Episode 125: Chinese Mystery Balloons, New Health Benefits of Beer, & Retiring The Prince of Darkness

[00:00:08] Hey everybody, it's me Kathleen Madigan. Welcome to Madigan's Pubcast. You grab yourself a drink, pull up a bar stool Let's talk about what's been going on Turbites Episode 125 What an over-stimulating week. Oh my god if you're a sports fan right now I'm drinking a

[00:00:35] Bloody Mary made but well it's my waist management glass which is the golf tournament in Phoenix It was on TV all weekend. I bet a Sweet hundred dollars on Rory and he just shit the bed

[00:00:47] No, the Canadians did well on Nick Taylor Adam Hadwin, Scotty Scheffler one that guy's rock solid though Like on the 16th. Oh, he had like a 10-foot putt for Par no problem because the other guy Nick could have caught up by another stick

[00:01:02] He would have been even Steven but then Nick missed it so boom Anyway, I know a lot of people what you're gonna talk about live golf a little bit later, but the vodka in Scotty likes Jesus and waffle house with him on both

[00:01:14] But I also like beer and wings and bars in addition to what is original. I'm with them I did see all the Canadians and they wore those Monty outfits, which was great in the morning But then it got hot hot and they didn't they didn't went out

[00:01:29] They kept them on the whole time because they had there were like four Canadians out there running around doing great Thanks to live golf. There's some hope No Doesn't Adam Hadwood's been in there the whole time Nick Taylor kind of younger newer I

[00:01:46] Forget the other two that were creeping around Cory counters Yeah This is my friend Dax the drummer from cheap trick. This is his family's vodka. It's called rockin Rockin, and I love the emblem. It's a skull with two guitars

[00:02:04] It's very fancy and it's smooth looking for an elegant vodka that will elevate your cocktail experience Rockins creators with their extensive tenure and entertainment that that I have discovered a versatile gluten-free Rockin vodka. You can give some to my sister 100% distill from sugar cane

[00:02:22] Yeah, it's delicious. So I'm drinking that and a bush light From where the state of Missouri? winners of the I don't want to get too far into it cuz sports can be polarizing to say the least and I have a lot of friends and

[00:02:43] Co-workers and fans and family that are Philly people. It was a tough day for them Was a great game. Let's say you didn't have a dog in the fight It was a it was a great Super Bowl compared to many

[00:02:54] I won a side by square in the family square thing She pays a hundred the for the final one hundred eighty five dollars my entry was only a hundred boom eighty five out of profit

[00:03:05] Lewis won a whole square outright six hundred bucks. I know he's never won before I can't even call him yet Hope he too overstimulated. I have to give it like at least 24 Yeah, that's uh That's all I'll say about Super Bowl, but congratulations everybody

[00:03:23] Was really what and then and the track and the Kelsey boys Yeah mom Yeah, you gotta sit next to Roger Gidell the whole time like why am I your trapped keep where you my keeper?

[00:03:36] If I was that lady at the mom of those boys, I'd be like get me away from this cheese whiz How far how do I got to do to get a good seat? That's not with you How do I do that?

[00:03:46] I'll just go sit with anybody cuz she doesn't care it could be Eagles fans or Kansas City fans She's got a kid on each team fine put me anywhere. Just get me away from I can't stand What are we tasting before we get to everything?

[00:04:02] Well, we have Sniders one of my favorite pretzels has now gone a little off-road with a jalapeno ranch Today I might go to Kentucky fried chicken and get that they have the um

[00:04:15] We got a chicken pot pie. It's new chicken pot pies by my favorite thing in the whole world Yeah No, I don't like these Word to gallery regular pretzels are great Well, I love Sniders of Hannover, Pennsylvania. I love the real pretzels, but jalapeno ranch

[00:04:41] No, that's a solid no this is for the sweet tooth people twix is now making cookie dough flavor. I Like twix. I don't know. Let's see No No Too sweet. I mean you just took it over the top my mom get for my mom. Oh my god

[00:05:08] God, I'm gonna need a drink of beer after that Last thing we're trying Chick-fil-a avocado lime ranch dressing Now full disclosure, I think there's cilantro in here

[00:05:24] Which is gonna make me want to vomit but I'm gonna do it anyway in case you're thinking if you're at a chick-fil-a And I know people don't like Chick-fil-a for various reasons

[00:05:38] No, do limey do cilantro you just more vodka. Yeah, I raised all that I raised all that Oh and then my friend Clark Clarks from Portland, Oregon and he said he just missed me so he sent me a little bit of love from Oregon

[00:05:58] This is so this is not a joke This is I'm serious. It's a Sasquatch field guide. It's a big foot field guy identified tracking and citing North America's relic hominoid Mm-hmm, and it's got how you identify it's got footprints It's got distinguishing features

[00:06:19] His ears are hidden on the side of his head flat face broad shoulders long limbs high crotch Yeah, my mom wouldn't know how to buy him jeans. That's all she would ever yell at my brothers out loud in Sears

[00:06:30] How do they fit the crotch? Oh my god? Stop mom stop um a Bear is five to six feet Sasquatch seven to ten bear can weigh anywhere from 150 700 Sasquatch 600 to a thousand colors bears black brown cinnamon white and

[00:06:50] I guess the Sasquatch doesn't does not come in cinnamon black brown What but then it's got all this stuff about how to cast a track like I'm not that scientific I can't do that other people need to be doing that Footprints and then all this is not they're

[00:07:08] Not kidding. I can't wait to read the whole thing. It's what they eat Anyway, and then he said he sent me the clerk. I'm just gonna say for straight out these are going to my mom because

[00:07:23] No, I'll taste one but my mom its marshmallows in chocolate. It's bigfoot a hundred percent Pacific Northwest Sasquatch poop Yeah, get it. Yeah But adorable It's from Coos Bay, Oregon Yeah

[00:07:40] Oregon is extremely strange, but they like it like that they like to be weird and good for them stay weird Isn't that their slogan keep Portland weird or something something like that? I? Think it's Portland too. Oh Hmm. I

[00:07:55] Think Portland had it first. I don't know. I'll look it up Now more importantly than the Super Bowl Um We have to have a brief discussion about the UFOs And if they attack before my special is released on Amazon I'm gonna personally fight back. I

[00:08:22] Have a week. Yeah, I have a gun. I'm armed The special is released on February 21st the trailer is out Um But seriously all kidding aside I'm not getting though if they ruin if that happens the day if they ruin my special

[00:08:38] I'm gonna have a super super wave of anger because Lewis says Lewis the first Chinese balloon he texted me. He's like Well, it's your thing is finally coming true. I'm like my what he's like the aliens

[00:08:52] I'm like I hadn't even thought about that. I'm thinking it's drone wars It's the one time. I'm the most practical person that I know Everybody else is like they're coming aliens were screwed Why would aliens be sending unmanned things?

[00:09:08] Here's the other thing Lewis said, well, how do you know that they're coming in bad faith Name a group of people that have entered other people's areas and were lovely

[00:09:22] Never the the pilgrims get over here. The Indians are like, hey, you want to have a meal and we killed them all I mean, let's put it this way Lewis. I told him if let's say I woke up in the middle of the night

[00:09:34] And there's a UFO with lights beaming down over the top of my house. I'm gonna be scared shitless I don't find that exciting. I don't I find it terrifying I don't have a basement as we know which I should because of tornadoes

[00:09:48] I might have to go buy one of those things you put in the ground. Maybe I'll do that because of the aliens but You were giving poor advice. I was giving

[00:09:54] I was giving some very poor advice by a hillbilly that I trusted drunk in a bar. That's on me. That's on me You really couldn't have more salt on this buddy. Mary than I've done I could just It does

[00:10:11] It's really what I like most about bloody Mary's the olive and the salt. Yeah anyway, um Now there's three that have been shot down Why isn't the Pentagon coming out and saying exactly what the hell these things are then there's all this shit on twitter

[00:10:26] There's a video of it going down a highway in montana the thing that they recovered What if this is a ufo? Why is it the size of a small car? I just pictured something like star trek where there's a

[00:10:35] Holodak and room for entertaining. Yeah, there's no are there and then go the loo goes. Well, how do you know there weren't aliens in it? I said I don't know that loo, but it's set on man. I can only go with what I read

[00:10:48] But it is weird that this week all of a sudden We're shooting shit out of the sky and they changed it from one of them from on super full sunday from lake michigan up to lake Huron it's crossing between canada

[00:11:00] And then loo goes well, we need one in south america to make it legitimate What? How can you put rules on aliens loo if you think they're aliens? May I think there was one in south america You get the mounties and they're americans

[00:11:14] The mounties that's oh my god the guy in missouri our governor. Why you already said that? He's like don't worry I've called the police How far do you think a cop gun shoots you jackass? Just he saw I can't I can't with him um

[00:11:28] Uh, so I don't know what do you guys think you think it's aliens? You think it's drones the other thing I threw out to my brother And to lewis what if it's elon?

