? How many guys you were not allowing soup in pumpkin soup. Nonetheless, it was gross. I know. I know. And then if it was something I liked, I'd be mad.

[00:33:51] They wasted it. They could have fed homeless people with that soup. This two ladies, one's a younger one and one's a little older and they jumped, they threw the, it looked like they had

[00:34:04] the soup in what like a bud, uh, like a beer. I call them coddles can bottle. I hate those. Just go with a can or give me a bottle. But this, I don't like the middle, but Ron did have a good

[00:34:14] point because the lid screws on, on those, like a Mick ultra, the coddles as I call them. If you're golfing, the wind won't flatten out your beer while you're driving your car. See, these are

[00:34:25] CeeLo, CeeLo drinking tips. Even though I don't like the taste, I don't like the beer coming out of them. Whatever. Um, that's what it looked like. They had soup in, it looked like a can bottle of

[00:34:35] beer, but instead it's orange soup. Now the Mona Lisa is covered in glass, but somebody's got to clean all this shit up that I would make them do it. First of all, here's our cleaning stuff.

[00:34:44] Start now. And then you're going to be arrested and you're going to prison. I've had it. I've just had it, but I really had it with security. The hell is going on? I mean, no, it, the answer

[00:34:55] is no. Um, you know what? If you have to, we, you get lockers and say, you can't take that in. If you want to run a locker, they're right there. You put your backpack and all your bullshit,

[00:35:06] but you're going in here hands-free. There's drinking fountains if you need a drink. There you go. Old school. We're going Catholic grade school. There's two drinking fountains. Follow the arrows. Get on over there. If you're dying of thirst. Um, the environmental group,

[00:35:19] I'm not even going to say their name. Um, two protesters involved in the campaign. We're behind that. The Louvre has reopened the cell day. Ta I said that right? Sal day, which means room of

[00:35:32] States, which houses the Mona Lisa after it was evacuated. Then I started reading the comments. And one guy goes, if you think that's the real Mona Lisa anyway, you're a moron. You know what? I don't think the Louvre is lying to me. Um, two activists about the bar,

[00:35:49] the Louvre security staff was immediately intervened way too late, way too late. You know what they did? They put up like those partitions so nobody could see them. Well, it doesn't matter if you can't see them. You can hear them. I could still hear them going,

[00:36:01] like they're calling the children. Like, um, the museum said it was logic, a complaint. Um, the enigmatic portrait is no stranger. I, we know the history of that. I don't need to go to

[00:36:13] the, um, in 2009, a woman angrily threw a ceramic cup at the painting, breaking the cup, but leaving the painting on harm. We are walking in with your morning coffee from home and a ceramic cup. No,

[00:36:28] they've got to stop this. In 2022, a visitor smeared frosting all over the Renaissance era paintings for Dr. Frosting. Oh ma'am, can I see what's in your purse? Don't fuck with my Betty

[00:36:41] Crocker ready to made frosting. I love that shit. I eat it right out of the can. I just do not know bag policy exactly, or it's gotta be the clear bag like at the stadiums and the people

[00:36:56] checking need to really check. Are there any, is there anything in there that could be thrown or damaging? Um, it's just terrible. It's terrible. That's what my inner old person comes out. That's just awful. Okay. Oh, we're moving on to holy shit. They found it.

[00:37:17] This is, they might've found it. And all the, the, all the termites were on this one too. This is one of the first books I read for a book report. And this is where my parents should have

[00:37:25] been like, okay. Um, one of my first books was about Amelia Earhart's missing plate. So it's no surprise that I'm still obsessed with flight three 70, the Malaysia airlines, airline, Mississippi. Um, cause I couldn't believe, well, I watched a thing with my dad way back and they

[00:37:45] said that they found like a woman's cream thing on this Island. Like did her and Fred live for a while? Did they die? Well, a former us air officer spent $11 million searching for Amelia Earhart's

[00:37:58] long lost plane. And he may have found it. So here's the thing. He found somebody who's playing. It's a, it looks like a plane with the sonar now is it hers? I don't know. A lot of those

[00:38:12] islands were stopping places in world war two. Um, he believes an image he captured using, um, may have finally answered one of the most baffling mysteries. What caused the disappearance of the

[00:38:24] iconic pilot at the height of her fame? Tony Romeo is one of a long line of researchers and hobbyists who have taken up the search for air hurts distinctive Lockheed C and then I think,

[00:38:35] well, I would like to hang out with somebody like that to a point though. If you're going to spend an 11 million now you're obsessed. Like I'm obsessed when I feel like it. And then I let it

[00:38:45] go. Like Malaysia flight three 70. I've pretty much let it go, but I do have Google alerts, but that's normal. That's normal. Um, the mystery sounding or it appears as long since public research puzzle researchers and spurred conspiracy theories over the year from the

[00:39:00] Japanese taking her prisoner. And there were witnesses, Japanese people that said we saw two white people, super tall lady. She was very tall that were in the Japanese. That's another theory. The other theory is Nikumo Island. Um, everybody doesn't need to know all the theories.

