Episode 160: Swiftie University, Ghost Bagging, & Hallmark Christmas Movie Season Begins

[00:00:08] Hey everybody, it's me Kathleen Madigan. Welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, and let's talk about what's been going on. Ten bites! Episode 160! Fire! Magic! Fire! Magic! I still got my wand with the little hair tie I've retrieved from Baby Cat.

[00:00:34] Oh my god. They can't have them. I've seen Instagram videos of cats with 100 hair ties in their stomach. And I think she's decided not to meow. When she meows, she goes, but no noise comes out. Oh. And it's just for attention because Curtis, my neighbor's a vet.

[00:00:50] He's like, she's fine. And she's acting normal. She's just going, She doesn't need to leave. She saw the suitcase. She's mad. She should be mad. I don't want to leave either, but I'm excited to go to Eugene Portland in Seattle and the villages once again.

[00:01:08] Episode 160. Let's start with what this is a holiday drink I'm recommending to all termites. Evan Williams Eggnog. It's just perfect. Get your own nutmeg to put on top. Kentucky. It's Kentucky straight bourbon with half, well three fourths of the bottle's gone. Blended whiskey, ramen brandy, 15% alcohol, careful termites.

[00:01:30] And it doesn't taste like that either. It's easily, it's easy to trick you. I have that and a beer back for this episode. So many things. Let's start right out of the gate with who's behind me. Our new king. Welcome to the court. Sir Snoop Dogg. Yeah.

[00:01:46] You've been knighted. I decided we need a king that was pretty cool and he's just cool. I liked he tricked everybody with these given up smoke and it was a smokeless fire pit. Ha ha ha. I like his corona ad on the beach.

[00:01:59] I thought he was like 60. He's 52. I'm actually older than Snoop Dogg. Ha ha ha. Whose real name is Calvin. So we're going to call him Calvin on this show. Yes. Calvin dog. King Calvin. King Calvin.

[00:02:12] And you only get to be a king or queen if you do a lot of charity work and his is youth football. He started a youth football league in California. There's now 1500 kids involved. He coaches one of the teams. Fantastic. And he's going to expand to Chicago.

[00:02:27] I read about that. Cool. And he's not on the level of Queen Dolly, but he's not as old as her. No. And he doesn't have she's by God, you know, there's by a little bit of hillbilly lion going on. I think she has two billion.

[00:02:40] They say one billion. Or I don't know. Yeah, a lot. Tay Tay has more. Tay Tay is the richest. Chief wants it. I think. Yeah. Stevie's way down in the doghouse. Her tickets because I go to the Stevie shows. Her tickets are not Tay Tay prices.

[00:02:55] If a little shares probably got a good amount. Yeah. Anyway, so that's what we're drinking. Get it. It's at your local liquor store. It's not hard to find. No. This was like 20 14. Yeah. I thought it was closer to 20. No, we've got you the small bottle.

[00:03:14] This is yeah, the big one. You can get the big one too. Southern style holiday cocktail. Delicious. We'll move this down here for now and get this desk. Notice the desk is cleaner. You did a little clean. Turmites.

[00:03:26] If you watch on YouTube, I'm going to move all this shit to a different place in the house. Really? Yes, I'm tired of being up here. We're moving. Yeah, I'm getting a little classier. I bumped up the roadcaster to a pro because the other one broke.

[00:03:39] It's not like I intended on doing that. So there's money being poured into this production. It's just one thing after another. Yeah. Yeah, I'm going to make it more fun, more cozy. That ties up here because it's cold and I mean there's heat up here.

[00:03:53] You wouldn't know it by looking at me right now with my blinking chiefs. I like your tube. Yeah. That's what we're drinking. Welcome to the court, King Snoop. Let me get this out of the way. We got one more queen coming too. We got another queen coming?

[00:04:08] She's on back order. Oh, she's on back order. She must be popular. It's the children's queen. Oh, the children's queen. All right. The queen of the children. We've moved Tanya over there. She's not retired. She just doesn't do more than what you would expect her to do.

[00:04:23] And she's tired. She's been famous since she was 13. She gets to go home and play with her horses in Texas and then do state fairs in whatever country people of that ilk do. This is all on the website. We'll get this out of the way.

[00:04:35] The cassette collector's item. There's only 20 left on earth. It's on the website. Everything I'm showing you, this is the end. I've cleaned out every closet. I've called every sibling. Do you have any of my shit in your garage? Because apparently I just dropped off shit.

[00:04:47] No, I don't know. Because I didn't ever have houses. I didn't have room in my apartments. Anyway, CDs and DVDs. And there were even a few blue rays. And if you got one of these live in Denver, you're probably only one of 12 people that's

[00:05:01] a club set from eons ago that will never be seen or heard of again until I chop it up for YouTube. And I haven't had time to get ahold of the children. There's like 50 of what? The yellow ones. The yellow ones. Yeah, that's the one, the Walmart one.

[00:05:16] Okay. So that hit that off the table. If you want them, they're on the website. And I saved a bunch of the holiday pub cash shirts to give out to friends and family. And there's a tiny bit left that I'm taking, sending back to the children.

[00:05:32] And they'll be on the website. So if you were looking for a large, there'll be a few more up. Otherwise, it's small as a medium. Small people where you're at, you're letting me down. Yeah. I'm going to cut those orders in half. If you're small, people don't. Don't.

[00:05:44] So help me Christ. I will do it. I can't be stopped. You know who's coming in hot? The Chubby Charmites. Coming in hot is the Chubby Charmites. And I appreciate all of you. Yeah. I appreciate you and the Andy Reed attitude. I'm just going to be happy.

[00:05:56] Good for you. They buy shirts. I'll tell you that. There's my Bucky's beer back. Well, we're going to try a few snacks today. For the holidays, before we move on to Queen News. Wait, you know what?

[00:06:10] I want to say this though, before I even try this because then I got to turn my phone off but I had to leave it on to read this. I don't like it being on during the bubbles. Yes.

[00:06:18] This is, so I have an email at the website for its team, Kathleen Manigan, whatever. And I go through some of them and then sometimes other people go through them and send them to me if I don't have time. This lady, Lisa. Good afternoon.

[00:06:34] I want to pass on some information to Kathleen regarding Jim Mattress Mack, McEnvale. Kathleen regularly mentions our hometown hero on her show. I recently purchased furniture from one of his stores. The day after my furniture was delivered, I received a person on phone call from Mattress Mack himself.

[00:06:49] How great is that? To thank me for shopping at his store. That man can write a book on customer service. He's just one of the reasons he's a Houston hero. And then she likes a podcast, a long time fan and heavy thanks to me.

[00:07:00] Look at him calling people. You know, well, I mean, you know he's been doing it since he was younger but now I picture because he is older, not old old, but you know, older than me, older than Snoop.

[00:07:14] I think he walks in and those, though all the youngsters are like, here you go Jim, these are the people that bought shit yesterday. You call him and you say thank you. That takes up his whole morning. He has some coffee. He makes some phone calls. Hello Lisa.

[00:07:27] It's me Mattress Mack. Nice to meet you. Okay. These are Doritos Tapatillo. Now when I open the bag, I could smell them all by a lot. Really? Yeah. There's a lot going on in this bag. I'm afraid it's going to be too hot for me.

[00:07:41] I don't think it's meant for me. And I like hot but. Smell them? Yeah, there's a. You love tapatillo. I do, but in powder form. I'm used to it in a liquid in a Mexican restaurant. It's like not a powder.

[00:07:57] By the way, I went to a Mexican restaurant two weeks ago with my friend Mark and Nicole and I was leaving as I was leaving this old man and his wife. I thought he was like an old country singer or something. He thought I was a server.

[00:08:09] I'm so, look I have been a server. I was a server for probably 15 years of my fucking life. But why do I look like a server in my coat? He's like, can you give me some hot sauce? I said, all right.

[00:08:22] But I said there's someone on the table. No, not that. He goes, no, I want the one that comes in the bowl. Oh, I go, oh salsa. No hot sauce. I'm like, I can't believe I'm arguing with this man about how I'm going to wait tables.

[00:08:37] These Doritos are too hot for me. If you're into hot, hot. There you go. They're good. They're just like, yeah. Too hot. Holiday cocoa. These are Oreos. Cocoa flavored. I already took a bite. I'll take another bite. Here's my problem with it. Oreos are perfect.

[00:08:58] They don't go in beer either. Well, listen, Oreos pair well with anything. Here's my problem with this. The white is in there like an Oreo, but then there's a layer of chocolate cocoa and the chocolate over powers the white because they're chocolate on the outside. Multi-chocolateed.

[00:09:19] Oh, may I lunch my dad? I'll drive him up. I'm making him cookies anyway. I'll put them in there. That'll shock him because he's going to get his tin of chocolate chip cookies and go, oh, look, it's like finding an onion ring in your french fries.

