The MESH
← I Guess I’ll Do It with Pat House

Joe Conklin

· 52m

0:0052:11

About this episode

Growing up outside Philly, I heard Joe Conklin on the radio my entire childhood; he was one of the first comics I heard tell jokes, do impressions, and sing hilarious music parodies, so I was super excited that Joe sat down with me to talk about his career, which began while Joe was just a kid. Impressions of family members, teachers, and celebrities were the catalyst for what would become his calling. From class clown to stand-up comedian, we discuss his impressions of local celebrities (and those that didn't care for his impressions of them), nightmare gigs, a career in radio, and - of course, Lenny Dykstra. Only this January, Magic Mind helps you gear up to crush your 2024 New Year resolutions fully focused. You get 1 month for free when you’re subscribing for 3 months at: https://www.magicmind.com/JANdoit And with my code: DOIT20 It’s an extra 20% off, which gets you up to 75% off. This only lasts until the end of January, so hurry up before it goes away! Pat House is a nationally touring comedian based out of Philadelphia. A regular performer in comedy clubs, casinos, and theaters all over the country, Pat has been a choice opener for Sebastian Maniscalco, Tom Segura, and Dan Cummins. He recorded his first album Biggest Thing in 2013, and his latest album Heard Enough Yesterday, hit #1 on the iTunes comedy charts. Both can be heard on iTunes, Amazon, and Pandora. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
Transcript9,618 words — click to read
[00:00:02] What you want when you want it where you want it this is the mesh [00:00:27] Yeah, any way you want to put it it works for me. I can hear you good. Thank you for being here [00:00:33] My place we're just gonna roll with a conversation talk shop about halfway through [00:00:38] I have to do like a quick 30 second ad read and then I'm just we're just gonna just you got advertisers [00:00:43] Well, I have I have my very first one [00:00:47] So well, hopefully it works out well. It's on capacity [00:00:52] Yeah, so [00:00:53] Make it awkward for 30 seconds in the middle there, but we'll bring you right back [00:00:57] But anyway, we'll keep this short into the point and you ready to roll in a second. Oh, yeah, cool [00:01:02] I'm just gonna bring you right on [00:01:04] Hello and welcome to another episode of I Guess I'll Do It with Pat House a mostly comedy podcast where I talk to [00:01:11] All sorts of comedians and other creative people today my guest. I'm super excited to have I've been a fan of my whole entire life [00:01:20] ESPN NFL films Philly comedy radio legend today. I have Joe Conklin here. What's up, Joe? [00:01:27] Hey, Pat, how are you? I'm doing very well. How about yourself? What's going on? [00:01:31] Paxson hollow legend Paxson hollow legend, you know, I have that in my notes here because numerous times [00:01:39] Numerous times I have been working been behind the bar and you have come in to do stand-up at an event a fundraiser [00:01:46] Whatever and it's like god damn it. I'm not even the most famous comic at my day job [00:01:53] But yeah, that's happened numerous times [00:01:55] It's great spot. Yes [00:01:57] It's right there and that's considered Marple. I guess right absolutely is Marple Township. Yep [00:02:03] I've been doing stand-up and bartending there both 20 years this year both [00:02:08] Congratulations. That's great. Yeah, I love both man. I really do Paxson's been very very good to me and [00:02:14] comedies slowly getting better every other decade did you grow up there five minutes away? [00:02:20] Yeah, I'm from Springfield Delaware County. Oh, you're from for okay. So you want to Springfield high? I went to O'Hara [00:02:25] Oh, gotcha. You're a Catholic not a publican. Yep. I am a Catholic. What about you? [00:02:31] Where would you I went to dockerty which is also Cardinal? Yeah, and [00:02:37] Do you know have you ever been in the building of dockerty? No, I want to say no. It's the same exact [00:02:44] Building as oh, how it's the same tile the same layout [00:02:48] It's obviously built by the same [00:02:51] Architect or whatever builder it when I went into a hair for a show about 10 years ago [00:02:56] I was like this is wild that's so they're very similar in that respect like how every like outdoor mall shopping complex is now [00:03:03] They're exactly the same all the exact store like the forever 21 is next to this dumb restaurant [00:03:09] They're all the formulaic and they both [00:03:12] They both dumped a whole bunch of Irish Catholics in each building [00:03:17] 100% [00:03:20] Dude, I'm so glad to have you on because we've been buddies for a while [00:03:23] We've worked together many times over my career, but I've have you were actually one of the earliest