Episode 142: Toasting TayTay’s Eras Tour, Rare Blue Dragons, & Waffle House Lottery Drama

[00:00:00] Hey everybody, it's me Kathleen Madigan. Welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool, let's talk about what's been going on. Termites! Episode 142. Yeah, maybe turn off a little bit that panel. Just a little bit. One, two, three, four. That's perfect. Okay.

[00:00:32] Termites! Episode 142. So many things. So many things. What are we starting out with? Well, what are we drinking? I'm drinking this, the Tailgate Philly Standard Punch, because this came backstage at the Borgata.

[00:00:47] I forgot to say too, somebody made the coolest clock ever at the Borgata and said, as Madigan's Pubcast is at LED light, I didn't plug it in as of yet, but it's being mailed.

[00:00:56] So if you sent that, because it was a lot of effort put in, it's going to go right there instead of my broken and hazard-bush horses. They're broken.

[00:01:05] I got to find either someone to fix that or because when it lights up and stuff, it's very cool but it's very old and it's broken. I could donate it to you. I could do that.

[00:01:15] So that's what we're drinking. So many things, but let's just get to what are we eating? Well, this is from a termite. This is very interesting. So I love Lay's, Potato Ships, as everybody knows.

[00:01:27] She found these, I think it's a she? Yeah. Sumo? Is that right? Am I reading that? Yeah. She found it in the, I think, yeah, Sumo. Sumo. Okay.

[00:01:46] Anyway, she found these in an international, I did not know there was an international market in Dallas. But anyway, they're Lay's and they have Chinese riding on them. It says Made in China and they're Beef Wellington.

[00:01:57] Nice. Yeah. And she gave me some big four stickers. Nice. Oh my God. That is the only Lay's I've ever tasted that's better than the original.

[00:02:12] What? Nice. It actually tastes like beef. You have to move to Asia. Wow. Wow, well, yeah. These are great. I'm going to have to go next time I'm in Dallas to the international market.

[00:02:25] Wow. I didn't even know Lay's was, I don't know, I thought it was more just an American thing. Are they in Canada? Yes. Really? Yes. But you guys don't even like them. You like the other ones? Old Dutch.

[00:02:37] Old Dutch. Wow. Well, these are delicious. Well done. And speaking of Lay's, this made me laugh really hard. This is from Pat. I don't say last name, just in case people don't know. Hope this bag makes you smile.

[00:02:55] But according, chocolate is not the answer. But according to your dad, a big bag of Lay's is, and look at this, it's a Lay's purse. Stop it. A Lay's potato chip purse. Yeah.

[00:03:07] Which will go super well with my new Taco Bell slides which I will be putting on Instagram. And then my friend Avi who's helping me build stuff out the yard was like he came over to check on stuff and he goes, are those Taco Bell slides?

[00:03:22] He said they were Crocs. I'm like, they're not Crocs. They're Slides. And yes, I think he was super jealous. This is adorable. This will now be in my suitcase carrying something. Chargers maybe.

[00:03:34] I'm not giving it to my dad. Who's doing better, by the way. Yeah, it's going to be a project. Jackalope's going to be, he's been my summer project. Let's get back in the game, Jackalope.

[00:03:52] And my mom's very tired, but everything else is fine. So some termites sent me this. This made me laugh too. Beagle socks. I looked for the El Chapo cat socks, but unfortunately didn't see it next time. This is from Kim and a big foot hat.

[00:04:09] Yeah, there's a lot of stuff I haven't got to. And the post office, yeah, ladies are yelling at me and everyone's yelling at me, but I've not been very organized except for my shows. I've been organized off to by time you hear this already have no on my way to New Hampshire.

[00:04:25] Right now. Right. Yes, I'm leaving well right now after the thunderstorm. This made me laugh really hard too and then we'll get moving on. This came from Mike in New York. It says Pawsome way.

[00:04:43] This will be hung up here somewhere too. It's like a license plate material, like a street sign. That's very cool.

[00:04:50] There was a thing on Instagram, a nature thing I follow or whatever as a picture of a baby possum and said we are your friends. They can they can withstand with Stan like eight rattlesnake bikes so we get a bite so we get a lot of our anti-venom from them.

[00:05:07] And then all the good things possums do. They do wonderful things. So everybody I'm going to read this one next week. This is a wedding invitation. No, well, their teeth just look aggressive. But after I held that one backstage, it's the sweetest thing ever. I'm serious.

[00:05:27] This came from a termite and I don't know who because everything is very well it's not anymore. I've cleaned a lot up but I didn't have the time. I'm really excited. It's dirty mustard some sort of sauce. It's from Portland, Maine. There's another city I got.

[00:05:43] I tell the agent folks, let's get back to Portland. I love it there. That's where I saw the most beautiful boat ever was named Kathleen and I think I should be able to steal it. Yeah, it's had my name on it. What Coast Guard people looking for proof.

[00:06:00] Oh, wow. It's hot. It's like a Carolina barbecue sauce. It's really good. Yeah. Old time Southern hospitality smoking and tying. Yeah, the martini of Mustards. It's delicious. Wow. Two out of two this week. Well done termite. Well done.

[00:06:28] I may eat another bite of that before we get back. We got to get going here. So many things.

[00:06:32] I've even decided Queen Tei Tei is going to get her own little podcast from me. I'm going to review because I think a lot of termites don't really care about Taylor. Paddles, it was the greatest 90 of your life. You and 73,999 other children.

[00:06:57] I'm going to do a review though, because so much of it. It just was a it was a phenomenon. I can't I try to think and I'm just going to do a separate one. So if you like Tei Tei, I'm going to do 10 or 15 minutes extra little bonus podcast and then for the people that are like I don't really care about her. You don't have to sit through that.

[00:07:21] But if you want to hear about what it was like from start to finish, then whatever will title it Tei Tei review or Taylor review. It was it was just it's inexplicable.

[00:07:34] All I do know for sure is I'm glad I'm not another woman out on tour. Right now, because right now, I would have said to my agents can we go when she goes to Europe, get the hell out of dodge because you're not like Beyonce was in Nashville she got some coverage but it's not going to be like pinks out there.

[00:07:57] You are actually. I'm I don't count. I comedy never counts. All those country people are out there by country people. You know who you are, you know who I mean. I don't know Miranda Lambert was in trouble now for yelling at some people.

[00:08:15] I don't blame her. Honestly, the people these ladies.

[00:08:24] I don't know what it's like to stand up there and sing songs. I know what it's like to talk and whatever I honestly people are going to take pictures people are going to take videos I don't I ask people not to just because once it goes on the internet like let's say I hate the picture of myself it's just there forever but whatever

[00:08:42] and people sneak and do their things and it's just expected but these women stood up and faced the audience so they're they were very close to the stage their backs are to her and they're taking selfies while she's singing.

[00:08:57] That is rude. Yeah, I and I don't know how much. I mean at least Miranda didn't have something thrown at her a lot of people are just getting shit thrown at him left.

[00:09:07] I guess you should be thankful for that but should people be allowed to but I would not do that I would not stand up with my back.

[00:09:16] That person is here. Miranda Lambert can see you it's like in comedy we always go I can hear you like when there's people going usually drunk eat the clowns over stimulated.

[00:09:26] I don't get it as much now that I do my own shows and people by tickets to see me but I went through it in the clubs for 1520 years where people just

[00:09:35] but that to turn your back and then just act like I don't know I kind of I don't disagree. Wholeheartedly I think she's kind of right that would be fucking weird. Yeah, like it's just as they're acting like she's not there.

[00:09:54] It's just rude manners. It's not good manners. Now is did you pay for your ticket? Can you do whatever you want to an extent? It was a slow song everybody else was sitting down and now you're blocking other people because you're going to do your selfie machine.

[00:10:09] So Queen news except for Taytay and I'm going to go over the countries on the extra bonus podcast to review the Taylor Swift show. The countries that are begging Taylor to come because she changes the economy.

[00:10:28] We went in Denver $28 million in revenue was there and the Yankees were in town. Holy shit show. And my friends Bob and Clark made their own shirts. I'll tell you all about that and then we because we're old.

[00:10:45] We're not familiar about the trading policies and I gave Bob a mirror ball necklace this one and then some kid was like I'll trade you this for that and then he's like well I don't know I mean what do we do?