[00:09:32] We're like, oh, I got the bottom of the basket. Last thing. Cheese. It's my favorite snack by a million or goldfish, but I really have it rather. I would cheese it and not the fake ones in the Southwest Airlines fucking snack pack.

[00:09:51] Well, sometimes I fly Southwest because it's direct from Nashville. And then other times there's no direct flight and it's fine. I don't hate it. You know, just their snack pack. I should know better and have my own cheez-its.

[00:10:07] It's my fault, not their fault, but they have fake cheez-its. They're like weez-its. They're always just one name off. They're in that snack pack. They have one snack pack. Everything is one with Southwest. Everything tastes dale in that thing. Even the pretzels are weird. Cheese it buffalo wing.

[00:10:24] Now I don't like change so, but I like buffalo wings. Good. Yeah. Very good. Not as good as a cheese app. Really? No. When you try to make a sauce or powder, I just don't think it works. I agree. Like buffalo is a sauce. And a city.

[00:10:55] You know, a sad city after the game, the Eagles game. I felt so bad for the buffalo people. Buffalo is gross. I mean good for the Eagles and my friend Dorey. She's so excited. But buffalo, it's freezing. You spend all your money. It's a Sunday night game.

[00:11:14] They're getting four feet of snow. The only thing to soothe your soul there is the wonderful buffalo, local beers and the wings. And St. Gabriel's, that bar I love. Oh, Gabriel's gate. Gabriel's gate, yeah. I could live in that place. I should go work there.

[00:11:29] And one time I went in there, last time I went in there, there were three people from St. Louis at the bar. We were the bar. Yeah, this guy goes, did I just hear you say something about St. Louis? I go, yeah, I'm from there.

[00:11:39] And then this other lady was like, I'm from there too. I'm like, why is, I know why I'm here. I have a show in Niagara Falls. I don't know why you guys are all here. So I hope you guys had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

[00:11:50] Did everybody have a good Thanksgiving? Yeah. Mine was fine. What'd you do? I went to my brother's Justice House. Uh-huh. There were 30, there was like 28, 36 people. Um, yeah, my sister-in-law Amy did a wonderful job cooking. I brought sides of mac and cheese. I brought normal shit.

[00:12:11] My dad kept going, now you load it up on normal food, right? Just in case. Cause I can't pre-eat. Your mother hasn't made anything. And then I'm like, mom made the dressing, but here's the problem. Mom's starting to forget ingredients. So like, yeah. Oh no.

[00:12:24] Yeah, she done even, well this is where at my age you have to Google what is the normal amount of dementia? Um, like is she just 82? Or why is there no salary in the dressing, mom? What, stuff like that. This year though she nailed it,

[00:12:40] except it was too wet. It was like all the dressing came out of the turkey instead of it should be half and half and she, she knew it. She admitted it. But, and then we took all the kids bowling

[00:12:51] cause it was too cold to go to the farm. It was just cold. Yeah. They had a wonderful time. They're almost getting too old to want to bowl though. They're teenagers now. They just want to go off in a group and whisper.

[00:13:03] And I don't give a shit what they're doing. And I don't give a shit what they're whispering. I don't even care. But I'm also not dragging your ass around town when I could be drinking somewhere without you. Right, right. They used to be such good beer fetters.

[00:13:15] They're over it. Okay, will you go get me a beer? Okay, in a minute. Not the response I'm looking for. There's a bucket up there that says Kathleen. Go get it. Uh-uh. Save. Um, and then watch football. Though what a weekend. Did you see the Alabama Auburn game?

[00:13:33] Uh-huh. Now here's the thing. Self-admitted, never been a college football fan because Missouri was never good. Missouri is very good now. So now I'm a bandwagon jumper and I'm all about it. Totally admit it. Totally. I've not been a lifelong fan because they were terrible.

[00:13:47] I didn't even know anything about college football except my friend Vic, the comedian who passed away. Vic Henley, go download his stuff. Um, he went to Auburn, Auburn and hates Alabama. And then he taught me why I'm supposed to also hate Alabama. Right. And, uh, I get it.

[00:14:03] And then I watched like all the Nick Saban stuff and stuff. Well, if you didn't see the game, Auburn had it locked up. It was fourth in a bazillion, 30 something, fourth in goal. But the goal was like 30 plus. And the quarterback went back and through it.

[00:14:20] And the guy, the Alabama guy caught it in the very corner of the end zone and Alabama one, which proves to me the devil plays sports. People always say, well, look at this result.

[00:14:33] There's no, there's no God if this, you know, so and so in this person eat that. Well, the devil himself, he crushed a town. Yeah. It was just the, the memes of the Pete, the Auburn fans. Oh my God, they're endless.

[00:14:48] Um, it was just a great game to everybody either loves or hates. You love or hate Alabama. Most people I'd say hate, but I feel that way about a lot of Notre Dame. A lot of people hate Notre Dame.

[00:15:02] I don't really know why my friend Michael, the beer monster, Somerville comedian, he loves Notre Dame because he went to Notre Dame and Aaron and not Aaron, Roger and Weber comedian. He loves Notre Dame. They're both nice people. I don't really have an opinion.

[00:15:19] I just, I'm, I root for who I'm told to by the comedians when they say, you must hate Alabama. I go, I'm in a hate Alabama. And then for years I would go war eagles and Vic ago there's no ash Madigan.

[00:15:29] There's no ash drop the ashes war eagle. I'm like, well that's stupid. What's a war eagle? There's no such thing as a war eagle. You just made that up to sound ferocious against Alabama because they're the kids and died. Right. Right. What is Missou doing?

[00:15:46] Missou is doing great. We're going to make it to a bowl game. It's very exciting. The quarterback and the running back from St. Louis, like we have to recruit locally because we were so bad for so many years. We can't get the good people.

[00:15:59] Well it just turns out we got some local talent right out there in the backyard and boom they came right on down to Columbia. That's enough sports. So I know a lot of people get bored by that. So let's move on to some Queen news. I think yes.

[00:16:14] Let's move on to some Queen news. Well first of all share where she at behind me. Share was in the Thanksgiving Day parade singing her new Christmas song. And a lot of people online were giving her a lot of crap, a lot of trolls

[00:16:32] because they said she lip-sync the whole thing. Whether she did or didn't to those trolls I say go fuck yourself. Too harsh? Too harsh? She's 77. It's freezing. Everybody lip-syncing. And you've got to make your way through that traffic.

[00:16:51] I don't care if you're share or God himself, you still have to get there. She made an effort and it was great. That's the same thing with Dolly at the halftime. I couldn't believe she thought of the Dallas Cowboy cheerleader outfit.

[00:17:04] Whoever thought of that because usually she comes out in her own giddy-up outfit with Ryan Stones and stuff. That was amazing and for anybody to go well you know she didn't do this and she didn't. Shut up! Be grateful they're still out there doing something.

[00:17:20] She did hang on to the wall for a minute but fuck how it held on to it the whole time and I'm half her age. If I was in those heels I wouldn't even be able to walk out my feet would have been broken.

[00:17:28] She was great, she sang Jolene, I'm sure she's sick of it. She sang something off her new rock star album which by the way is their highest debuting album ever. Three on the billboard short so far. So far good for you Dolly. Cheers.

[00:17:41] I'll let some Evan Williams you bet. Egg not for you. Egg not for you. So that's what Dolly was up to and I say there's one more Thanksgiving item while I get to it after. Tay-Tay Dolly's news is all good. I thought the halftime show was wonderful.

[00:17:58] I wish they'd let these old people do a whole like have Cher Dolly, all the old people do the Super Bowl one. Because who's doing the Super Bowl one this year? It was someone I didn't care about. Giggle it. Tay-Tay fans. Tay-Tay. Right here.

[00:18:18] Speaking to you Bob and Ross and you paddles. You can now rent the Taylor Swift extended version, the movie. Tay-Tay's doing that for her birthday. It's $20. All parents in America prepared to give us. Usher? Why usher? Yeah. I don't know. Oh, he's fine. Rihanna did last year.

[00:18:43] Rihanna did last year. Yeah, that was good. Well, good for him. Just usher? Maybe that would be some surprise guests. Yeah, I would think so. It is Vegas. Oh, it's in Vegas, right. Maybe Kara Top will come out. I hope so.

[00:18:59] They've never had comedy as a halftime show. Nor should they ever. Don't even think about it. So Tay-Tay's movie, you can rent it for $20 in your own house. My, yeah. I'm doing it. You can do it. You can dance all you want all by yourself.

[00:19:16] It's on her birthday. It's being released on her birthday. On her birthday? Yeah. By the way, her jet has landed in Kansas City. Kansas City prepare. They're probably so excited. They said she hasn't been seen yet. She just got in at 11 a.m. She flew from Mars.

[00:19:34] What are you people? I'm sure she has a bed on her jet, but it's very tiring. She had to fly to Florida where she came from. I don't know. Buenos Aires or somewhere. Also, they're going to have a Taylor Swift college course. Another one at UC Berkeley.