[00:39:18] I know there's a lot out there. Um, this guy, Romeo, a former real estate investor who sold commercial properties to raise the 11 million needed to begin to fund the research returned

[00:39:29] in December from a roughly a hundred day voyage at sea with a sonar image that believes he shows the last point, the lost plane in the oceans depths. Now, none of the, none of the articles

[00:39:39] I read, I couldn't figure out if this is near the Island that they thought they land on because they found American stuff, like two people survived and then died. Like by a little fire and all that

[00:39:51] kind of stuff. He used a $9 million high-tech unmanned submersible by, this is all hard shit. Nobody needs to know. Um, he was getting out of real estate and looking for a new project. So I

[00:40:05] started about 18 months ago. This was something I've been thinking and researching for a long time. Um, they captured a sonar image of a plane shaped, uh, object about a hundred miles from Holland Island, but didn't discover the image. So I don't, how close is it to the Island?

[00:40:22] But didn't discover the image in this submersible until the 90th day of the voyage, making it impractical to turn back to get a closer look. So they were too far away. Well, you got to speed up

[00:40:31] that process then because you're going to have to keep going back if you're not getting it till two, three days later. Um, okay. The image was taken just about right geographically compared to where

[00:40:46] Earhart's flight is believed to have gone down. Other people say they need clear views and more details such as the plane serial number until you physically take a look. There's no way to be sure.

[00:40:55] Right. It could be a World War II plane. I don't know. Any people know, are those the same planes? What kind of, which he was flying in? Um, it could be right. It could be a missing aircraft

[00:41:06] loft in the Pacific or less interesting, perhaps another man-made object that fell off a shipping container. It looks like a plane. I don't see it looking like a shipping container thing. He's confident. Um, so we'll do an update if there's a confirmation, they got to go back though.

[00:41:24] Right. Uh, this is fun. This is exciting. This is my research. Uh, well, it's a holy shit. They found it. It's from my research. It's just in Heather and Arizona. New. These are on top of the ones

[00:41:39] that I already talked about new colonies of emperor penguins revealed by bird poop visible from space. These emperor penguins, these, yes, yes. Um, these guys are my, they're, it's me waddling at you. They're five foot tall and they weigh a hundo. Um,

[00:42:00] can you imagine if I was an actual penguin? Like I didn't understand they were that big. I did not understand that emperor. I know emperor means the large ones, but I didn't understand five foot tall, a hundred pounds coming at you. I would make eye perfect eye

[00:42:14] contact with it. Yeah. Uh, poop stains are rarely caused for celebration. Yeah. But they're the reason and our researchers have been able to identify four new colonies of emperor penguins, a species threatened by extinction, by climate change. The scientists from British, uh, survey

[00:42:34] use satellite images to spot telltale patches of penguins. Guano visible from space, a series of Brown smudges against the vast of the white continent. The four colonies most likely existed for years, but it hadn't been spotted until Peter Fretwell, um, poured over some of the images.

[00:42:52] Some of the colonies appeared to be moving as climate change threatens the Antarctic sea ice on which they live in breed. Um, emperor penguins are classed as near threatened with about 600,000 left in the what? 50% drop over the past half century. That's sad. They don't bother anybody.

[00:43:11] Um, no. So hold on. I want to see if they put, cause I had two of these articles. Yeah. Um, five foot tall. That is crazy. Um, we're going to practice your penguin. I'll do, I'll do my penguin model. Maybe I'll go on stage like that. Um,

[00:43:30] five foot tall. That's crazy. Um, moving on to news news. This is my state. Yeah. Alabama hold our beer. Missouri has got something to say. A Missouri rule would allow senators to challenge each other to a duel. What did you just say?

[00:43:56] I'm for it. I'm all for it. I think it's time. We just start shooting each other. All these politicians, if done correctly, we'll end up with half the amount of politicians we had

[00:44:05] to begin with a Missouri of the minute. Missouri, a member of the Missouri Senate has proposed a rule change that if passed would allow senators to challenge each other to a duel. Senator Nick

[00:44:15] Schroer put a motion into the, to adopt a rule, um, to allow state politicians to settle grievances through physicality. His proposed amendment was posted on Twitter, uh, by Missouri Democrats. It read if a Senator's honor is impunged by another Senator to the point where it's beyond repair.

[00:44:36] And in order for the offended Senator to gain satisfaction, such Senator may rectify the perceived insult to the Senate's Senator's honor by challenged the effect, the offending Senator to a duel. I'd like to see Nancy and Mitch go at it. Probably take 50 rounds to hit anything

[00:44:53] because there are a hundred they're just shooting up into the air. The trusted representative known as the second of the offended Senator shall send a written challenge to the offending Senator. The two senators shall agree to the terms of the duel,

[00:45:08] including the choice of weapons, which should be witnessed and enforced by their respective seconds. The duel shall take place in the well of the Senate at the hour of high noon, high noon, high noon. And we'll also, I'll be selling high noon seltzers outside.

[00:45:22] We're going to treat this like WWE and I'm going to have a cooler, um, on a date that the parties agree to the duel. First of all, I'd like it outside. I don't want it in the bottom of the

[00:45:31] Senate. No, no, we don't need to be wrecking shit there. We have a nice Capitol. Let's not do that. Um, I'm for this. We can eliminate half of our own politicians if they agreed.

[00:45:46] Senator Shrew is deeply committed to restoring a sense of honor in the Missouri state Senate. While the idea of a duel may have been suggested in a metaphorical sense. Oh, I don't think it was. No, no, no.