[00:10:57] I'm like no Bob when the children demand it you have to do it. That seems to be the running speed here.

[00:11:04] If that child wants your necklace you pick something off her that you want and then you say that's what I want and you don't sit here and negotiate and blah blah blah blah blah.

[00:11:12] And the other this is this will not be part of the Taytay but I was standing in line to get I just didn't want a beer and Bud Light makes this pink lemonade seltzer which I thought would be good.

[00:11:24] No it's way too sweet heads up for you people who think it might taste like a caught pink lemonade Cosmo. And they only let you buy cans that are this large so it's going to be hot three fourths away down.

[00:11:39] But I was standing in line and I thought is that my friend Mandy Matney from the murder murders podcast who I've then since met in Charleston at my shows and going out to have a drink with her husband David.

[00:11:51] And I thought nah that can't be and then she walked around I saw her again and it was Mandy.

[00:11:58] Yeah I took a picture I forgot to post it I'll get on it so I'm going to save this one for the it was just in a brief thing she played for four hours so for everybody who spent all their money you got beyond your money's worth.

[00:12:14] And I'll say the rest of it on the bonus one because I know a lot of people are like you know they're not really over the moon about all.

[00:12:25] I will say this though for the people that are older listening to this podcast all of the words that Taylor sings are empowering and they are defiant and all in a good way and they tell those kids don't put up with any shit.

[00:12:43] Here's what you're going to do and then they sing them back like an anthem.

[00:12:47] And I mean they watch out because there's 73,000 in each city they're going to grow up and find a partner and that partner is going to be shocked at how much self esteem this one has.

[00:12:57] Holy crap. Hey can you take out the trash well that depends how many things do you think you've done today like it's gonna they're going to be little hot wires but it made me laugh because they're all singing words of empowerment.

[00:13:10] And I thought my age I didn't even know what I was singing like I've been through the desert on a horse with no name. What? What am I singing? It made no sense.

[00:13:22] Nothing I don't never been to the desert at that point in my life. I don't have a horse if I did it would have a name. None of it fucking made sense to me.

[00:13:28] The dream boat and he ship of dream like I don't know what these people mean. I don't know half of what Steve is talking about in the steel of the night.

[00:13:40] Okay, we just went along with it but the words didn't they weren't written for us. They were written for them.

[00:13:47] I did like Billy Joel one time where he said he's a very literal guy like I'm a literal comic like I tell things that actually happen and I actually witnessed or I was part of versus you can get the Maria Bamford.

[00:14:00] Comic who I love and wish I could be more like I'm just not like that where it's it's can be really out there and Billy Joel said yeah I'm just a literal guy like I write exactly what I've experienced he and he brought up like America that man that

[00:14:17] was saying I've been to the desert on the horse with me Billy was like what does that even mean I don't know what that means why would you write that he said so I'm like that's but our people my age we just did whatever we were told basically we were not defiant.

[00:14:33] The crowd was very nice. The crowd was so nice and so polite and everybody was in a good mood and between me and Bob we probably got up and disturbed our row. Probably six times well over four hours I drank a giant pink lemonade seltzer.

[00:14:48] I had to go to the bathroom. I got the dink. Yeah, no you didn't have to leave that's what's great about having somebody who's kind of into it I'll go stand in the merch line I'll go. I'm interested in all of it.

[00:15:02] But they were so nice because sometimes the concerts when you go excuse me sorry sorry sorry sorry people get you know like I love to do wrong.

[00:15:11] I try to be polite and wait till the song breaks like and then not but yeah the kid the children very polite. I'm just telling you their self-esteem is jacked up. It is so jacked up.

[00:15:24] Yeah, I'm very hopeful and I gotta say well I'll say it all in a day anyway moving on Dolly Parton. Dolly Parton and Queen News. You're welcome paddles. Yes, yes it was. It was yeah unforgettable. I'll work for free forever.

[00:15:43] I'll try to save up and see if I can get your ticket in Tokyo. I'm up Paris. Yeah anyway Dolly Queen News. Queen Dolly has surpassed over 200 million free books given to Joda. Yay they crossed it 200 million.

[00:15:59] Thing and she also does not want to be a hologram when she's dead. No she wants to be remembered for the music. She did an independent she did an interview with the quote independent I'm not really sure what that is. She played in Carrie. No.

[00:16:23] I believe that she was there but she was not at the party where 1100 people in the town of 5000 dressed up like her. And Shania Russell that doesn't sound like an Irish name to me. Yeah. 77 year old says she has no interest in being a hologram.

[00:16:43] I think I left a great body of work behind I have to decide how much of that high tech stuff I want to be involved with just because I don't want my soul here on this earth. Oh deep deep I never thought about that. Yeah.

[00:16:59] How about when she's still alive like Abba. No. No but think of the money you could make for all the nieces and nephews if you were to do a hologram but so far they have not perfected that the Whitney Houston one bit the dust in Vegas.

[00:17:13] Apparently it was terrible. I've never followed up on my own pubcast podcast and I should about did the Abba one sell did it work work. I don't know. Taylor Swift in London. Taylor Swift in London. The what? Abba.

[00:17:33] Yeah I'd rather go to the Abba thing for a night. I realized how many Taylor songs I don't know when you're there for four hours.

[00:17:43] But it was so funny to see the kids around me that I mean 20s they're the 20 some little kids some you know I kept looking around to see if there was a parental beer garden that I could sneak into like I did at Blink when I needed to.

[00:17:55] With my friend Scott. Speaking of London speaking of London well I'm really talking about Elton John he did his final show. I'm putting him in the queen group for this week.

[00:18:07] Yeah yeah you know I don't have a cut out for him and I think he would take that as a compliment. His final show it was in Stockholm Sweden which I thought was a weird place to end.

[00:18:18] I would have ended in London then all your friends are there but maybe even one maybe even one all that. I don't know.

[00:18:27] What a journey in a tour this isn't it now we find ourselves at the end of it it's so sad because he's still so good but I do get it. I mean I feel like that half the time now and I'm 20 years younger than this guy.

[00:18:40] He said this is last time he will still do shows but he's not doing these giant tours traveling around the world.

[00:18:46] I think the husband has said FYI I don't know if you remember we adopted these or however that we somehow had two children and they're here and you're not.

[00:19:00] And they had children and changed our lives in 2015 we sat down with their school schedule and we said I'm going to miss too much of this. He has two sons with David Furnish they look to be I don't know like 10 and 12 or something like that.

[00:19:16] There was a picture of him somewhere they're very cute. His tour featured more he did more than 300 shows more than 6 million fans around the world. And he headlined the Glassenbury Festival as his final UK.

[00:19:29] Well I guess if you do the Glassenbury Music Festival that should be your last UK stop but then I would have went to London. I don't know who organized this.

[00:19:38] But he gave this speech I saw him in Nashville and it was one of the greatest shows I've ever seen in my life. It was a man and I really didn't think it would be I just went because I'm like oh well he's quitting. I've never seen him.

[00:19:49] I should go once. Well I mean now that I knew what it was I wish I would have bought seats on the floor because no no I didn't stand nobody sat down anyway I would have stood up the whole time even though I'm short.

[00:19:58] I could have got an aisle for the shorties. I think they should reserve aisle seats for people under 5 foot 2. That's a good idea. Wouldn't that be nice? Yeah. That's it I don't have any other Queen news. Stevie's out there.

[00:20:15] I might try to go see Stevie on my birthday. My birthday weekend I took off. So it's either Stevie or golf. Stevie might quit. She says she's never quitting. She wants to die on stage mid song.

[00:20:30] So she's never no she said that so she's never quitting share I feel like there's rumblings rumblings and I have secrets in Vegas. And usually my rumbling my little rumbling termites are right. Usually she's amazing yeah all right update.

[00:20:56] This one you're going to be so for every moment of joy you had in Denver paddles you're gonna have to suffer now. Yep update Elizabeth Holmes. No! You know people talk about white privilege. She's in prison and I still have to hear about her.

[00:21:17] She's in prison and you're gonna still have to hear about her like Martha Stewart's prison journey. We had to hear a lot about that. But I enjoyed it all. And I enjoyed as my mom I'll never forget my mom going oh she's a nair duel. Exactly.

[00:21:31] I go whoa she bombed my mom put it on Twitter. I'm tired of hearing about this nair duel. No I kind of called my mom I couldn't Google it.

