Leadership GPS: Leading through the ”Trash Days”

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[00:00:44] My name is Alan Jackson and with me across the table is Tony Jackson

[00:00:47] How are you doing dad? I'm good Alan how are you doing? I'm doing okay although

[00:00:51] you seem a little off today dad

[00:00:55] I hope you don't mind me saying that. I mean, I don't. I'll keep your thoughts to yourself if you're not up.

[00:01:00] It's just seem a little down you know. Maybe a four on a scale of ten.

[00:01:05] Okay well not a great day. Well maybe our conversation here in a minute can talk through what that means

[00:01:10] because I think the topic we're going to talk about is leaders living through trash days

[00:01:15] and we're going to define what all that means in a minute. We'll kind of leave the listeners hanging for a bit

[00:01:20] but maybe we can get Tony out of his funk a little bit and talk about how other leaders are working through their trash days

[00:01:27] here on Leadership GPS. But before we get into that conversation, we do want to give a special announcement

[00:01:33] and remind you that we are very very happy and proud to be sponsored by the Greater Hickory Kia Classic

[00:01:39] going on October 13th through the 19th 2014 here in Catawba County

[00:01:45] actually more specifically the town of Conover North Carolina where you're going to be having a great great golf classic tournament

[00:01:52] going on at Rock Barn Golf and Spa again through October 13th through the 19th.

[00:01:57] We're just really really happy to be a partner with the organization once again. I think this is our second year in a row

[00:02:02] being affiliated with the tournament and you can find more information about the classic at

[00:02:07] greaterhickorykiaclassic.com all one big word but exactly like it sounds

[00:02:13] greaterhickorykiaclassic.com

[00:02:17] That's where you want to go to get your tickets and more information about this great golf tournament

[00:02:21] really is a big asset for our community. It's a nationally known tournament, PGA level tournament

[00:02:27] some great things happening there so we're really happy to have the tournament here once again

[00:02:31] in Catawba County and partnering with the Mesh once again this year.

[00:02:36] So my name is Alan Jackson with the Jackson Group and this is Tony Jackson with Drive Leadership

[00:02:41] and we get together and talk about the idea of leadership and what advice and dialogue we can have

[00:02:47] for people that are maybe looking to improve their own leadership skills going forward

[00:02:51] maybe they've got some, they're looking for some higher aspiration roles within an organization

[00:02:56] maybe they're just trying to refine their role as a leader in that organization

[00:02:59] and we're here to help. We're here to talk a little bit about some things we've learned and see from both our perspectives.

[00:03:05] As I led into the topic there dad talking about leaders living through trash days

[00:03:09] and it's an intriguing title you've got the word trash in there which can be interpreted a couple different ways

[00:03:15] why don't we just start out and you tell me what do you mean by when we call something a trash day for a leader?

[00:03:20] Let me tell you why I even wanted to have this topic for today.

[00:03:25] If I go back over our podcast together Alan we've been focused on the positive side of leadership

[00:03:31] what leaders do well, how they can do better and what they do

[00:03:35] but we really haven't focused at all on the fact that the person is separate from the leader

[00:03:41] and sometimes the leader is separate from the person. There's always a person behind their leadership role

[00:03:47] and leaders are not always perfect, people are not always perfect

[00:03:52] we all have our ups and downs and in fact I guess if I was to do a poll about leadership

[00:03:58] and those in leadership positions across the country I guarantee that we would never find anyone

[00:04:04] who would say every day is a great day for them.

[00:04:08] If they did I would be very suspicious, think they're on medication or something going on with them

[00:04:13] or just trying to make a positive impression. The fact is that everyone

[00:04:18] know they were in the leadership position right half down days. They have days that don't go well

[00:04:23] they have tough days, they have difficult days, they have bad days, they have stressful days

[00:04:27] I call them trash days. In fact everybody has trash days because some days you get to the end of the day

[00:04:34] and say what in the world did I do today? Or why did that happen?

[00:04:39] Or man I'm in the gully at the end of the day, I'm not sure why but I'm there.

[00:04:44] So I think it's a realistic thing to talk about and I'll bring it home with three people I've talked to in the last couple weeks

[00:04:50] that I'm doing individual leadership consultation with. And these three brought to me a slice of this

[00:04:56] trash day type of phenomenon that we want to talk about.

[00:05:00] Coming from different perspectives. One of which was a new manager, a bright

[00:05:06] invigorating type of person really on the ball sharp as a tack, been entrusted with a lot of responsibility

[00:05:12] in our organization and I've been working with her through three sessions now and she came in that particular

[00:05:17] last session I was there and this was in another state. She said now she just didn't look like she was with herself

[00:05:23] and she liked to be spotted with me. Let's ask her what's going on? She said I don't know, it's just one of those days

[00:05:30] and honestly I don't know if I want to stay in a leisure program. She was at that point.

[00:05:35] I'll carry on with that a little bit further.

[00:05:39] Second example was a person who also worked with another female in this particular case and she is actually the head of

[00:05:49] what's head of the emergency department in an organization, a large organization and things weren't going well for her.

[00:05:57] She had a lot of difficult days in a row. She had a continual downslide in her career actually as a leader in that organization

[00:06:06] because, well, a number of reasons. It's a tough life in other words and she recently made a change.

[00:06:14] So I re-engaged with her after she had been in her new role, not a leadership position but in a new role for about the last

[00:06:22] three weeks and I talked to her the other day and I said so how's it going? She said this is such a great life.

[00:06:30] I never knew it could be this good. I didn't realize what kind of stress I was under in my previous job until I'm out of it.

[00:06:37] She said I'll never go back into a leisure role. Kind of a bad thing to say, I didn't like it here and say that but you know it's realistic for her.

[00:06:46] Now just keep in mind all listeners, you don't have to go and follow the role of some of the examples we're saying here.

[00:06:53] We want you to stay leaders but it's an interesting example to hear somebody so vividly say that.

[00:06:59] Come back later to why she actually got to that positive thing.

[00:07:03] And then the third example is another high level executive who is always giving more than what's ever required of her in the role she's in.

[00:07:12] But she was never feeling appreciated for and it continued on for a long time so on and so forth.

[00:07:17] Last week or two weeks ago I met with her and she walked into the room and she just seemed upbeat and positive and all that.

[00:07:23] And I said what in the world is going on with you? You look great and you sound great.

[00:07:27] She said well I'm feeling great. I said why? She said because I've decided I'm never going to give this place 200% again.

[00:07:33] I'll give it 100% but I'm never giving 200%.

[00:07:36] And she got to that point because there was just not the presence of things coming back to her reciprocity we call it.

[00:07:42] Getting back what she feels she was giving up in that role for that organization.

[00:07:47] If you take those three scenarios out and they're really coming from three different points of focus about things affecting them

[00:07:54] that was accumulation of too many bad trashy days in a row.

[00:08:00] Now let's put it in perspective. We all have bad days. We've already said that.

[00:08:05] We don't always know when they're coming. Sometimes we do. Sometimes we look for them to happen and they do.

[00:08:10] In fact I'm a firm believer if you look for evidence of a bad day in your life you're going to find it.

[00:08:16] Sometimes we make it come about.

[00:08:18] So let's accept the fact there's always going to be some bad days particularly for leaders.

[00:08:23] We're going to get into a while for that in a few minutes.

[00:08:26] But I think the basic question is why even bring up the question about how to make it through tough trashy days anyway?

[00:08:32] Well the first thing is we know that trashy days, bad days take its toll on people.

[00:08:37] Too many others in a row, too much stress, too many inconsistencies in ways of getting things done.

[00:08:43] Inconsistency about managing ourselves leads to not only poor performance and personal disappointment

[00:08:48] but also instead of just showing this it leads to a decrease in the cognitive functioning of a person's performance.

[00:08:55] The thinking ability, the processing ability of things.

[00:08:58] So having too many of these trashy days in a row can actually impact your ability to think through situations

[00:09:04] and make cognitive decisions and strategic deals?

[00:09:06] Absolutely. Not even on a particular run of those, even on a particular day.

[00:09:10] In other words it does something to us physically and emotionally.

[00:09:15] So we need to be aware that that's the penalties we pay for maybe not making it successfully through trashy days.

[00:09:22] We're also on the other side that a study has been done fairly recently that said that 90% of top performers

[00:09:29] and I don't know how they classified that, 90% of top performers are skilled at managing their own personal emotions during difficult times.

[00:09:39] So in order to be effective and on top of the game people know how to handle themselves and manage themselves.

[00:09:44] So that is a, what we're saying is that is a key attribute of top performing leaders and all that.

[00:09:49] They know how to handle their emotional side of themselves.

[00:09:51] They figured it out.

[00:09:52] You're in tough days, tough times or whatever. Yeah they can manage around through over or with bad trashy days.

[00:09:58] So it could be argued that the people that are not top performing leaders

[00:10:02] maybe one of the reasons they're not is because they haven't figured out how to really manage those emotions during those tough days.

[00:10:08] The way I put it is that I tell people like this a lot of times that leaders who are not feeling successful are probably their own worst enemies.

[00:10:16] It's not the nature of the work, it's not even the organization they're in all the time.

[00:10:21] It's their own worst enemies cause they don't have, they haven't built up a good arsenal of coping skills,

[00:10:28] self preservation skills, success skills, points and that type of thing to make it through the tough days consistently.

[00:10:36] It all's making sense as you're describing it. I can definitely see the connections they were saying.

[00:10:40] And you've been around people and when a leader has a bad day it shows everybody cause everybody's looking at two leaders.

[00:10:46] They really are. Are you going to sneeze or what?

[00:10:48] I'm going to read a sneeze. I'm holding my nose here just so I know nobody can see me doing this.

[00:10:53] I can see it. I didn't know you were about to sneeze either. Maybe there was something in the room, I don't know, otherwise.