[00:19:48] If you'd like to enroll for that, you could go. I could ace the Stevie one. That's probably all though. Just Stevie. I could do her lyrics and why she wrote it. And why she wrote Gypsy because she was very sad because her best friend died.

[00:20:03] And that left her as the only Gypsy. Please notice. Welcome. I don't care how shitty of a day of having, if all the cats come up to the porch and stare me down and then they stand up like mirror cats and beat on the door

[00:20:17] and I let them in when they come in. One, two, three, I just go, welcome. Makes me laugh all by myself. You can't let Stevie next. Yes. So before we move on from Thanksgiving and get to the news and stuff, this just really, I was like, God dang,

[00:20:35] I never would have thought of this. I'm just looking for all termites to consider in the future. Do you love Cracker Barrel? Yes. I do. I do. Their breakfast is really good, although I don't like the grilled toast. I need a toaster.

[00:20:48] I'm going to bring my own toaster and sit next to an outlet. I don't like toast on a griddle or a grill or whatever they're calling it. It always tastes like gas. Tastes like somebody cooked it on the back pipe of your car. Gas toaster. Gas toaster. Yeah.

[00:21:03] It's only my only complaint. And Cracker Barrels started serving alcohol. Did I have, I don't know if I mentioned that on this podcast. Sangria. Yeah. Like let's not get crazy Cracker Barrel. Sangria and gas toast. This lady did a review.

[00:21:19] My family of four spent $130 to have Cracker Barrel make our Thanksgiving dinner and I do it again for any holiday. For 130 bucks, listen to this. We received a turkey breast. This is all to feed four. Seven sides and a cinnamon roll pie. Stop it. How can you?

[00:21:37] They're going there again for Christmas. My husband and I love to cook. I never would have thought of ordering a Thanksgiving dinner. You think about like Honey Baked Ham or those places, but my husband and I love to cook,

[00:21:49] but after making a full Ina Garten Thanksgiving dinner in October. Ina. Ina. Who's Ina Garten? Is this a famous person? She's a famous chef. Yeah. Ina Garten is a famous chef? Yeah, very famous. For Thanksgiving dinner or other stuff? Everything. She's a barefoot Contessa.

[00:22:10] What the hell is a barefoot Contessa? Well, I'm sorry. Ina, I said your name was Ina. All apologies. She said I knew I wouldn't have the stamina to cook another Thanksgiving meal just a few weeks away. We never considered ordering a holiday meal from a restaurant this year,

[00:22:28] but we decided to try Cracker Barrel's heat and serve family dinner. It serves four to six people, plus a few extras. And then here's what it was like for me and my two teens. Oh yeah, it's easy to make. Cool.

[00:22:42] It was $105 total, but then I guess there's taxes, a tip or whatever. We could choose your pickup time too. Stop it. Yep. It came with oven roasts, a turkey breast, cornbread dressing, turkey gravy, cranberry relish, sweet potato casserole,

[00:22:56] sweet yeast rolls, and my choice of one country side dish. I chose green beans that are loaded with probably bacon, which is why they're probably and cooked in boiling, breaking grease, which is why they're awesome. And then paid an additional $15 for mashed potatoes and gravy.

[00:23:15] And then she added on, oh, that's why it went to 130. She added on a cinnamon pie for roll pie for dessert. After placing my order, I received a few emails from Cracker Barrel with instructions how to pick up and heat my meal. On the morning before Thanksgiving,

[00:23:28] my husband and I drove to the restaurant at a slick of the time. We were impressed with the clear signage and easy pickup system. I have noticed the pickup system at Cracker Barrel. I think it started during COVID, works like a charm. Great.

[00:23:40] Never think go get Cracker Barrel to go. I am not being paid to say this either. In case somebody's wondering, you're just doing some sort of ad. This is not ad. We don't have ads. No. No.

[00:23:50] This is because I love Cracker Barrel and I never would have thought. They got whole signs that say, holiday meal pickup this way. Special area. Wonderful. I might just do it when there's not a holiday. Sit and call and say, is there a holiday meal available?

[00:24:00] Can I get a turkey? Yeah. So they went, we gave our name to a woman at a table who entered a refrigerated mobile unit and returned with our box of food. Before we knew it, we were heading back home with a delicious Thanksgiving food.

[00:24:16] Our meal was packaged in a thick, easy to carry over a box with a lid and handles. Because we received a ton of food for $130, we stored it on ice. Coolers in our garage so it was ready to eat and it was wonderful.

[00:24:26] That's just a little tip, termites. Yeah. If you're stuck and you don't feel like doing it, there you go. Yeah. Okay, moving on, what are we watching? Well, here's a little something because I had a lot of driving to do over Thanksgiving weekend.

[00:24:41] If you're looking for a podcast and you like cults, I listened to this one. I downloaded 50 Best Podcasts of 2023 and I like cults and crime and stuff. This one's called the Very British Cult. And it's about this thing called Life House. You know, there's so many lost people.

[00:25:03] It's amazing this man isn't in jail, but people give you money, but they were promised an investment and they didn't get that. So I think they've closed him down in London, but I Googled it and he's still operating worldwide. I mean, it's such bullshit.

[00:25:18] This is why I need the IRS to get more hands-on with these things. It's like that other one with those idiots, Twin Flame. Go get the IRS. We need the nerds to go get them because the nerds will do it.

[00:25:32] There's no way this guy is managing the money correctly. I would bet all my money he's bullshitting. The Twin Flame Freaks in Michigan. You tell me that guy is on it? No, he's not. Neither is she. So anyway, it's a good,

[00:25:47] it's a great car cult one if you want, if you're bored. And I watch all the crowns that they had to offer. Very good, little sad. You know, this is where Princess Di dies. I don't like the ghost talk. We could, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. That's just filler bullshit.

[00:26:06] I don't like it. What they should have done is press conferences. I could think of the real things that happened. Not Diana's dead and then she appears with Charles. So are you so, are you upset for being so angry with me? Stop. Nope, there was no ghost.

[00:26:19] There was no conversation. It was bullshit. The other thing I've watched, the Gilded Age, it's got to pick up though. I mean, the irony is those rich people's lives were fucking boring. They sat around in expensive clothes and drank tea. Blah, blah, blah. And whiskey.

[00:26:39] And perhaps a carriage ride later. Shall we? I don't know. Depends. It is cold out. Does anyone, where's the butler? Tell him to go outside. Oh, Morrison. Is it freakish cold or tiny bit cold? I just made that up. It's good. I like the Gilded Age,

[00:27:01] but they need to make up some stories. I don't know. Somebody's got to die suddenly or... We need a little drama. No death. Divorce. Yes. Affairs. But it's historically accurate. They don't know every bit about these people's lives. You can make a little shit up.

[00:27:21] They don't know everything. Maybe a dog getting hit by a carriage. Something. Drama. This is just rich people sitting around throwing parties in Newport, which I do and like, but it's not enough. Now, the other thing we're going to talk about before we get to news,

[00:27:38] don't worry I'm not going to cheat you guys out of news. There's a lot of news. It's Hallmark movie season, and I'm going to review some. I'm not doing full reviews, I'm just telling you yes or no. Christmas by design. Yes. And I'm just going to say

[00:27:52] now that we've got rid of Cameron... Cameron... what's her name? Creme Brulee. What's her real name? Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron...

[00:28:31] Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Cameron... Uh, the built more holiday? It's a good one. It's a good one. They had a lot of ads for that and it's good. I haven't gotten into the Netflix ones.

[00:28:49] A lot of people are complaining. There's one on Netflix, it's brand new release and everybody says it's the worst Christmas movie ever, which that makes me want to watch it. Well, I'm doing other shit. I don't think I'm just sitting there watching it, not doing other things.

[00:29:01] I don't want you to think I'm that much of a lunatic. Sometimes baby cat wants to lay down and watch one. Sometimes. And then I watch one Christmas at Heidelberg. It suckered me in because I love Heidelberg.

[00:29:17] I've been there. It's a wonderful little town. Well, it's not even that little, but it's like a fairy tale place. Because it didn't get for Germans. I mean, they're not really into fairy. They're not really, they're very linear thinkers.

[00:29:32] They're not really branching out into the areas I would go. But Heidelberg didn't get wrecked that much in the war, so there's still a lot of castles and it's all on the river. Anyway, the movie was terrible. Everybody has fucked up accents and the kids start talking.

[00:29:46] I'm like, why are they American? And they're living in Germany. Oh, he's in the army. Oh, good save in the writer's room. Well, we can't find American actors with German accents.

[00:29:56] I need a seven and an eight year old. Well, we'll say they live in Germany, but they're American guy married or that's why they... I mean, the accents are so off. Go get them at the town square.

[00:30:06] There's only one funny scene in the whole movie, a German guy that works at the post office and he's very Germanic and hilarious by accident. But anyway, so there's some Christmas movies. Let's go for an update.