voices [00:03:29] I've ever heard in comedy in general because my stepdad is a [00:03:34] Sports radio listener and grew up listening to you on 610. WIP and he had [00:03:39] Your conglon Christmas classic CD [00:03:43] So I remember listening to that as a kid and hearing you on the radio [00:03:47] So believe it or not even though I was watching you know letterman and letterman and SNL and all that kind of stuff [00:03:53] I was kind of familiar with your comedy even before that from just being in the car as a very young kid [00:03:59] Making me feel old dude. No, it's it's [00:04:04] Praising the influence here [00:04:06] I appreciate that. Thank you. So I want to I really don't know much about your background in comedy here [00:04:12] So I would love to know [00:04:14] What your comedy influences were when you were a kid and I would love to hear about the very first time you did stand up and how [00:04:21] You got there well [00:04:23] Well, it all started for me with the voices and the impressions, you know [00:04:28] that's my pretty much my act and I [00:04:32] Think you'd have to say I was a voice guide that had to learn how to be a comedian [00:04:38] Who are you doing voices of where you're making fun of your parents and teachers when you were a kid? [00:04:41] Yeah, yeah my my neighbors my uncles, you know, I did you know Howard Cocell John Wayne [00:04:49] Couple celebrities but people on the block [00:04:52] People in school the nuns the priests. I think I did my first they used to put me up at [00:04:58] company we used to call it at company like a [00:05:02] Easter and at holidays when they we had company in the house [00:05:07] I don't know to somebody else's house and I would do a handful of voices like Tennessee Tuxedo and [00:05:15] Hogan zeroes characters. Mr. Haney from Green Acres dog cow commercial. This is my first set [00:05:23] Just doing it for friends and family in the living room [00:05:26] correct, so [00:05:29] As I got older I went into grade school and and then I you know, I was always, you know doing doing this [00:05:38] Typical class clown I'm trouble a lot, you know, okay, so you were one of the ones who was a class clown [00:05:45] Without question. It's like 50-50 with my guests [00:05:47] I always get that out of comics and it's I think it's 50-50. I was not I didn't say a word in [00:05:55] High school, but I feel like a lot of comics [00:05:57] I would truly say it's split dead even between those who were class clowns and those who were like [00:06:03] People didn't even know my name in high school [00:06:05] Yeah, my guess introvert extrovert maybe absolutely [00:06:10] But you know, I've always was I'm one of seven so maybe I was craving attention [00:06:17] Who knows I would say this are you the younger half of the seven? Yeah, that probably [00:06:23] Oh, yeah, you're second wrong in the ladder and [00:06:27] So they had this thing called the Catholic Charities appeal [00:06:33] Talent show it would come around in May [00:06:37] The choir would put on a show and they would try to get people from the parish to come in the evening [00:06:44] It was you know, it was a talent show, you know, they had basically it was a lot of songs [00:06:49] Woman playing the piano and here comes Billy singing one now the choir with chorus would sing some so they weren't around [00:06:56] From home room to home room asking if anybody had any talent [00:07:01] So and my buddies were raising my hand for me and [00:07:05] I [00:07:07] Said I'll all right [00:07:08] I'll go down so they have this kind of audition and I I did a handful of impressions and [00:07:13] That was it for me. That's when everything started. I was in seventh grade and I'm [00:07:20] They put me in the show. I did believe it or not, you know, I did some people that are still in my act [00:07:26] I did that Bernie Pirant, Bobby Clark [00:07:29] Alfred Hitchcock like I said John Wayne. Oh, that's awesome dog chow commercial you're in seventh grade with this [00:07:37] Yeah, man, you're a kid kid [00:07:40] Yeah, the the Flyers had just won two cups [00:07:44] Yeah, flyers were winning the cups and [00:07:47] That was like, you know, I was doing sports sports comedy sports voices [00:07:53] So I did it in the eighth grade also and then it was kind of like a feel like I'm definitely [00:07:58] I want to do this for my career as far as something with my voice [00:08:03] Now are you watching like Carson at the time or like [00:08:08] In any stand-up [00:08:10] Not really. I was more interested in somebody like rich little okay [00:08:15] You know that that was the unique situation where anybody was doing voices like wow this guy does this for a living [00:08:22] so [00:08:23] At some point I started thinking away from show biz and you know [00:08:29] I didn't know if that was