[00:10:59] A little dusty in the room or something. No, it's definitely not emotional.

[00:11:03] No, just give me a sneeze. And it's gone. Okay, I'm good. We'll keep moving on.

[00:11:09] So I know the key question here is if we know that we're going to have bad days or trashy days

[00:11:17] and we know that a leader is very visible when they're having bad trashy days in terms of how they react to it.

[00:11:23] We know that leaders sometimes can be their own worst enemies about being able to handle difficult trashy days.

[00:11:29] Then I guess the logical question is first of all, is anything good about trashy days that we can take away from it?

[00:11:35] Secondly, is to say, alright, so what do we do? If they're going to be there, what's our strategy?

[00:11:40] How do we work through around on top of or with trashy days so that we just not sunk by it?

[00:11:48] Right, and because human beings instinctively, we can react sometimes, and many of us more reactionary than others,

[00:11:56] to a bad day or a couple bad days. And sometimes it can be some rash decisions that probably don't need to be making

[00:12:02] just because we're having a few bad days. So knowing how to understand that and how to work with them,

[00:12:07] I think can actually be beneficial for a long-term career so we're not just responding to those trash days.

[00:12:12] Let me ask you, the first thing we have to do is analyze what a tough day is for a lot of people

[00:12:17] and help them understand that as well. I ask a lot of people I do consulting with individually,

[00:12:23] I ask them for an assessment of how their last week or two as a leader has been.

[00:12:27] And then I'll ask them to say, how do you feel at the end of most of your days in this role?

[00:12:33] Do you feel elated, accomplished, successful, on top of the world or demoralized, defeated, unsuccessful,

[00:12:41] glad it's over, or are you just like, it's okay. And based on how many of those types of responses

[00:12:48] you get from the person in succession as I work with them, you can really tell whether or not

[00:12:52] they are enabling themselves to deal with tough days that are going to occur in their roles or not.

[00:12:58] For example, somebody who always tells me the best thing about every day is five o'clock.

[00:13:03] Five o'clock going home? Yeah. I tell you an awful lot right there. It does.

[00:13:06] They're not finding success in their work. Sure.

[00:13:09] So let me ask you, Alan, what is a tough day for you? What makes a day tough for you or trashy for you

[00:13:15] or difficult for you? Well, I think mine's probably pretty common with a lot of leaders.

[00:13:19] I think we all have grand aspirations of what we're going to accomplish in a certain day.

[00:13:23] We have certain goals to say these are projects we're going to work on,

[00:13:26] these are things we're going to do, these are people we're going to meet with, whatever it may be.

[00:13:30] And when your day kind of just goes to pot, I mean, just nothing is working like it should.

[00:13:34] We come away from the end of the day defeated feeling like we didn't move forward on anything

[00:13:39] we were going to do. We were more held back by a lot of things I got put on our plate

[00:13:43] or things we had to get involved with. That to me is a pretty typical trashy day.

[00:13:46] It is typical for most people in fact, from what I understand, from what I hear from people

[00:13:50] on that, but there's a lot of, a lot that can go into that.

[00:13:53] You mentioned the first one and I think we make people more aware of.

[00:13:58] Leaders by their nature are accomplished people and accomplishing people.

[00:14:02] They got to where they are because they are accomplished in what they do

[00:14:06] and skillful in that, but they're accomplishing because they are,

[00:14:10] in some degrees, performance driven people. They want to get things done.

[00:14:14] They want to make things happen. They want to be instrumental in making things happen

[00:14:17] and that's what makes them a good leader. However, sometimes we're not very kind ourselves with that.

[00:14:22] We set the bar unreasonably high. We set the bar in an exaggerated fashion

[00:14:29] just like you said, thinking we'd get a lot more done during the day

[00:14:32] than we actually can get done. But we still set that bar.

[00:14:35] We make our list. Are you a list maker?

[00:14:37] Absolutely, I'm a list maker.

[00:14:39] One of the greatest joys of my life is scratching anything off the list

[00:14:42] tearing the whole list up and rewriting the list again just a little bit shorter than it was before.

[00:14:46] Do you ever accomplish everything on your list?

[00:14:49] Well, there you go. So why is it on your list?

[00:14:52] Why is my list so extensive? Why does it have so many things when I should know by now

[00:14:56] I won't get these things done. There may be that one thing I need to pick out and say,

[00:15:00] I've got to get that done. The rest can be later.

[00:15:03] Let me free up the rest of my time to take care of things that may come up

[00:15:06] and be really reactionary to things.

[00:15:08] That's why I think we're not too gentle ourselves sometimes

[00:15:11] is that we beat ourselves up because we didn't get everything on our list done that day

[00:15:15] that we thought we would get done. But you know what?

[00:15:18] Leaders live in a complex world. If we're an organizational leader,

[00:15:21] we're living complex organizations where a lot of our time is spent on OPPs,

[00:15:26] other people's priorities, not our own.

[00:15:29] It's not only a stressful world but the whole role of a leader is to be responsive.

[00:15:34] That means we don't always have control over how we spend our day during the day.

[00:15:38] We don't have control over those elements because somebody pops in

[00:15:43] or because we're trying to be responsive and say, sure, come on in.

[00:15:46] There goes 30 minutes of time or an hour of time or 15 minutes of time

[00:15:49] that you were going to spend on something else.

[00:15:51] Unfortunately some people don't handle that well.

[00:15:53] This is that emotional side of the leaders that we talked about.

[00:15:56] If they don't handle that well, they'll sit there listening to that person

[00:15:59] who just happened to pop by and they won't be truly listening.

[00:16:04] They'll be feigning listening.

[00:16:06] And all the time in their mind they're thinking of what they wish they were doing

[00:16:09] but are not getting done.

[00:16:11] And even sometimes feeling a little bit resentful about inviting that person in.

[00:16:16] Or why are they bringing me this?

[00:16:18] Don't they know I'm busy?

[00:16:20] That's ill use of our time and our mentality and our emotional intelligence

[00:16:24] based on this whole thing about Trashy Days where we're interrupted.

[00:16:27] So even extending that example, let's say that person, that leader

[00:16:30] that is growing a little resentful of the fact that somebody is now talking to them

[00:16:35] or they're in a meeting that they didn't feel like they needed to be in

[00:16:37] and it's now keeping them from their long list of things they were going to do today.

[00:16:41] A, problem number one is they created a long list of things to do today

[00:16:44] that was probably very unreasonable.

[00:16:46] Two, they're now letting this in what they see maybe as an intrusion or distraction

[00:16:52] affect their attitude during it

[00:16:55] which means that interaction is not going to be as positive as it could be.

[00:16:58] They probably are adding more to their plate

[00:17:01] by them not being as engaged in that conversation as they needed to be.

[00:17:05] It's probably going to have a ripple effect of more things they've got to follow up on

[00:17:08] or do or handle again.

[00:17:10] So it all comes back to we set the expectation of

[00:17:13] we're going to get all these things done and if anything gets in our way

[00:17:16] it's going to be an irritation when we should have been giving ourselves a lot more leeway

[00:17:21] to be able to do the things that a leader has to do on a regular basis.

[00:17:24] If you think of the logic, it's almost a mathematical issue.

[00:17:28] Think about the number of hours you have on the job in the day.

[00:17:33] For some people it's a lot of time, you know, 8, 10, 12, 15 hours.

[00:17:37] But let's just take an eight hour day or a 10 hour day for a leader

[00:17:41] who is committed to doing a good job

[00:17:43] and they are accomplished and they want to accomplish

[00:17:46] and they want to do the things on the list.

[00:17:48] Maybe they're performance dependent meaning that they create health

[00:17:51] good they feel about themselves with how much I got done.

[00:17:54] It's not a healthy thing but it happens.

[00:17:57] So sometimes it's just a math thing.

[00:18:00] Why do we then block out or fill up every ounce of that day

[00:18:04] with things we think we have to get done?

[00:18:06] If our job is to be responsive as leaders

[00:18:08] why not build in responsiveness time?

[00:18:11] And that also might mean when that person stops by the door

[00:18:14] saying you got a minute rather than saying as gracious as we are

[00:18:17] sure come on in.

[00:18:19] It's almost like saying sure whatever you have is

[00:18:23] I'm sure more important when I'm working on it now.

[00:18:25] Set some limits and you say

[00:18:27] I'd love to talk to you unless it's urgent

[00:18:29] can we eat till tomorrow morning.

[00:18:31] I can pay attention.

[00:18:34] And you know that's the tough thing too because I think as leaders

[00:18:37] we're all told that we need to be very responsive to staff

[00:18:40] we need to be responsive to coworkers

[00:18:42] we need to be able to listen

[00:18:43] we need to have the open door policy all that things

[00:18:45] which I think what you're saying is

[00:18:47] it's not that we don't have an open door policy

[00:18:49] it's an open door policy but with some structure to it

[00:18:52] so it doesn't throw us off on everything else

[00:18:54] that we were going to get done.

[00:18:56] It's okay to say I want to talk to you

[00:18:58] this is an open door policy however can it be tomorrow morning

[00:19:02] because I can give you more of my full attention

[00:19:04] and we can really dig into something.

[00:19:06] Don't just push them aside

[00:19:08] but make sure there are some control points.

[00:19:12] So let's take a look you said that made for a tough day

[00:19:16] for you and I think probably 80-90% of people would say that as well

[00:19:19] but there are other reasons it could be a trashy day.

[00:19:22] So one that you focused on there is not feeling accomplished

[00:19:25] not getting things done that you had on your list to get done.

[00:19:28] Now you're an extroverted person Alan

[00:19:30] but you've got a healthy introverted side

[00:19:32] which means that you're comfortable up in your office sometimes

[00:19:35] not that the door closed

[00:19:37] but people have to climb up steps to get to you

[00:19:39] and that step ladder they have to go up in the trapdoor

[00:19:41] and all those types of things they have to get through.