[00:45:57] Uh, the way you got to see the response to, uh, the Democrats called, uh, in a statement, they, they called the whole thing an embarrassment. Well, right. I mean, but somebody spent time on this. I mean, seriously.

[00:46:18] Yeah. I'd like Claire McCaskill go after any of them. She's rural enough. She knows how to, I'm sure she knows how to shoot a gun. Um, so this guy said a Missouri Republicans proposal to reintroduce dueling to a salve estate state house differences was branded under stupidity

[00:46:35] by a leading historian of political violence back in the day. So-and-so of Yale tweeted, they were smart enough to take dueling outside. Yes. That's what I'm saying. It's all so much more fun if we're going to have an event, let's really do it up. Let's, you know,

[00:46:47] make it like the rodeo, maybe put it at halftime at the rodeo. Every, every small town in Missouri has a rodeo. Yeah. Yay. Here comes the Democrat. Yay. Cause Republican. Yay. And then it's like

[00:47:03] the Simpsons. If you're the opposing party, the draft that I saw suggest doing in this, in the chamber, this doesn't show guts or great guts or bravery or manhood. If it's opposed to it shows utter stupidity. I agree. It's ridiculous.

[00:47:18] I said, bring it back. I want this back. And I want halftime shows where we put children in balloons and they fly to wherever they fly. Go see if you can find your kids called find your kids

[00:47:29] can be a new reality show. Can you find your child? I love it. Um, hold on. Oh, speaking of WWE. Oh my God. My friend little door for me. So excited. Do I watch wrestling? No, no, no,

[00:47:45] no. I did with my grandma as a kid. Cause it was a thing called wrestling at the chase live in St. Louis. Um, we had three real channels and two fuzzy ones to where they were fuzzy.

[00:47:55] Sadly hockey was on the fuzzy one. So if you think hockey is hard to watch now, you should have seen it when I was a child, but wrestling was on one of the fuzzy channels

[00:48:02] because it was being broadcast from downtown St. Louis from the chase park Plaza hotel. So it was live wrestling at the chase. Nice. My grandma liked it. So I watched it with her,

[00:48:09] but I, I quit. I, yeah, I don't watch wrestling anymore. And, um, I don't watch UFC stuff either, but I do like boxing. That's where I'm a hypocrite. Cause I'm like, I love boxing.

[00:48:21] And then somebody turns on UFC. I'm like, Oh, this is so barbaric. Oh Kathleen, the, the boxing wasn't, I don't know. Bark boxing seems, I just see how mutilated those people get in the UFC thing. That's terrifying. Like, yeah, I guess boxing can be as bad,

[00:48:37] but it always seems to get stopped before it goes into like, somebody's just kicking a guy who's bleeding to death. Um, yeah, not blaming anybody likes it. I just, I think Netflix took

[00:48:48] big steps into live events on Tuesday with more than a $5 billion rights deal that would make it the exclusive home of world wrestling entertainments raw from January, 2025. Dorff will be so excited. He could get his matches live. The 10 year partnership will put raw on the

[00:49:06] streaming platform in us, Canada, Britain and Latin America among other territories. Yeah. The Lucha Lucha Libra. Um, I'd rather watch that much rather watch that because the Lucha Libra, their costumes are fantastical and great. Their mask are fantastic. They're like goalie mask.

[00:49:23] Um, they're going to have pay per view live events such as WrestleMania and Royal Rumble. The streaming pioneer has the option to expend, extend the deal for another 10 years or to opt out after the initial five years. Um, Netflix began experimenting with live events last year

[00:49:40] with comedians, Chris rocks, a standup special selective outrage. It has also found success with sports related formula one document documentary series drive to survive and the behind the scenes documentary of full swing. Chris rocks. I like Chris. I know him. He's nice. Um,

[00:49:58] but to do standup live, it's really no different than if you see a taped, I mean, if you go see my show and then you go watch something, well, I don't do them. And I don't. So a year before I do a special, let's say

[00:50:13] whatever you saw on stage is what you will see on that special. Pretty much live. Doesn't, you can always go watch a standup special. I don't want to go watch a boxing match after I already

[00:50:23] heard who won. Well, kind of, but I'm not gonna pay for it. I'm just going to wait for it to come on YouTube. Speaking of, um, so there you go, wrestling fans, if you're into it and speaking

[00:50:32] to Netflix, um, my six hour binge. Oh my God. I did not think I was going to go down this rabbit hole. I do have things I should be doing, but see, this is why the nuns were right. Kathleen

[00:50:46] does not make productive use of her free time. Um, go watch if you, if you like true crime and you've, you enjoyed Narcos and like movies like, you know, Scarface and all that. I love those

[00:50:57] Godfathers all that blah, blah, blah. Um, this is called Grizz, Grizz, the Della G R I S D E L A. Sophia Vera. I never know how to say her last name. Sophia Vera, Gaara, Vera, Vera. Um, she plays Gris, Gris, Stella Blanco.

[00:51:21] Gris, Stella, Griselda, Griselda, Griselda. I know it's hard. Gris, Selda, Griselda with a G Sophia, Sophia, Vergara, Vergara. Um, well, Sophia is a lot prettier than the real one. I Googled a real one, but she was the number one, uh, female Narco for a long time.