could be a career or not [00:08:32] And I you know they're asking about college and I thought well, let me I would like to be an announcer [00:08:37] I want to be a radio announcer. I want to be Harry Callis [00:08:40] So I I you know, I knew I was gonna go to Temple University because my parents couldn't our family [00:08:47] Really couldn't afford me to send any the fort to send me anywhere else [00:08:53] So I had targeted Temple and that's kind of what happened [00:08:57] I was gonna be a sports announcer, you know, and then [00:09:01] Senior year that had another variety show. I got back up on stage [00:09:04] I hadn't been on stage since eighth grade and [00:09:08] I did all my stuff again the voices and then I started doing the PA announcing it at carnal dockerty [00:09:16] Just senior year at the basketball. All right, so now you have a microphone [00:09:21] Exactly and I was creating at some attention and they [00:09:28] The they did an article about me in the daily news the school [00:09:32] You know the sports guys head Solari used to write about this, you know [00:09:37] basketball team and the football team so he came to one of the games and heard me doing zinc off and and [00:09:43] Dan Baker and Bill Campbell and [00:09:46] He wrote an article about me. So anytime something like that happens is it builds your confidence, you know [00:09:52] Well, this is great. I really feel like I can get a career out of this on the way to the communications major [00:10:00] I'm taking these [00:10:07] classes and [00:10:09] I don't know what was what but I got a summer job selling pots and pans and [00:10:15] Fine China and I went to Bermuda twice [00:10:18] So then it's like somebody got my ear and said, you know the money in the communicator in the broadcast industry [00:10:27] Is in sales? [00:10:29] So I was like wow, I'm gonna be in salesman. I'm gonna be a salesman and I'm gonna be selling radio time [00:10:35] Because the you know the on air stuff is a long shot [00:10:39] Why I wound up getting a an internship which is the key to everything for my success [00:10:47] Temple has this great program [00:10:48] And I mean don't even go to college if you're not gonna get an internship like I see us shout that from the eye [00:10:54] I went to temple for communications [00:10:57] As well. Yeah, hopefully you got an internship dude. I didn't do shit [00:11:01] I started bartending and doing stand-up at 19 and I'll be 40 soon and I'm still doing both [00:11:06] Well, they had this program where you know, I got an internship in the sales and [00:11:14] Channel 17 and [00:11:16] So the kind of the path was set where I was gonna interview for sales jobs when I graduated [00:11:21] I wound up getting a job in Trenton at a Trenton radio station WKXW [00:11:28] selling airtime because [00:11:30] It was kind of like a farm so a guy [00:11:34] The previous intern at channel 17 [00:11:37] He got hired there and it was like a little pipeline for [00:11:40] For people up in to go to Trenton. It was a pass. So I went up there started selling [00:11:47] At the same time right after college. I started doing stand-up a little bit. All right [00:11:52] Let's stop there real quick. Where was your first set doing stand-up around the city? [00:11:58] The capital Plaza Hotel in Trenton, New Jersey, okay [00:12:02] Yeah, was it my first set it was New Year's Eve of [00:12:07] 1984 into 85 Wow a New Year's Eve open mic [00:12:13] Well wasn't an open mic oh [00:12:16] It was a show and they threw me up there as a guest [00:12:20] As a favor to somebody with the radio station so that goes back to that [00:12:26] I mean getting in the building at the station was the key to everything [00:12:30] So I was in the building in the sales department kind of the pestering [00:12:35] You know sniffing around [00:12:37] you know the [00:12:39] Like like the normal setup the morning DJ was like an MC guy at one of the clubs and [00:12:47] I was in his ear trying to get you know telling him funny and things like that and [00:12:54] He he greased this kids for me into [00:12:58] You know scar paddies it was a scar paddy room. Oh, okay, right [00:13:02] Yeah, one of his dude he used to have about he had 15 at least 15 [00:13:09] Really really good rooms at one time when I started there was still eight or nine [00:13:14] Now he had he had I [00:13:17] Think his first one might have been in Wilmington called the greenery or something like that [00:13:22] He also had Trenton at the capital Plaza. He had [00:13:26] Doylestown and King of Prussia all around the suburbs, but Doylestown still going strong [00:13:32] Doylestown's a great room. They were all as good as that at one time [00:13:36] So that that would tell you what kind of empire he had [00:13:39] Yeah, he really had you know and that was bigger than