[00:19:43] It's our employee wellness program.

[00:19:46] So a lot of people don't

[00:19:48] but you send out that message I'm up here working

[00:19:50] it's my world and you're probably more accomplished

[00:19:52] because of that.

[00:19:53] Extroverted people are not

[00:19:55] they're excessively responsive

[00:19:58] and reactive to people

[00:20:00] and therefore sometimes feeling less accomplished

[00:20:03] at getting done what needed to get done.

[00:20:05] And they call themselves procrastinators

[00:20:08] or I'm sure I'll work under pressure

[00:20:10] I'll get it done tomorrow night

[00:20:12] whatever excuse is.

[00:20:14] Sometimes the nature of the person begs these things to happen

[00:20:16] or not happen.

[00:20:17] So it's not even really that

[00:20:19] the word procrastinating means that they're intentionally

[00:20:21] pushing something off because they didn't want to do it.

[00:20:23] Really what it is is they are allowing

[00:20:25] responsiveness and

[00:20:27] socialization with employees

[00:20:29] and dialoguing and maybe brainstorming

[00:20:31] to get in the way of

[00:20:33] these are things I really needed to get done today.

[00:20:35] So it's not even procrastination it's just other things

[00:20:37] have now taken over the time.

[00:20:39] Reordering your priorities.

[00:20:40] Exactly pushing everything back a little bit.

[00:20:42] Make you feel better about being a procrastinator doesn't it?

[00:20:44] A little bit.

[00:20:45] There are other reasons why people

[00:20:48] have tough days.

[00:20:50] Sometimes they're just at a personal low point.

[00:20:53] Physically, emotionally drained

[00:20:55] maybe it's been through a rough time

[00:20:57] and they're just not with it

[00:20:59] so therefore when you're not with it

[00:21:01] you're not really interested in doing a lot.

[00:21:03] Sure.

[00:21:04] And you get at the end of the day

[00:21:05] and you beat yourself even more like

[00:21:06] God come on I'll let that out

[00:21:08] I should have done something.

[00:21:09] So we beat ourselves up.

[00:21:11] There's aggravation after aggravation

[00:21:13] things happen during the day that are not

[00:21:15] maybe on our control but they're still aggravating.

[00:21:17] They siphon our time, our energy

[00:21:19] sometimes we heard a person

[00:21:21] as a leader that say the other days

[00:21:23] I'm sitting there thinking

[00:21:25] as I listened to that employee of mine

[00:21:27] thinking why in the world are they being

[00:21:29] such a Mickey Mouse thing to listen to?

[00:21:31] Just take care of it.

[00:21:33] But they couldn't say that to the person

[00:21:35] because they're a good leader.

[00:21:36] But at the same time they're thinking that

[00:21:38] so it's aggravation after aggravation after aggravation

[00:21:40] you get to the other day and you say

[00:21:41] oh my God what a tiring day.

[00:21:43] Well and especially just from our

[00:21:45] employee survey work and we survey leaders

[00:21:47] and healthcare organizations a lot too

[00:21:49] to find out what may be going on in their day

[00:21:51] that's causing their engagement or satisfaction

[00:21:53] to grow up or down.

[00:21:54] Related to that, processes,

[00:21:56] systems some of them is the red tape

[00:21:58] sometimes retraining on new software

[00:22:01] those are the things that are the aggravations

[00:22:03] as well when you kind of get to the end of the day

[00:22:05] and say man nothing just really went right today

[00:22:07] because of all these other factors

[00:22:09] but it directly impacted me

[00:22:11] in my leadership role.

[00:22:12] And you hit on one in the passing there

[00:22:14] politics in the organization

[00:22:16] that drains a leader.

[00:22:17] And really that's after I'll constantly be looking over your shoulder

[00:22:20] listening to what's not being said

[00:22:22] by a superior person

[00:22:24] wondering who to go to with the net

[00:22:26] did I cover my bases and all sorts of stuff

[00:22:28] that's emotionally draining

[00:22:29] and sometimes that just wears down a person

[00:22:31] and when that's so obvious during the day

[00:22:33] you almost feel like oh God

[00:22:35] why live in this type of environment

[00:22:38] so it makes it a bad trashy day for a person.

[00:22:40] Well even extending a little bit beyond

[00:22:42] the political side sometimes it's just

[00:22:44] you've got coworkers you've got other leaders that

[00:22:46] are they're having a tough situation

[00:22:49] they're ranting they're kind of unloading on somebody

[00:22:52] they need an open voice

[00:22:54] and it's hard not to let those things affect you

[00:22:56] not only is it a distraction on time

[00:22:59] but it also leaves you with a more negative taste in your mouth

[00:23:02] on just what you're doing there

[00:23:04] in the organization and the role you're playing

[00:23:06] others can have that influence on you as well.

[00:23:08] That's true and if you allow yourself to be dragged down by those things

[00:23:11] you're being one of the cardinal principles of a good leader

[00:23:14] and that's to rise above it.

[00:23:16] Rise above the morass of the day.

[00:23:19] Another thing that causes bad days for people

[00:23:22] is just the multitude of personalities

[00:23:24] that we have to deal with during the day

[00:23:26] some of them are tough personalities

[00:23:28] and too much of that is just too much.

[00:23:30] Stress, excessive demands on time

[00:23:33] on time, talent and energy

[00:23:35] everybody's pulling that out

[00:23:37] that's those OPPs other people's priorities

[00:23:39] that we do sometimes

[00:23:41] and sure we have to do that

[00:23:43] but when that becomes constant day after day after day

[00:23:46] where we'll get through at the end of every day

[00:23:48] and saying gee whiz I just spent so much time on this

[00:23:51] and this and this I didn't get anything else done

[00:23:54] and it replaces what we're supposed to get done

[00:23:56] that's when we feel that was a trashy day.

[00:23:59] And you know the funny thing is

[00:24:00] there's so many of these things you're mentioning Dad

[00:24:02] and we've actually had episodes of this show

[00:24:04] where we've talked about leaders doing the things

[00:24:06] that we're saying are actually burning us out now

[00:24:08] how responsive we're being as a leader.

[00:24:10] We want to be responsive, we want to be available

[00:24:12] we want to be accessible

[00:24:13] but we're also saying there is a downside to that

[00:24:15] sometimes too much of that can affect us

[00:24:18] and give us one of those trash days

[00:24:19] it's tough to dig out of.

[00:24:20] Well and you kind of I think you're reading my notes here Alan

[00:24:23] but you know that's the other thing

[00:24:24] that builds a bad trashy day for a person sometimes

[00:24:27] is that we try to live up to expectations

[00:24:31] that others have of us as leaders

[00:24:33] to remain calm in difficult situations

[00:24:36] to rise above it

[00:24:38] to kind of appear under control

[00:24:40] to manage our own emotional quotient if you would

[00:24:43] we're looked to as leaders to be the one

[00:24:46] that can rise above the morass

[00:24:48] and sometimes that's a lot to ask of ourselves

[00:24:50] to live up those expectations

[00:24:53] and we can't.

[00:24:54] Do you think it's safe to say Dad

[00:24:56] that I mean we hear about some random cases

[00:24:58] from time to time where somebody

[00:25:00] in a high level position in an organization

[00:25:03] you know either we find out later on

[00:25:04] that they've been having a problem with alcohol

[00:25:07] maybe some drugs maybe marital issues at home

[00:25:11] and you know sometimes it can kind of be insinuated

[00:25:14] that maybe the pressures of that leadership role

[00:25:16] and that high responsibility role

[00:25:18] then maybe trying to craft that perfect world

[00:25:20] when they're in that side of that office

[00:25:21] and when they get out of the office

[00:25:23] their life is just really kind of dark

[00:25:25] in a tough place to be

[00:25:26] you know you hear about those situations sometimes

[00:25:28] Absolutely I think that can be kind of an extreme

[00:25:30] of someone we're talking about

[00:25:32] remember my real focus right now is

[00:25:35] thinking tough days, trashy days, bad days

[00:25:38] whatever we want to call them stressful days

[00:25:40] how does a leader handle those

[00:25:42] and still lead effectively the next day

[00:25:45] so I don't think it's always possible

[00:25:47] to lead effectively through the trashy days

[00:25:50] but it's a good leadership trait

[00:25:52] to be able to rebound and come back

[00:25:54] and lead effectively the next day

[00:25:56] so that those trashy days don't define us

[00:25:59] as a leader.

[00:26:00] Well how about if we take a quick little break

[00:26:02] and we come back maybe let's talk about some of the ideas

[00:26:04] of what we can do to try to rebound

[00:26:06] from those trashy days.

[00:26:07] I think there are things that we need to do

[00:26:09] have to do some of them are trite

[00:26:11] I know for a lot of people and some of them are meaty

[00:26:13] so yeah let's get to that.

[00:26:14] Let's take a quick little break when we come back

[00:26:16] we're going to circle back on this conversation

[00:26:18] leaders and leading through the trash days

[00:26:20] and we just talked a lot about what those

[00:26:22] trash days are and what can lead to them

[00:26:24] let's talk next about what we can do to try to get through

[00:26:26] them and rebound from them for the next day

[00:26:28] so if you're listening to Leadership GPS

[00:26:30] with Alan and Tony Jackson we'll be back in just a moment.

[00:27:02] Welcome back to Leadership GPS here on TheMesh.TV

[00:27:06] we're talking about leading through the trash days

[00:27:09] Alan Jackson and Tony Jackson here discussing this

[00:27:12] we just spent a few minutes early on talking about

[00:27:14] what trash days were for a leader

[00:27:16] basically the tough days the aggravating days

[00:27:19] the days that really sometimes make us question

[00:27:21] our role as a leader.