[00:30:20] This makes me laugh so hard. Well, I shouldn't laugh. I don't mean it's funny, funny. I mean, it's ironic. Lee Funny. A documentary about Buffy St. Marie wins International Emmy Award. I know. So the documentary though... It went nowhere. I watched it.

[00:30:44] But then we find out that everything in the documentary is probably not true. Right. So if you're going to say her rebuttal was, well, it's not up to sperm and DNA to prove who I am.

[00:30:58] Well, it is if you're taking money because you're saying you're part of that group. She's a fraud. It's sad. Well, it is very sad because she's 82 and the whole thing. But ironically, the documentary that wins the Emmy is all about her being a First Nation person. Right. Unbelievable.

[00:31:16] I think we have to have a meeting and go, are we giving a trophy to this movie? I mean, they didn't really look into it. They just took this lady's word for it. And her whole family is like, we are not Native Americans.

[00:31:27] We are white people from Massachusetts. It's really sad. I think they should let the First Nations in Canada decide what to do about this. Leave it up to them. I think that's why they're so quiet. Yep. Now here's another update. I told you guys about Napoleon's hat. Remember?

[00:31:49] It's so crazy. Well, here's the thing. He had a lot of hats and they all looked alike. So I'd have to have some serious ass proof before I put up my money at the auction house. A hat belonged to Napoleon and I want to see that movie.

[00:32:07] Although I read these reviews and I'm like, is this going to ruin it? Did Ridley Scott ruin it? How can Phoenix bring it though? Well, King Phoenix is great but if they, you know, he can't change the script. If they focus on him just being a freak.

[00:32:19] Of course Napoleon's a freak. Tiny little freak running around. But he did crazy ass things that I don't know. I'm still going. It's a long movie to commit to but... You've got time in December. I've got time in December in the beginning of January.

[00:32:34] I'm going right over to that IMAX and marching myself in with every 75 year old man that's on board too. It'll just be me and I'll make Dorf go. But Dorf can't sit still for two and a half hours. No, he'll fuck no.

[00:32:45] He'll be out in the lobby meeting people, lying to me. Dorf, where were you? Bathroom. Bullshit. A hat belonged to Napoleon when he was French Emperor, sold for a record. Two million euros. Stop it. And a euro is worth a dollar ten now I checked.

[00:33:02] So it's even more than two million dollars. Two million. Breaking the previous record for a Napoleonic... I like that term. Napoleonic, a Madiganonic hat held by the same auction house in 2014. 1.8 million euros by a South Korean businessman. Okay now what are you going to do with that hat?

[00:33:23] Mr. South Korea. Well we would put it on a queen and then at least the world could see it. We'd put it on Jolly Roll. Jolly Roll? No, I'd put it on Snoop. Because he's funky. Not as funky as who? James Brown.

[00:33:42] If you ever watched that movie, the James Brown thing is so good, the biopic. But somebody said and now I say this on stage if anybody asked me backstage, if like a production person or stage manager goes, hey how long are you doing tonight?

[00:33:54] And I turn around just like James Brown I go, ain't nobody going to tell Kathleen Madigan how long Kathleen Madigan going to be funky. That's what he said. Ain't nobody going to tell James Brown how long James Brown going to be funky.

[00:34:10] Yeah, some 24 year olds like, I think I, and then they walk away and they're like that old lady back there is crazy. So, the hat known as a bicorn is in Napoleon's trademark colors, black with the French flag colors, blue red and white in Sydney

[00:34:32] and attracted interest from collectors. The world over, declining to give it the identity or nationality of the eventual buyer. It was last owned by businessman Jean-Louis Nuis who died last year. Yeah. Wow. I don't know these people that buy these things and you know,

[00:34:52] you put in your house? Was that what we're really doing with it? All right. It's terrible. Update. There you go. This is confusing. I've tried to sort it out. Banksy reveals his name in an Unearthed 2003 interview shared by BBC for the first time.

[00:35:16] So, you know, Banksy is the artist if you don't keep up with the podcast. Well, the whole world's kind of like who is he? His identity is anonymous. But I mean there's like four people in the running. Now this one says,

[00:35:30] I'll just read it to you and then you tell me what you guys think. Banksy appeared to reveal his identity in a 2003 interview only now being shared by the BBC for the first time. Which, I don't know if I would do that. The mystery is the fun part.

[00:35:45] I mean his artwork is phenomenal and it's so politically jarring that it makes you think about everything. But the mystery is also part of it. Because if we know who he is then we're like,

[00:35:59] I don't know, I'd still like the art and I'd still want to see it but it wouldn't be as like, you know, just adds a flair. Back in 2003, the mysterious Bristol-based street artist whose identity is long-winded subject of public speculation

[00:36:14] took part in an interview for BBC's Radio 4's PM program. Banksy, who at the time was working on his show Turf War in East London spoke to former BBC arts correspondent Nigel... Nigel... Nigel Wrench about his anti-authority nature of his work still present today.

[00:36:32] Now 20 years later, they've released the full interview. During the interview, Banksy appears to confirm his first name. Are you happy for me to use your name? I mean the independent has, Wrench asked Banksy, who replied, Yeah. Is it Robert Banks, the journalist continued,

[00:36:50] to which Banks replied, it's Robbie. Robbie, okay? Robbie. Wrench reiterated. So is it Robert Banks? Now then there's this article. This is from the British Daily Mail, which I know, I know, I know, don't people need to jump my shit but sometimes it's got stuff in there.

[00:37:16] He's supposed to avoid for the country's chattering classes in the art world. Chattering classes. In the art world, a man fetid for creating works that poked fun of the establishment while famously hiding his identity. But there's an egregious hypocrisy behind all this hero-worship.

[00:37:30] Banks' reputation and financial polling power rely on the mystique of his anonymity. It doesn't rely on that. No. It adds to it. But his paintings are so awesome. He used to tell me the girl with the red balloon wouldn't have sold for a billion dollars anyway.

[00:37:44] Absolutely, I think it would've. It doesn't rely on that. That's a terrible word. And although his real name has been public knowledge for 15 years, thanks to a mail on Sunday investigation, Banks' fawning fans can't live to ignore this fact. Instead of calling him by his real name,

[00:38:00] Robin Guggenham, well he's one of the ones in the four and the running. I think it's either Robbie Banks or Robin Gunningham. Not Guggenham. There's a surreal omerita with his true identity deliberately camouflaged. I don't know. They have a picture of Robin Gunningham,

[00:38:25] and he looks like any British white man in white Adidas, well in tennis shoes, and then like an old school Adidas-looking running jacket and pants. Normal looking dude. Run of the mill. You'd never notice him. He says the... They all say it's this Robin guy.

[00:38:53] They know for a fact where he's from, because in this area, that's where it all started. And then they... So it could be, I don't know, termites, what do we think? I don't know. Definitely, yeah here's the girl. Instead of calling him by his real name,

[00:39:13] Robin Gunningham, this is... I don't know. It's either Robbie Banks or... So we know it's one of two guys. Leave it at that. Maybe it's both of them. Maybe one does one and the other does the other. Update! I've been waiting to read this since last week.

[00:39:33] The four meal of one. Oh no. I know I'm a little outdated on this because I forgot my article, but here's the thing. He has paid a terrible price for this thing to go on. I mean, some of them are thinking about leaving. Vegas? Yeah, they've had it.

[00:39:48] Like moving? Yeah. Go to Reno. Go to Tahoe. Get on down the road. Because it ruined the traffic. But it didn't just ruin it on the strip. And this shit's gonna go on for 10 years. This is just an update of what happened.

[00:40:06] For months, and this has been going on for months but it's still not totally dismantled. And it's also gonna affect our shows. Like any of us doing a show on the strip, that's why I'm not gonna say which casino.

[00:40:20] Well first of all, just a shout out to MGMs. My birthday is not November. I got a lot of emails from my MGM personal gambler supervisor. People that make sure that lady has free drinks a lot. She will lose all of her money at Videobooker.

[00:40:40] No, I got all this weird stuff from MGM on November 10th saying Happy birthday, Kathleen. Here's two free nights in Laughlin or whatever. I'm like, well then I started thinking shit. What if I wanted jackpot there? And then somebody messed up my social security.

[00:40:57] And then they have the wrong birthday. For months Las Vegas has re-bent. So anyway, if you are doing a show on the strip, you're gonna have emails giving away tickets to performers who tickets should not be being given away to.

[00:41:12] Which means nobody wants to come and deal with the strip. People that aren't staying on the strip, even if you are staying on the strip, do you feel like walking when they've cut down half the walkways? Like let's say no, I'm not gonna get in an Uber.

[00:41:25] I mean if it's a show, I'm dying to see yes. But if it's I'm on the fence, no, I'm not doing it. Las Vegas for months, they reconfigured the city to accommodate the Formula 1 race that took over its famous strip.