[00:51:43] And she took over all of Miami and the amount of people she killed is unreal. But this show, I might have to go back. There's a, there's scenes in there where you, I must've said out loud by

[00:51:54] myself a hundred times, Oh my God, like I couldn't believe what I was seeing. And it's all based on a true story. And I won't tell you what happens, but I'm just saying, if that's your thing,

[00:52:06] uh, six hours later, there's six total. So I, that's really bad for an addict like me, because if you have an addictive personality, you're going to go, Oh, fuck, I'm on board. There's,

[00:52:18] if there was 13, I'd have stopped. Yeah. I just go get more wine and more people are going to die. And none of you should have taken these jobs. I mean, I'm sorry you did, but I don't know. It was,

[00:52:32] I hope she wins every trophy available with the awards that could be had by her because I don't really, I know she's in some silly shows and she's always funny and she's pretty. Um,

[00:52:46] but this was crazy. Uh, everybody in it's great. And even the kids are great. The, her sons and, and the, the parties, the amount of money they spent because it's the, it's the late seventies,

[00:53:00] eighties, and everybody's dressed like that. And the cars and the, I can't even, I can't even believe it. And she's an executive producer. Good for her. Does that mean she'll get a shit

[00:53:10] ton of that money to, um, uh, move it on. This is, this is crazy. This is crazy. And, uh, I've been here quite a few times. Developers want to build America's tallest skyscraper in an unlikely city.

[00:53:27] Would you like to guess the tallest one? The tallest ever? Way in the United States. Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh? No, they don't have enough room downtown. You'd have to wreck something. You giving up? Uh, Wichita. Wichita. Wouldn't that be something? Seattle. No, Seattle's got the space needle.

[00:53:49] I know, but Amazon's got money there. Well, Amazon does have, and so does Starbucks. How about Austin? Not Austin. It's too crowded. Ron would get mad. Ron's top 10. He'd get mad. Nope. A group of developers want to construct what would be America's tallest building in an unlikely place.

[00:54:05] Oklahoma City. The proposed location for the 1,900 foot legends tower is certainly unconventional. The skyscraper would be more than double the height of Oklahoma's tallest building now and the fifth tallest building in the world. The tallest buildings in the United States right now

[00:54:22] are in New York and Chicago, the country's first. Oklahoma City. Yeah. Respectively, Oklahoma is America's 20th largest city with around 700,000 pupils. Developers note that Oklahoma City is expanding and it can support such a project. It grew by 2% between 2020 and 2022.

[00:54:42] That's not a whole lot. It's going to be part of this entertainment thing. Let me see if that was all in here because I read it somewhere. So it's a place called Bricktown and I believe there's a

[00:54:55] comedy club there called Bricktown Comedy. I see my younger friends working at that place. I never worked there. It didn't exist when I was doing clothes. It would have a Hyatt hotel with hundreds of rooms and this tower around 1,700 apartments and 110,000 square feet of retail stores and

[00:55:14] restaurants. So it's functional. That's cool. I like it. In Bricktown, the district where the massive development project and skyscraper is slated, the developers say demand exists because of the new sports and entertainment options. Voters recently approved a new arena for the

[00:55:30] NBA's Oklahoma City Thunder and plans for a new soccer stadium in the works. But they have to get approval from Oklahoma City to build the tower. So we'll tell you if it happens. It's going to cost $1.6 billion and include the $770 million. The tower alone is $770

[00:55:54] million. Multiple sources will fund it, including $200 million in subsidies approved by the city. All right, fine. Yeah. This is how you grow. I thought they were going to say it would be at

[00:56:07] that new resort thing we talked about out here in Oklahoma somewhere, but I don't even remember. Five states are offering you up to $20,000 incentive to move there. Hello, children. Children. Children. North Dakota. No. North Dakota's not one of them.

[00:56:33] Do you want to guess again? Iowa. Nope. Iowa is not going to do this. Wyoming. Nope. All of those should. They should all think about this. West Virginia. Kansas. Oklahoma. Indiana. And Kentucky. I would pick...

[00:56:59] Kansas I like. Parts of Kansas are fine. There's a lot of blank Kansas. There's a lot of blank Kansas. There's nothing. They have signs that are like, do you have all the shit you need? You won't

[00:57:10] see shit for another 7,000 miles. I think West Virginia and Kentucky. I'm thinking airports and stuff. I don't know. I think... I don't know. Kentucky would be more my weather. I'd like the

[00:57:30] weather in Kentucky better. I could just go down a bourbon trail and commit to the sweetness of bourbon and go, I'm in. The cost of living increases around the country. Some states are offering big financial incentives to bring new residents into their towns.