[00:11:42] He should be arrested, but who's gonna arrest him the government's doing business with them. I mean And also my brother said no the government's done too much business With elon with tax credits and stuff

[00:11:53] They wouldn't give him that kind of technology. How do we know he doesn't have it? I think if it was elon he would have That he you think elon would have unveiled it well

[00:12:02] I remember in columbia missouri like a year ago two years ago. I remember in covid People saw this v of lights and there are videos all over twitter My brother's wife saw it Totally real well those were drones from texas But

[00:12:18] The midwest people all panicked and ran in their basements in their tornado shelters thinking it was two aliens that was elon I don't know what you guys think Speaking of the super bowl um My friend brian asked me this this morning. What's up with the jesus at? Dorf

[00:12:41] Dorf asked me. Yeah, I said dwarf Here's the thing. I'm gonna talk about it on the podcast. So you should listen Which even sure he does not Um It's basically the hobby lobby guy What? Yep. No. Yep. Now if you watch sports

[00:12:59] These things have been going on for a while during football especially during the playoffs I don't know about other sports because I don't watch other sports right now I'm just because football is the only thing on that I like well hockey but

[00:13:09] People thought that was kind of hats and hockey No, or golf. No Um This is what's going on with that In between star centered advertisers a whole lot of football but but the he gets us campaign to promote jesus and christianity christianity now

[00:13:26] Here's a weird thing a couple that i've seen Seem to imply That immigrants That are coming over should be taken care of because it's part of mankind. That's the message I got but the Which is because then they compare it to jesus and mary and not having anywhere

[00:13:48] To have that jesus was an illegal immigrant or whatever an immigrant or whatever and then they show People getting rounded up in the back of a truck. It seems very pro Save the immigrants which I think if it's the hobby lobby guy, I don't associate

[00:14:06] The super christian right with that And there's a lot of people saying that's a trick These ads are trickery This is a great thing about being this is this is the great thing about being catholic to me

[00:14:18] That's all just outside of us like i'm like i don't know what you're all doing but you sort yourselves out What kind of christian you are

[00:14:26] I mean i i already got a thing i'm sticking with it in it to win it already put all my money in the catholics lot machine I'm not moving machines now Um, this is the thing and it's associated to the core group is somewhere in missouri

[00:14:40] No, I know it's always my state with the weird I know I know We're very strange. Um The heat too too many of this possible be nothing new He gets us content has been peppering tv screens billboards and social media feeds since the national launch in 2022

[00:15:00] The campaign is arresting profane portraying a pivotal figure of christianity as an immigrant a refugee Right a radical an activist for women's rights. Okay, guess who's not an activist the lobby lobby guy

[00:15:12] He won't even he won't include birth control in any of the health plans and all that Um, which by the way All right, all right, but I think you should be part of the church. Um Do Whatever you are facing jesus face to the campaign complaints

[00:15:32] It's getting noticed one of the campaign videos titled the rebel and that at a hundred twenty two million views on youtube in 11 months It's a natural fit with the nfl whose games have long contained symbols of religion

[00:15:44] Players often pray pray on the field and point to the heavens after a touchdown But after certain details it's got alarm bells going off those the two groups, um Of they're trying to get young people and those skeptical of religion

[00:16:03] It's like remember that Scientology one where they're like don't you want to get to know yourself better or some crap? We're like you're just trying to get curious people to call that number

[00:16:15] Some of the some of the campaign's major donors in its holding companies have ties to a conservative political arm Political aims and far-right ideologies that appear at odds with the campaign's inclusive message This is why it's trickery to be careful

[00:16:29] The chain of influence behind he gets us can be followed through public records and information on the campaign's own website Most of it's anonymous though The hobby lobby guy so far is the only guy that's fessed up and said fine. I gave a shit ton of money

[00:16:42] It's probably my fault for all those years buying wrapping paper there It's good wrapping paper It is but I stopped once he was mean to the workers knowing covid

[00:16:52] Because he made them come in or fire them or some horse shit. I don't remember that I just went you know what dude People don't have to agree or disagree, but you shouldn't fire them over especially look who's working at hobby lobby mostly older women

[00:17:06] I'm always mused at the one by my house because somebody really hates them and they go in and take all the letters and Rearrange everything and they say mean things about trump. They rearrange the letters that they sell like the initial

[00:17:17] I go in there sometimes just to see what they've spelled out It's not me. I didn't do it. I would never do it. Um The hobby lobby co-founder david green claims to be a big contributor to the campaign

[00:17:32] Hobby lobby has been at the center of several legal controversies including the support of anti lbg2q legislation Also, uh, allowing companies to deny medical coverage for contraception on the basis of religious beliefs

[00:17:45] Also, how about you stole all the antiquities and had to return them all you bought them and you knew they were stolen And then we had a comment go give us a shit back Don't be a liar

[00:17:54] And he did it but only not until they got caught. I don't know if it was this david greed, but it was the somebody in charge of hobby lobby um

[00:18:03] We want to say we being a lot of difference that he gets us green said jesus understands us. He loves who we hate He loves who we hate Why are you hating anybody? I think we have to let the public know and create a movement

[00:18:19] It does not list list donors on its website Funding for he gets us comes from a diverse group of individuals and entities with a common goal of sharing jesus's authentic story Okay Don't most people know jesus's story Right. I mean

[00:18:39] That's why they send people into third world nations where people don't have cable yet They're like, can you go tell them about jesus? I may not have heard If you're watching the super bowl Come on Um

[00:18:53] Be assured we are not left or right or a political organization of any kind We're also not affiliated with any particular church or denomination well you I think you are Right if the hobby lobby guy's in Um, if he's one of the biggest donors um

[00:19:13] Let me keep going The information does not appear to be Oh Meanwhile we generate. Oh wow. He gets us has chosen not to separate Uh statements to not have our own separate statements of belief

[00:19:26] Each participating church in ministry. So the churches are given in will typically have its own language. Meanwhile, we generally recognize the lucene covenant What is that? As a reflect reflective of the spirit and the intent of this movement and churches

[00:19:41] The partners with explorers from he gets us affirm the lucene covenant The information does not appear to be listed anywhere on the main. He gets us here it is In 1974 lucene covenant is an important unifying document in evangelical christian churches

[00:19:56] While the lucene movement I may not be saying that right la usa and ne It was started by the prominent evangelical christian leader billy graham. I mean come on Documents and decisions that have come out of the movement summits have decried the idolatry of disorderly

[00:20:16] Disordered sexuality and focused heavy on the impact of the devil and sins on national cultures Some people say the campaign is not authentic a lot of times when you look people look at christian a and unfortunately they see What they see is much more hypocritical judgmental and discriminatory

[00:20:36] We are trying to unify people around confounding love and forgiveness of jesus well Some of the he gets us messages make oblique references to cancel cancel culture Which raises a red flag for some who seem to term as highly political and a staple of conservative rhetoric

[00:20:56] One message uses a slogan jesus was cancelled If you're saying jesus was killed that's one thing Yes Yes, if you're christian you believe that but canceled if he was canceled we wouldn't be talking about him 2000 years later What a dumbass thing to say He was canceled

[00:21:18] No, you know who's canceled the other two guys on the cross that nobody knows what their names were I only know one because of the grade school st. Dismas right And that was the claim to fame of st. Dismas

[00:21:31] The grade school right we got the other guy on the cross Like i don't even know who got the other guy. There's some other catholic grade school that we're number two We're number two Other christians have criticized the um Wait when it comes to crucifixion and cancel culture

[00:21:49] I don't see much to compare rights joseph somebody a christian for christian publication Far the more imagining jesus is a political Is itself a political decision correct? You don't know He could have been super far right or super far left According to what he's saying i'd say left

[00:22:06] If you look at what he says um They think a lot of the super christians think the ads are too vague I think it's a trick because um Conservative pundit charlie kerr took aim at the campaign saying those involved have been taken

[00:22:26] For a ride by these woke tricksters. No, they're trying to get the kids that agree with that and then you trick them They're the ones tricking people charlie So by the way here's how much they cost um Um 30 second spots during the game we're running for seven million

[00:22:47] Yet they invest plan on investing a billion dollars and spreading their message So, you know what? We'll see if it actually leads people to jesus and if it does what path will they ultimately be encouraged to take Beware kids. Where are the children beware?