[00:41:38] But realizing the fear of locals, the event turned into a disaster. The financial disappointments to the hazards on the track itself, I'm sorry, from financial disappointments to the hazards on the track, Las Vegas Grand Prix fell short of its spectacular billing. When the event was announced last year,

[00:41:53] price for hotel rooms and race tickets were in the week of November 13th skyrocketed. But by earlier this week, the reporter was able to book a hotel at the room for the Flamingo for $18. Now, I got another email from some MGM property, circus circus was zero.

[00:42:16] Well, I thought you're homeless, can you just go in and go, hey man, I have a phone. I mean, I might be homeless, but I got a phone. I just got an email that said it's zero dollars to stay here. It was zero.

[00:42:27] And it wasn't just circus circus, Thursday practice session we're selling around $100 on Wednesday night and tickets for Friday's quality We're going $250 now also on that Friday night. Well, maybe it'll stay in here

[00:42:36] Some some pans didn't even get to see what see what they paid for on Thursday night practice got off to a disastrous starts When such-and-such driver Ran over a secured an improperly secured drain cover damaging the engine of his car the car caught on fire

[00:42:52] I mean because they forgot to do the manholes and then the irony is my friends who live in Vegas That's all they ever do is complain about the manholes. Oh For them to forget one on the track like look you may not be fixing ours the normal people

[00:43:06] But these people are going, you know seven thousand miles an hour Practice it was halted because they had to see if there were more manholes They fucked up by the time practice started It was 2 30 a.m. And then they sent out security forces to kick everyone out

[00:43:22] They were yelling at them. I mean it was like somebody put on Twitter Way to go F1. We've got diehard fans that stayed till 2 30 in the morning Let's send them thugs up there to yell at him and kick them out and they paid

[00:43:34] Yeah, they ran till 4 a.m. Those people probably would have stayed God it just it did not make the money and then how's it gonna get better when it starts at midnight? Right it Yeah, because a global audience so you're gonna you're just using Vegas as a set

[00:43:56] Vegas I want to know who got paid off for this a 10-year I cannot believe the casino owners got duped into this You're gonna wreck your business for months like if I was a cost tourist person and saw that this was going on

[00:44:09] I'd be like well. We better get some super cheap prices. I'm not putting up with that shit Yeah, like $200 they started out at 2,000 and then you had a promise to drink like every drink they had in the bar was ridiculous

[00:44:26] Why could but depends on how long I'd be there um How a Scottish schoolboy stumbled upon a treasure trove of ancient Egyptian artifacts in Fife There's actually a place called Fife. I did not know that I'm from the kingdom of fight

[00:44:46] After he was ordered to dig up potatoes as a punishment It's the kind of thing you might expect to find beneath the shifting sands of the old kingdom Instead this 4,000 year old Egyptian relic was uncovered in 1952 by a scots boy in a kingdom far closer to home

[00:45:04] Fife ordered to dig up potatoes as a punishment at his dull dull who's school in The grounds of Melville house he stumbled what? doll housey In the grounds of Melville house he stumbled across a

[00:45:26] Bulbas form he mistakenly took it for a potato, but it turned out to be the first of 18 antiquities Unearthed there over the next 30 years See that's such a that's such a 50s punishment get outside and dig to China. What?

[00:45:41] So my dad would do start your hole see if you can find I thought kids were gonna come out I was so excited Cuz my dad would go go in the bed if you're bored go dig to China

[00:45:50] So I'd start digging in the backyard holes everywhere. He didn't seem to mine Because if I hit rock I'd move on and he told me I could get to China And I thought there would be kids would come out that would be fun

[00:46:01] Yeah, but I had I had stuff ready soccer ball. I had things ready for them to do That's how convinced I was they were coming out Cuz I knew we couldn't speak to one another because I don't speak Chinese and I figured they probably don't know English either

[00:46:15] So I had activities Anyway Now the Edinburgh based National Museum of Scotland is telling the stories behind the treasures for the first time You do have to wonder how did these Egyptian things get there?

[00:46:29] One idea is that they belong to the Melville family who died a year after touring Egypt. Well, there you go His family spooked by the mummy curst tails may have buried the unlucky souvenirs. I would I wouldn't take anything out of Egypt

[00:46:43] Good for them good for them though. They finally figured it out This is crazy a horde of over 100,000 century old coins discovered in Japan Yep, and they're wrapped in bundles perfectly Archaeologists in Japan have unearthed a massive statue of about a hundred thousand coins

[00:47:06] in my Bashi a city 60 miles northwest of Tokyo The Horde was found during excavations ahead of the construction of a factory Only 334 of the coins have been examined so far with the oldest one originating from China and dating back to

[00:47:22] 175 BC and the most recent coin dating to AD 1265 the coins were found in 1060 bundles each bundle containing a thousand hundred coins The oldest coin has a Chinese inscription Banglang engraved on it ban Lang coins were commonly made in China around

[00:47:46] 2200 years ago and the inscription translates to half ounce Yep, wow The Japanese and in why did they bury him? They don't really know the hordes may have been Has functioned as a bank another theory it is hoarding heads symbolic meaning possibly religious

[00:48:06] I don't think you bury that many no no, it's like I'll throw 20 bucks in a coffin Yeah, so they got some cash when they get there wherever they're going

[00:48:18] I favor this guy who know the live science guys said I favor the theory that the coins were a type of bank for safe keeping Another see I always think it's war that they buried him during times of war you got to hide your shit

[00:48:30] They're coming they're heavy and bulky to take with you if you have to flee hostile forces Some scholars have proposed that the coins were buried as offerings to God. There's no scholarly

[00:48:41] Consensus mmm. Well, that's another thing where people just present theories and we're all just guessing so knock it off news news news Did you watch the Bob Ross documentary termites? I did Sad

[00:48:56] Yeah, you got to be in a super good mood to watch it because it's gonna drag you down a bit But now every time a Bob Ross painting sells I don't get happy for Bob Ross's kid

[00:49:05] I think of those evil fuckers that are taking the money and it's just disgusting During Bob Ross's lifetime he know you can't buy anything more they locked it off except this During Bob Ross's lifetime. He claimed he painted over 30,000 paintings

[00:49:20] But to fight that despite that very few ever for sale now fans of the latest artists have the opportunity to get their hands On a piece of art he created for the first episode of his show the joy of painting

[00:49:29] But it will cost a pretty penny the painting a walk in the woods is listed at 9.8 million by the Minneapolis based gallery modern artifact the pieces signed by Bob in the corner and includes a certificate of authenticity from Bob Ross ink. That's the evil doers Mm-hmm mm-hmm a

[00:49:50] Statement is also included from the first owner of PBS volunteer who was reportedly present when it was painted. I don't like it but I mean I Don't know maybe his kid will get some of it the kid needs to sue again. Yeah, try it again update

[00:50:08] No, I'm sorry. No update. I'm done. I I Wrote update on this and it's not I don't know why this makes me laugh so hard the Rolling Stones new concert tour is being sponsored by ARP

[00:50:22] It's appropriate and I like that they're just leaning into it and owning it look we're fucking old ARP members. This is the first ARP thing though that I've ever seen that I go Well, that's good. They get the presale code before other people now

[00:50:39] ARP starts sending you stuff when you're like, I Don't early well 45 Yeah And then I called my friend drew because I don't like to read hard stuff Drew knows everything about money or stuff like that and I always know talking to Drew is like talking to my dad

[00:50:59] It's gonna be a very long explanation with every detail ever unless you say you got a shorthand it I don't really give a shit about all that stuff Drew's like we have to understand they're primarily

[00:51:11] Primarily a political organization when they are they're lobbying but a lot of it's getting good They're lobbying on behalf of all people for lower prescription price and I'm like drew is it worth it?

[00:51:19] So I even knew to go online and I thought this is so funny. I'm like is joining ARP worth it There had been a thousand message boards about why it's not worth it Why it is worth it

[00:51:30] But there was a lot of hate a lot of trolls. There are movie discounts are bullshit It doesn't even pop up up up so I read all this and I had not even googled how much is it?