[00:57:45] The... hold on. They're doing it through weird incentives, but nonetheless you will get the money. So a real estate company said the cities in the Great Lakes, Midwest and the South are the hottest

[00:57:59] markets. Boom! Home value growth and how quickly homes are being sold. West Virginia. They offer $12,000 to remote workers who move to the Mountain State. West Virginia is beautiful. If you can work remotely, okay. You have to be 18 years older and have a full-time remote job to qualify for

[00:58:18] the program. If selected, are you listening Michael Shumlerville? My friend. Participants will receive $10,000 over their first year paid in monthly installments. They will receive $2,000 after completing their second year in West Virginia. Completing your second... you make it

[00:58:34] sound like you signed up for a college. Well, I was shipped away to the Sorbonne and I completed my second year and I was given an apartment in Paris. Cities such as Morgantown, I've been there,

[00:58:46] it's fun, and Greenbrier Valley offer additional incentives to bring the total up to $20,000. Kansas. City of Topeka is offering $15,000 to move and work in Shawnee County. I don't know enough about that to commit to that. Participants... I mean, I know I've been to Topeka. Yeah. They can

[00:59:03] receive $10,000 for renting in the first year and $15,000 for purchasing a home. Yeah, one of my nephews. Yeah, he's in Topeka. Yeah, sometimes. And then, I don't know. These kids work remotely and they just buzz around. I don't really know what they do. They'll call from crazy

[00:59:22] locations and I don't really know. Kansas office offers a tax reimbursement for employees moving expensive for those who want to relocate to the Sunflower State. Kansas is the Sunflower State. Average home in Kansas, are you listening Californians? $212,000.

[00:59:40] Oh, wonderful. Oklahoma. They're offering $10,000 to remote workers who moved to Oklahoma. Well, I could say I work remotely and I just happen to travel a lot. Yeah. Right? Right. Well, I'm going to get on down to Oklahoma City then, live right in that tower, right there. Yep.

[00:59:58] Right by the comedy club. Yeah, same. Indiana, several communities will wear if it's by St. Elmo's with their spicy shrimp cocktail. I'm totally there. You get cash incentives starting at five grand. In Southern Indiana, Davies County will give new residents

[01:00:16] five grand to move to the rural community. Average home value in Indiana, are you listening New York, California? $227,000. Bam. Mike job. See, go. But this is for the children. Go start somewhere. You can live somewhere super fancy later.

[01:00:36] Kentucky. Five counties in Eastern Kentucky came up to offer, came together to offer financial incentives through remote workers, shaping our region. Package includes five grand cash relocation up to $2,500 bonus for a spouse who will work locally in education or healthcare.

[01:00:55] That's a good idea. Yeah. And a welcome package worth 250 bucks. You're going to have a great time at Applebee's. Here's the problem. When they say rural area, that means I might have an Applebee's. Definitely have a McDonald's. It's gonna be hard to spend

[01:01:12] that 250. Oh, does that count for liquor or do they limit me and guys? No alcohol included in that welcome package. Average Kentucky home value. $194,000. Stop it. I'm trying to help the

[01:01:26] children. Yeah. If you're young and you don't have kids and cars and houses, go. Why not? Take the money. Take the money. Frozen alligators in North Carolina. I only know this because I asked the

[01:01:45] people at Keowa, Keowa Island is in South Carolina. And it's one of my favorite places on earth to golf because it's really going into a swamp. There's alligators and ospreys and it's

[01:01:56] just, you just go into a whole nother world. And the trees, everything is just magical. My mom didn't like it. There were alligators everywhere, Kathleen. I'm like, I know mom, there were four

[01:02:06] in the lobby. And I was like, what the fuck are alligators? Everywhere, mom. They're just everywhere. There was one in my room. I called down to housekeeping and said, can you please remove

[01:02:13] the alley? She'll see one on the side of the road. Oh my God, the place is just crawling with alligators. No, it's not mom. There's a lot on the golf course, but they stay by the pond. They

[01:02:25] don't do anything. So if it gets too cold, so alligators can breathe underwater for a very long time. And that's why, and snakes can go underwater too. A lot of people think snakes can't be

[01:02:37] underwater and yes they can. And they can bite you underwater. That's just another something. Yep. Yep. Terrifying gator sickles were found suspended in North Carolina swamp when the temperatures dropped. So what they do, that's what they're calling them, instead of an icicle.

[01:02:52] So what the alligators do is they, when the ice starts to free, if it starts to ice over a pond, they shove their snout through the ice and then they can still breathe. And then they freeze in

[01:03:05] that spot, but they're still breathing. Now the question is how much would it cost you to step over that thing and hope it didn't wake up and attack you? That's a game I like to play in my

[01:03:15] head. The frozen alligators were, you can see there's pictures of them go online. It's amazing. You just see their snouts coming out. Frozen alligators were recorded at the swamp park, a coastal tourist attraction that allow humans to spy on alligators in the wild.

[01:03:30] It's alligator sanctuary about 175 miles South of Raleigh. If you want to go see one, you can go see gator sickles. Their pond that they live in has frozen thick enough for these

[01:03:43] guys to do what they do, which is stick their nose up out of the ice so that they can breathe and suspend themselves in the water. The rarely witnessed adaptation allows alligators to survive

[01:03:51] cold snaps while frozen in place. When you pass by, you'll see only snouts and teeth, really big teeth sticking out of the murky ice. It's considered an extreme form of brumation, the less restrictive reptile version of winter hibernation. They wake up to drink water and bask

[01:04:07] in the sun on warm winter days. North Carolina is the most northern range of the American alligator. I did not know that. The American alligator. Yeah, due to the extreme cold experience in states

[01:04:19] farther North. But you know what? Like there's, okay, so I'm sitting here in Tennessee right now. There's no alligators in these lakes yet. Right. They're in Alabama though. Yeah, they're coming. And they're coming North in Alabama. Gatorland's going to get real busy.