[00:27:22] We're going to talk next about what to do

[00:27:24] and making it through those days

[00:27:26] or at least rebounding for the next day when we come back

[00:27:29] but before I do just another thank you

[00:27:31] and mention about the Greater Hickory Kea Classic

[00:27:34] Golf Tournament thanks again for your support

[00:27:36] of TheMesh.TV

[00:27:37] remember that tournament is coming up October 13th

[00:27:40] through the 19th 2014

[00:27:42] you can learn more about the tournament

[00:27:44] and get tickets at greaterhickorykeaclassic.com

[00:27:49] Alright so dad we talked about the trash days

[00:27:51] I think we left on a good question mark there

[00:27:54] what can we do to rebound

[00:27:56] it may not be getting through the day necessarily

[00:27:58] but how can we get back in the swing of things

[00:28:00] and make sure these days don't drag us down

[00:28:02] well I think part of the getting back

[00:28:04] the next day as an effective leader

[00:28:06] is making it through the trash day

[00:28:08] so how do we tolerate that trash day

[00:28:10] without doing irreparable damage to us as a leader

[00:28:13] let's talk about that

[00:28:15] first of all we've already mentioned this

[00:28:17] I think the first rule of thumb is you have to accept

[00:28:19] the fact that there are going to be tough days

[00:28:21] that's what we bought into as a leader

[00:28:24] nobody said it would be a bed of roses

[00:28:26] you know and when you're focused on being responsive

[00:28:29] and you're being influential

[00:28:31] you're kind of entrusting most of yourself to other people

[00:28:34] you know, at least it's always about the other person

[00:28:36] so anytime you do that

[00:28:38] you lose some control

[00:28:40] and that can lead to tough days

[00:28:42] and you know it's

[00:28:44] and I'm not being condescending to any roles out there at all

[00:28:47] but there are a lot of people in our world

[00:28:49] I mean a vast majority of them I think that

[00:28:51] don't want to be in a leadership role

[00:28:53] they're happy not being in a leadership role

[00:28:55] they've chosen a role that

[00:28:57] doesn't have this layer of responsibility

[00:28:59] accountability and people looking to you to do

[00:29:02] you know that's the path they chose

[00:29:04] we as leaders we chose it

[00:29:06] we consciously said we wanted to have a level of responsibility

[00:29:09] we wanted to have that level of accountability

[00:29:11] invisibility that we wouldn't have

[00:29:13] if we were just working at an hourly job

[00:29:15] or assembly line or something else

[00:29:17] where it was just a routine task

[00:29:19] so it's something we have chosen

[00:29:21] and I think that's what we're talking about that

[00:29:23] this is, if anybody told you a leadership role

[00:29:25] was never going to have any bad days

[00:29:27] they were lying to you pretty aggressively

[00:29:29] well now I'm going to have to put part of that

[00:29:31] and this is another soapbox of mine as you know

[00:29:33] and I'm spending a lot of time it's something for another day

[00:29:35] but the organizations that leaders

[00:29:37] work for and with

[00:29:39] are partly to blame

[00:29:41] for

[00:29:43] leaders being ineffective

[00:29:45] in their jobs

[00:29:47] because they sometimes will promote

[00:29:49] people into manager roles

[00:29:51] and then much too late

[00:29:53] after they're there

[00:29:55] expect them to act leader like

[00:29:57] now the other thing is sometimes we induce

[00:29:59] we entice them with the wrong things

[00:30:01] you get straight hours

[00:30:03] rather than shift work

[00:30:05] and you got a little bit more control over your time

[00:30:07] and some more money there

[00:30:09] don't you want this management position

[00:30:11] it's just the wrong things that can happen

[00:30:13] sometimes like this

[00:30:15] when it's being pitched like that it's hard to say no

[00:30:17] more pay

[00:30:19] stricter hours, normal hours

[00:30:21] but the truth of the matter is they very rarely

[00:30:23] will come out and say as they should

[00:30:25] you know what this is going to be a higher level

[00:30:27] responsibility you're going to have some really tough days

[00:30:29] there are going to be times you're going to question it

[00:30:31] but we know you can do this

[00:30:33] and unfortunately that's not the problem

[00:30:35] I also need to be honest and I'm saying when we're really hiring you for

[00:30:37] is a leadership role not just a management role

[00:30:39] about leadership here we mean

[00:30:41] this, this and this

[00:30:43] that's true being much more intentional about that

[00:30:45] again another topic for another day

[00:30:47] but that's certainly there

[00:30:49] second thing we need to do other than accepting the fact

[00:30:51] that the life of a leader is going

[00:30:53] to be filled sometimes with bad days

[00:30:55] or tough days

[00:30:57] or tough parts of the days

[00:30:59] second thing is to learn to be gentle with ourselves

[00:31:01] you know and treat ourselves pretty good

[00:31:03] by that I mean we got to do the basics

[00:31:05] we got to eat well, we got enough sleep

[00:31:07] we got to exercise because

[00:31:09] if we're not

[00:31:11] on our game

[00:31:13] we're going to have a great day

[00:31:15] all the time

[00:31:17] in addition to that though

[00:31:19] I think that a lot of times

[00:31:21] again like being our own worst enemy

[00:31:23] as a leader

[00:31:25] we need to learn to take a sniper approach

[00:31:27] rather than an atomic bomb approach

[00:31:29] to what we do during the day

[00:31:31] you know what that means?

[00:31:33] explain that

[00:31:35] the sniper approach is very focused

[00:31:37] very precise

[00:31:39] I'm going to make this happen

[00:31:41] and out of your list Allen that you have

[00:31:43] 13, 15 to 23

[00:31:45] 38 things to do today

[00:31:47] let's page one, yep

[00:31:49] then pick out the three things that you know for sure

[00:31:51] you will make happen that day

[00:31:53] now if you get 12 others done, wonderful

[00:31:55] good for you, but

[00:31:57] the three that make the big impact

[00:31:59] are the three that you're going to work on

[00:32:01] so that's a sniper approach

[00:32:03] rather than atomic bomb I'm going to cover everything

[00:32:05] so I'm going to make this company

[00:32:07] perfect this company by the end of the day today

[00:32:09] it's even like god I'm going to get so much done today

[00:32:11] I'm going to list 18 things here done to down

[00:32:13] now I can

[00:32:15] and then all of a sudden somebody knocks at the door

[00:32:17] or somebody calls or a problem comes up

[00:32:19] you didn't expect all this other stuff

[00:32:21] that we've been talking about

[00:32:23] so be gentle and simply saying if nothing else

[00:32:25] these three will get done

[00:32:27] picking out that one, two, three items

[00:32:29] that's my focus I have to get those done

[00:32:31] and I will get those done

[00:32:33] you can walk away at the end of the day even if you got nothing else accomplished

[00:32:35] you can walk away saying those were the

[00:32:37] two things I need to do today and I got them done

[00:32:39] and you feel accomplished that's good

[00:32:41] and that's partly being gentle

[00:32:43] allow yourself like that

[00:32:45] making some success points that are

[00:32:47] truly achievable rather than something that's not

[00:32:49] okay that's not saying you're not trying to do these other things

[00:32:51] but if we don't get them done

[00:32:53] okay fine, we've got some others done

[00:32:55] that's really just an internal prioritization

[00:32:57] it's understanding that these 25 things on our list

[00:32:59] not all 25 are critical to be done today

[00:33:01] 22 of them could easily be pushed off

[00:33:03] to a week to a month

[00:33:05] two weeks, three weeks later and be fine

[00:33:07] it's not going to impact anything

[00:33:09] so it's being more fair to our self on what's reasonable

[00:33:11] and needed to be done in a day

[00:33:13] that's exactly right

[00:33:15] there's a quote already and I can't tell you who it came from

[00:33:17] but I really like it

[00:33:19] because I think that's what's wrong with me today

[00:33:21] am I 4 out of a scale of 10

[00:33:23] moved today

[00:33:25] which is getting better by the way, it's up to 6.8 now

[00:33:27] oh good, awesome

[00:33:29] our job by the end of the show

[00:33:31] I'm setting a realistic expectation

[00:33:33] maybe we're going to go for 8.2

[00:33:35] does that work for you?