[00:51:39] It's like $16 who bother now. Why don't Google? What is ARPA year? It's something It's not a big deal like just spend it, you know or don't but to sit there and write on message boards What's wrong with it? $9 a year If if I go five years Yeah

[00:52:01] And people took the time to get on a message board and type hate out this bullshit this money I spent I thought it was gonna be like $700 the way they were typing

[00:52:11] But anyway, this is the first thing I've heard like I don't they try to send you a free tote bag It looks like a gym bag from 1968. I mean what the fuck you guys

[00:52:21] You can't just do you think old people are gonna be like oh, there's my gym bag from high school They're not gonna get excited No, even people by parents age have free luggage from their kids. That's that's not a winner

[00:52:35] Call it sympathy for the seniors and a pairing of over 60 years in the making then not so retiring rolling stones will be hitting the road in 2024 on a tour back by ARP. That's right. Mick Jagger 80 Keith Richards

[00:52:48] Who will be 80 this month and Ronnie Woods 76 young young pigeons lying are throwing in with ARP? The organization once known as American Association of Retired People It's still known is that isn't it which is sponsoring their stones tour 24 hackney diamonds

[00:53:07] Kicking off April 28th in Houston. It's a two-month stadium trek Which includes a headlining show at the New Orleans Jazz Festival on May 2nd and Met Lifestyle in East Rutherford, New Jersey On May 23rd before wrapping up in Santa Clara California on July 17th

[00:53:24] The band released its first LP of original material. I'll have to go listen to that. Yeah, I haven't heard it Since the death of their beloved drummer reflecting on 18 years blah blah blah

[00:53:38] Hackney diamonds hackney is too hard for Americans. It's a hard word to say hackney. Is it hackneyed? No, it's not it's hackney Yeah, hackney diamonds. Where are you going? Are you gonna go to the concert?

[00:53:52] They're rolling stones you're on your hackney diamonds tour. That's a hard one for Midwest people with the heartache Yeah, I mean my friend I'll just say it. I'm friends with Greg Gumbel the sports announcer He loves them

[00:54:09] He loves comedy too. He's gonna be so excited that they're going back out on tour Well, I don't know if he ever joined ARP. I haven't gotten that personal with Greg I'll text him No offense, but I mean I could be a member too. So just saying I

[00:54:31] Just don't want a free gym bag. I don't want you mailing me shit That's why I wanted Drew to tell me is there any good should I support them?

[00:54:38] But at that time I still thought it was like a seven hundred or a thousand dollars because people were so mad On these message board they tricked me Grandpa, it's nine dollars nobody tricked you Um All right, this made me laugh really hard

[00:54:55] So there was this dog. I like it when Rescue places are just honest Because sometimes these things are true whether it sucks or not If I had more ice I'd have more they knock bottom on ice

[00:55:11] Asshole dog finds his forever home after shelters advert says we want him out. I Just love a funny ad for a cute but grumpy dog went viral and got him adopted within hours by by the perfect couple that's able to handle 17 pound Eddie's asshole personality

[00:55:33] The only dog I've ever thought could be an asshole My brother had a doxin Red haired long-haired day beautiful red hair if you could bottle that color you'd be a zillator

[00:55:44] Lukey could be an asshole. It wasn't an asshole a time some best dog worst dog ever, but when he wanted to be an asshole One time I found him on top there was a lazy Susan in the lake

[00:55:58] There was this Lake shitty little condo that we shared all of us and There was lazy Susan and there were best suckers from a bank those dumb dumb things a shit ton of them and Lukey I guess was mad because everybody was gone so long

[00:56:15] He was on in the lazy Susan Standing like a meerkat and he'd taken a shit in the thing and he was eating one of the suckers He had unwrapped the sucker and he threw the wrapper down to fat Jack

[00:56:28] He was another dox and it was too fat to get up there So he gave him his pitonces his pittance to you Jack and he threw him a wrapper and Jack's on the ground Good-glicking the wrapper and there's Lukey

[00:56:39] Like to walk in to see a dog standing up eating a sucker and it's also shit in your lazy Susan That's what I'm talking about an asshole move. It's one thing to get on the lazy Susan and eat the suckers Lukey, but a

[00:56:52] Couple saw the funniest ad online and immediately hopped into their car to make a doggy dream come true for a sweet Patsassi pup named Eddie Eddie was living in a shelter that knew

[00:57:01] The anxious and little loud dog needed a quiet home where he'd be the center of attention So they posted a hilarious ad that quickly went up for viral For its went viral for its dog shaming content. This is the ad this is Eddie

[00:57:13] By the way, it's a doxin mix black thing doesn't really look all doxiny at all But some boy doxin This is Eddie Eddie is an asshole that he made society of Wichita County It's in Texas set on Facebook about the one-year-old doxin make

[00:57:30] Eddie hates other dogs. He's 17 pounds and could take on a Rottweiler and win if Eddie had an accent He would sound like he's from the Bronx wearing a wife beater t-shirt and a tattoo that says mom on his arm

[00:57:42] If you got you got into a bar fight Eddie would back you up take on all four or five guys Put a cigarette out on their forehead and not struck drop a spill a drop of beer while doing it

[00:57:53] Next to the ad was a photo of Eddie wearing a little jacket And he's got big black eyes and the signature short legs that come with the breed Describing him as a New York mom member inside of a body of a cute little pupper

[00:58:04] Seemed to work as a drew plenty of tension and gathered plenty of shares the shelter ended the challenge So if you think you're a man enough to adopt him, please be our guest We want Eddie out of here because he scares our big dogs

[00:58:17] Yeah, they said he could take on a Rottweiler he's and then these people um went and got him But it's a they said he's very mild. He is can be mild manner with this a different shelter had him for a while

[00:58:31] And they said he was mild manner, so I don't know who's lying there Yeah, a few days you can follow him I don't know what his thing is though a few days after being adopted his owners wrote another date gray date gray with my humans

[00:58:45] Got a belly full belly in a buzz only gotten one. I got in trouble today was from chain smoking They the family showed off asshole Eddie t-shirts for their now thousands of followers, that's funny

[00:59:01] Yeah, it's a cute little guy. Yeah, his head doesn't look doxin at all his body does his head looks like a lab Yeah, like a little black lab. Yeah This dog is an asshole In and out burger

[00:59:19] I think it's mostly a west coast thing right that's where I ate them in California the first time I Love in and out guess who's getting one Tennessee They're gonna invest 125 million in his first expansion east of Texas

[00:59:34] Now here's the thing if you're not a weird sauce person if you're gonna go to in and out say sauce on the side I think it tastes like a Like a sweet Thousand Island tangy. I do not like the sauce the burger though worth the wait It's delicious

[00:59:52] It's gonna be in Franklin Which is a rich the rich area which is not where I have my place in Nashville, so I'll have to drive I'm out with the retirees and then rednecks Out in the country It is where I belong

[01:00:10] There's very few rules here and no one gives a shit and the best thing in town is the bar by my house has a Baloney sandwich fried baloney sandwiches so good Took me a while to get used to southern Um

[01:00:26] Yeah, I have to cut it in fours. It's a little too much Mattel has released and Sold out of the new Mariah Carey Barbie doll Yeah, it's currently being sold on eBay for doubly racial price aside from my gay guy friends who love her Christmas thing

[01:00:44] And then time their house to that I'm not sure I Don't know. I mean Mariah Care is fine. I just don't see her being like a cult person Like a stevie necks or a take a cut where they have their own little cult Yeah, it's sold out

[01:01:02] She's held as one of the best solo reverse all time okay It's a Barbie signature holiday celebration with the queen. Oh and it's the Queen of Christmas Okay, well I get it

[01:01:13] Then they're all gonna want that so if you wanted one you got to go on eBay if you're a Mariah Carey person I could go either way. Don't really care about her. Do you want to buy Mozart's castle? Well, I'm gonna tell you

[01:01:30] It's a sprawling estate and aside from the 50 rooms as in HGTV talk oh and this house has a bonus room and it's a dungeon Wouldn't call it open open floor living or what do they call it open? Yeah, it's definitely not an open concept this 50 room

[01:01:59] Shit show crazy town. This castle is not an open concept plan on many tiny rooms many fireplaces And a dungeon that'll freak you out if you get locked in it This sprawling estate is a symphony of space

[01:02:12] It's about to go up for sale at the foot of an Austrian ski town known as simmering a Historic castle that served as the final home of the late great composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart was soon hit the auction block Built in 1130

[01:02:29] Yeah, okay, so have they done any updates? I could just see that on HGTV everything looks kind of old I mean, I know it's all but like The approximately 900 year old adobe has a total of 50 rooms spread over its palatial

[01:02:45] 26,900 square feet which are set on 3.7 acres of land It went under partial redesigns in the 15th and 17th centuries and has over the year hosted such famous visitors as Napoleon in his hat. I wonder if they had a hat rack. Please remove you

[01:03:02] Please please put it on the hat rack. Thank you Pope Pius the sixth Princess Isabella von bourbon Palmer and yeah, I like von bourbon And Emperor Franz Steven von Lothringen It previously listed for 13 million. I think that's cheap For 50 rooms in four acres Right

[01:03:33] How's the heat the plumbing, you know if you're not on the main floor you're gonna turn on that faucet. It's just to be one drip The owner is one of the few in low lower Austria still in private hands the land so it's being so rough

[01:03:51] It's a listing by Stotheby's international reality, which will be accepting bids December 1st termites you want to put a bid in it's my mom's birthday December 1st The four-story residence boasts a slate of amenities familiar to modern buyers including a cinema library an extensive space for

[01:04:09] entertaining as well as uniquely old-school offerings like a chapel and a dungeon It also of course boasts a significant part of musical history It was at this castle that Mozart completed his famous requiem in 1792