[01:04:33] Gatorland's going to be very busy with lost alligators that are being, somebody's calling a sanctuary and go and get this thing out of my yard. What am I supposed to do with it? The 65 acre Swamp Park made international news in 2018 when it became the first sites

[01:04:51] in the world to document alligators had mysteriously found a way to adapt. They told me this in Keowah a long time ago. They could stay frozen in place for days at a time. Temperatures fell to 17 degrees on Ocean Isle Beach the day the video was recorded.

[01:05:05] They just instinctively know when the water is about to freeze. They position themselves right at the right moment and close their eyes and are allowed, allowed the water to harden around

[01:05:13] them. Yeah. There's a lot of them in this pond too. So there you go. If you want to go see one, I just told you where you want to see a gator sickle. Not a problem. I love it. Never heard of it.

[01:05:25] I like it. Um, I think this is mean and I don't agree with this. United Airlines flight attendants face being terminated if they use their mobile phones. When? Well, that's just it. What do you want to dial it back to 1950 where your quote stewardess

[01:05:45] was sitting there reading a magazine? I mean, I've seen, yeah, I've seen him smoking a cig, probably having a cocktail in her go-go boots. I mean, they, if it's a, if it's a cross country

[01:05:56] flight or even a flight of two hours or more, there's a time when they have nothing to do and they're sitting in the jump seat. What they used to read books. So while books exist or

[01:06:07] Kindles exist, I'm saying what is the difference between Kindles? Oh yes, they do. Cause in first class, if I, sometimes I will see there'll be an old, old turtle as I like to call it,

[01:06:19] holding on downloading shit left and right. Loves that Kindle. Somebody bust one out every single flight I'm on and I'm always like, wow. All right, I'll start taking pictures. And their font is usually enormous so I could read their book for free.

[01:06:37] They're going to face disciplinary action, which could include even being terminated if they're caught using their phones. And really, honestly, I've seen when there's nothing to do, they've fed everybody, they've given everybody a drink. It's downtime. I've seen them on their

[01:06:50] phones. I never thought that was a rude thing. No. That what do you, if you, and a couple of times I did want like another drink and I just walked up and said, excuse me. And then, oh sure. They hop

[01:07:01] right in. It's not like, this is so strange that they would go down this road. United sent out a hard hitting memo explaining exactly why it's going to start taking such a tough stance on flight

[01:07:11] attendants caught texting, playing games, or even watching videos on their mobile phone or other devices like iPads and tablets. The memo politely reminds crews that they are there to provide visible and attentive service to customers. Well, see now what the first thing they always say is I'm here

[01:07:25] for your safety. They don't like being thought of as a flying waiter, waitress, instead of server. I know my dad will go, is that gal our waitress? Both of those words are not using anymore. Dad,

[01:07:41] we're not using gal. She's 57. We're not using, we're using server. We've moved on. The whole country's moved on. Customers look to flight attendants for great service. How comfortable would you be asking someone for help if they were engrossed in their cell phone? No problem.

[01:07:57] Same if they were reading a book. If you're polite and nice, what impression would that give you? Well, cause she's got nothing else. He's got nothing else to do right now. We're flying. Everything's fine. Yeah. I don't know. There's bolts on the plane. United,

[01:08:11] I think you should spend your time worrying more about on-time departures. You don't see any of this shit going down with Delta. Nope. Just saying. I love Delta. I know. Although I flew 2 million miles total, I guess, and they sent me a model airplane.

[01:08:34] What do you think I'm a 13 year old boy? The fuck is this? It's enormous. I don't know what to do with it. It's a Delta plane. Oh no, it's already put together. They didn't even give me the fun of

[01:08:50] going, well, maybe I'll try a model. See if I can glue my fingers together as a child. Like I would, I hated models. I don't follow instructions well. And then I just try to stick shit in.

[01:08:58] I'd shovel wing here or something. And no, my brothers had all those models and cars and it's tiny pieces. No, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with it. Yeah. Strange. Oh, they say it could have an impact on safety. What?

[01:09:26] They're just really mad using a mobile phone while sitting in a jump seat during takeoff and landing. I don't see him doing that ever. No. And I fly United sometimes. Well, when I'm forced to and it's against my will, but Lewis speaks highly of them.

[01:09:41] Lewis flies them out of New York all the time. Um, you know, but I just don't, I think that's just unnecessarily mean. I don't, what do you want them to do? Magazines used to be okay. Yeah. What's the difference if she's zooming through tick tock or reading

[01:09:59] a magazine or he or whomever? Magazines are ridiculous. I still can't believe like one of those WH Smith stores in every airport and it's a chain and it's mostly magazines and they're like $11, $8, $11. And usually it's already outdated info. So I don't know how

[01:10:26] they're still all doing it. I don't know. It's ridiculous. Um, by the way, Lewis is garden and gun should be at his house when he returns from his trek out West. I'm so excited. He won't know why. Yeah. He doesn't have any guns and he doesn't

[01:10:42] have a garden, but you know what? Because he gives me consumer reports and then he sends, and I'm like, he also sends me this magazine called the week, which I do like, but he clearly

[01:10:54] clicked on something and I get two every week. I don't need to, I only need one. Yeah. I get two weeks every week from the week. The consumer reports I said at one time or another, man,

[01:11:10] I wish I had one of those consumer reports cause Oh, I was going to buy an ice maker and I didn't feel like researching it. And he heard that. And then I think he got all excited and thought,

[01:11:18] I know what I'm going to get her for her birthday. They, they do have interesting things. Like I do like it. It's just some days I get home from the road and I'm really tired. It's been a

[01:11:29] long flight home and I get the mail and I'm like, that's too hard now. Garden and gun open it up. Summer cocktail. You never thought of. Yes, yes, yes. Um, this made me laugh really hard.