[00:33:37] if we shoot over 8.2, we can feel very accomplished

[00:33:39] yeah great

[00:33:41] well you know me Alan, I'm a warrior

[00:33:43] you know that

[00:33:45] I don't know that at all

[00:33:47] it's a worry of the day type of thing

[00:33:49] but I read a quote the other week

[00:33:51] and it really made a lot of sense

[00:33:53] I wish I could find out who it was

[00:33:55] he said, I've spent a lifetime worrying about things

[00:33:57] that never happened

[00:33:59] yep

[00:34:01] again being gentle with yourself

[00:34:03] about choose what you worry about

[00:34:05] choose what's the

[00:34:07] mountain rather than the mohills

[00:34:09] I'm just tying a personal story into this

[00:34:11] oh jeez

[00:34:13] I'm not going to talk about you

[00:34:15] I'm going to talk about somebody else I'm very close to

[00:34:17] who will remain nameless because I do want to be able to

[00:34:19] enjoy my life at home

[00:34:21] for the next few days

[00:34:23] but certain people I know

[00:34:25] can craft

[00:34:27] a very elaborate chain of events

[00:34:29] in their head of what's going to happen

[00:34:31] based off of one thing

[00:34:33] well if this happens then this is going to happen

[00:34:35] and if this happens that means this is going to happen

[00:34:37] and then this could happen

[00:34:39] all of a sudden they're depressed and down about something

[00:34:41] that's four or five steps down the road

[00:34:43] where you don't even know if that first step is even going to happen

[00:34:45] and it's

[00:34:47] I've found myself doing it sometimes

[00:34:49] and it's

[00:34:51] trying to spot when that's happening

[00:34:53] and realizing back up just focus on that first thing

[00:34:55] don't worry about the 20 other steps

[00:34:57] that could happen

[00:34:59] what's in front of you

[00:35:01] I thought it was a great quote

[00:35:03] it's really good did you do it

[00:35:05] no I didn't

[00:35:07] I would love to take credit but I'm sure somebody is out there

[00:35:09] saying he didn't write that

[00:35:11] I've written some but this is not one of them

[00:35:13] I've spent a lifetime worrying about things that never happened

[00:35:15] that's exactly right

[00:35:17] third thing that a leader

[00:35:19] can do to work through the tough days

[00:35:21] and be effective the next day

[00:35:23] as a leader

[00:35:25] understand what we or others may be doing

[00:35:27] that has made that a bad day

[00:35:29] sometimes bad days just don't occur

[00:35:31] luck of the draw

[00:35:33] sometimes it's a direct reflection

[00:35:35] of how we're spending our time

[00:35:37] and how we do what we do

[00:35:39] again two quotes

[00:35:41] for example

[00:35:43] one quote I've loved for years

[00:35:45] if you are already in a hole

[00:35:47] don't keep digging

[00:35:49] very similar to what the old joke was

[00:35:51] that guy went through a lot of things

[00:35:53] and his advice was don't hold it up like this

[00:35:55] in other words stop doing what you're doing

[00:35:57] it's causing thanks

[00:35:59] so do you recommend those situations

[00:36:01] let's say you have one of those trash days

[00:36:03] you get home at the end of a long day

[00:36:05] maybe fix a glass of wine

[00:36:07] is it a matter of thinking back through

[00:36:09] think back through the day

[00:36:11] and try to analyze what it was

[00:36:13] that threw the day off

[00:36:15] that's part of it

[00:36:17] you have to do that

[00:36:19] you have to do that

[00:36:21] in order to understand what caused a bad day

[00:36:23] sometimes it's what we do

[00:36:25] and how we typically do it

[00:36:27] I'll give you an example

[00:36:29] and you're the example

[00:36:31] you create some of your own stress

[00:36:33] during certain days

[00:36:35] here at the office

[00:36:37] because you will

[00:36:39] say

[00:36:41] I'll be back from that meeting with the chamber

[00:36:43] at 1.15

[00:36:45] so we'll set the meeting

[00:36:47] I'll set it for 1.15 or 1.30

[00:36:49] and you won't be

[00:36:51] you don't have control over that

[00:36:53] it's better for you to simply say

[00:36:55] if you think you might be back by 1.15

[00:36:57] you really simply think I want to be back

[00:36:59] to 1.30 so I'm going to set it for 1.45

[00:37:01] the meeting

[00:37:03] the fact of the matter is

[00:37:05] I've actually tried to be doing that

[00:37:07] unfortunately my time estimates are so far off

[00:37:09] that even my extended

[00:37:11] 15-20-30 minutes

[00:37:13] I try to give myself still doesn't work out

[00:37:15] you're beyond hopes

[00:37:17] probably not making any sense

[00:37:19] but it is also funny that this is a little

[00:37:21] contradictory to what some people will say

[00:37:23] for a leader

[00:37:25] where some leaders will say that

[00:37:27] if I schedule an hour meeting

[00:37:29] but I'm trying to be very conscious of my time

[00:37:31] I'm actually going to make it a 45 minute meeting

[00:37:33] and it has to be done by 45 minutes

[00:37:35] I can go on to my next thing

[00:37:37] I think there's mayhem

[00:37:39] in between those two poles

[00:37:41] you could either schedule yourself too tightly

[00:37:43] yes, yes you could

[00:37:45] you may schedule yourself too broadly

[00:37:47] and I think sometimes the tendency is

[00:37:49] if you have an hour and a half meeting

[00:37:51] you feel like you've got to fill an hour and a half meeting

[00:37:53] even if you only have 30 minutes of stuff to do

[00:37:55] that's another one of those things

[00:37:57] I think they're the same thing

[00:37:59] because another trait of some people

[00:38:01] is what I call the hourly syndrome

[00:38:03] think about how much of our life

[00:38:05] and how much of our meetings

[00:38:07] and how much of our times and events are based on

[00:38:09] hour increments

[00:38:11] or half hour increments

[00:38:13] and we get that because of TV shows

[00:38:15] tell me about

[00:38:17] ever

[00:38:19] scheduling to watch a 48 minute TV program

[00:38:21] it's done

[00:38:23] religiously

[00:38:25] so our lives are structured that sort of way

[00:38:27] you have somebody in an elite ship role

[00:38:29] said how long do your staff meetings usually last

[00:38:31] an hour?