[00:21:40] It means someone who thinks they're of importance but has the definition was brutal like has no significance or relevance to anything known to man. Yeah clearly my mom does not like Martha. Well because Martha was a beauty queen everything was handed to Martha.

[00:21:59] She is Snoop Dogg's best friend now but Martha didn't Martha grew up with a lot of privilege but anyone people say what white privilege. That definitely is probably that is the thing I get it but really it's rich people privilege. Let's just they're just this Elizabeth Holmes thing.

[00:22:18] This is about money it's I mean this is she got two years already shaved off her 11 year prison sentence. And they're like well this is they're going to do all they won't talk about it.

[00:22:30] They can't talk about why but one I'll read it one of them's good behavior. How do we know you're well behaved you've been here less than an hour. Oh look at how look at her sitting in herself not bothering anybody cut a year off crying.

[00:22:44] She has apparently been behaved well enough during the first six weeks of her more than two for to be eligible for release to nearly two years ahead of schedule.

[00:22:55] So if we do that every six weeks you should be out by Christmas seriously take two off for every six weeks. I don't know she'll be out by May.

[00:23:06] No it's bullshit somebody called a favor called a favor look at all the people in the documentary that she ended up. She did that she took donations from or believed in her fancy pants now they may mad at her because she jacked them out all that money.

[00:23:22] But there's probably a few that are sympathetic that went well I didn't really care about my 200 grand so whatever I'll make a call on. Yeah the US Bureau of Bureau of they project that she'll be released from she's 39 years old.

[00:23:36] She'll be released on December 29th 2032 that would be 115 months or slightly more than nine and a half years after she began her prison sentence of 11 years and three months. Now here's the bullshit line.

[00:23:49] She can qualify for early release under federal government's good time guidelines her projected release date a few weeks before 49th birthday is in line with a prisoner serving her length of sentence bullshit.

[00:24:01] You know many people are sitting in there for drugs and crap that they don't ever get their prison.

[00:24:07] This is a call this is a phone call for she had her mom and daddy call after she cried all day that they did they came to visit and he went I'll do what I can honey or somebody did it.

[00:24:18] Yeah they won't say the specific reasons because they're citing privacy safety and security. Right every inmate earns good conduct time is in and is projected in their projected release date. What? Yeah so that's what happens when you got all this money. Yep friends in high places.

[00:24:43] I mean she knew everybody the Clintons everybody George Schultz and then the grants on a him anyway you guys have to go in all that if you want to but you should which speaking of I'm going to forgive you.

[00:24:55] I'm going to get this because I don't write it down what we're watching what I did sneak in.

[00:25:04] So the serial killer Gilgo Beach guy architect guy there's a thing on Netflix called lost girls and Gabriel burn plays the head of police but it is the exact story of what happened and how the cops mess the whole thing up or really really at the end of the day didn't give it.

[00:25:25] They're not going to give it because they're prostitutes so people don't care they're not you know well there was a toddler involved but I think it was a child of one of the prostitutes so then what he cared about that.

[00:25:35] That's why and they're white I think most of them were white he's white the serial killer guy but you know prostitutes nobody gives a shit but anyway it's an hour and a half documentary and when it was finished they still hadn't caught at all.

[00:25:55] The go go zero killer so at the end of it it says this is unsolved this is weird yeah ten years there was a gap where nobody did shit.

[00:26:05] Some new da came in and said this is ridiculous I'm reopening this and then new people came in but then I was reading about.

[00:26:13] Yeah I think this spurted you look like you look like lazy fools who didn't give a shit but then when you read about the real cop that was the head of everything.

[00:26:25] Played by Gabriel burn who was awesome and is still so handsome I mean he's old but he's still so handsome man.

[00:26:32] That guy ended up in a federal prison for having sex with hookers while he was working but not just that he did way worse things to end up in the federal prison but he was just a piece of shit and then he left and nobody went hey man why don't we try to nobody care.

[00:26:51] Nobody cared that's about a month. Alright Bob day this is one of our traders. No paddles we are doing the work of the Lord here and we have a responsibility as American citizens to report where you're half Canadian.

[00:27:16] You Justin Trudeau would agree with me people need to hear the end of the story. Yeah I care. We have a constitutional responsibility. Civic duty more appropriate neighborhood watch.

[00:27:34] After courtroom outbursts Florida music teacher sentenced to six years in prison for her January six felonies you should see her too. Yeah she ain't young. No she doesn't look like a teacher she has on a very flowery dress.

[00:27:57] I don't know what I would peg her as if I saw her I would not she looks a little rough and tumble for like no cards. Yeah I don't know the flowery dress is confusing.

[00:28:10] Florida music instructor on least an unexpected verbal tirade at prosecutors and the media and the federal government at her court hearing has been sentenced to six years.

[00:28:22] She's 54 her name is Audrey Sothered Rumsey she's a one person wrecking crew and added a terrorism and added a quote terrorism enhancement to her sentence.

[00:28:36] She was accused of being an agitator who was in the front of the mob as it swelled towards the speaker's lobby as member of Congress were hiding inside.

[00:28:44] She also is accused of screaming vulgar and vulgar threats about Nancy Pelosi was charged with pushing police at one point using a flagpole to push one officer.

[00:28:53] She was found guilty on seven charges but wait it gets better during a dramatic 15 minute statement inter sentences hearing she pushed aside papers that included a set of pre prepared remarks so she threw a speech out.

[00:29:06] She instead blistered prosecutors calling them liars and then accused of Capitol Police whom she'd allegedly confronting of being terrified. Well I would have been terrified if I'd seen this lady running at me with a flagpole I'd be like holy shit.

[00:29:20] Grandma is fired up and I'm getting out of here. Turning periodically to the face of the prosecutors in court room audience who were seated behind her she told the judge I wanted to tell you exactly what you wanted to hear but I won't lie. These are vicious lies.

[00:29:35] They have her on camera. What? People you forget it's 2000. Well at the time yeah 23 everybody's got a phone everybody's got a camera.

[00:29:45] She accused oh she accused Antifa Antifa of filming her amid the Capitol riots said my whole dream of my life has been taken because people have different politics in mind. No. No. I think it would be funny if somebody in the courtroom just went mmm okay.

[00:30:04] Every time she says help. I have grievances but they won't listen to us at the polling place. They don't listen to us little people in the regular world.

[00:30:13] I'm ashamed of this country when you decide to throw me in prison for doing my duty think of what I now have to give up. You shouldn't have done this. There's cameras. She criticized gas gas and grocery prices. She just turned into my mother halfway through the speech.

[00:30:31] I would have been like whoa is Vicki Madding in here. Do you have any idea how many how much chicken is right now Kathleen. No mom I don't but you're going to tell me and I know it. She said she's terrified about what's happening in this country.

[00:30:46] She said she's terrified about what's happening in this country. Her defense attorney approached the podium to urge her to wrap up her remarks. She did not she kept going when she referred returned to receive the federal prosecute urged the jury to not allow a customary federal court leniency

[00:31:03] sentencing for acceptance of responsibility because she did not. Huh. Mmmhmm. The judge criticized her and other January 6th defendants for cloaking themselves in patriotism. Oh. He cited some language vulgar language attributed to her including profane and threatening language she had directed at former house.

[00:31:24] She said Nancy she said tell Pelosi we're coming for that bitch. Oh. Not a lot of people are on the team Pelosi just as a side note.

[00:31:33] No I can't say I'm in love with Nancy Pelosi either but I'm not going to go to her job and take her hostage wherever your office is. I'm tired of looking at Nancy I'm tired of looking at Mitch McConnell I'm tired of the whole turtles.

[00:31:50] But I talk about that my real act. She said I won't protest because I'll be in prison why protest you guys don't listen. Oh my God. Oh my God. She declined request departing the courthouse but she turned to reporters and said you're all fucking liars.

[00:32:09] You should be ashamed of yourself. Well Audrey is going to have a lot of time to think about all this. As a matter of fact six whole years maybe like Elizabeth Holmes it'll get cut down to four for good behavior in a month.

[00:32:22] I love that she's got his formal name Audrey. What? Update. Update. Update. This is crazy. And I listened to it. It's super cool.