downtown. I mean downtown was actually I should [00:13:45] I shouldn't really say that downtown was great. There was three good clubs [00:13:49] There was three great clubs. It was the the works the outlet and [00:13:53] Gone bananas around the corner and okay anyway, I digress. Yeah, that was that was my first [00:14:01] Guest spot. How did that go your first? It went okay. It was it was you know wasn't [00:14:08] It was five minutes. I did I did I did well I guess but [00:14:13] And then I pretty much lost my job. I quit the sales job and started kicking around [00:14:20] I was also a mobile DJ at the time. I started getting some club gigs there [00:14:25] Trying to sneak my comedy into my DJ. Okay, I think Jim Florentine was kind of doing the same thing [00:14:31] He was jamming Jim [00:14:33] He was a DJ was with sprinkle his jokes in a set [00:14:36] What a great [00:14:39] DJ [00:14:41] I [00:14:43] Don't talk about other comics [00:14:46] That's great. I miss a man. I've seen him [00:14:49] Right right before the pandemic I saw him. We did the stress factory together [00:14:53] okay [00:14:54] so [00:14:55] What the heck was that gonna say so a year goes by [00:14:59] The guy that I worked with in Trenton in sales has moved on to Philadelphia. He works at cau [00:15:07] am 1210 [00:15:09] And he says hey, you want to get together for a drink happy hour? Sure. I'll meet you out of city [00:15:14] Lineout at Fridays [00:15:15] I go out there [00:15:17] We're hanging out. He brings a guy from the fm two sales persons [00:15:21] He starts queuing me up to do some voices. I start doing voices [00:15:25] The guy said, you know, we just hired a new morning guy on the fm [00:15:29] He's looking for somebody who does voices [00:15:31] beautiful [00:15:32] I went to home that night made a tape up little cassette my handheld cassette [00:15:37] And I got it after I was I put on there wilson good rodney dangerfield eddie murphy [00:15:43] Um, you know, it was the 80 it was 1986 [00:15:47] So and the guy that they just they just uh [00:15:52] It just got rid of barski [00:15:54] in the bar ski in the morning. Yep [00:15:56] They hired terry young the motor math [00:16:00] terry young [00:16:01] Took over and they they brought me him to audition a live audition on air audition [00:16:07] And you know, it went it went okay [00:16:10] They said you did pretty good today kid. Why don't you come back tomorrow? [00:16:15] So I came back tomorrow and I did a few and then it was like a couple days at a time and then [00:16:21] Then I was in there full-time and within two months [00:16:23] they had a contract for me because [00:16:26] terry was working without a contract and he was bitching they gave us both contracts [00:16:31] They gave him one for like 90 thousand dollars and they gave me one for 40 and i'm like [00:16:37] Holy [00:16:40] Yeah [00:16:47] You know, wow, it was a great salary get coming out of college at that point [00:16:51] I think when I was selling in Trenton, I was making about 16 maybe it was like a draw [00:16:56] Now you're getting more than double that just to like be on air and do comedy [00:17:02] Just to be on this podcast [00:17:07] Um, so anyway, those are just the numbers where so that that was it [00:17:12] Man, that was like oh my god. I can't believe you know, I'm on morning radio doing voices in Philadelphia [00:17:18] Which is the fourth largest mark in the country. It was crazy. I had I had [00:17:23] a early success [00:17:25] Well within and then later that year [00:17:28] They uh, I'm in the channel 10 building another thing about just being in the building [00:17:33] I'm in the channel 10 building. You know where it is on city. Absolutely [00:17:37] They had a show they're starting a new tv show [00:17:40] They're auditioning people and they said um, they were looking for some people while these tv types were auditioning [00:17:48] where they were looking for these people to be fake guests like [00:17:52] You know celebrities just to see these guys work out there. It's Sheila Allen Stevens and you know, and and they said [00:17:59] well, let's pretend you're jack nickel sim and [00:18:02] And jimmy gnatowski and things like that and I did that and and that was on camera [00:18:08] In front of management and they said we like this guy. We've got to get him involved [00:18:13] So when the show started they chose matt lauer from new york [00:18:17] Sheila allen stevens from their own, uh stable of reporters [00:18:22] Put the show together called live on city line made me the on camera announcer at the beginning of the show [00:18:30] They it's live. It's crazy. Whatever. This is live on city line. Here's your host matt lauer [00:18:38] Sheila so now [00:18:40] I got a tv job a radio job. I just had a baby too. This is 87 now a year later [00:18:46] So