[01:11:43] There's a British zoo and it has a plan to rehabilitate its potty mouth. They cost badly to these parrots, not just damn or shit. They say very bad things. They're going to try to

[01:11:57] make them stop. A British wildlife park has hatched a new plan to rehabilitate potty mouth parrots after they unleashed a tide of expletives back in 2020, the five foul mouth African gray parents, uh, parrots donated to Lincoln Shire wildlife park in Eastern England were isolated

[01:12:13] from the flock and they attempt to improve their language. But from Tuesday, the team is adopting a different riskier approach of integrating the three newly donated cuss happy birds named Eric, Captain and Sheila across the original five miscreants into the flock. When we came to move

[01:12:31] them in the language that came out of them, out of their carrying boxes was phenomenal, really bad, not normal swear words. These were proper swear words. Um, we put eight really offensive swearing parrots in with 92 non-swearing ones. Well, what if those eight teach the 92 how to say

[01:12:49] fuck you? Now you're going to have 92 parents going, fuck you. If the new strategy works, the eight parrots could learn, eight parrots could learn all the nice noises like microwaves and vehicles reversing that other parrots

[01:13:06] in the, in the flock favor. But if the other 92 instead pick up the cuss words, it's going to turn into some adult Avery, Avery. I never say that right. Aviary. Right. Um, they have large signs warning the visitors or that's what would make me want to see them.

[01:13:23] I don't need a warning. How about an invitation? Kathleen, would you like to see these parrots cuss their ass off? Yes. Yes. But so far the park hasn't received a single complaint. We do not hear, we did hear

[01:13:36] a lot more customers swearing at parrots than we did parrot swearing at customers. Well, I'll let you know if it works out. I'll stay on top of this story. Turbides, don't you worry. Yeah. Um, all right. I'm going to save a couple of these for next time.

[01:13:55] Um, I will say that the Volocopter, the flying taxi, they're really trying to get permission to be at the Paris Olympics and I want to see it and I want them to get permission.

[01:14:06] A German company is seeking to use the exposure generated by the Paris Olympics to overcome the opposition of local politicians and demonstrate the flying taxis can serve the French capital. Come on, let them, they, you know what? You should bring the get who's ever the host

[01:14:21] in on one of these into the infield. Oh, wow. Marketing. Yep. Um, if you could fly it in Paris, you can fly it in any city of the world. The company's VoloCity is a two seat electric

[01:14:36] vertical takeoff and landing aircraft that resembles a giant insect crown with 18 rotors. It wants to be the first such aircraft certified by the ESA, EASA and FAA, the European. But so far

[01:14:49] they're saying no, they're not going to let them. Why not? If you crash, it'd be one of the most memorable Olympics ever. And that German company would have to go back to the drawing board.

[01:15:05] That's right. Oh, I did. Um, I mean, I did forget. I promised this and then I'm going to tell you a funny little story and we'll be done. What are the red? Okay. So on your red solo cup, I should

[01:15:17] have brought one up. I'll save it for next week when I have the cup. No. Okay. Well, here's the truth behind the myth because everybody has their own theories of what those lines are. Do you know

[01:15:29] what? When they said everybody has all these theories, I never thought twice about it. I just went, Oh, look at that. I just, that's how they made a cup. Yep. Um, red solo cup. I fill you

[01:15:41] up, but to which lines long, we thought that lines of the solar cup were there to measure alcohol content, but snoops, uh, I guess that's a bigger to debunk the theory. The belief was that the

[01:15:51] bottom line does it Nate's one shot. The middle line is five ounces of wine and the top is 12 for beer. Who would think about this? Never even crossed my mind. Well, plus I really, if possible,

[01:16:05] I'd not, I'd really rather have wine in a glass. Sorry. It could call me, you know, like, it's not I'm not a snob. No, I want my beer at a solo cup. Fine. But wine. No, that's even, I would go. No.