[01:04:23] Which is because it was one of the most valuable manuscripts in the world. I didn't think he finished requiem. I thought he died There's something he didn't finish right maybe it was a gardening maybe it was just chores

[01:04:35] No, I think it was the requiem. I thought we never finished requiem or what he didn't which one didn't he finish? Oh here In D minor in D minor Mozart died in the year prior 1791 at age 35 leaving requiem his final masterpiece unfinished

[01:04:54] Right. Well, then why are they saying completed? Jesus terrible journalism is just terrible Can't trust you people in which he completed his famous requiem. We didn't complete it Oh

[01:05:10] Who and how the work was completed and delivered to the count who'd come oh somebody else completed it in the following year is one of music's greatest mysteries

[01:05:24] Yeah, but it depends I don't know requiem, but if it's like landslide and there's just one thing left she just sings landslide again Right Oh They also have businesses on the property castle shop club salon and experience the it up

[01:05:43] So, you know what when this sells termites don't say I didn't tell you to get your bid in by December 1st It's on you We're gonna do a helpful we got I see The Vatican I've been to the Vatican Oh the Vatican's worth the price of admission

[01:06:06] Yeah, but now they've organized it better You can go online and get a time and all this stuff when I went you had to go stand in line before it opened Just like old-timey things then my mom informed me after waiting out there

[01:06:17] I think I already told this story about an hour in the heat and her knee was bad She was scheduled for knee replacement. So she's hobbling around and then one of her teeth fell out So she wouldn't smile so picture for work

[01:06:32] Can we glue the tooth back in we've got a week and a half left and you're Anyway, she informed me halfway through that her nun friend could have got us well Liz could have gotten us like in there

[01:06:45] No problem. I'm like I would have flown this do we need her here? Can I fly her now? Can I call Liz and go? What are you doing? According to my sister it's run a lot better

[01:06:59] And I love that will take cash at least they would when I went for the first time ever The Vatican is allowing the public to enter an acropolis on November 17th

[01:07:08] It opened a gate along its walls to enter the ancient Roman burial grounds that lie beneath Vatican City It is replete with a marble sarcophagi sarcophagi Open burial graves in Roman mosaics and frescoes the tombs date between the first and fourth century they contain them

[01:07:25] Remains of slaves freedmen artesians of the city of Rome So if you want to go down there previously the only people that could access an acropolis were approved scholars and specialists The public can now experience the city of the dead through the entrance

[01:07:40] for the exhibition life and death of Rome in Rome of the Seas Oz it's located outside Rome proper. So that's how much they own It's crazy St. Peter's the whole thing is crazy even if you're not Catholic you should go in just to see the st. Peter's

[01:07:56] I mean and then you could then they really truly had a sign Was it craziest day when we went because my mom's like maybe we'll see the Pope I'm like mom it we're not gonna see the pope right sure shit. He was leaving and I'm waiting

[01:08:10] I'm waiting that we're waiting in this long line to get into the Sistine Chapel and I look out the window He's right there. It was crazy was like see the real Mickey Mouse or something

[01:08:20] I'm like look he's got his shoes on the red products and yeah, and they had an umbrella over him It was not raining. I guess the heat because he's old. I don't remember which pope it was

[01:08:31] But yeah, he got in his little car and off he went and then on the news that night in Rome I go turn on the news see where he went and they had food that was him sure enough

[01:08:40] But yeah to go in the Sistine Chapel and all that but then as we're winding through this line to go in the Sistine Chapel They actually had like a

[01:08:47] Like one of those silver things that's black and then has the white lettering that you click into the old timey thing It said secret archives this way. I don't think we should be doing that Catholics priest a lot of secrets Let's not advertise I

[01:09:05] It's located outside Rome proper as the Roman law dictated the cremation of barrels take place beyond city limits as a safety and a hygiene precaution It was uncovered in 1956. Jesus. They didn't keep his secret that long during the construction of the Vatican auto park oh the garage

[01:09:25] Auto poco The site spans roughly 10,764 square feet along a section of the ancient via triumph Alice Yeah, so if you're heading to Rome get your ticket for that too sure it's online All right, we're gonna end with this Oh ghost bagging okay, yeah, I do have that I

[01:09:50] Never heard of this and we're gonna have talk about this because I don't understand how it's possible What is ghost bagging three women are arrested at the national airport and part of ghost bag operation

[01:10:01] By the way, the national airport which I used to speak very highly of because I use it a lot Thankfully I come from the hillbilly side and I don't live where the rich people live on purpose Their side to get into the airport

[01:10:15] People are getting out of their cars and walking It's so dangerous because they're building a new cell phone lot and this and that But they didn't think of what the people should do I shouldn't even advertise it

[01:10:25] They should drive past the airport come down to two more exits and then go back Yeah, but they don't know that and then they get stuck in the line and then people are panicked Yeah, there's over Thanksgiving weekend

[01:10:37] There's this video after video after people just getting out roller suitcase and trying to they don't even know how far They got a walk It's a long way. Yeah three women at the were arrested at the national international airport

[01:10:50] For allegedly participating in what police are calling a ghost bag operation Southwest Airlines notified offered officers over the weekend About a bag that arrived in Nashville, but no one flew with it inside See I don't get that though

[01:11:07] Okay inside the bang they've the bag they found brand new Lulu lemon clothes. Oh great receipt a forged driver's license and a credit card three women Arrived at being at the airport to pick up the bag and according to police inside the car

[01:11:22] The police found twenty thousand dollars with the gift cards and nine thousand dollars with the receipts and merchandise and ten credit cards Please say the blue and we're Buying clothes using stolen credit card information then they return them to different stores to get cash or store credit

[01:11:36] Ghosts bag is a check bag onto an airplane that arrives at its destination, but a person doesn't travel with it Then someone else waits at the arrival point to take the luggage from a carousel This process is used way to transport drugs and carry out illegal activity

[01:11:51] Why would think you have to do it on Southwest because you can act your weird places Why you have to do it on Southwest? I thought they I thought

[01:12:00] That for every person on a plane well, I mean I do fly Southwest sometimes but Delta mostly if I can that's my favorite It's only the initial you have to board the initial flight. Oh the initial flight So if you're connecting through Houston

[01:12:14] To get to Nashville you get off the plane. Oh if I get off the flight in Houston if I'm connecting I just get off yeah, or you don't look at your bag and they don't realize I got off The bag is not that much communication between baggage and

[01:12:32] Here's what I've never understood there is not one bit of security in baggage claim They have all this TSA bullshit upstairs and all this crap blah blah blah if you wanted to I'm just saying

[01:12:44] First of all, I've always thought about it in places where expensive shits arriving like Denver Snowskis golf bags in the summer a set of golf clubs is worth $2,000 if it's a normal decent men's set

[01:12:55] There's no one down their guard. You could go take any bag if you're you might get caught Well, you still have to show a tag to get out Lax you didn't after what no no no they canceled all that

[01:13:09] All right termites you got to show your tag to get out at lax I just don't understand why homeless people don't go in there and steal shit. It's wide open. I'm not I'm not

[01:13:18] You know endorsing that I'm just saying it's an obvious or terrorism. Oh, okay. Don't go upstairs That's the message loud and clear you when you drop people off if you drop them off down by baggage claim There's there's nobody down there in every airport for the most part

[01:13:36] I Don't want the government coming after me. Maybe I should edit that I'm just saying it's a glaring hole in security from a normal person set of eyes

[01:13:47] We've learned that TSA in the airport don't track ghost bags all bags that are checked or carried onto a plane or screened by TSA for explosives and weapons TSA is not able to determine if the bags are stolen

[01:14:00] If the items inside the bag are stolen from its normal scanning machines Well, of course not not if it's Lulu lemon clothes It's not uncommon. However, it's harder. However, it's hard to tell how much it happens Once the bag is checked and makes it to the carer carousel

[01:14:15] It lies in the hand of the airline and they may not be able to monitor who picks it up Right, right. Yeah Every airline handles it differently the passenger sending a ghost bag was on Southwest Southwest does not require a passenger to

[01:14:30] Be on a domestic flight for their bag to be put on the plane. Are you kidding? Every other airline you have to be on the plane That's why I don't like checking luggage because if you want to get off if there's a mechanical problem or something

[01:14:43] You want to jump on a different light you can't cuz your bags there? That's why I would suggest termites Don't check luggage if you don't have to it gives you all the freedom in the world

[01:14:51] If you check your bag apparently not on Southwest but on other what I would call normal airlines If your bags on that flight you can't go get on another flight and they know it right Many passengers fly out of then I said they had fun

[01:15:07] Uncomfortable having unattended bags. I thought oh, you didn't even know you did shut up It's kind of scary that yeah, I would think in this day and age You can't put a piece of luggage on a plane and then not get on it

[01:15:20] Well when Southwest says okay, we're gonna have 136 passengers. That's who's supposed to get on and then they count Why don't you? Why don't they know that they don't I don't know Well, it sounds specific to them Ghost begging I like the term though

[01:15:42] We're gonna do this as a little holiday to goodbye What's not a goodbye, but this is gonna teach you guys a lesson that I need to Hangover from red wine Science may finally be able to answer

[01:15:58] Why some are left with splitting headaches I as time has gone on can only drink Pinot noir that's so thin it looks like Kool-Aid Because I get terrible hangovers and then people go oh, it's the Detanins and then other people say no

[01:16:14] It's this but like you'd have to pay me to I love drinking But if it's a glass of Merlot or a Diet Coke, I'm taking the soda. I can't I can't drink it

[01:16:23] It's too thick right Lou. I don't know how can Lewis do it Lewis would you could drink a bottle in half a Merlot would be totally fine What makes if some sumptuous holiday didn't complete for many people?