[00:23:04] Yeah, most people my age have already chosen a um What we're going with Sometimes i've said to my mom. Do you ever think what if what if the catholics aren't right? She goes oh

[00:23:17] I can't think that now catholium 75. I mean i put all my money in this slot machine Exactly now update I don't have any queen news. I got nothing Well super bowl you have aliens there's a lot going on this week

[00:23:32] There's a lot and a lot of crazy shit. Um I'm Bed bath and beyond what's one of the reasons you termites listen to this podcast because nobody else is going in depth on bed bath the beyond It announces 87 more closures

[00:23:51] Yep 87 additional stores the announcement comes after a beleaguered home good jane said it had defaulted on its lungs It's those cotton towels Oh So many towels not enough wet bodies

[00:24:08] No, the company also plans to close five by baby stores as well of all of its harmony beauty locations They said the closures are being done to increase efficiency as the company works with advisors to consider multiple paths as the retailers rise to turn the business around

[00:24:24] This store this store fleet reduction expands the company's ongoing closure program of approximately 150 lower Producing bed bath and beyond banner stores. We will update all stakeholders then listen to this This is the follow-up article to that You know it'll be interesting if they could get a liquor license

[00:24:45] If bed bath and beyond could get a liquor license And you turned it into a bar Within it. There's so much space Right, then you know people have a few beers wine or whatever and they're like, you know

[00:24:59] Maybe I will go get that new toaster. It's just sitting right there Then you could have you could have workers come by the bar and just show people stuff. Have you seen this new vacuum?

[00:25:09] You you gotta be creative when you're this far in the hole, especially if you're gonna go for it No no returns store credit store credit store credit Yeah, this was uh Last week bed bath and beyonds

[00:25:31] Uh stock sank as much as 45 percent on Tuesday morning. It was halted for a uh a day after the embattled retailer announced plans They're going to try to raise one billion dollars through an equity offering

[00:25:45] They had gained 92% during the previous session ahead of the announcement on Monday at a recent rally in near bank The nearly bankrupt company gained momentum Shares of the retailer heavily shorted with short interest. I don't understand all that shorting stocks I'll have to ask my brother

[00:26:00] So they're gonna try to raise um a billion dollars by closing stores and They're not thinking creatively Wouldn't it be fun if you were gonna go like hey, let's go have happy hour at bed bath and beyond I think I might want some new kitchen stuff

[00:26:20] But i'm not sure But if i'm sitting at the bar it's it's like in vegas where they used to come around that lady would come on Cigarettes yo yo she always had a yo yo. I'm like who's the drunk that wants to light up yo yo? Yeah, they

[00:26:33] Well, I did I mean I bought bought them every time but I was the only person It was a little embarrassing. Um, but then yeah people come around the bar go I know you think your toaster is cool

[00:26:42] But have you seen this one and it's a newer to right like the stuff you sit in your house That's just old and you don't think about it being old I don't know Moving on update for my mom How vicki madigan can relax and sarah's daughter

[00:26:57] They told me by the way my dad goes Well, we've been invited to a super bowl party. I said who invited him he goes I can't remember but I know she has a corned beef I said mom do you remember?

[00:27:11] No, but he's right whoever it is is having corned beef and i'm like well good luck with that yeah Wholesale egg prices have collapsed why consumers may soon see relief. This is all for you mom Oh, thank god. I don't have to hear about this anymore

[00:27:27] Do you know how much eggs are no mom? But you got them on egg beater I'm gonna know because you're gonna tell me I have egg beaters because i'm on the road all the time And when it came on the box of egg beaters is so good. Yes

[00:27:38] Wholesale egg prices have cratered in recent weeks meeting consumers may seem soon see relief But the dynamics of egg pricing from the wholesale to the retail addition to other factors means it's not a sure thing in the short term

[00:27:51] My mom's not gonna want to hear that price has fell to 261 per dozen on monday a 52 percent decrease from the peak of 543 on december 19th 47 percent decrease from the beginning of 2023 Mm-hmm

[00:28:05] So there you go now there's a big article in the article because it's the flu outbreak and it gets very very complicated Um where they're talking about the u.s consumer price index and i'm gonna think this podcast wants to get into hard things like that

[00:28:19] I'm just telling you for now what You could call the other cathleen madigan who's very good with um money and Things about money math Yes, she's a very nice person. I'm sure she's twitter. She'll tweet you back. I promise update

[00:28:41] Oh, what have I little treated this isn't so much trouble Oh Rider who paraded confederate flag through the us capital on january 6 is sentenced now I think the guy with the confederate flag is about as famous as the shaman

[00:28:56] Out of the whole day those two and the guy in polosis with his feet on polosis desk They were like five standouts where they just did more than the normal person This is what kills me though, and i've often wondered this

[00:29:11] The man who marched around the us capital on january 6 21 waving a confederate battle flag that he also used to threaten A black police officer was sentenced to three years behind bars kevin sea freed 53 again 50s my group snapping

[00:29:27] A whole group of snapping turtles and when i say turtles i mean old people And they are snapping turtles literally they because you know why by 53 If you don't have it together by now, it's super duper last call That's why

[00:29:45] That's why i always want my pilot to be in their 50s Because they're successful and they want to retire you're not going to crash that plane if you want your retirement You've worked so hard to get all that money saved up anyway

[00:29:56] Kevin see freed 53 years old teared up before u.s. District judge trevor mcfadden in washington dc courtroom The judge told him that bringing the flag into one of our nation's most sacred halls was outrageous

[00:30:06] I never want to send i never wanted to send a message of hate see freed told the judge Uh the Delaware man You're from the north You were on the winning team What are you doing? You're not even southern Jesus god

[00:30:24] It kills me when i drive like i do gigs up in new hampshire in vermont you get in the back ass woods out there There's confederate flights you you you were on the winning team. What more do i need for you to be?

[00:30:37] Unless they're southerners that moved up there, but i have known a million southerners I've never known as one southerner in my life dead texan or a georgian or anybody to go i'm moving to new hampshire I mean

[00:30:49] I don't even think they would i can't really tell you totally where it's at. It's up there in that corner Even when i'm in it. I don't know where i'm at Right new england That's a big grouping out Yeah, it's a lot of new

[00:31:05] The Delaware man breached the capital with his son hunter see freed He was hunter hunter was sentenced in october to two years in prison Both have been found guilty last june of charges including obstruction and official of an official proceedings

[00:31:20] Photographs of the elder see freed with his flag shot many americans in the aftermath of the attack on congress The pros slavery symbol has never been openly flown in the capital in the nation's history No, because they attacked the nation whatever i'm not gonna get it. Um

[00:31:37] He's been sentenced this guy the dad who carried the flag three years in prison At one point he used the flag as a weapon against uh capital cop Eugene goodman who faced off off against a mob of donald trump supporters by himself and successfully

[00:31:51] Diverted them away. Oh, that's the guy who tricked him. Yeah, and he kept going follow me and he used himself as bait And they all chased him He testified in court that this guy tried to push him away by jabbing the flagpole towards him