within within two weeks of that [00:18:49] Uh, no that show lasted three months [00:18:52] And then they just canceled it. They said, you know, it's not working out [00:18:56] And within two weeks later [00:18:59] They changed radio formats. So now i'm out of two jobs [00:19:04] And it's like boom boom boom [00:19:07] This shit it's like one blow after the other and I just had a kid [00:19:11] Peaks and valleys man. They never go away [00:19:14] It's amazing. So now i'm hustling um [00:19:17] hustling [00:19:20] Geeks at the clubs. Can I get a tuesday night? Can we get a comedy night on wednesday night? [00:19:25] I'm trying to you know, that's when I started like being a biker a little bit, you know [00:19:30] grabbing rooms here and um, just try [00:19:34] It's just trying to make it, you know fill out the week and against me [00:19:38] Um, and then I just kicks around doing that until wip came along [00:19:44] Which um, that's a brand new format with sports. I thought it was [00:19:48] A perfect matchup because i'm already doing sports material [00:19:52] I'm doing harry callis and you know the flyers and [00:19:56] All this in my act. Yeah, that's [00:19:59] In the tavern on the tavern circuit [00:20:02] Do you remember? You don't remember a room in ridley called the friendly [00:20:06] Friendly tavern. No, but I did stand up there used to be a place called the heritage ballroom in ridley [00:20:11] It was next to barnabees and they had events there [00:20:15] Yep, um, they also had a room on 30. This is paul [00:20:19] That was big daddy's room actually paul salari was a dude that had a bunch of rooms. Yeah, I did the havertown vfw for him [00:20:27] um [00:20:29] Yeah [00:20:30] Hold on for a second. Oh, there was on 30. There was john barley corns [00:20:36] And and another friendly. What was the havertown for fw? [00:20:40] I I think I think it was on steel road, but you just said john barley corns [00:20:44] That's a skill that's american american. Yeah, yeah, yeah american legion john barley corns. Wasn't that the um [00:20:50] Is that a traffic or a cream record? [00:20:53] Yeah, you're right. Yeah [00:20:55] That was traffic. Steve what john barley corns must die. Steve winwood. Steve winwood's band. Yeah [00:21:01] I was like, where do I know that name from? [00:21:04] Well, it means booze [00:21:07] Anyway, um, so what the hell was I where was I so so yeah, so so I got a tape out to um [00:21:15] wip [00:21:16] when um when the sports talk came around and that was angelo and brookshire and [00:21:23] Nobody called me back. I sent three tapes out about six months. I'm following up with phone calls, which is the rack, you know [00:21:31] audition and resume tape audition and resume tapes [00:21:35] Man [00:21:36] Easier than now with that kind of stuff sending tapes and making phone calls [00:21:39] Or is it if the internet made shit better with emails and youtube and hey, here's my [00:21:44] Clip, it's in your inbox in two seconds [00:21:48] Oh, it's gotta be it's gotta be easier now. I mean, I think the whole [00:21:53] Were in you know what? You're right. That's interesting about showbiz in general [00:21:58] You know with youtube and with people being able, you know [00:22:01] The only way you waited years ago was through carcin and and that was it now [00:22:06] If it's god the guy on youtube salise singer for journey now, right? So i'm in that respect [00:22:11] Wild [00:22:12] It's it's wide open. But yeah, I would say it's easier. But so you had to go through this, you know [00:22:20] System where it's just tougher tougher to get in front of people, you know [00:22:24] Anyway, where the hell was I so yeah finally somebody that my tape's laying around in a [00:22:31] You know of six inches from the waste basket [00:22:34] It's laying on a table a dude picks it. He's an afternoon producer [00:22:39] He puts it in plays it. He likes it. He's here's harry callis and richie ashburn [00:22:45] He plays it for jody mcdonald who's the midday host there [00:22:49] I wasn't even going for that job jody hears that he likes it. He calls me at home [00:22:54] And I start on his show as a caller [00:22:58] Every i called every thursday at two o'clock and did 10 minutes three voices [00:23:04] Three impressions people like barkley jimmy linem bill cosby [00:23:09] johnny mattis, whoever whoever [00:23:12] And and I did that for nothing for a year [00:23:15] Just getting plugs out of it until the morning show started hearing me and replaying my stuff in the morning [00:23:22] And then that was the following year was 93 when the fillies went to the world's series [00:23:28] And what when you when you when your teams are doing well, you get there's [00:23:33] You know how the tv stations go nuts with the mania. We're out here. We have fillies fans here [00:23:39] You