[00:38:33] well, that's the way we do it

[00:38:35] that's kind of the time you do it

[00:38:37] and seeing I think that's where that problem is

[00:38:39] sometimes you have that hour meeting

[00:38:41] you feel that's need that if you get done

[00:38:43] at 30 minutes you did something wrong

[00:38:45] like with the meeting which that's not the case

[00:38:47] no, you should celebrate and say

[00:38:49] guess what guys we're finished it

[00:38:51] good for us

[00:38:53] but also remember

[00:38:55] in this next point related to this

[00:38:57] sometimes people are one of the worst enemies

[00:38:59] because they were back to back meetings

[00:39:01] moment to moment

[00:39:03] I've got a meeting from 10 to 11

[00:39:05] so I can meet with you at 11

[00:39:07] no you can't

[00:39:09] you can't meet with me at 11 or

[00:39:11] you get into something else

[00:39:13] or you need to talk one-to-one with somebody

[00:39:15] within that meeting

[00:39:17] so you're apologizing for being late to your next meeting

[00:39:19] or

[00:39:21] let's say you have to go 15 minutes down the hallway

[00:39:23] to get there

[00:39:25] or let's say you do get done at 11

[00:39:27] and you can walk next door to the meeting

[00:39:29] at 11 o'clock

[00:39:31] you don't have any detox time

[00:39:33] in between those meetings at all

[00:39:35] you're basically jumping from one topic

[00:39:37] and just exhale

[00:39:39] and just slump down in a couch

[00:39:41] and say where did my day go

[00:39:43] well you scheduled your day

[00:39:45] they scheduled their day and they did it

[00:39:47] inappropriately

[00:39:49] so your comment about how we got this

[00:39:51] from TV shows

[00:39:53] here's my cultural experiment

[00:39:55] we're going to keep a watch out over the next 30 years

[00:39:57] because

[00:39:59] obviously with TVs changing

[00:40:01] we're no longer on this 30 minute block

[00:40:03] where we have to tune into a TV show at a certain time

[00:40:05] and at last 30 minutes with commercials

[00:40:07] we watch shows on Netflix that are

[00:40:09] sometimes 38 minutes, sometimes 42 minutes

[00:40:11] I'm curious just hypothetically

[00:40:13] if in the future

[00:40:15] future workers and employees are going to see

[00:40:17] their work schedule be a lot more fluid

[00:40:19] and not feeling like everything has to be falling

[00:40:21] in these hourly half hour blocks

[00:40:23] I'd just be curious

[00:40:25] yeah it is

[00:40:27] well if you're listening to this show in 2030

[00:40:29] and you happen to download this episode

[00:40:31] drop us a note and let us know what things look like

[00:40:33] for you these days we'd like to see if our hypothesis is true

[00:40:35] that's right

[00:40:37] okay I'm sorry to get us off track there

[00:40:39] the other thing we do to ourselves sometimes is be too rigid

[00:40:41] I know my wife is on a

[00:40:43] board of a university and

[00:40:45] one person that she has to sit in a meeting through

[00:40:47] as a leader that meeting is so

[00:40:49] regimented about

[00:40:51] no meeting will last more than an hour

[00:40:53] there again in regards of how much has to be accomplished

[00:40:55] which I think is foolish

[00:40:57] first of all we need to let agendas

[00:40:59] determine the timeframe of what we need to get done

[00:41:01] and how we process decisions

[00:41:03] right not the clock

[00:41:05] and it's so aggravating sometimes

[00:41:07] for people to simply say

[00:41:09] okay we got to get finished

[00:41:11] and the opportunity for discussing what we're talking about

[00:41:13] goes by the wayside

[00:41:15] because everybody knows the main objective for that meeting

[00:41:17] is not information exchange

[00:41:19] and information transfer

[00:41:21] it is the clock

[00:41:23] and get finished by one o'clock

[00:41:25] that's true

[00:41:27] so how do you argue

[00:41:29] with this so

[00:41:31] what would be the argument for how

[00:41:33] keeping a meeting

[00:41:35] to a certain timetable

[00:41:37] can actually cause you

[00:41:39] more of that trash day

[00:41:41] later on in the day

[00:41:43] it can because you're going to leave knowing

[00:41:45] that you haven't accomplished what you want to accomplish

[00:41:47] and leaving a group that's probably

[00:41:49] feeling the same way very frustrated

[00:41:51] with your regimentation of the meeting

[00:41:53] and I guarantee those are the meetings too

[00:41:55] where people are probably going to talk

[00:41:57] later on that day and the hallway

[00:41:59] or afterwards or after hours

[00:42:01] debriefing and talking about what all went wrong

[00:42:03] in that meeting and all the things that are still undecided

[00:42:05] so now that's actually more work

[00:42:07] that's been piled onto the people in that meeting

[00:42:09] that could have been accomplished if everybody stuck around

[00:42:11] and let the meeting breathe

[00:42:13] one more quote

[00:42:15] that ties into this thing about being our own worst enemies

[00:42:17] understand what we might be doing

[00:42:19] that causes our bad day or trash day

[00:42:21] the great philosopher Jimmy Buffett

[00:42:23] once said in one of his songs

[00:42:25] breathe in, breathe out

[00:42:27] move on

[00:42:29] it's got to put things perspective

[00:42:31] not everything is a major issue

[00:42:33] take a breath, re-gather yourself

[00:42:35] talking between meetings and then get on with it

[00:42:37] sure

[00:42:39] if you start bringing over that frustration

[00:42:41] and let it get into your next meeting

[00:42:43] or your next task

[00:42:45] you're just really infecting the whole rest of your day

[00:42:47] I think at the end of the day

[00:42:49] if the end of a bad day

[00:42:51] or trashy day

[00:42:53] you're just trying to get the best effort

[00:42:55] to reflect a little bit

[00:42:57] maybe it's this or that glass of wine on the deck

[00:42:59] or maybe it's just driving home

[00:43:01] or maybe it's just sitting at your desk when everything has

[00:43:03] settled down

[00:43:05] and you categorize the day

[00:43:07] and say how was this day

[00:43:09] on a scale of 10

[00:43:11] and if it was 6 or less

[00:43:13] you ask a question why

[00:43:15] why was it that way

[00:43:17] and try to identify a couple things that didn't work out well

[00:43:19] or what ate into your day that was unexpected

[00:43:21] not that you can go back and relive them

[00:43:23] but you're becoming analytical

[00:43:25] about the reasons why it was a bad day

[00:43:27] being analytical helps you avoid them the next time around

[00:43:29] if you have that choice

[00:43:31] but don't forget the other side

[00:43:33] if it was a great day or a good day

[00:43:35] 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

[00:43:37] 10 plus 12 on a scale of 10

[00:43:39] also allows that and say what made it a great day

[00:43:41] I asked Lisa a lot of time

[00:43:43] when they say how was your day

[00:43:45] was it good or good what made it that way

[00:43:47] well, then they hadn't really thought about it

[00:43:49] they just had a good feel about it

[00:43:51] usually is I got through the day without major issues

[00:43:53] I got things accomplished

[00:43:55] I scratched things off my list

[00:43:57] all the things we've been talking about

[00:43:59] but understand what makes a day

[00:44:01] good or bad for you

[00:44:03] and you see that's in reflection

[00:44:05] after the fact of having one of those types of days

[00:44:07] good, I like that

[00:44:09] the other thing I don't want to miss opportunity to say

[00:44:11] is sometimes there are bad days

[00:44:13] where just these bad days

[00:44:15] all the way through their trashy days

[00:44:17] there's nothing good about them

[00:44:19] so we can't sit down and pick out one or two things

[00:44:21] that did happen well

[00:44:23] even on a trashy day which I always recommend people do

[00:44:25] usually there's something that

[00:44:27] happened good

[00:44:29] it was well done that we feel accomplished with

[00:44:31] despite all this other morass of

[00:44:33] being a bad day

[00:44:35] I know we can pluck out a couple of those things

[00:44:37] once in a while though

[00:44:39] we just have to write the fact that

[00:44:41] you know

[00:44:43] that was a day that doesn't need to be repeated

[00:44:45] let's not reference it again

[00:44:47] let's just move on

[00:44:49] and when you find that what I advise people to do

[00:44:51] is take a clean sheet of paper

[00:44:53] you write the day and the date

[00:44:55] on a piece of paper in big old letters

[00:44:57] and then you do nothing but

[00:44:59] wipe it up and do a high arcing

[00:45:01] shot to the trash can and say it's over

[00:45:03] get over it

[00:45:05] get on to more tomorrow

[00:45:07] sometimes there are days like that

[00:45:09] now remember

[00:45:11] patch us out on the back when you do find

[00:45:13] the cheerleaders from time to time

[00:45:15] let's talk about what you can do during the bad day

[00:45:17] itself, not after the fact and not before

[00:45:19] so you're in the midst of a really bad day here

[00:45:21] a lot of these are platitudes so get ready for that

[00:45:23] sure

[00:45:25] some people love this other people

[00:45:27] ain't so whatever

[00:45:29] but we have to learn to be able to separate

[00:45:31] from an analytical standpoint what are

[00:45:33] problems and what are conditions

[00:45:35] problems have solutions it's a worthy

[00:45:37] of our time and attention because that's what

[00:45:39] we're there to do solve problems a lot of times

[00:45:41] conditions we can't change

[00:45:43] I can't do anything about the fact

[00:45:45] if it's storming outside or if it's cold

[00:45:47] and you know whatever but

[00:45:49] I can do something about how I use my time

[00:45:51] during that day or if I'm

[00:45:53] presented with a problem that may be

[00:45:55] able to be solved right then I can do that

[00:45:57] problems have solutions, conditions

[00:45:59] we have to accept, live through

[00:46:01] live around or just tolerate

[00:46:03] their fact of life but it's amazing

[00:46:05] how many times people get

[00:46:07] absolutely frustrated and aggravated

[00:46:09] and

[00:46:11] been out of shape

[00:46:13] and their day is bad because of conditions

[00:46:15] that can't change

[00:46:17] they can't do anything about it

[00:46:19] it's almost like saying to the person you know

[00:46:21] that says I don't like what I do

[00:46:23] and the only solution

[00:46:25] is either if you don't love what you do

[00:46:27] either change what you love

[00:46:29] or change what you do

[00:46:31] if you're living in a world of conditions

[00:46:33] that you can't accept and tolerate

[00:46:35] that's the nature of that world and that job

[00:46:37] can change for your efforts

[00:46:39] change jobs, change the day

[00:46:41] it's like going to New York City

[00:46:43] and touring Times Square

[00:46:45] and getting frustrated and angry that it's crowded

[00:46:47] you know I mean it's like there's nothing you can do about it

[00:46:49] so either don't put yourself in that situation

[00:46:51] where you're going to get frustrated in the future

[00:46:53] or you know or get past it

[00:46:55] that's exactly right

[00:46:57] okay, that's during the day a couple things

[00:46:59] so know the difference between conditions

[00:47:01] and problems

[00:47:03] self talk, I'm a big fan of self talk

[00:47:05] that's where you really talk to yourself

[00:47:07] is that what you do when I pass you in the hallway

[00:47:09] and you seem to be talking to somebody

[00:47:11] I thought you were on a bluetooth phone

[00:47:13] no, that's more dimension

[00:47:15] you know how I am in life

[00:47:17] I'm just getting those

[00:47:19] spots every now and then

[00:47:21] self talk

[00:47:23] once in a while it's worth your effort

[00:47:25] to look back at yourself and say

[00:47:27] don't go on what I can handle this

[00:47:29] I can make this work out

[00:47:31] or I did accomplish that

[00:47:33] I don't beat myself up, you know

[00:47:35] find a value in yourself

[00:47:37] tell yourself about it

[00:47:39] remind yourself that you're a good person

[00:47:41] or that you've got things in control

[00:47:43] or that dog on it, I face it before

[00:47:45] I handle it then, I'll handle it this time

[00:47:47] do you remember, I don't know if you recall

[00:47:49] the Saturday night lives get the Stuart Smalley

[00:47:51] you remember him looking in the mirror

[00:47:53] and the dog on it, I'm good enough

[00:47:55] I'm smart enough

[00:47:57] he's like no, I'm good enough

[00:47:59] I'm smart enough and dog on it people like me

[00:48:01] I'm as happy as that sounds

[00:48:03] there's some value to it once in a while

[00:48:05] remind ourselves that we do bring something to the table

[00:48:07] another thing during the day

[00:48:09] is call on your support people

[00:48:11] everybody in an organization

[00:48:13] with multiple people has a support person

[00:48:15] whether they know it or not

[00:48:17] it's a person you can let your hair down with

[00:48:19] but here's what you've got to be careful of

[00:48:21] if you're having a trashy day

[00:48:23] and you go to a support person

[00:48:25] don't dump on them, don't spill on them

[00:48:27] don't contaminate them

[00:48:29] just ventilate

[00:48:31] sometimes it's a matter of saying to the person

[00:48:33] can I just sit here a few minutes with you

[00:48:35] or I need to be around somebody sane today

[00:48:37] you might as well just plop down here a few minutes

[00:48:39] and we talk about some, not even work related

[00:48:41] that's what support people can do for you

[00:48:43] they're tolerant people

[00:48:45] take you for where you are without judging it

[00:48:47] I do think that's really

[00:48:49] something again going back to the surveys

[00:48:51] we see, we see a lot of leadership teams

[00:48:53] where leaders are saying they don't feel like

[00:48:55] they have others in their organization

[00:48:57] they can go to

[00:48:59] for support

[00:49:01] and I think that's a lot of that

[00:49:03] they're not talking about going to their leader or their boss

[00:49:05] it's really somebody around them

[00:49:07] that they can then walk in the office and say

[00:49:09] can I bounce something off of you

[00:49:11] or even just sit here and let me detox

[00:49:13] for a moment or something

[00:49:15] and I think that's important

[00:49:17] I think a leadership team structure needs to have

[00:49:19] an environment where you can have that other person

[00:49:21] inside the organization

[00:49:23] or out needs to be able to have that kind of

[00:49:25] openness to do that

[00:49:27] there is a difference between ventilating about

[00:49:29] what's frustrating at the moment

[00:49:31] and spilling that over to that other person

[00:49:33] rather than somebody going in and saying can I just

[00:49:35] decompress for a little bit

[00:49:37] I need to get out of my immediate situation

[00:49:39] and share it here for a minute

[00:49:41] how's your family doing

[00:49:43] let me just get my mind

[00:49:45] off of whatever was digging me in a whole

[00:49:47] a minute ago, let's get out of it a bit

[00:49:49] hopefully we'll be sensitive to where the other person is

[00:49:51] so not staying in their office for three hours

[00:49:53] and just chatting about my family or anything

[00:49:55] so no, okay

[00:49:57] that's right, I knew that

[00:50:01] I hear you, I won't be in your office tomorrow then

[00:50:03] oh no, no, yours are normally

[00:50:05] three or four minutes

[00:50:07] you're talking about mom then

[00:50:09] I'm not talking about anybody

[00:50:11] let me just go on the record, nobody is being referenced

[00:50:13] in this podcast

[00:50:15] one thing I tell people in healthcare

[00:50:17] environments that I work with and that's where a lot of my work time is spent

[00:50:19] you know, if you're having a trashy day

[00:50:21] as a leader

[00:50:23] and need to just get out of that

[00:50:25] trashiness for the moment

[00:50:27] go focus on somebody else, visit a patient

[00:50:29] oh well, okay

[00:50:31] that's the object we're over there anyway in healthcare

[00:50:33] go focus on a patient

[00:50:35] visit and spend a little bit of time with a patient's family

[00:50:37] and remember there's five minutes, we'll do it

[00:50:39] but what it really does is refocus you

[00:50:41] that's a good point

[00:50:43] what it was my role to really hear about is not about that patient

[00:50:45] type of thing, focus on that person

[00:50:47] you're really good in a healthcare environment because you do have people down the hall

[00:50:50] typically that are there that you're caring for

[00:50:52] what about outside of healthcare?