[00:32:02] He was saying things like fuck you. I'm not leaving Where are the members at where are they counting votes? See free's lawyers stated in court documents that as a high school dropout who grew up in an abusive household

[00:32:16] See free was not aware of the hateful message of the fight God He was taught that the flag He was taught that the flag was a symbol of an idealized view of southern life and southern heritage You're in tell away. I thought it was pretty

[00:32:29] Well, you could say if you're in the back cast woods of south carolina that you thought all this well, at least you're in the south Lacking in education with tonight's grade and lacking even average intellectual camp

[00:32:41] Intellectual capacity. Mr. See free did not appreciate the complex and for many people history behind it down to go very flak They were not affiliated the FBI did not affiliate it with any that they're not affiliated with any other far-right groups

[00:32:56] Um, he noted that after the fallout from the capital attack his wife had left him So he's gonna go to prison for three years probably out in a year and a half

[00:33:11] That'll put him at age 55 and he will not have a wife and his son will be mad because his son had to go to jail too happy times Moving on news. This is crazy And I don't know why

[00:33:25] Every single nightly news cnn fox. I don't know why no one is interviewing this man Because it's all this is real How did a seismologist predict the turkey earthquake three days before it? He nailed it. I didn't know that. Yeah, and louis goes

[00:33:44] So I read this to lou and I go I would I go did you see the seismologists and predicted the turkey earthquake? He goes well, they've always had a lot of psychics. It said things and it didn't happen. I go psychics

[00:33:56] He goes did you say psychic? I said seismologists He goes, oh, well, you know because I I like psychics and I believe some of the stuff they say but with the earthquakes They don't seem I'm like shut up Lou. Shut up No A dutch researcher

[00:34:13] This is all on youtube and his and his videos are post they're dated when he did them right and he's explaining why He's explaining everything I don't get Why this guy isn't like

[00:34:26] Pulled to the why is he making his own goddamn youtube videos like this guy can help everybody A dutch researcher predicted that an earthquake would hit the region highlighting with an almost exact precision the epicenter of the quake That would strike soon

[00:34:39] A dutch expert published a tweet on his twitter account three days before the earthquake in turkey on monday Predicting a powerful earthquake that would happen imminently in turkey. He even attached an aerial photograph And marked the area where it would happen Yeah, he's a seismologist But you know

[00:34:55] It's just frank over in office b and nobody's really like hey frank's fun at lunch But yeah, well frank knows shit other frank is drawing conclusions So I used to do a joke in my act a hundred years ago the easiest job in the whole world be

[00:35:09] Seismologists because you don't have to predict anything all you do is confirm it every time there's an earthquake Like in california they would go we go live to uca ucla seismology center There'd just be two guys sitting there making 150 grand ago. Yeah, we had an earthquake Sure did

[00:35:26] Probably have some more finally not as big. I don't know. We'll be sitting right here making 150 g and uh, yeah, the machine said it was a 5.3. That's what our machines like But finally this guy frank hoger beats uh

[00:35:45] That's dutch seismologist frank hoger beats who works for the solar system geometry survey in the netherlands predicted the earthquake in turkey on february third He said he said sooner than later. There will be a 7.5 earthquake. He even predict the amount

[00:36:01] In this region and then he pinpoints it on a map on his twitter feed And he's got videos Yes, everybody needs to follow. He's at H.O.G.R.B.E Especially like if you're in california or missouri, there's a big fault line

[00:36:18] We'll put it in this notes. Yeah wow um The ssgs describes itself on twitter as a research institute for monitoring um Geometry between celestial bodies related to seismic seismic activity Yeah, I don't know After hogaart's predictions went viable. He reacted to the earthquake

[00:36:45] And said as I stated earlier sooner than later this would happen in this region similar to The years 115 And 526 he's going back that far These earthquakes were always preceded um by a critical planetary geometry as we had on 4 5 february

[00:37:07] Right, I don't know what that means but I trust frank Franks if i'm in charge of this institute, frank's immediately promoted Yeah And I'd give him five. I'd give him two months vacation. He probably wouldn't even take it

[00:37:20] After multiple after the shocks in the earthquake were felt throughout the larger region Hogan beats gave his explanation for the aftershocks The large earthquakes in central turkey have caused a significant change in the stress distribution Throughout the region with seismic activity down to palestine as a result

[00:37:36] Clearly the region is resettling It's crazy that Why do I have to find this crap? Buried and then lou thinks i'm talking about a psychic on my phone calls. Don't go right. Nobody cares Nobody cares All right, this is a stupidest story

[00:37:58] But when I saw it, I thought it was bugs and I almost vomited 700 pounds of acorns found stuffed by woodpeckers inside the walls of a california home 700 pounds I thought they were like beetles. I didn't realize it was acorns woodpeckers stuffed 700 pounds of Acorns inside a california home

[00:38:24] They're doomsday's peppers the woodpeckers are there's a woodpecker that lives over in the woods over here And I hear it all the time and he's so precise It actually sounds like a construction drill Yeah, and I kept thinking

[00:38:38] My friend avi does construction things around here sometimes. I thought I wonder if avi's drilling something No, it's a woodpecker Yeah A pair of california woodpeckers are surely Are surely crushed after a pest control technician on a routine call

[00:38:54] Recently found their massive trove of acorns cleverly stashed in the walls of a california home The sonoma county homeowners called on nick castrow owner of nix extreme pest control where they spotted Worms coming from a bedroom wall That's like amityville horror shit. Yeah, I'd leave

[00:39:16] Yeah, I'll be at the marriott courtyard somebody go over there. I can't I'll be at the courtyard They turned out to be mealworms feasting on an incredible horde of acorns believed to be amassed by a pair of Apley named acorn wood woodpeckers was really strange

[00:39:32] I'd never seen worms with acorns before the get past guy said but the weirdness was just beginning After making a small four inch square hole in the wall the acorns began spilling out that alone wouldn't be terribly unusual

[00:39:45] But they just kept coming out. It was pretty incredible to see the amount He estimates there were at least 700 pounds of acorns collected over the past two to five years Often woodpeckers store acorns

[00:39:56] On the outside of homes sometimes in rain gutters, but rarely do they put them inside in this case He discovered discovered the birds dropped their treasures through a hole in the chimney And entered the attic through a separate hole to feast on their stash

[00:40:10] As they dropped from the attic the tens of thousands of acorns gathered From several nearby oak trees filled the cavity of the walls This odd but unusual find

[00:40:21] Took things to a whole level for the past guy who's been doing it more than 20 years on a scale of one to 10 This is a 10. It's a one in a million chance to find this something this significant I expected to find a few handfuls, but nothing like this

[00:40:35] They spent three days extracting them eight big garbage bags that were so heavy we could barely pick them up The acorns were thrown away as they were covered in droppings and bits of fiberglass on the walls Chimneys weird things can happen if you have a chimney

[00:40:54] I don't have a real chimney. It's a gas fireplace. I sometimes I wish I had a real fireplace, but I also know weird things can happen Yeah, squirrel bats Moving on Oh, I skipped holy shit. They found it

[00:41:11] Sorry, sorry that's after updates. You know what my things got out of order. I got too distracted down there Lot going on this weekend. Um, this is crazy cool

[00:41:23] And where do you see the picture of it in the schnotz amateur detectorist finds stunning gold necklace linked to henry the eighth Boom It is and it's got um His initials and shit on it

[00:41:38] It was such it was a find of such magnitude as the amateur detectorist who discovered it Was it a loss for worlds and the expert who unraveled its mystery spent two years reaching researching it dependent

[00:41:49] Features the symbols of tutor king henry the eighth and his wife katharine of erica. They don't one of the ones he did not kill On a chain composed of 75 links attached by an enameled suspension link in the form of Of a hand the first

[00:42:10] of henry's six wives katharine married henry in 1509 So it's like this gold chain with this heart thing. I don't need to use their Explanation, but charlie clark is the guy who did it

[00:42:24] He on he unearthed it in 2019, but they're just telling people about it. They probably had to get to somewhere safe Wow Um, this I don't even know how much it will be worth and they're they'd handed it over to the british museum carried out scientific analysis to determine