know you see it now with the eagles and the fillies when they're back in you know [00:23:43] Channel six has four different angles of eagle stew or fillies when they're in the you know the championship [00:23:49] Anyway that bodes bode well for me because I was I was doing harry callis [00:23:54] I was getting on little shots on the news [00:23:57] Anyway, they offered me a job of the morning show and um [00:24:01] And I signed up. I got a contract. I was there for 10 years [00:24:05] and [00:24:06] Left for three to go to mmr came back [00:24:09] And you know been doing it for like 35 years. Awesome. Um, what did what did you do when you went over to mmr? [00:24:16] We had a show called the filly guys. It was me mike mason ellie and vinny the cry [00:24:20] Oh [00:24:22] You never heard of it. Yeah, yeah the fact that you never heard of it is uh, uh, testimony to why [00:24:29] not on the [00:24:31] No, they um, go ahead [00:24:34] They were they were actually I found out later. They were really trying to get president steve [00:24:39] But president steve wasn't available yet. There's still y 100 [00:24:43] Uh, and they were kind of a lot of precedent in marilin to start [00:24:46] Here [00:24:47] Steve was one of my very first guests on this podcast [00:24:49] He was very helpful when I first started and the fact that he has such a huge following with their radio show [00:24:55] And the fact that he was a stand-up. He was a great first guest one of the one of the first guests [00:24:59] Oh, absolutely [00:25:01] Good dude too brilliant, right? So yes, he's so smart [00:25:05] He really he can pull out not just a fact [00:25:08] But like a random true fact and a joke so quickly with just such an obscure insane [00:25:15] off the wall reference [00:25:18] Yeah, he's a unique dude and very talented and uh, they were they were both very nice to me when [00:25:24] When uh when I transitioned out of well, it gets kind of is radio like stand-up like I mean you're still all family [00:25:30] And it's a small world [00:25:33] Yeah, it is in in the long run, but it's not and I don't know radio is different now because [00:25:39] So many there's only like two companies and there's like seven stations under this company and seven stations [00:25:44] under that one easily and then something else [00:25:47] Yeah, it's it's a lot less [00:25:50] In the in the old days when there were 20 different companies [00:25:53] they used to [00:25:55] they used to kind of [00:25:57] I don't know convince you into going to [00:26:00] Going to war, you know against your rival station and winning was everything but that was [00:26:07] That was just for management really. I mean like a Howard Stern John DeBella thing [00:26:11] Oh, of course. Yeah, that was that right when I started oh [00:26:15] Oh, so you were right in the middle of all that. Well not in the middle of it, but on the front lines for it front row seat [00:26:22] Without question it was 86. I believe when that happened [00:26:26] Um went when stern came to the market Terry young [00:26:30] Would talk about him and stuff and we weren't even a blip on the radar there [00:26:34] That was stern versus DeBella was the king [00:26:37] He had it for like three years 83 84 85 86 something like that. He owned Philadelphia [00:26:43] Howard came in and just you know cut slittest throat was all over [00:26:49] It was crazy. So yeah, I started in 86 and I was uh, you know, we [00:26:53] I was on the air in that but I was we were just bystanders [00:26:57] That was that was just those two stations but to get back to yeah, it's a small community [00:27:01] I mean there used to be more competition when it was about station pride [00:27:06] I think when the conglom or when the um the merger started happening [00:27:10] You realize how corporate it is and [00:27:13] They're very the fewer job jobs started disappearing because it's all the same company [00:27:19] And then you got more camaraderie. Uh, yeah [00:27:22] Because you know you're just trying to survive. Yeah, it's almost like uh, Alan Havy had a great quote about stand-ups [00:27:28] He goes we're all we're all in this together, but we're all out for ourselves, but we're still all in this together [00:27:36] Uh, yeah, correct for stand-up radio might not be the exact same thing [00:27:40] But it's still it's a small world and it is a tight knit [00:27:43] Can be contained a community [00:27:46] Yeah, because when I'm at when you're a temple. I don't know. Did you work at the radio station at all? [00:27:52] Man, I didn't do anything [00:27:54] You didn't do anything [00:27:55] I was going out. Honestly, I started doing stand-up when I was 19 and I was out doing open mics six nights a week [00:28:01] Like I just dove right in to stand up [00:28:04] I I went to class. I worked in the box