[00:50:54] outside of healthcare is just the same type of thing

[00:50:56] and leaders role is to help other people be successful

[00:50:59] so what you do is go to the one people that report to you even

[00:51:02] and not talk about work, just simply say

[00:51:04] you got a few minutes to bring me up to date

[00:51:06] no matter what's going on in your life

[00:51:08] how's your family doing?

[00:51:10] you had a son go to NC State didn't you

[00:51:12] well bad choice on his party, he got to go to Carolina

[00:51:14] and talk about those types of things

[00:51:16] what that does is a multitude of good things for the leader

[00:51:19] it focuses on the people

[00:51:21] that you're responsible for influencing and leading

[00:51:24] secondly it treats them as people first

[00:51:26] as employees second because you're focused on their life

[00:51:29] and who they are

[00:51:31] and the third thing is debriefing you from your trashy situation

[00:51:35] so you're really talking about a little bit

[00:51:37] distancing yourself, getting yourself out of whatever

[00:51:40] that spiral you're in during that day

[00:51:42] find a way to set yourself out for a little bit

[00:51:44] get refocused then you might be able to tip toe back in

[00:51:47] and see if you can start to pull it out of the tailspin there

[00:51:50] so you know it's always scenario that people say

[00:51:53] sleep on over night, count to ten

[00:51:55] all they're talking about is get away from things

[00:51:58] for a few moments and this is a physical way of doing that

[00:52:01] I can't think of a single time when

[00:52:04] I was in a down mood or had a bad day or whatever

[00:52:07] and that night I've done decompression stuff

[00:52:10] and all that but that overnight sleep

[00:52:13] the next day is pretty nice compared to the night before

[00:52:16] type of thing, you know?

[00:52:18] so that getting away no matter what it is

[00:52:20] physically anything else happens to them

[00:52:22] I think you ought to look for humor in situations

[00:52:24] in a workplace, there's humor in almost every situation

[00:52:27] you and I found humor in a funeral one time

[00:52:29] of your grandfather, remember that?

[00:52:31] I won't say it was a riot, you know that type of thing

[00:52:34] No, but I know what you're talking about

[00:52:36] it was a light situation

[00:52:39] obviously surrounded by a sad time

[00:52:42] but it did help the situation I think

[00:52:44] for all accounts

[00:52:46] and we know that your grandfather would have been

[00:52:48] just as young after he was there

[00:52:50] he would have loved it, absolutely

[00:52:52] even though his casket was almost turned over

[00:52:54] by the ministry he fell into it

[00:52:56] you mean the ministry when he finally showed up

[00:52:58] after we had to get up there

[00:53:00] yeah good times

[00:53:02] let me remind you a few things

[00:53:04] these are just platitudes

[00:53:06] but I thought we ought to close on that type of thing

[00:53:08] besides all that we've talked about

[00:53:10] remember

[00:53:12] besides the art of getting things done

[00:53:14] which we're always leaders focus on doing

[00:53:16] which causes a lot of our bad days

[00:53:18] there's also the noble art of leaving things undone

[00:53:20] knowing what not to do

[00:53:22] what not to spend time on

[00:53:24] we don't have to do everything

[00:53:26] but the wisdom of life

[00:53:28] it says the wisdom of life consists in the elimination

[00:53:30] of the non-essentials

[00:53:32] there's some truth to that

[00:53:34] I always advise people not about just delegating

[00:53:36] and all that but being self regimented

[00:53:38] by yourself anytime you're facing things

[00:53:40] to get done you need to ask yourself

[00:53:42] questions does this really have to be done

[00:53:44] does it have to be done today

[00:53:46] or right now? does it have to be done only by me

[00:53:48] and

[00:53:50] does it have to be done perfectly

[00:53:52] if the answer to any of those is no

[00:53:54] put it aside

[00:53:56] can I

[00:53:58] stem off of that just for a second

[00:54:00] and this is going to get a little more on the

[00:54:02] practical technology side of things

[00:54:04] but you know how long we're running on this table

[00:54:06] oh I know yeah we're doing okay time

[00:54:08] but a big hang up for me

[00:54:10] I think things that lend to my trash days

[00:54:12] is when I see things

[00:54:14] piling up whether it be

[00:54:16] stacks on a desk

[00:54:18] or inbox email messages

[00:54:20] and if you're already in a mood

[00:54:22] where something is not going right or you don't feel like you're getting accomplished

[00:54:24] seeing that stuff grow

[00:54:26] in front of you

[00:54:28] actually helps drive you further and further down

[00:54:30] now part of it is

[00:54:32] I spent one Saturday

[00:54:34] going through my inbox

[00:54:36] and just archiving anything that I thought

[00:54:38] you know what I'm never going to deal with that

[00:54:40] that's not important anymore

[00:54:42] let me get rid of it

[00:54:44] and cutting all that in half was really

[00:54:46] made you feel good at the end of the day

[00:54:48] I did feel very freeing

[00:54:50] I'm going to say on a very small technical note

[00:54:52] I've actually been experimenting there's a new email

[00:54:54] program I'm using

[00:54:56] it comes through your inbox

[00:54:58] you have an opportunity to say

[00:55:00] you can either respond to it forward just like you can

[00:55:02] or hit snooze buttons

[00:55:04] and the snooze button say do you want to be

[00:55:06] shown this email again later tonight

[00:55:08] tomorrow morning next week

[00:55:10] next month or put it into another filter

[00:55:12] all together

[00:55:14] so what it basically means is I read something

[00:55:16] I say okay you know what that's important

[00:55:18] but I don't need to do it today

[00:55:20] I can do it next week

[00:55:22] hit that snooze button it disappears from my inbox

[00:55:24] next week whenever I gave it that button

[00:55:26] a lot of these email programs are starting to come around

[00:55:28] and I know we're getting very nitpicky on it

[00:55:30] but to me that's actually been

[00:55:32] in the last week or so really nice

[00:55:34] to know that it helps me prioritize

[00:55:36] my time a little bit more

[00:55:38] and it's back to what you're just saying does this stuff really have to be done