[00:42:41] Whether it was indeed part of the pendant and it is indeed part of the pendant I mean, I wonder the object to just come out of the ground on almost nowhere We've got an opportunity to subject to study it

[00:42:51] People say it's like winning the lottery, but people win the lottery and don't find the crown jewels. Do they? Um, he wants to use the money for whatever it's worth to pay for his four-year-old son's education

[00:43:05] Why do you see the picture of it in schnotes? It's beautiful and it's in perfect condition. I mean, you know considering it's at all Oh, he's shit they found it Egypt archaeologists Uncover complete roman city What these romans they just never took a day off

[00:43:25] Jesus every day put on your sandals. We're walking somewhere else. Oh my god. They're in norway. They're in ireland there Egyptian archaeologists said tuesday they discovered an 18 1800 year old complete

[00:43:38] Residential city from the roman air in the heart of the city in the heart of the southern city of luxor Also a casino my friend care top has a permanent sure at Los Vegas Nevada Like I was lucky at it

[00:43:51] This city dating to the second and third centuries is the oldest and most important city found in the eastern bank of luxor according to Mustafa waziri head of egypt's archaeologists They also discovered a number of residential buildings as well as two pigeon towers a structure

[00:44:08] Used to how pigeons are doves and a number of metal workshops inside the workshops. They found collections of pots tools bronze and copper roman coins they found temples and tombs to two In 2021 they announced the discovery of a 3000 year old lost golden city on luxor's west bank

[00:44:28] When with the archaeological team calling it the largest agency city ever uncovered in egypt, I mean they just keep finding Wow When I went wood to roam when I took my mom and my sister went all that I said let's go to old Rome

[00:44:44] If you go there, it's like the fur, you know my sister's like It's just so much rocks I'm like i'm never going on vacation with you again that she tried to tell me that the coliseum never had gladiators

[00:44:56] I'm like I can't stay on this vacation. I'm leaving you you and mom Can do that and me and rose the neighbor are going over here Yeah, I'm not listening to this fake history Well, I heard from my friend Cam and sasa

[00:45:13] That that never even happened kefflyn. That was all made up They did do it in other cities. I'm like she had a whole story about it. I'm like, oh my god Um, okay now we're moving on to news I Know this is good news health good news

[00:45:38] As I take a drink of my beer drinking up to two cans Of beer or glasses of wine may lower your risk of suffering from dementia Yay

[00:45:53] Researchers in south korea analyze health data for more than four million people in the country who were tracked for up to eight years This was not a bullshit study. This is not just a weekend thing Eight years

[00:46:04] Those who had one can of beer one glass of wine had a 21 lower risk of dementia compared to non-drinkers While those who had two daily drinks had a 17 lower risk But anyone consuming how alcohol and higher amounts three or more had an eight percent higher risk Hmm

[00:46:28] But now you know If you believe the south koreans wine Then the rest of this article gets super hard It's very sciency. We don't need to read all that just know that the south koreans if you believe in them And they believe in you

[00:46:46] Two beers two glass of wine a day You're good to go Um what next let me see what next so many things Um the super yacht no Let's talk a little bit about live golf

[00:47:03] Now I know a lot of people don't care about sports. So I will make this short and painless, okay? Um, oh, yeah that one. Oh my god. Yes that one Oh the feel-good story this week is gonna blow your mind. It's mind blowing

[00:47:17] It is about a dog. No, it's not about a puppy but about a dog um So if you don't follow golf, I'll catch you up. So you feel like you're in the no There's the pga tour that is what we have had forever

[00:47:29] Jack Nicholas arnold pomer all these guys spent their careers trying to form a tour Blah blah blah Greg norman has always had been very angry at the pga tour for reasons I really truly don't understand. He's the australian guy called the shark

[00:47:43] He my sister had a poster of him on her wall. She was madly in love with greg norman I Was more of a raiment floyd person I like bretsky and you like wane bretsky who is not a pga golfer, but that's fine

[00:47:57] He does golf. Yes, and apparently he's quite good from what I hear on the celebrity tournament gossip thing um And greg decided that he would form a separate tour And he would go get all of his money from uh

[00:48:13] The guy who bone sawed and dexter'd the american journalist jamal kasogi could coach. I can't say it's him And so that's mbs the saudi raven Prince or king or whatever But he took all of his money from him all of it. That's where all the money came from

[00:48:34] So a lot of people are saying it's blood money this guy bone sawed But greg does have an argument. Well, you know all kinds of other sports are taking money from this guy um football

[00:48:44] Meaning soccer european soccer teams. They're letting the saudi's own things and they call it sports washing Whatever the case I say, okay, greg if you want to start your thing Go ahead If the golfers choose to leave the pga tour though I say Bye bye chicken pie

[00:49:04] You're not we're not doing both Because they they think they have a right. It's always amazing to people when people go I have a right to do that. No, you it's a privilege Right. We I have a party

[00:49:17] I'm inviting you to the party. But there's a dress code. Let's say that's an example If you don't want to wear those clothes, great. You can't come to my party. That's okay

[00:49:26] So we're all even and it's 80 stands time because it'd be like saying we're going to create another football league In europe at the same time as the nfl And you're going to play both And then you're going to fly no

[00:49:40] You sign a contract with this tour. That's just my belief I don't I don't care if they go do it You take your I don't know how you're karma, but it's not even real golf. It's like it's like exhibition golf

[00:49:51] It's like instead of having a real tournament. There's no cuts. They play on teams It's like when I play in a charity thing It's exactly that all they're missing is shots of alcohol on each hole Which they probably have by now

[00:50:05] So if you want to go get their autograph or see them Go ahead But they're gonna fade into obscurity because they don't have a tv contract until they just got one with the cw And i'm like wait that is still a channel. Are you kidding me?

[00:50:19] I remember when the cw like came out and we were all like, what's that? But it was shows like gilmore girls One tree under am I saying that right? One tree Dawson's creek i'll never forget when tom cruise on oprah said

[00:50:39] I love katie holmes. I love dawson creek He didn't even say it right even I knew i'd never seen this show before i'm like no, it's dawson's right Did did her fiance just pronounce her show wrong? Because he is a fake fiance um

[00:50:56] live golf ceo saudi arabian killer CEO live golf ceo on he's speaking on the saudi arabian killing of kashogi Look, this is greg dorvin. I think everybody learns from their mistakes mistake No, they did not think it was a mistake

[00:51:14] They intended to lure the man into the building and then they dexter'd his ass and I think they're very happy with the result Yeah, a mistake is I didn't intentionally mean something and it caused something horrible this

[00:51:29] He said uh, look, I think everybody learns from their mistakes. Darvin said Um when pressed by abran's on whether he thinks the saudi specifically have done so um He said yes, I do

[00:51:40] He said that he had been in saudi arabia building a golf course before becoming the CEO of live golf Which he said was way before any of this who ha ha erupted. He caused the bone Saw a murder of an american the who ha ha

[00:51:55] He said the saudi see that golf is a force for good at the meanwhile The to give no rights to women They're Sports-washing sports-washing The the saudi's the women have no rights If you took woman

[00:52:11] And said that was black people or jewish people or any other group the world would be Oh, they'd be outraged but because it's chicks. It's just us. Well, man. It's part of your religion. You know, I'm sorry

[00:52:22] Sorry, you can't drive cathleen. Sorry. You can't own shit without bringing Shmucky along here to sign for you They don't even talk about that Um golf diplomacy is something i've been extremely passionate about for more than a quarter of a century noran said

[00:52:40] The financial support from saudi arabia whose government has been documented to commit human rights abuses for many years Amnesty international has noted that the saudi regime uses torture as punishment Severely restricts free speech and does not allow protests and has overseen many arbitrary arrests

[00:52:55] Controversy surrounding the regime regimes really reached a new level when kashogi A columnist for the washington post who's been critical of the saudi regime was killed in saudi an embassy and taken out in trash bags By the way, anybody care? No us intelligence and other

[00:53:10] They concluded that the saudi regime specifically saudi crown prince right. He's a prince. I got that right Muhammad bin salam salam Salman salmon salmon mbs way easier was responsible

[00:53:24] Uh norman defended lives golf tides to stay saudi arabia saying people should look how the country is changing its cultures and noting We've all made mistakes. Guess what i've never done greg bonesawed somebody in my house and put them in trash bags matter of fact

[00:53:38] How many people have I met my life? Probably a million I as far as I know Nobody's ever done it So I don't whatever you guys want to take money from the devil go for it But do I think they should be allowed to play?