[00:32:41] The BBC claims to reveal the voice of the elusive street artist in a new podcast series after unearthing an interview he gave to a U.S. radio station nearly 18 years ago. Yeah they think they know who it is. They think it's this guy Robert Googing.

[00:32:55] I'll read it when I get to it. Gunningham, Googingham something like that. But I listened to it and the man in it sounds, I don't know enough about local accents in England. But he sounds like he's from the same street as Adele.

[00:33:14] Because he does the, I thought it wasn't coming. I think. Yeah whatever that is. But anyway, this interview, the snippet is taken from all things considered news show on national public radio in 2005. Just days after the street artist had hung up his work inside the Met.

[00:33:38] He walked into the Met and hung up a painting. Oh my God. Yeah well he's going to tell you how he did it. The rare interview started for the first time in the UK on BBC Sounds. So there's a 10 episode podcast if you guys want it. Oh cool.

[00:33:54] A series on Radio 4, it's called The Banksy Story. We'll put it in the schnotes. I think we should be able to get that somewhere right. On the internet. Can I go on the worldwide internet?

[00:34:08] The resurfaced chat follows decades long attempt to reveal the graffiti maestro's identity which should, which has been shrouded in mystery since he first emerged in the late 1990s.

[00:34:18] They've identified him as Robert Gunningham, a former public school boy who grew up in the suburbs of Bristol but this has never been confirmed by the artist or his inner circle. Nor would I ever do that if I was him. Right now you have the perfect life.

[00:34:33] He can walk into any pub and have a beer, nobody knows who you are. Because I thought that about Teh Teh. That whole thing is so insane. Once you're noticed, you can't, and then people always go, but you're a millionaire. Yeah, I get it.

[00:34:51] You can have all the money in the world, but once you're a prisoner, you're liable to go crazy. So I'm kind of proud of Teh Teh for not going crazy. So this guy right now, normal life. Keep it.

[00:35:01] And so in the interview, they say, we assume that you are who you are because you say you are, but how can we be sure? Banksy, well we'll just call it Banksy. He said, oh they call it a Bristolian twang. Oh. Yeah, oh. Where is that at?

[00:35:22] Giggle it, petals. Where is Bristol? Bristol. And he said, oh you have no guarantee of that at all meaning you may not even be talking to Banksy. Nobody ever asked me how to prove on me when I do a podcast. Bristol. It's in England. Thornberry.

[00:35:45] How far from London? I don't know where Thornberry is. I've only been to London. I've never gone out in the country. Stand by. You have to go through Slough and Swindon. Slough and Swindon? I have to go through those to get to Bristol. To the 15 minutes.

[00:36:05] North, south, east or west? Do west. West. Heading towards Wales? Just heading west. Don't try to sound like you know it. Well I know Wales is south west. Is it by Scotland? No, Scotland is north because I've been to Scotland and I know two comedians from Wales.

[00:36:31] And one night we got drunk and they explained to me how the whole thing works. It's south of Gloucester. London. Anyway, alright now we know. That's where we think he's from. In the NPR chat, the alleged banks, he said he sees himself as a painter and decorator

[00:36:47] and claims he likes to glue his work to the walls of institutions such as the Louvre in Paris because you don't want to get stuck in the same line of work your whole life long do you?

[00:36:56] The host asked him how he gets institutions and hangs his work without permission. This is kind of true with a lot of shit people don't know this. He said he replies he's been reading books about Harry O'Deaney. Like I won't get into details, he said.

[00:37:13] But he's got some good tips for artists. I think it's a testament to the frame of mind most people are in when they're in a museum. Most people don't really notice things and let the world go by.

[00:37:25] For instance in the Met they hung a Henry Matisse painting upside down for 42 days I believe it was until someone told them it was the wrong way. All right. I was aiming for at least 42 days but I didn't get that far.

[00:37:37] Asked if he works alone or if he has without permission or does he have any help? I do. He does work alone. He said I don't want to bring other people into that. He added I thought some of them are quite good.

[00:37:52] That's why I thought put them in a gallery otherwise they just sit at home and no one would see them. If you wait for people to latch on to what you're doing you'll be waiting forever.

[00:37:58] You might as well cut the middle man and just go put it in the museum yourself. Yeah. Well I've painted things maybe I'll try to just take one down to the Frist Museum in Nashville or maybe the St. Louis Art Museum.

[00:38:10] When he is told what he's doing illegal he replies that's what makes it good fun. And in his early years he was anonymous due to fear of being prosecuted for street art. Now he paints covertly to protect the air of mystery and stay out of the spotlight.

[00:38:25] His work which usually makes strong political statements has appeared all over the world and sold for millions at auctions. The new exhibition we talked about on here in Glasgow last month. It was his first one of 14 years.

[00:38:37] So yeah he just snuck in but there's something to be said. You guys can go listen to the rest of the podcast. There's something to be said for if you do something with confidence there's a good chance no one will stop you. Right. Like.

[00:38:59] Well I don't want to encourage it. No. But there's people backstage that there's so many people. I'm not encouraging it. I'm just saying there's so many people backstage that I don't question anyone. Well security might but I mean I'm wandering around back there too.

[00:39:21] I'm just looking at shit on the walls. It's not like I'm I don't know my friend Scott Kennedy a comedian who passed away. He was the king of any we never did anything bad.

[00:39:30] And even when we were rule breaking I was very nervous but Scott said it's all about confidence. So we got this gig one time in West Virginia we called is called like snowshoe West Virginia something.

[00:39:43] It was the world's only quote upside down ski resort meaning all the condos were at the top of the mountain. So once you got up the mountain you just stayed up there and skied. I thought it was a great idea. Yeah.

[00:39:54] But Scott was lazy and kind of a little chubby and he didn't like to. He always wanted to park close so he goes watch this and he had made these badges up these laminated he goes put this on.

[00:40:08] I'm like I'm not putting that on you're doing something bad and we're going to get in trouble and I don't want to go to a West Virginia jail. Stop it Scott stop it. He goes we're not going to get in trouble in a Texas accent.

[00:40:19] He rocks up to the booth and he said I forget what the owner's name was called Danny Guggenheim. No like he had a name or something I made up Guggenheim but Danny Cunningham Scott rocks up and goes hey how you all doing? You having a good day?

[00:40:40] He goes my dad's going to be so excited to see you guys out here working your asses off. I'm Stephen I'm his son I'm just going to go in there and they were like oh hello Stephen hello.

[00:40:46] And I was sitting there like I'm part of some highway Robbie. I said who's Stephen? He said his son all you got to do is Google it and I said well how do you know that they don't know Stephen?

[00:40:59] He goes how many people Kathleen in a giant thing like this have ever actually met the owner's son. So he just took on the identity and we pulled right up to the spot he wanted to park in and I didn't I'd never so skied.

[00:41:12] I have no clothes for this I have no money. I'm making maybe probably 400 bucks that week and Scott's like well you have to learn how to ski. I said I don't have any clothes for all that and I can't afford all that he said that's no problem.

[00:41:26] So he marched me in to the lost and found and just put an outfit on me but like helmets and gloves like that and it's all other people stuff and I'm like Scott this is someone stuff.

[00:41:37] And I'm going to be skiing quote skiing more like falling down a mountain with someone's stuff on me. He goes well then they'll be happy because they'll go those of my gloves and if they're not smart enough to come to lost and found that's on them Kathleen.

[00:41:51] And I said well only if they agree to let me put it all back I don't like being involved in your crime Scott I'm a rule follower.

[00:41:57] I don't it was all innocent but there's just Banksy's right like if you do it with an air of confidence and don't get nervous. Most people don't question stuff. Yeah anyway moving on. Holy shit they found it. Holy shit they found it.

[00:42:22] A dragon that everyone thought was extinct has been found again in the wild. What. A dragon. He's a tiny dragon. I won't want it to pet. What. How long is 15 centimeters? No. This long? Like 7 inches? Less? Giggle it. How many inches is 17 centimeters? You should know this.

[00:42:52] You know metrics. 10. 10. Decimeters I don't care about that. About 7 inches. 7 inches long. Would you like to have a 7 inch dragon? Yes. They were once widespread. In fire. I don't know yet. In the native grasslands west of Melbourne Australia but over the years they were understood to become extinct.

[00:43:20] Thanks to habitat loss and predators like foxes and feral cats. Chop oh. One of my cats today ate a skink and if you don't know what a skink is it looks like a slimy lizard. I've never heard of him.