[01:16:20] Um, they say the company says that the placement of lines was not meant to act as a way to gouge serving sizes. The true meaning of the line is asked on its website. A lot. The lines mean

[01:16:30] something different for everyone. Um, the original 18 ounce solo cup, which launched in the seventies headlines that recall roughly equaled measures of one equal measurements of one, five and 12 ounces. Well that, yeah. But once you pour your beer in, I guess this is why I never think about

[01:16:49] it. I pour my beer in and it's perfect to hold a beer. I don't need to think, Oh look, there's 12 ounces and there's 12 ounces and it can't, um, for some, it means a responsible poor at their next

[01:17:03] tailgate. That's never happened. I've never felt I need to take this solo cup and put a responsible poor in it. No, I'm like, is that cup deep enough for all my beer? That's what I would think. Um,

[01:17:15] and for our litter fans, it means they can stack and unstack our cup into a pyramid without sticking them together. That's what I also thought was going on. And I may or may not have them in the

[01:17:25] back of, uh, the car and the kids really, when they were little, it was a great toy. They loved it. I mean, by the end, well, I, in their car seats, I would give them solo cups and they

[01:17:36] bang them and throw them everywhere. I mean, there'd be 50 of them all over the car when we were done, but they had a good time. So really they don't mean anything, but they are that

[01:17:46] measurement. The lines on our part of cup were designated for functional performance and are not measurement lines. If the lines do consign with certain measurements, it's purely coincidental. I think it's more for the stacking because they stack perfectly. Yeah, yeah. I like the square

[01:18:02] ones. The square ones are good too. Um, all right. This made me laugh. It's a wonderful Wisconsin story. Yes. And then to our minds, we will move on to other things. Milwaukee dog disappears located at a bar a mile away from home having fun.

[01:18:26] Jenny Hazard's dog bear has always loved an adventure. When he was younger, he was a runner. Hazard said, Hazard thought that was a thing of the past until Wednesday night, January 24th, it was getting kind of dark. I was outside with all three dogs, one minute bear and

[01:18:40] the next was there and the next he wasn't. I'm looking for and going, where's bear? The gate was cracked, but bear was nowhere to open, but no bear was nowhere to be found.

[01:18:50] After about 20 minutes, I was just in tears because he's old and he's got a heart condition, but being the social butterfly that bear is, we get a text saying your dog is down at Fink's.

[01:18:59] I'm like, what? Bear was just out for a cold one. Great. I'm relieved he's okay. But what is he doing at a bar? She laughed and said, a friend sent a picture of him having fun at the bar.

[01:19:11] They took good care of him. I guess he was pretty popular. Well, it remains a mystery how he got there. Old man breaks free, goes to bar. Ha ha ha ha. The good news, he made it home safe.

[01:19:20] In the end, Hazard learned that bear was inside Fink's with a group of girls going bar hopping. The owner of the bar says the ladies must have picked him up out in front of the bar. Their

[01:19:28] first stop being Fink's. It's a little white, like, I don't know what kind of dog, a little tiny white guy. He's funny. Cute. There's a picture of him at the bar too. We'll put it in the show.

[01:19:39] Just because it's a little thing to turn your day around and go, look, this bear, this little dog just said, fuck it. I'm going to the bar. All right, Terms. Well, I'm going to tell you

[01:19:48] where I'm going and then we're going to do a quote and then we're out. This weekend, Birmingham, Alabama, Atlanta, Georgia, February 17th, Scottsdale, Chattanooga, the 23rd, wait, 17th is Arizona. 23rd is Chattanooga, choo choo. 24th Huntsville, Alabama, March 1st and 2nd,

[01:20:11] Detroit, Detroit, oh, AKA Royal Michigan. Then Dayton, Indy, San Antonio, Austin, Marietta, Ohio, Cincinnati, Tarrytown, Wilmington and we added Anaheim. So you people out there in California, you don't have to drive all the way to Thousand Oaks. You can just stay in your hood

[01:20:30] and come see me there. Fun. And then Thousand Oaks, which is a little closer to LA proper. Okay. So great. Dolly Parton. No, we'll do Tay Tay first. Tay Tay's going to the Super Bowl. She's going to go from Japan. She has time to make it. It's amazing.

[01:20:51] The Swifties are very excited. If, okay, this is in the Daily Beast 2017. I've had a guy say, as we were better as we were breaking up, you better not write a song about this. At which

[01:21:06] point I proceeded to write an entire album about it. Way to go. I read that like Dolly. That was Taylor's quote. Good job, youngster. I'm sure that Dolly's done it too. On why she didn't take her husband's name. Her husband is Carl Dean.

[01:21:26] This is Dolly. If I'd have chosen the name Dolly Dean, I'd have been to Double D again. I like it. Yeah. Good for her. What time in the morning she came up with that one?

[01:21:40] 3.45. When she's awake and the world is not. All right, termites. I will see you kids down the road. I do have to get out the Chiefs hat. I'll have to part ways with some of my California

[01:21:54] friends in route for the Missouri Chiefs. Yeah. And I think they can do it. I don't know what the line is yet. They get three and a half. They're gonna win. They're gonna win. And I think

[01:22:09] San Francisco's good. I mean, I did. I picked them on my bracket. But it's when you get hot. And when I did my bracket, the Chiefs looked a little discombobulated. And now Brock Pardy's great.

[01:22:21] Deebo Samuel's great. A lot of great people on San Francisco. But I also trust Annie Reed more than the child Shanahan. He's not his father. No, no, he's got things to learn still.

[01:22:39] His name is Child Shanahan. You're one of the children. He's not even that young. I know he's probably 50 or some shit. But what am I going to do in Birmingham? Well, go get barbecue.

[01:22:53] Yeah, that'll be my main agenda. I'm sure there's a Bucky is on the way. I'll drive. Yeah. And I have Andrew Stanley with me. Michael Palasek was the opener last weekend. If anybody

[01:23:08] was wondering, he is very funny. I like to keep it switch it up just so there's differences and you know more fun. All right, turn right. Ready?