[01:16:36] It's the splitting red wine headache that follows medical researchers and wine lovers alike have tried for thousands of years to determine What causes some people to get throbbing headache even after drinking a small amount? Yes of Merlot It didn't used to be like that though In my 30s

[01:16:55] Some people blame sulfites I've heard that which are naturally present in wines and are added by some wine makers as a Preservative but sulfites are also present in food like fruits, especially dried. I don't eat dried fruit who the fuck

[01:17:08] Mean that's just like we're we are we've crashed in the Andy and he's mountain and there's nothing but dried Bananas that chips that were on the plane. Okay. I'll eat them soy sauce I never get hangover for soy sauce

[01:17:22] As well as in white wines, but those aren't typically live linked to headaches, right? Others experts point to histamine Histamines as a culprit, but that theory doesn't seem to hold water a study from the journey Journal of allergy and clinical immunology

[01:17:38] Found there's no correlations between histamine content of wine and wine intolerance But a new study from researchers at the University of California Davis Proposes that the real cause of Ryan red wine headaches is the amount that Kathleen Madigan drinks of the red wine

[01:17:55] They say the real cause of the red wine headaches don't have the whole box Kathleen I'm kidding is a flavor. It's a flavin all known as Kyrsatin I'm not saying that right Q u e r c e t i n It's an antioxidant which has many health benefits

[01:18:15] It's even sold as a supplement, but combined with alcohol Kyrsatin changes into a toxic compound known as Wine salde hide that can break down That can break down of alcohol the toxin Whatever that one is can quickly accumulate in the body causing a headache within a few hours

[01:18:36] I'm not doing science this person who wrote it did it I Yeah, all right termites um here's where I'm going oh, yeah, I gotta do my coats

[01:18:49] I'll tell you I'm going first off and then we'll sign out with the quotes and then we'll let you off to your own devices November this week leaving tomorrow at the crack of dawn Eugene Portland Seattle the villages then I'm off Thank God

[01:19:11] Baby cat will be so happy Yeah January which it taught Tulsa Santa Rosa Wheatland Santa Lucia baseball Monterey Birmingham, Alabama Atlanta tickets are so great there. Thank you Atlanta Atlantans Atlanta eons Atlantians The best is yours paddle Calgarians

[01:19:33] That sounds right out of Star Trek if you're from Calgary. I'm a Calgarian Doesn't St. Louis and doesn't sound nearly as good Nash Villian sounds like no no Calgarians

[01:19:46] Wharf to the deck please I feel like we're going to be attacked soon by the Calgarians does anyone have a backup plan Scottsdale, Arizona Chad new go pop pop pop. I love Chad new go I would live there if it had more flights

[01:20:06] As national's gotten kind of crowded. I like to be like out with the weird people Huntsville, Alabama So fun Royal Oak two nights Friday Detroit. I will see you at the Royal here

[01:20:20] Saturday to not I love being in same city for two nights. It's just such a treat Dayton Ohio Indy San Antonio Where I will go to Austin Texas Marriott Ohio Cincinnati, Ohio Territown, New York

[01:20:38] Wilmington Delaware and Thousand Oaks and then there's a ton more that have already been booked and I'm gonna book all the opening acts I'm gonna spread it out and see everybody that's fun. So you termites get a super good show I don't ever screw I don't ever skimp

[01:20:50] When people go oh should we get there for the opener? Yes, you should always get there for my opener Because they're great. They're mostly headliners in clubs and stuff. They just haven't

[01:20:59] Got into the theater level, but they will some of them are already already taking their wings and head flight Dusty sleigh go go. Oh, he's very funny We're gonna do a te te quote On instagram july 18 2016 I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative

[01:21:23] Yep, okay. That's on the way to greatness I tell you that's a polite way of saying quit talking about my ass dolly little quote here On never giving up on dreams in an interview with abc news video

[01:21:44] Conducted by robin robbers for the abc news special dolly part and here she comes again My lawyer's in account and said a lot of people that I was working with at the time

[01:21:53] Said I was making a big mistake, but I just knew I was right and I got rid of all those people Started over with new people that did believe in my dreams

[01:22:02] Thank god my wonderful agent hidey believes in my dreams or I'd make a phone call right now And go i'm getting rid of you That's the the just say this one last thing so I love the show good morning football

[01:22:15] And then uh there then I love first take I love everything on that channel But I and I don't even know which show shannon sharp is on But everybody made fun of y'all and thought because the way they talk

[01:22:24] Like it's hung just go the melee miles and out and he was talking about um the carolina panthers being so bad They're awful. I feel sorry for them and uh, they're that bad that I

[01:22:34] They fired everybody this week. Well, it's fucking week what nine or ten a little late in the day for that but You got to start somewhere. I guess um he goes

[01:22:45] I like steven a smith because he so much hates the delt's cowboys and deck press got that he just Rebels in it for like an hour. I told you all he is not the quarterback that jay don't think he is He just goes a just completely crazy

[01:23:01] But shannon sharp was everybody on everybody on that team the terrible the terrible If you said you got a boyfriend or a girlfriend and they acting a fool you get rid of them You get a new one. I was like wow

[01:23:13] I want to start saying that to people that i'm gonna fire. You know what you acting a fool You act a fool you're gonna get fired. That's how that rolls In catalympic and comedy world you're gonna act a fool I find a different one

[01:23:30] My fantasy team is doing great in the medium league I'm doing very poorly in the expensive league Um, that's what the older nephews the 20-somethings. They don't have shit today. Fuck off at work all day They're making trades all day

[01:23:43] Secret things then they're talking shit on the app. They've even got time to do that. I haven't even learned how to talk shit I know how to read it, but I don't know how I respond

[01:23:52] I don't have time and then in the children league. Um, the children's league. It's just destination They're all gonna cry is that I around right after christmas. They're gonna have to fork over all the money Yeah

[01:24:04] Sad times you want to gamble for the rest of your life. That's why when people go you gamble a lot kathleen. I do Are you up or you're down? I'm like ask me on my deathbed

[01:24:14] This is a lifelong thing. Yeah, you can't take it one thing at a time. You'll get too sad You got a forage on Keep betting although Dave portney the guy from barstool sports apparently made a bet on the bill's game when the eagles won in

[01:24:28] Uh end there and it was a great game He says the nfl's rigged he made a bet so big he said he's never gonna gamble again

[01:24:35] But his father also said yeah, well he said that before like implying, you know, Dave's got a little bit of a gambling problem Right. He's the kathleen madigan school. I've done you know how many times I've left a casino going

[01:24:47] I am never playing craps or video poker again Then I wake up up seven have a cup of coffee. I'm like, I bet there's nobody down there at my machine I bet my machine's open and then you know who's there people my mom's age

[01:24:59] Because they're like if you get up super early and go to the hot machines All the drunks put all their money in the night before and my mom's theory worked

[01:25:07] She early gambler lots of jackpots. It just doesn't seem that fun because there's like the music's not right yet It's just all it's a super old people my mom. Well, I woke up at four and I got so excited

[01:25:20] She stayed in my room one time at the mgm and like at four in the morning. I just hear She's in the other bed. I'm like I can hear that right i'm awake now I bet there's nobody down there me too. It's four in the morning

[01:25:32] Okay, there's not even drunks left even the drunks gave up mom That's why we should go down there right now. Well, can I get a nap later?

[01:25:44] And I had shows and i'm like I can't bring these yahoos on the road with me or they have to get their own room I need to be able to sleep past four a.m Not p.m. Like a lot of comics would say

[01:25:56] All right termites so have a good week get your Christmas things ready It's Christmas time. We've officially rolled into the season um My tree lot had more left than I thought I because I well I went back because I got a flocked wreath

[01:26:11] I didn't get a flock tree And I didn't have time to pick it up before Thanksgiving and all that so I went back He's still a lot of trees up usually the last time after Thanksgiving weekend

[01:26:19] They were all like just slim pickins left. So I don't know what's happening. Maybe they're Maybe you got more trees this year Yeah norm it's norms. No julia. All right termites