[00:43:33] He ate the, I, well he ate it and then he came up on the porch licking his lips and then he drank like 8 gallons of water. So I guess they're salty. Feral cats eat these things.

[00:43:44] Anyway however environment minister Ingrid Stitt announced the surviving populations of the species has been found. This is an amazing discovery and offers an opportunity for us to recover a species once lost to our state and the world.

[00:43:59] With the help of our partners we will continue to fight the extinction of this critically endangered species ensuring future generations can see them and learn about this incredibly unique lizard. I'm not sure why they said dragon. I'll take it. Because it kind of looks like a dragon.

[00:44:17] It does. The location of the rediscovered population is being kept secret to protect the habitat and the species. That is a good idea. Yeah, you can't tell the general public where these things are at.

[00:44:32] Like they put bobcats on Keowa Island and then they had a live feed because they had monitors on them or whatever tags or whatever. And they had to, they didn't, they did it live. Well then the hunter people came out to kill a bobcat.

[00:44:49] So they had to delay the feed. They should have thought of that before they did it, but whatever they did it. This is kind of fun if you're a regular old construction worker in Rome.

[00:45:01] They discovered and first of all, if the dirt moved and I saw this, I would be like, ah, body, ah, body, ah, dead person.

[00:45:11] Because it looks so much like a real head that I think of at least a few people by pissing their pants when the mud rolled over.

[00:45:20] Yeah, uh, tradies they call them, I guess that's construction workers have the splendid and intact marble head during the works in the historic center of Rome. The city's mayor Roberto, somebody shared details of the incredible fine. Roma continues to return the precious evidence of its past.

[00:45:41] A splendid intact marble head was found during the works in the Piazza Augusto Imperatore, supervised by a son-to-he wrote, referring, um, this thing is in perfect shape.

[00:45:52] They said that the newly found head of the elegant workmanship is likely to belong to a female divinity, perhaps, ah, they don't know which one. Then they named it like that.

[00:46:04] It shows a refined hairstyle of hair gathered back thanks to a tiana, a ribbon knotted at the top of the head, he said in this statement.

[00:46:11] The head carved in Greek marble was found intact in the foundation of a late, ah, wall on the eastern side of the Piazza that's currently being worked on. Reused as building material, it lay face down protected by a clay bank on which the foundation of the wall rests.

[00:46:28] He said the reuse of the sculpture works was a very common practice in the Middle Ages, which allowed in this case, a successful preservation of a work of art. What a fun day that would be if you're out there sweating your ass off in Rome.

[00:46:39] Well, it's fun till you realize it's not an actual human head. It's just a marble thing. It's a marble thing. Good. News. News! Glad you got your voice back. It's me. I'm back. She wears shorts, and I wear... I'm still not present. She...

[00:47:18] Here's some Americans I don't understand. America, what is wrong with you? Death Valley threatens temperature records, but the tourists keep coming. They almost shouldn't tell them what the temperature is going to be. Well, I would have to put up a giant sign. That's weird.

[00:47:44] No, the giant sign that says, if you're dumbass, gets lost or runs out of water, no help is coming. Exactly. And then right there I'd have a nice table of water and some beers, even though you shouldn't drink alcohol and that kind of heat.

[00:48:01] And I'd have a conversation with them about why they should go home. Let's think this through. Come on, children. Temperature and the famously sizzling Death Valley. It's already called Death Valley. It's as advertised. Things die out here. Things that live here die out here.

[00:48:20] Things that lizards, snakes, things that can handle this still die out here. Temperatures of the famous sizzling Death Valley are now predicted to equal or even break modern records this weekend. This is happening as I speak. I'm addicted to the weather channel lately.

[00:48:35] There's so much going on with the Canadian fires, the smoke. The sky in Nashville is all messed up. New York looked ridiculous yesterday. No, the sunsets although sometimes they get that fire looking on there kind of even career there.

[00:48:48] Anyway, the U.S. Southwest is currently trapped under an unrelenting heat wave with the extreme temperatures forecast to climb even higher in the coming days. In the National Park, the thermometer could climb past 130 Death Valley. But that won't deter some willing to brave the heat.

[00:49:05] Okay, that's one way to write that sentence. Willing to brave the heat. No. Opting, opting to die is what I would say. That won't deter some opting to die. I corrected that from this article from The Guardian. Okay.

[00:49:28] Daniel So-and-So snapped a photo earlier this week of a famed thermometer outside the aptly named Furnace Creek Visitor Center after challenging himself to a run in this watering heat. Hmm? Tomorrow.

[00:49:43] Yeah, most visitors make it only a short distance to any site in the park which builds itself as the lowest, hottest, driest place on earth. I don't know. Somewhere in Iraq, it was 151 at the airport. Somewhere in the Persian Gulf. Yeah, I saw it yesterday.

[00:50:01] I don't think they can take off. Plains can't take off. Well, Ron used to tell me that about... I'm not sure Ron would know. He knew because Ron had tater air. He had his own airplane. Tater air. Ron White's tater air. Is it a planter now?

[00:50:18] It's probably a planter. There's probably just pot. There's probably just filled with pot growing out of every... It was a tiny little thing. I went in it a couple times and each time I thought, this is a terrible mistake. Kathleen, don't do this. But I did it. Anyway.

[00:50:34] Signs at hiking trails advise against venturing out after 10 a.m., though the nighttime temperatures are still expected to be over 90. Well, that's the other thing, especially for Midwest people or East Coast people that don't.

[00:50:49] One of the times I went to Palm Springs with Lewis, we rocked up to this golf course at 5 o'clock in the evening. It was hot, very 102. But if you're not from there, you get out and you're like, well, it's not that bad.

[00:51:03] Because it doesn't feel like the Midwest humidity. There's no humidity. But I also said, yeah, but Lewis, there's no other golfers here. Maybe there's a reason. And he's like, well, no, it's 5 o'clock. It'll get cooler. And I thought that too. I thought, oh, well, he's right.

[00:51:18] Well, like eight holes in, I have a... The guy kept handing me cooled down towels. Dude, I'm good. I don't need... What do you think is going to happen? Well, I know what he thought was... I found out.

[00:51:33] It doesn't necessarily get cooler till like midnight versus if you said on a summer night in the south or the Midwest or the east. Yeah, no, it doesn't work. The desert doesn't work that way sometimes. The hottest temperature ever recorded at Death Valley was 134 in 1913.

[00:51:53] So we have been as hot before. 1913, yeah. So there's no global warming. Right, well, right. There's no global warming except everything's on fire and nobody can go to Europe because it's too hot. And you can't go to the Southwest because it's too hot.

[00:52:10] And you can come to Missouri. Everything's fine. It's fine. News! I have to think of a different way to say that for that sake. Okay, full disclosure. My friend Andrew Dorfman and his children. They're all in their 20s now. And my friend Brian would do this too.

[00:52:30] Little Dorf. They have gone python hunting in the Everglades. What? Yeah. Stop it. Oh no, they are not afraid of snakes. They like it. They love it. They love it. You like it. You love it. You love it.

[00:52:46] One time Andrew jumped off my dock because he saw a snake, like an animal. He jumped off the dock to try to catch it. I mean... Yeah. Your friends are weird. I do have very weird friends. But everybody brings something positive to my life. Thank you.

[00:53:05] So this reminded me of them. This would have been the greatest day of their life. Andrew and his kids. A record-breaking Burmese python as long as a giraffe is caught in Florida. And it's two youngsters. Well, the one guy's young. Nah, they're both pretty young. Wow.

[00:53:23] Stephen Gatta and Jake Wallery brought a 19-foot-long python to the conservation department of Southwest Florida in Naples. They have it measured and studied. You get paid, they have hunts where you get... So anyway, quickly... Do you get to make boots? I don't know if you...

[00:53:44] I don't know what they do with it. Maybe the article was there. I didn't read the whole thing yet. I'm not that I like that. You want a snake skin boot? I'm terrified. I'm terrified. It's the longest everyone recorded these two.

[00:54:01] But see, back like 20 years ago, people started dumping their little pet pythons that just turned into giant pythons. And then they really realized, oh shit, I have to find a rabbit every week for this thing to eat.