[00:55:40] and all the messages we get in a day

[00:55:42] all the notices and memos

[00:55:44] probably less than 10% of them are things

[00:55:46] we actually have to deal with right away

[00:55:48] the rest of them can all be

[00:55:50] done something with later or delegated

[00:55:52] to decide and unfortunately we let ourselves

[00:55:54] build up and I think it stresses us out

[00:55:56] more than it needs to on a bad day

[00:55:58] that's a good point

[00:56:00] and I find I'm a person

[00:56:02] that I'm performance dependent

[00:56:04] as you are but you tend to

[00:56:06] create our feelings about ourselves sometimes

[00:56:08] and how successful we are with what we get done

[00:56:10] how many things we get done

[00:56:12] not always the weight

[00:56:14] of those things but how many things we get done

[00:56:16] scratching things off the list and all that

[00:56:18] sure and one of the things I like

[00:56:20] to get is closure on things

[00:56:22] I still like

[00:56:24] to mow the yard because you can see what you've accomplished

[00:56:26] some Saturdays I simply say

[00:56:28] my only objective today is to go through this stack

[00:56:30] of my desk and the home office

[00:56:32] and just clean it out and trash things

[00:56:34] it's a good feeling

[00:56:36] when I get frustrated and aggravated

[00:56:38] Margaret appreciates that about me sometimes

[00:56:40] because I keep the house clean

[00:56:42] when I get aggravated and stressed out

[00:56:44] I straighten up things around the house

[00:56:46] well part of that is I think what you were referring to

[00:56:48] a minute ago is that getting outside of something

[00:56:50] getting your mind refocused

[00:56:52] I think if you can get your brain focused on something else

[00:56:54] outside of what's bringing you down

[00:56:56] and give yourself some sense of accomplishment

[00:56:58] then you can get your brain back

[00:57:00] on track with what it is you are doing

[00:57:02] for your work

[00:57:04] couple thoughts that kind of lace themselves together

[00:57:06] I think this is pretty good

[00:57:08] you can't talk yourself out of

[00:57:10] what you have behaved yourself into

[00:57:12] sometimes we get in patterns

[00:57:14] of behaviors and things that we do

[00:57:16] that create those trashy days for us

[00:57:18] and then we sit back and say

[00:57:20] what went wrong? well we went wrong

[00:57:22] Steve and Covey reminded

[00:57:24] leaders that

[00:57:26] leaders manage four things

[00:57:28] we talked about this before

[00:57:30] leaders manage people's attention

[00:57:32] the meaning of things

[00:57:34] they manage trust in relationships

[00:57:36] and the last one that we are talking about today

[00:57:38] they manage themselves

[00:57:40] a true leader is going to be analytical

[00:57:42] about what made that a trashy day

[00:57:44] what made it a good day

[00:57:46] I am going to repeat the good day stuff

[00:57:48] I am going to eliminate trashy day stuff

[00:57:50] and not develop those patterns of behavior

[00:57:52] myself where I get in that downward

[00:57:54] pool Eddie

[00:57:56] and that goes nowhere

[00:57:58] there was an organization that I did

[00:58:00] some feedback on employee survey work

[00:58:02] just a few months ago

[00:58:04] where their scores from their leadership team

[00:58:06] on the pace of work that they experienced

[00:58:08] and whether or not

[00:58:10] they are able to successfully balance their home

[00:58:12] work life, scores were really bad

[00:58:14] really low just a leadership team saying

[00:58:16] this is a real issue for us

[00:58:18] but all the other scores were pretty good

[00:58:20] meaning they felt appreciated

[00:58:22] by the organization

[00:58:24] they challenged in their role and all that

[00:58:26] it's just this balance in the pace of work

[00:58:28] when talking with the leadership team

[00:58:30] it started to come into clarity what was going on

[00:58:32] and they all got it at the same time

[00:58:34] they had all conditioned their self over the years

[00:58:36] to tell their staff

[00:58:38] that hey even if I am not here

[00:58:40] here is my mobile number

[00:58:42] you call me if there is a problem

[00:58:44] tell me about this

[00:58:46] they are really trying to be the most responsive leaders

[00:58:48] but yet what they are doing

[00:58:50] is they have conditioned themselves now

[00:58:52] to not have a work life balance anymore

[00:58:54] a work home balance

[00:58:56] feel free to invade my home life time

[00:58:58] how many years for the taking

[00:59:00] so now when they look back on it

[00:59:02] they don't ever see that they have a balance

[00:59:04] between home and work because they have created that

[00:59:06] blurred line

[00:59:08] and some leaders need to be available

[00:59:10] especially in a healthcare situation

[00:59:12] where sometimes things are very critical

[00:59:14] but I think we can overdo it

[00:59:16] and create an environment where there is no line

[00:59:18] and what we are doing

[00:59:20] is we are perpetuating something that is going to hurt us

[00:59:22] down the road

[00:59:24] physically, emotionally and everything else

[00:59:26] I remember that our actions express our priorities

[00:59:30] what people see us doing

[00:59:32] and spending time on

[00:59:34] communicates what is important to us at the moment

[00:59:36] and we spend a lot of time on something that should not be a high priority

[00:59:38] not only is that communicating

[00:59:40] the wrong message to the employees

[00:59:42] but it is also probably leading to

[00:59:44] a trash day for us

[00:59:46] because we are not getting done the things we should be

[00:59:48] the last thing I will say

[00:59:50] and we have heard many times

[00:59:52] things that matter the most

[00:59:54] should never be at the mercy

[00:59:56] of things that matter the least

[00:59:58] we spend a lot of time

[01:00:00] on trivial stuff

[01:00:02] trying to solve conditions

[01:00:04] rather than problems

[01:00:06] getting aggravated over things

[01:00:08] we don't have control over

[01:00:10] not being able to separate problems and conditions

[01:00:12] getting in our own way

[01:00:14] so that every day we are saying

[01:00:16] oh my god what a bad day

[01:00:18] I don't look forward to tomorrow

[01:00:20] the best thing we are about to say about the day

[01:00:22] is thank god it is over

[01:00:24] or about the week is, thank god it is Friday

[01:00:26] all that type of stuff

[01:00:28] if we find ourselves doing those things

[01:00:30] we are in the wrong role

[01:00:32] of storytelling

[01:00:34] so talking about those trash days

[01:00:36] not only have we talked about what they are

[01:00:38] what leads to them

[01:00:40] diagnosing a trash day

[01:00:42] but then talked about coping mechanisms

[01:00:44] not only during the course of the day

[01:00:46] but after the day is done

[01:00:48] how do we get back on track

[01:00:50] get our mind out of that day

[01:00:52] and get on to a more positive one the next day

[01:00:54] that's exactly what we did

[01:00:56] pretty good though

[01:00:58] so where is your rating scale

[01:01:00] we are up to about 7.2

[01:01:02] on my way up though

[01:01:04] our goal was 8.2

[01:01:06] but I also realized that was a little aggressive

[01:01:08] so we are okay

[01:01:10] you are in the generally acceptable range

[01:01:12] of our happiness scale

[01:01:14] within an hour of going home

[01:01:16] sitting on that deck with something in my hand

[01:01:18] and decompressing and analyzing the day

[01:01:20] perfect

[01:01:22] that will work good

[01:01:24] I hope everybody is listening

[01:01:26] some of this is able to help you

[01:01:28] if you are having a trash day today

[01:01:30] or have one recently

[01:01:32] hopefully this has been some help

[01:01:34] we would love to hear from you

[01:01:36] if you have other thoughts

[01:01:38] maybe some things that you find helpful

[01:01:40] to get through your trash days

[01:01:42] maybe talk about some of the things you have noticed

[01:01:44] that lead to a trash day

[01:01:46] and how to resolve them

[01:01:48] we would love to hear from you

[01:01:50] you can drop us a note at

[01:01:52] info.tv

[01:01:54] that's I-N-F-O

[01:01:56] and a reference leadership GPS

[01:01:58] we would love to hear from you

[01:02:00] maybe in the future we might get some feedback

[01:02:02] online or through an episode itself

[01:02:04] my name is Alan Jackson

[01:02:06] with the Jackson Group

[01:02:08] you can learn a little bit more about what we do

[01:02:10] at thejaxingroup.com

[01:02:12] that's T-H-E

[01:02:14] JacksonGroup.com

[01:02:16] where we specialize in employee, customer satisfaction

[01:02:18] engagement surveys

[01:02:20] all different types of assessment surveys

[01:02:22] for employees and leaders

[01:02:24] we get a sense of where they are

[01:02:26] and their work and their environment

[01:02:28] and some advice and best practices on ways

[01:02:30] to help improve those scores

[01:02:32] across from me has been Tony Jackson

[01:02:34] father and also founder

[01:02:36] of the Jackson Group

[01:02:38] but also very active right now

[01:02:40] in a group he's got called Drive Leadership

[01:02:42] you can learn more about that at driveleadership.com

[01:02:44] and Drive Leadership is really focused

[01:02:46] on taking this idea of managers

[01:02:48] people that have leadership potential

[01:02:50] or looking to get accelerated

[01:02:52] by leadership

[01:02:54] helping them get there through one-to-one consultation

[01:02:56] assessment tools

[01:02:58] some group could work as well all the way through

[01:03:00] anything else on that dad you guys are really finding yourself doing right now

[01:03:02] I think you wrapped it up

[01:03:04] a lot of work on one-to-one leader consults

[01:03:06] I don't call it coaching

[01:03:08] I call it coaching, the coaches

[01:03:10] need to be on the sidelines every day

[01:03:12] every moment for immediate response

[01:03:14] of people that they're coaching

[01:03:16] we're consultants

[01:03:18] we're day laborers basically

[01:03:20] we're a group that's got a lot of drag consultation about

[01:03:22] how to be an effective leader

[01:03:24] not just building leadership skills

[01:03:26] how to be an effective leader

[01:03:28] as a person

[01:03:30] and I think that even references early in the conversation

[01:03:32] talking about sometimes organizations will put people into roles

[01:03:34] expecting that just because they're good managers

[01:03:36] they're all actually going to be a good leader

[01:03:38] and we realize there's a big skill gap

[01:03:40] sometimes in that

[01:03:42] sometimes if people have the potential to be good leaders

[01:03:44] they just need some more guidance

[01:03:46] and some consulting work on getting them there

[01:03:48] and then we'll have a plug

[01:03:50] sure no problem

[01:03:52] and again you've been listening to TheMesh.tv

[01:03:54] check out all of our available shows online

[01:03:56] we've got a really interesting episode

[01:03:58] on stepping up service that we just posted a week or two ago

[01:04:00] where I don't know if you heard the situation

[01:04:02] with the people who recorded their phone call

[01:04:04] with Comcast trying to cancel their service

[01:04:06] did you hear about this?

[01:04:08] Ed Gagnon and I

[01:04:10] with Customer Service Solutions spent about an hour

[01:04:12] dissecting that call

[01:04:14] talking about all the mistakes that were made from a customer service standpoint

[01:04:16] and what that organization really needs to do

[01:04:18] to help fix those scenarios

[01:04:20] so Customer Service we talk about on stepping up service

[01:04:22] we've got a whole other variety of shows

[01:04:24] on TheMesh Network as well

[01:04:26] Entrepreneur Exchange talks about challenges

[01:04:28] and opportunities for people starting a small business

[01:04:30] a lot of great shows to listen to

[01:04:32] all for free on TheMesh.tv

[01:04:34] you know that posting probably calls the president

[01:04:36] of Comcast to have a trashy day don't you?

[01:04:38] I'm sure it did and I'm sure

[01:04:40] he listened to our episode right away

[01:04:42] and you know is playing it back

[01:04:44] for all the employees in the organization as well

[01:04:46] so anyway, well thanks a lot dad

[01:04:48] I appreciate all your input and thoughts on today's topic

[01:04:50] and hope you guys listening

[01:04:52] are not having trashy days but if you do

[01:04:54] hopefully you've got some ideas on how to get through them

[01:04:56] great, alright take care everyone

[01:04:58] bye bye

[01:05:22] check us out online at TheMesh.tv

[01:05:25] discover other network shows

[01:05:27] and give us feedback on what you just heard