[00:53:55] On the pga tour. No that does not include the pretty show but you has opened the masters Because those are not part of the pga tour. So that's individually up to them

[00:54:05] Yeah, but it's they'll make the decisions. But here's the other thing. I don't think I don't think they're gonna play very good Because they're not playing real golf They're not playing every week It's like not going on stage if you don't go on stage for a year

[00:54:16] You know you're rusty as shit. It's gonna take some time Do you guys have $1,800 for an hour of consulting any of you changing subjects? Guess who guess who's charging $1,800 an hour for consulting Fire festival billy mcfarland No

[00:54:37] You know what though? Here's what I'll say for billy. He is ferreting out the morons If somebody is willing to pay this idiot That's how much he's charging for a phone call a one-hour phone call

[00:54:50] Billy may find thinks an hour of his valuable time is worth $2,000. This is the fire festival guy in case you guys The convicted con man. He spent time in jail But nothing but time

[00:55:00] It's time while spending four years in prisons for bilking investors out of 26 million recently launched a new scheme that offers advice to tech entrepreneurs for a mere $1,800 the consulting fee is one of the services provided by pirate P y r t pirate

[00:55:16] It's uh, they promise to deliver a virtual reality empowered experience where users can beam themselves onto a tropical island from the comfort of their home And control what happens there Or I could just go there when i'm on vacation. Hello Jamaica here I come

[00:55:33] $1800 i just that just makes me laugh Come on this can't be real somebody in tic tac said being straight out of prison and walks to the next hustle Yes, that's what they do their hustlers are con men. They're not fraudsters Their thieves and the thieves keeps feeling

[00:55:49] Because they get off on it. It's not that he needs it. I mean may now may need it now Moving on Just i'm just saying guard your pocketbooks People don't give that man $1800 an hour

[00:56:03] You could call me and i'll talk to you for nothing. I probably have something better to say it in him Not a lot but something better um This made me laugh so I Do love ozzy osbourne

[00:56:19] I love crazy train. It's probably one of my favorite songs of all time rock wise But I also full disclosure love the voice of the man from the scorpions I do I love that guy's voice it's just

[00:56:33] Some of the clat the hard rockers the clat metal guys or whatever like that scorpion guy's voice is just It's untouchable. I love it. I don't even know the man's name Um, what was their big sound rocky like hurricane? I didn't like that one um change

[00:56:51] I don't know but I love osby ozzy And I even liked the show the oswars. I thought because I like him so much and I like Sharon. She seems fine Klaus mining What in 1948 what in 1948 what were where

[00:57:09] Germany, uh, clouse. Miney who knew that's one of my favorite all-time singers clouse. Miney What were their big hits? I know rocky like a hurricane. I didn't like that song Yeah See definitely leopard was okay, but that guy's voice wasn't anything like the scorpion guy

[00:57:30] No, no early bonjovi So good Um, yeah axl roge's voice was as good as the scorpion guy. What's the scorpion's head? The best of the scorpions. Yes far away Right I'd have to hear it Keep going We can't play it

[00:57:59] You know what i'm i'm gonna listen to it and sing it for you guys next week Rocky like a hurricane the zoo I gotta go listen to these loving you sunday morning. Love you sunday morning, of course class. My name wants to love y'all All right

[00:58:18] Wind change that's the one I probably like I got it good. I'm gonna go listen to it after this I'm gonna sing it next week big city night Big city night. Come on. I gotta listen. All right. I love You love what?

[00:58:32] Cheap trick. Yeah, every single song was great They're like a true though band Like and they weren't really a hair band. They were a rock band right out of the midwest boom

[00:58:44] Coming at you and they know you can't let up or somebody's gonna start throwing shit at you They know they're super aware It's how I feel about being on stage people are like, why don't you stop? Why don't you talk so fast?

[00:58:56] Because I don't want time for somebody to be able to say something. I don't want to get a fight Well, when you do a lot of one-nighters you learn all that shit

[00:59:05] Make the make the slow people keep up. This is a this is a class for the smart kids 26 craziest things Ozzy Osbourne ever did Now reading some of these I didn't know maybe I wouldn't have my love for Ozzy

[00:59:17] But he was super drunk or super undragged. So, you know Now that he's not on all that I think he's super sweet. I see the sweet side And I just love that he went with the prince of darkness me and my cousin Tommy

[00:59:31] We were all in with Ozzy. Yeah, like everybody else was kind of more bond jovie e and me and Tommy were like no The prince of darkness is coming to st. Louis more fucking going

[00:59:46] Ozzy Osbourne and it's so sad he's got a retire. He's sick. He's got a lot of problems And he was going he wanted to keep going but he's got back issues in Parkinson's I don't know what the whole list is but it's a lot. Um

[00:59:58] Here's the craziest things he ever did This is one through 13 Arrested and convicted for burglary Yeah, he must have been like 11 because this starts way back Uh Number two Ozzy took revenge on teacher. Let me I don't really understand. Okay. Here we go. This is better

[01:00:19] No, no, no, I got the real thing Born in 1948 He graduated high school in 15. They graduate younger than the uk the us before Ozzy turned 18 He was arrested convicted for burglary and sentenced to three months in prison

[01:00:33] He had to do the time because his father refused to pay the fine My dad would have made us sit there. No question about well, maybe not the girls Clearly he missed the lesson Yeah, it didn't work making him sit there. He didn't think about shit

[01:00:48] He just thought about what he's gonna do when he's get out number two He gets revenge on his teacher while still in school Ozzy's metal shop teacher mr. Lane often punished Ozzy by slapping him on the ass with a piece of wood

[01:00:59] To get even Ozzy liked to heat up a penny for three or four minutes Then slip it into mr. Lane's desk at some point mr. Lane Out of would pick up the penny out of curiosity and burn his fingers Ozzy would get a good laugh Wow

[01:01:19] Wow, wow, wow, wow Number three Ozzy worked at a slaughterhouse while still a teenager Ozzy got a position in the slaughterhouse. His job was to kill cows

[01:01:29] Whoa, listen is his job was to kill cows by shooting them in the head with a gun that fired a steel spike Holy shit, and he's a teenager and you wonder why he becomes a prince of darkness. You're making him shoot cows He's a crazy person well

[01:01:52] Number four while singing with earth the band that would eventually become black Sabbath Ozzy in an effort to always play the clown would do just anything to get the audience's attention One time he found some purple paint backstage and covered his nose with it

[01:02:04] Unfortunately, the paint was indelible and it didn't wear off for six weeks number five Ozzy's hotel was invaded by Satanist While on the road with black Sabbath of the early 70s the hotel where the band was staying was invaded by Satanist

[01:02:21] Some would camp out in front of Ozzy's hotel room to get rid of these fanatics Ozzy blew out their candles and sang happy birthday to I remember one time nick schwarzen told me

[01:02:36] The comedian nick schwarzen who I love he he had his boss out somewhere and he's like He's like, yeah, but Kathleen like your fans are normal people. He was mine just aren't normal He said like Friday night. There were a bunch of them dressed like wizards

[01:02:51] And they had crystal balls and they were outside their tour bus going nick. We know you're in there come out And I But I know nick could go out there because he probably think they had good stuff of some sort Number six drove drunk to the hospital

[01:03:09] When Ozzy's first wife Thelma Riley being giving birth to Ozzy's first child Jessica starshine Osborn Thelma insisted he drive her to the hospital. Trouble was Ozzy was drunk And he didn't have a driver's license didn't care drove her anyway Uh

[01:03:26] Number seven used penicillin to cover up hers affairs at the end of his tour in 1972 He'd been sampling groupies for months got a blast at penicillin before returning home to the mrs Wow Um, I didn't like this one. He shot a bunch of cats. That's not nice