[00:54:13] Like it gets pricey, it gets insane, the snake gets too big, they panic, they throw it in the Everglades. Well, the population goes bananas. Or they flush it down the toilet. Or they flush it down the toilet and then it ends up in somebody else's house.

[00:54:26] Scaring the shit out of somebody, but they have like 100 eggs per birth. So the Everglades is now taken over by these pythons. And it doesn't have a natural predator except maybe an alligator. But they will eat the pumas. I mean even the cougars won't... The pythons!

[00:54:43] Will eat a cougar? Absolutely. They constrict it and then kill it. Well, the babies, I don't know about an adult one. But anyway, it's a problem. It's disturbing the whole ecosystem. According to what everyone says, obviously this is not my area of expertise.

[00:54:59] Anyway, it was caught last Monday. I want to know how they got in their car. It was 125 pounds. A video of his record... 125 pounds? Well it's 19 foot long, it's as big as a giraffe. I know, I saw it on Instagram.

[00:55:16] A record breaking catch on Instagram shows the python lunging at Wallery as he pulls the snake onto the road by its tail. First of all, people forget to... Yes, they're constrictors and know they are not poisonous,

[00:55:28] but they can bite you and the amount of bacteria I'm sure in their bite is enough to send you to the hospital for sure. They wrestled on the ground. Him, this man in the snake wrestled on the ground until others joined to help

[00:55:41] peel the snake off the hunter. The previous record was 18 feet 9 inches, weight 104. The biggest one ever... Well the fattest one ever was 215 but it wasn't the longest. Burmese pythons feast on Florida wild, big and small from rabbits to house pets to foxes to white-tailed deer.

[00:56:07] Oh my god, one Instagram clip from 2022 shows Florida scientists removing a 5 foot long alligator from an 18 foot python The state hosts an annual competition, the Florida python challenge in efforts to keep the population at bay. The competition attracts professional hunters and amateurs alike

[00:56:26] competing for prize money ranging from $1,000 to $10,000. That's ridiculous. It's an invasive species running rampant through much of southern Florida that wreak havoc on the state's native animal populations because pythons have no natural predators in Florida, which is why Wallery spends his nights hunting these monstrous predators.

[00:56:43] It's awesome to be able to make an impact on South Florida's environment. We love this ecosystem and we're trying to preserve it as much as possible. Good for him. It's just... well good for him, but you know, 7 million more to go.

[00:57:01] Maybe we could think of a different way than having him and his buddy go hand-catch them. It's 2023. Do we have any ideas from scientists? Smart people? Any ideas? Smart people? Smart people? News! We really gotta work on that. I gotta work on that.

[00:57:24] I know you've lost your voice. News! No, my voice is good. Well now it is. Richard Simmons has spoken. What? Now! For you younger termites, Richard Simmons was this exercise guru and he was always on shows and lettermen, but then he just kind of disappeared.

[00:57:45] And there's a whole podcast about it. And I listened to it on some road gig in between stuff. Because I was like, well, there's rumors that he's been being held hostage by his housekeeper. My thought was, I bet he just got chubby and was like,

[00:58:03] I am not dealing with that anymore. Right? Up down he was a chubby kid, then he got skinny and then it was all let's run around in a leotard, a onesie and jump and sweat into the oldies and all that.

[00:58:13] Or, or maybe he's just getting old and went, I don't want to play anymore. Right! Let me just stay home with my dogs and, well, he's been very quiet leading to, but Richard Simmons made an extremely public, an extremely rare public statement on Thursday

[00:58:31] to celebrate his 75th birthday. 25? Yeah. Although he didn't share a personal message with the public in his fans, he did allow his representatives to speak on his behalf. This is a big milestone. I just want to see him happy, which he is,

[00:58:49] at his Rep Tom Estee about the special occasion. It's a rare form of communication from the form of fitness guru who's largely hidden from the public since 2014. Wow! So we're going on 10 years. I remember that. He was previously spotted in 2017 when he checked himself

[00:59:08] out of a hospital for being treated for severe indigestion. I think he had a knee issue too. But all old people do. He did a lot of sweat to the oldies. Mm-hmm. He tried to avoid being seen by nearly covering himself, had to deal with a blanket,

[00:59:25] which then required his housekeeper to lead him to a waiting car. See, that's too much. Now you've taken the costume too far. Just wear a ball cap. Put your hair on a ponytail. Put it up if it's still long. It's doable. Put on a suit and tie.

[00:59:41] Nobody would think that's you. Despite Simmons' recent reclusive years, fans showed that he was still in their hearts and minds when they dropped by his home on Thursday. Well, you don't need to be doing that. To wish him a happy fifth birthday in person.

[00:59:52] Although they likely did not see him, two people were spotted carrying balloons with a sign, Happy Birthday, Richard. We love you. His abandonment from this wildlife shock many friends and admirers at the time, and even generated an investigative podcast. Yes, that's what I was going to do.

[01:00:08] Documentaries at Half Bay claims that his housekeeper was holding him hostage. He's done a few interviews. He spends time at home in his yard. I think he had great Danes. He had some... Google what kind of dogs... What are those names? Burnies, Mountain Dogs.

[01:00:26] Google what kind of dogs does... They're big. Yeah. Then it just goes through his resume. Yeah, so at least his representative stays. He has three Dalmatians. Three Dalmatians. Oh, well how cute is that? I'd want to stay home too. People are still wondering about his sexual orientation.

[01:00:46] They're still wondering about his sexual orientation. Okay, well that's on you people then. Sad news. Yeah. Sad. The oldest craft brewery in the United States shutting down after 127 years. What? Ah! Why? COVID got him. And it's one of my favorite beers. Until I left the state of Missouri,

[01:01:12] because Missouri is mostly Anne Hasaboch products, well especially St. Louis. We didn't really go off campus drinking with our beers. And then when I started a comedy and I'd go to other cities and other towns, like I got to Denver and I had my fat tire.

[01:01:29] And then you go to Philly and you have, you know, everybody's got their thing. But this was one I had on the road. I think my friend Tony introduced me to it. Anchor Steam. Oh my God, really? Yep. Oh! Pour out one for anchor brewing.

[01:01:45] America's oldest craft brewery shutting down after 127 years in business. The San Francisco based company announced Wednesday it's ceasing operations and liquidating the beloved business following a combination of challenging economic factors and declining sales since 2016. Craft brewers in particular have been struggling for a variety of reasons.

[01:02:03] Well, how about also because there's now 9 billion craft breweries? I mean every, they're like, if you go, which I do, go into a local liquor store in whatever town you're in. That's why I always just choose or termites bring them.

[01:02:20] And then I just taste one on the podcast. I'm completely out of hand. So, yeah. Another problem has been Sephora, the Japanese beer company that bought the brand. Seporo. Seporo, that's what I said wrong. Yeah, I like Seporo though. But anyway, they bought it in 2017.

[01:02:42] Their alleged mismanagement and lack of understanding of craft beer in the United States contributed to the downfall. It's a sad decision. 61 people were given the legally mandated 60 day notice. That sucks. That sucks. Yeah. Seporo had made repeated efforts over the last year to sell the business.

[01:03:04] I'm surprised nobody would want to buy that. Anchor got it started in 1896 in San Francisco. It was the first ever craft brewing. Fritz Maytag, yes, just what you're thinking. The Maytag Corporation bought it in 1965 when it was on the verge of bankruptcy. 65! And helped usher

[01:03:26] in the craft beer industry in the United States. Most notably, brew was steam beer. A pale ale. Never had it. Never heard of it. No. I know Anchor steam. So, that's a little just... So if you like Anchor steam or any other product,

[01:03:44] what else do I see here? Go get it. Before they stop, I mean go to your grocery store. Buy a case of it. Maybe a termite can find some of the West Coast. Termites can find some. I'm sure of it. Share our last name. Yeah. It totally...

[01:04:06] This made me laugh my ass off. Well, I'm going to save that one for next week. Flying Car! News, news, news! This should be an update. Flying Car Company granted FAA certificate aims for 2025 release. Wow. California based aeronautics

[01:04:25] says it's working on a car that will be street legal with the vertical takeoff and landing capabilities. That's pretty cool. We're excited to receive this certification from the FAA, CEO Jim So-and-So said. It allows us to move closer to bringing people to an environmentally friendly

[01:04:41] and faster commute, saving individuals and companies hours each week. This is one small step for planes, one giant step for cars. That's right. It'll have a flight range of 110 miles. That's funny. It's being designed to fit within the existing urban infrastructure for driving and parking.

[01:04:59] And it has flight stabilization systems and safety features such as enclosed propellers and a full vehicle ballistic parachute. Oh my God. Can you imagine just... The two occupant car has been on pre-order since the fall and they hope to start delivering the cars by late 2025. They're only $300,000.

[01:05:21] Now for what you're getting, that's not very much. Because there's a brand new Denali all souped out is 100. Right. Yeah. Pre-order deposits ranging from 150 to 1500. Maybe I'll go put a deposit and then I'll get a loan and then I'll make one of the children

[01:05:43] come over and drive it. I wouldn't get in one of these for at least five years. Maybe ten. Because I don't know. The company said it is received... I don't know what the speed limit is and like... I mean can you...

[01:05:59] Can I just fly around downtown St. Louis? No! Or am I going to get in trouble? It doesn't seem like it's... I don't really see how it's been worked out yet. Let's put it that way. Um... This is crazy. Yeah, you know, I'm always...

[01:06:17] I am very interested in art news. I don't even know why. I don't even own anything that's valuable. I just... I think because it's such a bizarre... Well, I like to paint but I'm not like really an artist. Yes you are. No, I mean like...

[01:06:33] Do you want a picture? I painted a beagle sitting at a bar. You want that? Nobody wants that. I want that. I think it's wonderful. This is going to be the most expensive painting ever auctioned in Europe. And I'm embarrassed to say

[01:06:49] I never even heard of Gustav Klimt. Klimt? Klimt. K-L-I-M-T. Yeah... This painting was on his easel when he died in 1918 and it is beautiful. It's a lady and there's flowers but it's like a lady with a fan. It's called the lady with a fan.

[01:07:11] The lady with the fan, but the colors... It could be the most expensive painting auction in Europe. Oh wow! But what makes it a masterpiece? An Australian symbolist painter, Gustav Klimt is best known for immortalizing opulence of such milestones of modern art at his gold leaf encrusted canvases.

[01:07:31] The kiss... We don't need to know about all this. But this one, this is what was sitting on his easel when he died from pneumonia as a result of the flu in February 1918. A month after suffering a devastating stroke that left him partially paralyzed

[01:07:49] and I don't mean to paint. It's expected to fetch the highest auction price ever for a painting when it's sold next week. So I just read about this last week um... Radically different texture and tone from his better known pieces. It's expected to get $83 million. $83 million?

[01:08:09] I would think it would get more! Why? There's so many billionaire people. Yeah, yeah. I mean it'll sell for $200 million five years from now. There's only one. He's dead. He ain't painting no more. Then the... Sometimes these art articles though then they go into five bazillion dollars.

[01:08:35] Five paragraph thing about the painting that normal people are like whatever. Um... It's one of the very few portraits by him by Klimt, a leading figure of Vienna, succession art movement to be owned privately. It was last sold in 1994 when it fetched $11 million. So it's going up $70 million.

[01:08:57] Wow. Probably. 30 years later it's expected to come in nearly seven times like that becoming the most expensive portraits to ever come to auction. It will soar past Rene Magritte's L'Empire de Lumière which sold for $75 million in two... I took French in high school I can manage that

[01:09:21] in 2022. Um... I'll let you termines. No. What it goes for. I would think some... Bazillionaire would just march in and go what do they want? If you have 83 you have 100 million. Just do it. That's something I would pay to hang in the house.

[01:09:41] Like I would want that in my house versus buying the world's tiniest purse that you can't even see this, you know, that kind of shit. You got a Taylor Swift poster. I'm gonna have to make a special trip to Michael's to frame

[01:09:54] the poster. No, I'm not doing that. Oh, you're gonna do it for me? Okay. You do it for me. Stamps are going up. News. Alert. All of my old people friends. They're gonna be so mad. I will defend the post office till the day I die.

[01:10:10] The cost of postage stamps is going up by three cents on Sunday. That's the third price hike in the last 12 months. Why it matters. It's a 73. It changed since 2000. The shortest time between stamps increases the postal history. The post office said in April that the increases,

[01:10:29] if you've never heard my joke about the post office, go online. Wherever you get your music, we'll put it on the shelves. And I still stand by that joke. The postal said in April that it increases raised first class mail by approximately 5%.

[01:10:43] I always wondered the people that won't buy the first class mail. It's like three cents difference. I mean, nah, fuck it. I ain't doing it. Not doing it. Yep. I'm as lowly as possible. They need it to address continued elevated inflation prions for prior years defecting pricey modeling.

[01:11:04] Boring, boring, boring. Sunday, July 9th. This goes into effect. It's gonna be 63 cents versus 60. Postcards. Three more cents. Postcards are sent domestically are 51. My friend Jim McDonald, shout out. Comedian sends me a postcard every week. Jim, I just got more expensive. International postcards are $1.50. But you know what?

[01:11:31] I have a friend. Yes, I have a friend who has a special needs adult sister. And I said, well, would she like to get mail? Because they used to send all my nieces and nephews postcards and they don't care anymore. They don't care about where Ankit is

[01:11:45] or what Ankit does or they just don't give a shit. Which is totally normal and part of growing up. But I thought, well, then I made this promise to do it. Gladly. Nobody sells postcards anymore. No airport. You have to go to weird gas stations. It's strange.

[01:12:05] I guess I never noticed when they phased them out. I guess nobody wants to send them because now we send each other pictures and whatever. Snapchat. Snapchat. Are you on tech talk? Yeah, I'm on tech talk. I don't know why.

[01:12:19] I think I need to turn off the notification for Snapchat, but I don't really do it. But I get these notifications at the top of my phone. Mary V is on Snapchat right? I don't give a shit. I got to go in and fix that.

[01:12:31] All right, I'm going to tell you. Yeah. Posting on threads. Yeah. I don't know guys. Are we doing that? Are we moving over to Zuckerberg? I mean, the devil you know, the devil you don't. Well, do I stay with Elon? Who's worse? Let's vote.

[01:12:55] Elon seems a little less stable. Elon seems less stable, but Mark Zuckerberg doesn't seem real. He's like an avatar of a human. Yeah. I don't know. Just reporting back. Well, Jeremiah's feedback. Are we going to threads? Or are we stopping? Is social media declining?

[01:13:21] I'm not going to get off Instagram. The children don't go to Facebook anymore. No, I put things on Facebook for people over 40. Honestly. Oh, oh, panel says 50 over 50. No, because people like my sister, all their kids sports and all that stuff

[01:13:37] are tied up in Facebook, so they still go on Facebook. They have to. Otherwise you're going to miss your softball practice. Well, I'm not going to get off Instagram. I'm not going to get off Instagram. I'm not going to miss your softball practice. Top two.

[01:13:53] 15-foot python escapes in California. It's still loose. Another python? Oh, my God! It's in Chatsworth, California, and I know exactly where that's at because it's where my first manager, who I loved more than anything, Bernie, he's still alive. He's just not my manager anymore because he quit.

[01:14:13] They go do other things that were more fun. We'll really use my second manager. Leslie Rosio-Donald got her show and then he went to New York to do all that. And I said, if you're doing that all day and all night, you don't have time for my,

[01:14:25] what about me, headlin' in the old funny bum Bernie? Anyway, he lived in Chatsworth. It's a suburb of Los Angeles. It's kind of far suburb, but it is a suburb nonetheless. The reticulated python, fittingly named Big Mama, escaped from its cage in the family's backyard.

[01:14:45] Oh, it was in the family's backyard in a cage. The owner, Alex, put on Facebook, she's friendly to humans. What? At about eight inches thick. He added a warning to residents, because she was just fed, but please be aware, she has the potential to eat cats,

[01:15:11] medium and small dogs. Hence, she is a constrictor. She's light in color. I feel so bad, something simple. He left the cage unlocked. Oh my God! Now, despite his assurances in Facebook that neighbors shouldn't fear the python, he told the news outlet that the reptile,

[01:15:28] which is not venomous, could potentially cause harm. Is she dangerous to humans? Yeah, she's a constrictor, right? She does like to coil and compress. Oh my God! That's called killing me. They're often a thousand dollars reward to anybody who helps locate it. We're pretty anxious because some people

[01:15:49] are not very fond of reptiles, and we're pretty scared that somebody might harm it. We're just fearful for our lives, actually. For the lives of our pets and our families. Something might happen. Yeah, I'm not going to put my two-year-old out in the backyard. No way!