[01:03:44] Yeah, he was completely drunk. He said he really regrets it um He got uh Yeah, they had a lot of new cars But the cars had all these scratches on it and then he discovered the straight click cats were climbing on it

[01:03:58] One night. He was super super drunk Um, and he whipped out his shotgun Yeah, number 90 accidentally drugged a vicar Oh, wow What's a vicar like a senator? Like a priest? One day the vicar paid the oswarns a visit Ozzy's member at the church of england

[01:04:21] Thelma inadvertently gave the priest a piece of cake that Ozzy had laced with some potent afghan hash Soon the vicar the vicar passed out and they had to carry him home for three days. The vicar was

[01:04:36] Ripped and unfortunately for the oswarns. He didn't remember what happened to him 10 on a flight home from england Ozzy was carrying four grams of cocaine in his sock worried about taking the dope through customs. Ozzy gave the coke to the

[01:04:50] Uh flight attendant who snorted this stuff while still working on the plane. Wow. Good job kids 11 Oh my god, he said chickens on fire at a fit of rage Thelma in an effort to keep Ozzy from partying all the time

[01:05:04] Bought him a chicken coop filled with chickens, but he hated chickens and he hated feeding them one night Well drunk. He took his shotgun and the chicken coop began shooting the birds I

[01:05:14] He's then he set fire to it into the flames and he threw live shotgun carriages into the flames Yeah, now if I didn't own these things that have been like that's not very nice Even if you're drunk, I wouldn't kill an animal Right Right well

[01:05:33] No, I wouldn't there's even even a possum they eat ticks you got to find something good in all the animals and So that's what st. Francis of a cc for me to tell you 12

[01:05:45] Ozzy stripped in public one night during the blizzard of os to our germany. I remember that what a great name the blizzard of Oz While dining with some straight lace folks Ozzy climbed onto the table and began doing his triptease once naked

[01:05:58] He urinated into a man's carafe wine. Afterwards. He wasn't invited back to germany for many years I'm sure they like the scorpions this man is crazy. What does he doing? What does the matter with him? We are drunk too, but we are not doing this. We are not

[01:06:17] 13 he bit the head off a dove Okay, look I've been super bored in meetings in los angeles so bored that like I don't know I drift out and like I can't even come back. I'm so far gone

[01:06:35] Till somebody just hands me a box all I try to do is get free fiji water out of those meetings I just like do you have any water? I'm like do you have fiji? It's my favorite

[01:06:45] It's 19. I can see getting super bored. I've been there, but this is crazy During a meeting at cbs records Ozzy then a solo orders in order to intimidate the public relations people Pulled out a dove of his pocket

[01:06:57] Bit its head off and threw it on the table where it twitched about spilling blood and feces everywhere somebody Shouted get this animal out of here now Which one then they threw Ozzy from the premises Um Then there's some stupid ones bit the head off the dead bat

[01:07:16] But this was a mistake And I'll never forget because the midwest we thought we were so famous because it was in demoyne So missouri kind of we feel like we round up to iowa iowa rounds down to us

[01:07:28] It's all fine during one performance somebody in the audience threw something at Ozzy He thought it was a rubber bat. So he picked it up and chomped it down Realizing something was wrong. He spit out a live bat He then had to get rabies shots

[01:07:43] How did somebody this is just tells you uh when we were young how lack of security there was anywhere Somebody just walked in with a live bat in their pocket. Yeah, right. Yeah Oh, I remember this he he it says 16 took a piss on the alamo

[01:07:58] While touring the tech sanatone texas he got drunk one night and Sharon the one we know was his way took Took Ozzy's clothes hoping to keep him in the hotel and out of trouble Oh Here's what I don't do with a drunk

[01:08:12] Take put them naked and hope that makes them stay right But Ozzy don one of Sharon's dresses and took a walk He found one of her dresses later while still dressed in her dress

[01:08:29] He took a leak on the walls of the alamo historical national monument where the cops busted him It was decades before he was loud. So at this point in his life, he can't go to germany What is that a todo? Then there's just a bunch of stupid one

[01:08:45] um He got thrown out of a concentration camp I mean, come on Ozzy he got back to germany And he was seeing the sights and he may have been the only person thrown out of dockeye concentration camp

[01:08:57] He was drunk. I don't know what he said or did this one is insane We're almost done Surfed atop an aerial tramway this time in albuquerque new mexico while drunk and coked out of his head

[01:09:11] Ozzy took a ride in an aerial tramway when the vehicle suddenly stopped a thousand feet up Ozzy took a ladder to the roof of the vehicle lifted the hatch and climbed on top of it Then the thing started moving again

[01:09:23] Ozzy rode on top his arms wide as if surfing in malibu Uh, i'm skip. I'm skipping a bunch uh during 2002 when the oswars was one of the first first tv reality shows Which my friend jeff stilson. Yeah. Yeah jeff stilson was a big part of that um

[01:09:50] He was taken as many as 25 vikadin pills per day Ozzy was And this was as many as 42 different prescription drugs he consumed on a daily basis Wow That's crazy

[01:10:02] Well, this just shows you guys if you want to do all these drugs and shit you you can and you might live But your old age is going to be miserable. It's gonna the bill will come do i mean It's not a good ending

[01:10:15] Um, he did throw a 50 inch tv set through the ninth floor window of a hotel and let it fall to the pavement It's something oszy had always wanted to do Really? Can't say the urge has ever struck me

[01:10:28] When the tv set hit the ground it exploded like a nuclear bomb. He was charged 38 000 for the destruction of the television Yeah, so You know, there's some bad things in there. Mama. I'm coming home. I love that song. I love so many of his songs um

[01:10:46] He just seems like when he's not on drugs and he's not drunk I like he has a very good sense of humor. He's a funny guy not necessarily intentionally. He's silly He's very goofy seems to love his kids and he's done bad things animal

[01:11:00] But I can forgive it now because he has all those little dogs that were in the reality show and he loves each and every one of them I think he's come around

[01:11:08] He probably has done asp anything he should do them if he has not to try to um I think it's time for the feel-good story um, let me find it This is such a feel-good story These are the things that you go. Okay

[01:11:26] A dog was lost for 36 hours 36 hours. Then it rang an animal shelters doorbell The animal rescue league of alpaso sounded the alarm on its facebook page Bailey was missing

[01:11:40] And its locals needed to keep an eye out and notify the shelter if she was spotted bailey looks like a A mutt mutt mutt Shepardy giant smile, but not all shepherd many other things her ears go down Not like a shepherd just your regular all

[01:11:57] furry kind of lab shepherd mixed mutt Ish People soon called in others joined the research team her owner scoured the city deep into the night all for not

[01:12:09] Bailey remained on the loose at the risk of being run over ravaged by an animal or falling prey to some unknown horror In on the unforgiving west texas desert Then deep into the second Night night, I don't know I'm missing a sentence here. Sorry

[01:12:27] Uh her doorbell. This is the doorbell Of the shelter Her doorbell camera cameoed Ended a 36 hour search for a dog that did not need to be rescued bailey knew where she was going and traveled 10 miles to get there

[01:12:43] But now she faced an obstacle she could not overcome without a key or a opposable thumb She needed someone to let her in She had been rescued by this out of this place this person I'll explain it to she had been taken back because she kept running away

[01:12:58] She wasn't a very well behaved little guy girl and um But she ran from the person who rescued her 10 miles back to here Um with she needed someone to let her in bailey first came to the animal rescue

[01:13:12] Leaveel passed them more than a year ago after housing her for a few months another a shelter transfer to the rescue league In the hopes that higher foot traffic would lead to her adoption. She's super cute too. She doesn't look menacing or nothing like that

[01:13:24] She's adorable despite the boost bailey language at the rescue league for more than a year because it's some of the quirks that were not easy for people to Overcome including being hyper undrained and a bit of an escape artist according to league rescue director loretta hide

[01:13:38] She spent most of her life in the shelter Adding that bailey took an obedience course during her time at the rescue league um baileys quirks Bubbled up after she was adopted a few months ago hide said her new owner