[01:16:03] We're just crazy. We're wondering how this could have happened in the first place. Wherever she's at, she's probably trying to preserve her energy and is holed up somewhere comfortable. That's what he's decided. That's ridiculous. If you're in Chatsworth, I'd find out where Alex lives.

[01:16:21] I'd go on your local Facebook page, and then I would think super hard about it, my dog or cat. Outside. Alright. This is our last story. This is a crazy one. It's a good one to end on. Waitress wins $10 million. $10 million lottery and all hell breaks loose.

[01:16:43] This is such a great... I like the way whoever... Who wrote this? Sean Kernan. It's great. It all began in a dying Alabama town. The Grand Bay Waffle House was filled with hungry customers. It's always got to start with the waffle house.

[01:16:59] Everything good and bad starts at a waffle house. All good and bad stories. All good and bad stories. And in rural or especially the south, all stories start at a waffle house. Most were working class. Many were retired. The sound of the smell of frying bacon

[01:17:15] drifted out of the busy kitchen. Tonda, that's her name, was in her late 20s. She's a divorced single mother who left her abusive husband a few years prior. She now lived hand-in-mouth, working five shifts a week. By the way, I read somebody did a thing

[01:17:29] about working at a waffle house and they just don't make enough to put up with what they put up with. So if you go in a waffle house and anybody is there cooking or waiting tables, be nice to them.

[01:17:39] They make them even pay for their own anti-slip shoes. They don't even give you a uniform budget. I don't know this lady did it. She went and got hired on purpose to write the story. Yeah. Seward finishes meal in Tip Tonda with a lottery ticket a customer

[01:17:59] that he bought in Florida during one of his routes and so began a snowball of events that would make a great movie script. Unlike most lottery winners, she chose to take 30 annual payments of $375,000 rather than a lump payment of $4 million. She was young enough to enjoy the payments

[01:18:17] and knew this would help prevent her from blowing all the money too soon. She quit her job at the waffle house for the time being. Then things began to unravel. This is a great story for a bedtime story if you're a child over the age of five.

[01:18:29] First, four fellow waitresses sued Tonda saying they had a joint agreement to split any lottery winnings from tickets customers gave them. No. I don't believe that. At court, the waitresses brought in a customer who said she'd heard Tonda mention the agreement to her.

[01:18:49] Tonda contested the customer wasn't real. It was a friend they brought to help win the case. Mmm. So far, um, so far I'm just ruling for Tonda. The courts ruled against Tonda saying she must split the earnings. Well, I wouldn't have done that.

[01:19:07] You have no proof other than a bullshit witness that anybody ever said that. Now, she could have been kind of giving him some money but to split it equally? No. That guy gave that to her as a tip. Unless the rule at Waffle House

[01:19:19] is you pool your tips. But I don't know if... I don't think it doesn't seem to be the rule. I was thought when I waited tables I was thought pooling tips was bullshit. Totally bullshit. Some of us work faster and harder and some do not. No.

[01:19:37] Then an Alabama district court overturned the ruling saying the agreement was built on gambling which is illegal in their district. Oh, now we're getting technical. One would think this was a moment of relief for Tonda but it was only the beginning of her problems.

[01:19:49] Her Waffle House customer Ed's Edward Seward learned Tonda won the lottery and called the lawyer to sue for his share of the money. He claimed Tonda had said I'll buy you a new truck if I win with this ticket. Nobody did that. You've known that. Nobody did.

[01:20:07] Or you do it as a joke. You go whatever you want, I'll buy if we win a million dollars. There's a pesky thing called, promise sorry, estoppel E-S-T-O-P-P-E-L I've never seen that word. Or you can be held accountable for an oral promise

[01:20:27] if the court sees it as reasonable. Seward's problem, if you tip someone with a lottery ticket it is statistically low value tip. And the rare chance that they'll win, you can't reasonably expect a partial return. Right. His case was quickly rejected. Then things got worse. And then

[01:20:45] Tonda's abusive husband learned she won the lottery. He shows up and kidnaps her. What? She's going on in Alabama. Albella hold my beer. Says Florida. It's not funny nobody should be kidnapped but this has gotten so crazy. He shows up and kidnaps her keeping her at the wheel

[01:21:09] and forcing her to drive. He says he's going to kill her. They begin to drive to a remote region in the boonies of Alabama. 20 minutes into the drive he took a phone call and he was distracted. Tanya pulled out a gun and threatened to shoot him.

[01:21:21] He lunged at her to take the gun. Before he could grab it she pulled the trigger sending a bullet into his chest. He managed to take the gun from her. At her urging they went to the hospital to get him treatment. He managed to survive but was

[01:21:35] sentenced to a brief stint in prison. Tonda's story, though dramatic has many parallels to other lottery winners. People consistently turn up out of the woodwork trying to get a piece of the money. Many many families have been torn apart because of a jackpot. The lottery turns

[01:21:51] people into parasites. Here's the other thing. Your odds of winning are pretty slim. So he's just a shitty tipper. Here's, right? Here's, yeah, a shitty tip. It's a total shitty tip. Here's a $2 scratch off. Oh come on. Here's some other lottery winners stories. This is great.

[01:22:11] One man invested $3 million in a meth ring and lost all of his money. Well maybe you shouldn't invest in meth. In a meth ring? Michael So-and-So I won't say this last name. He spent $112 million on prostitutes, drugs, and a destruction derby track in his backyard. Good for him.

[01:22:35] People are crazy. Another man from Pennsylvania he won $16.2 in 1988 and then his girlfriend sued him and his brother hired a hitman to kill him. He eventually died broke. The conclusion to Tonda's story. Fortunately, Tonda had more luck with her long-term story than most. She settled a lawsuit

[01:22:56] with the IRS over her winnings and whether she owed a gift tax because the ticket was given to her. The IRS investigated 100% of big lottery winnings so plan on hearing from them if you strike it rich. She also did what most lotteries did.

[01:23:08] She kept winners should do. She kept working. I read up on Does Is the Lottery winners for the article. The helpiest and happiest ones were the ones who stayed busy and kept working. Early retirement is a fast track to going broke. Tanya is now dealing

[01:23:20] cards at a casino and gets her annual lottery check. Unfortunately, she wasn't killed by her ex-husband and then let the windfall cash to win. She had to go to prison for that for a while. I'm sure he's out. Unfortunately, she wasn't killed by her ex-husband

[01:23:38] and doesn't let the windfall of cash ruin her relationships. Shout out to Waffle House workers. Thank God you guys are there because I'm not good with a griddle. I'm good with a frying pan but not with a griddle. So we're going to have a separate little podcast.

[01:23:56] Tiny, tiny, tiny podcast if you want to hear all about Tate the details. If you don't you didn't have to sit through it. Where am I going? Well first of all, new summer t-shirts will be available next week. Yup and new trucker hats

[01:24:12] within the next few weeks so keep going on the website. I'll put it out there when it's already. It's just not done yet. Here's where I'm going. Hampton Beach Casino Wallroom Cape Cod Melody 10 Yeah, I have friends and my nephews are coming with their friends. Boise, Idaho

[01:24:34] Reno, Nevada Hershey, PA Pittsburgh Cleveland, Eau Claire Wisconsin, Madison, Wisconsin Chicago Theater That's called a marquee venue. Some of my venues are not marquee. With Aaron Weber Richman, Virginia Charlotte, North Carolina Warner, DC That's very exciting. And then we're going to get Oh it hasn't been announced yet

[01:25:06] I didn't say when so therefore I didn't announce it so nobody can yell at me I'm saying that shit but when tickets are on sale I think it's all in my The Warner's been announced that tickets are on sale Yes it has, it's almost sold out

[01:25:23] We just got a balcony to fill Yes the whole bottom and the whole next thing is sold out But the whole thing There's no bed seat in that house for real, I say that and I mean it Yeah it's on sale October 21st See I know what's happening

[01:25:45] Alright Terabytes I hope you're having a fun summer There's a storm rolling through here What's up about? Love a summer storm And I'm fortunate enough to have a nice porch to watch But when it should hit the fan you can't say up And that's it Alright