[01:13:51] Returned her returned her three days later on because bailey escaped from her crate and destroyed a piece of artwork About a month later a second owner adopted her. He had already he already had a feral dog

[01:14:02] And had painstakingly trained that he had painstakingly trained trained for a year After a few visits to make sure the two got along he brought bailey into the fold Taking the two dogs with him every day to his job training teaching and competing in martial arts

[01:14:16] All was going well until around noon on january 29th when bailey slipped Her owner's grasp as he tried to fit her for a new carner since she bolted She he chased her on foot and then by car, but she alluded both efforts

[01:14:28] So he called the shelter but which put out an allergic uh alert an urgent alert on his facebook page Uh that night informing its 33 000 followers that bailey was on the loose and asking them for any settings. There were over

[01:14:40] There were at least three over the next 30 hours six hours But none panned out by the time the shelter workers arrived at each location. She was already gone She was running away one of the shelters employees was

[01:14:50] At home in bed and nearly asleep when she heard a loud ding from her phone The noise meant there was someone pushing the shelter's ring doorbell Oh my god, but it was 115 at the morning. No one would be there this late

[01:15:01] She thought thinks thinking maybe she was dreaming then a second ding and finally a robotic voice emanated from the phone Someone is at your door a noise. She got up to check she opened the ring app which showed the image

[01:15:13] Of the late night caller with two bdi's glowing into the dark Then the animal's full body came in if you my interview. Oh my god. I thought is that bailey She ran to her daughter's room. Genevieve's also worked at the shelter

[01:15:26] And she wanted her opinion they unmuted the doorbells microphone so they could speak with the dog outside of the shelter bailey Bailey is at you her head popped up to fill the entire screen followed by whining and scratching at the door

[01:15:37] Her and her daughter hopped in the car and headed to the shelter. They drove Um why they kept talking to the dog on the phone while they drove so she wouldn't wait. Mm-hmm It took them 15 minutes to get there When they did bailey was ecstatic

[01:15:52] Ariata secured her in the harness and led her into the shelter bailey muscled her way back into the kennel where she had Live more than a year. They fed her and let her rest later that morning. They notified her owner that the dog found safe

[01:16:02] Hyde said she gave him a bit of a scolding when he arrived telling him to be more careful They yelled at the adoptee guy Hey, you know what he's willing to take her any is willing to work hard How about say sorry she got away from you? Yeah

[01:16:14] Yeah He agreed to walk her using two leashes and get a collar outfitted with the tracker We're just looking at she made it across all these super busy streets and not get smooth. She has some street smarts as well

[01:16:25] Um during her trip. She traveled 10 miles crossing over a main dragon el paso and interstate 10 That is not a highway to mess with that's a very big Interstate to somehow find her way back to the shelter

[01:16:37] She lived at the shelter for so long. This was home to her So isn't that a nice story? That's great. Yeah bailey's fine. Yep bailey is fine in el paso Okay termites, um I well

[01:16:56] I'm gonna say it because by the time I get back it'll already be done For valentine's day i'm sneaking down to Atlanta to go see one miss Anita baker She does not know yet. I will Let her know that tomorrow

[01:17:17] I always think if it's show days, I just I like it when people say the day of the show bought tickets will be there tonight If you're busy, no worries. If you're not We'll have a beer whatever

[01:17:30] Um, I'm very excited about that. Will you bring me a t-shirt? I will bring you a t-shirt. Thank you. I'll have dorf buy it Dorf gets bored a lot so I'm always just like go buy shirts

[01:17:45] Hey, what do it? Hey, what do it? Um, where are you going? This weekend is the rhyman Nashville There's still a few seats left and here's the thing people because I go to shows at the rhyman too

[01:17:59] I mean, I know what it's like to be a customer. They don't necessarily want the wing things Um, but I've sat in those wings and they're fine. Yeah, especially for comedy You don't really It's not I don't know comedy to me if you can hear me

[01:18:13] I always look up. I make sure I look everywhere. I mean i'm cognizant that some people see it's aren't directly in front of me um There's not a bad seat in the rhyman. It's a giant church. I mean, it's a giant pews old school It's fantastic

[01:18:28] And uh, they make you your own little poster It's it's just it's a very special gig. There's like I don't know. I could the agents call them marquee gigs. I would call them marquee gigs There's probably five a year chicago theater, you know, the big historical

[01:18:44] The warner dc is yeah, well, there's a lot once I start thinking about it too hard There's a lot. Yeah, but the rhyman is in itself its own category Because it's where the grand old opera used to be Then they moved it

[01:18:57] But the church pews, I mean, there's nowhere else that I do shows like that and the sound if you just stand there on stage I don't know comedians don't really care about sound. We just need the volume loud

[01:19:06] But we don't sit there like bands and do sound checks and hear we don't hear weird shit We just it's just your voice But we we don't have the interest season and it's so complicated for music. It seems to be I don't know

[01:19:17] It's not for us. Just here's my voice make a love You could stand there on the stage without a mic and be fine The acoustics are so because when they built it, they didn't have mics

[01:19:28] So they had to go okay, but how do they know all that back then? I have no idea Anywho, I will see you termites and then after the rhyman New Orleans and we added a second show for the vampire b-ball Trey Mahoney of what?

[01:19:46] Mary Mahoney's is my favorite restaurant in the entire United States. Seriously The crab claws there are just Trey sent me some from Super Bowl because I asked I've never asked before

[01:19:58] I felt stupid asking because he probably paid in the ass to mail, but he did it and the gumbo Yeah That's technically in Biloxi, but he's coming to New Orleans. I have a lot of friends coming to that show, which would be fun

[01:20:15] Red bank auntie din I think those are almost sold out If not already sold out memphis Yeah, we need more people to come to memphis because that was a we added that show late

[01:20:23] It wasn't part of the normal schedule. So mem mem facitos. Is that the show? It's one of those shoes called Mem, my mom loves them. I don't know um Memphis it's at a new place. I've never been the Graceland soundstage. Yeah, I don't even know and then Milwaukee

[01:20:43] You can find me at the Milwaukee cheese market. It's called the public market. I call it the cheese market uh Was that Foxwoods that sold out Two Boston shows we added a late show. We got tickets for that one first one sold out Yep Superdipper fun

[01:21:05] And opening at the rhyming is mr. Dusty slay Who is beyond a headliner in his own right? I could not believe he was available and I could not believe he said yes I'm so grateful and excited For my own self. He makes me laugh

[01:21:19] Really hard and to be able to say sides stand side stage and His joke about He grew up like in a trailer and so and he's joke about all of his clothes had wolves on him The whole joke makes me laugh

[01:21:32] Because like in hillbilly cast issues there are once you've heard his whole joke and stuff But I thought it too like in the Ozarks. Why does everything have a wolf on it? Like we're not really It's not canada Wolves aren't really a Missouri or a Tennessee Yeah, anyway

[01:21:49] So that's it turn it's all right um Special comes up February 24 go. Okay. So I told you guys to watch jn j a n n I made lou watch it. He's laughing so hard So there's three seasons in america because it's a canadian show

[01:22:07] You have to have roku But now it's just an app because all my friends are like oh, I used to have a roku stick No, no, no, you don't need that. It's just an app Just download it and it's free and i'm telling you

[01:22:19] I don't laugh at a lot of shit, but that show I'm gonna go back and watch season one because louis told me stuff from season one I'd forgotten about because I just watched all season three. So that's a little comedy tip

[01:22:33] Jan doesn't need americans. She's got if she wants a canadian star. She knows how to pluck them out They've had katie lang and they all make fun of themselves Sarah mclaughlin's so funny Michael buble was off the charts funny and then secretly they all make fun of salindia

[01:22:50] Which I love Because they know she's the only global star at least that's what they It's least at least that's what they're saying I think michael and jan and that might be more global than they think but certainly saline Um, all right termites. That's all I got

[01:23:08] You'd be good valentines uh as my friend would say valentines Termites and we're almost to spring Yep, no, we're not there yet though settle your termites down you still got a couple more weeks of winter

[01:23:23] Hunker down although winter's not been not not that bad not even in new york I talk to louis every day not in st. Louis not in nashville. It's been pretty mild 62 degrees out today