office at helium [00:28:07] So I was I had a job in a comedy club and I was doing open mics every single night [00:28:12] So I wasn't giving a shit about my education. Couldn't you? [00:28:15] Couldn't you match that up with your education at all? I well, I mean I [00:28:20] That's a long story kind of and I tried [00:28:24] um [00:28:25] And it didn't quite work out, but I mean [00:28:29] I I realized I [00:28:31] I just dove right in to stand up when I was in college like I enjoyed college and had fun [00:28:34] But I just put everything into stand-up [00:28:38] I still did okay in college. It's just it was like [00:28:42] second or third on my priority list [00:28:45] Gotcha [00:28:46] So since you you've made a career out of these voices and stuff who's been the easiest target? [00:28:51] Like who's what what character or not a character voice? [00:28:56] I shouldn't say is your favorite like over the course of your career [00:28:59] Who has been the first one that like come to your mind or like oh, he did it again [00:29:02] Like does someone make themselves a target for you? [00:29:06] Oh, well, I've had the most success with my best impressions like harry callis is probably my my signature over the years [00:29:15] um [00:29:16] You know you want something like that [00:29:19] That's a one that you can do well that that um immediately [00:29:24] Will turn ahead if people hear it on stuff like him on the on the live mic was just so great because it sounded like oh, absolutely [00:29:33] pretty much say anything and [00:29:36] And so and it was so recognized. Absolutely [00:29:38] He used to live in either springfield or media because I used to see him at sprawl lanes when I was a kid [00:29:43] And I remember bowling next to him and his son and it was just weird to hear that voice next to you [00:29:49] naturally like in the in your [00:29:52] Pick up that [00:29:55] So might be them over at john's [00:29:58] Walk tavern or the the old jinn mill on old state road and a number of other [00:30:04] Jappies up towards the reservoir [00:30:07] But harry was great. So targets wise [00:30:11] It's funny what the first show I was Reagan was still the Reagan was president when I started and we had [00:30:18] So I mean the president's always a target [00:30:21] We had Reagan. Um, I don't know if you remember the sinking houses of logan [00:30:25] There was a um a story on up in uh, well logan on rusevill boulevard where these houses are [00:30:32] were sinking and um, they had [00:30:35] They had demolished them all [00:30:38] I don't know why we put reagan on it, but reagan was one of my uh, my characters and I had a line said one of my probably my [00:30:45] First joke one of my first jokes on the radio [00:30:48] Well, now you know what happens if you try to build a house on an ash hole [00:30:55] Or you can never build it. You should never build a house on an ash hole [00:30:59] Yeah, it was a creek that was filled. It was an old creek they put ash in anyway [00:31:06] um [00:31:09] Let me tell you guys about magic mine like mox comics like most people [00:31:14] I struggle with being productive just sitting down and getting the work done when I need to [00:31:20] Luckily the great folks over at magic mine have just the thing to help [00:31:24] Magic mind is a great little drink that boosts energy and [00:31:28] Focus I typically have it either after my morning coffee or in the afternoon when the coffee starts to wear off [00:31:35] These little bottles of magic mine are perfect for at home or on the go anytime you need calming energy [00:31:43] And a boost. I know that sounds crazy, but it's true [00:31:48] There's an ingredient in it called lion's mane mushroom, which is reduces anxiety while also [00:31:54] Stimulating the brain for better energy and less stress [00:31:58] Magic mind is great. I use it every day and you can get one month free when subscribing for three months [00:32:05] Just go to [00:32:07] www.magicmind.com [00:32:09] Slash jan do it [00:32:12] That is [00:32:14] magicmind.com [00:32:16] Jan do it type in the promo code do it 20 all caps do it 20 all caps [00:32:24] I'm recommending it to you. I use it all the time make sure you check out magic mind [00:32:28] Dot com slash jan do it 20 and use the promo code do it 20 for one month free when you subscribe for three months [00:32:38] Um, have you ever had anybody take offense to one of your impressions impressions of them? [00:32:44] Yeah, um [00:32:46] You know ricky waters [00:32:48] The old eagles running back [00:32:51] He wants to throttle me somebody said you shouldn't show up there because ricky's up there and he he's after you [00:32:56] He wants still [00:32:58] No, no, no, this was at the time. This is the late 90s. I was gonna say this [00:33:02] I was just gonna say mid to late 90s. Yeah [00:33:04] Yes, uh, we had a lot of fun. What did you say about ricky? Was it his voice or was it or would you to make fun of him? [00:33:15] Well with ricky like for what I um [00:33:20] I used to have this one joke where um, you know, he his wife was uh asian [00:33:25] By the way, we can never get away with half the shit we said on the air years ago [00:33:29] Oh, i'm sure. Yeah all the ethnic is over. You can't say anything like that [00:33:35] But he had an asian girlfriend that got in the face of john [00:33:39] John gruden the offensive coordinator at the time for the eagles [00:33:43] publicly screaming at him because ricky didn't get enough touches [00:33:48] So we used to always do her in the background [00:33:53] It's like, you know, I I have um [00:33:56] I'm changed now. I'm married. You know, I got a girlfriend. We got we got twins [00:34:01] We got twins. We got two babies. We named them for who [00:34:06] for what [00:34:09] famously for who for what [00:34:12] Comments years ago. Did he ever say anything to your face or is this all something you heard through the grapevine? [00:34:19] grapevine grapevine. Yeah [00:34:21] Um, but then I met dick for meal [00:34:24] I remember uh, I don't know if you remember when they were gonna hire him for the eagles before he took the ram's job back [00:34:32] Around the same time period [00:34:34] Your meal got back into football. He had been retired for a good 10 years [00:34:38] I do remember he was doing the blue cross blue shield commercial. Sure and um [00:34:43] He had a famous quote the eagles kind of screwed him [00:34:46] Um, and he said I would have promised this job on three different occasions [00:34:51] And and and i'm not gonna get down on my fricandese and beg your every lordy coach this freaking football team [00:34:58] He we started um, we ran with that. We had uh [00:35:03] Uh eagles welcome the eagles uh the fricking freaking eagles talk with dick for meal [00:35:08] Welcome to freaking eagle. So we had frickin this and that so I met for meal at a bank with the max walk club bank [00:35:14] But I just I went up and introduced myself. I said, how you doing dick? [00:35:17] I'm joe conch. I'm the guy that's been [00:35:19] Imitating you on the radio. Oh, I know who you are. You got that [00:35:23] You got that freaking part down pretty good, don't you? [00:35:27] And you know a handful of older guys, but oh ray rose [00:35:31] Ray actually liked me but ray ray um [00:35:34] Ray rose the coach right before andy reed, right? Correct. Yeah, and ray [00:35:39] had a [00:35:42] Used a profanity [00:35:44] Um profusely let's say he was he had a harp and he was cursed at his press conference [00:35:50] Which you carried on the radio [00:35:52] They had to start blipping them and delaying him because he was so nuts with the curses [00:35:57] He had a rant one time. He says, you know, um [00:36:01] something about um [00:36:03] You got to look at the other uh other team like they're gonna break in your house and rape your wife and children [00:36:10] Yeah, this this is true. You gotta look that up. He he jesus. He said and then he said, what what do you mean, ray? [00:36:17] Clarify that it's like, yeah, you got to look at that other team like they're gonna [00:36:22] Sodomize your kids and your wife [00:36:24] Jesus [00:36:27] I used to do this thing every banquet. I was out of center or again like I say it work again [00:36:32] Um, I do that that last hurt that last loss [00:36:37] Really hurt me a hurt deep down inside of me [00:36:41] Did I say something? [00:36:44] So he comes up to me before this thing at the adams mark [00:36:49] um [00:36:50] One of the bank was and he says amen didn't we fail man lay off that side of me shit my bank [00:36:57] So [00:37:00] It's great [00:37:02] Well, it's cool. I didn't tell you to take it off the table completely [00:37:04] Just hey, could you do me a favor tonight and not say this but yeah, no problem [00:37:08] Oh, he was totally cool. He's a good guy, you know, he's he had uh, he liked the ponies at the racetrack [00:37:13] But he um and he didn't you know ray was yeah, well he was a hitter. He was a safety. I believe [00:37:20] um in the old nfl like in the 70s [00:37:24] I think he played for the giants and he probably was a little um [00:37:29] You know had his bell rung a lot. He used to use smelling salts on the sidelines to wake himself up [00:37:35] Or to wake himself up. I swear [00:37:38] There's a story with ray [00:37:41] and smelling salts [00:37:43] I don't know the exact the exact um details [00:37:47] But he would he would carry around smelling salts for to to revive to to get himself going [00:37:54] I've just never heard of anybody [00:37:56] doing that for themselves. That's that's [00:38:00] Um now sometimes like when we're on stage as comics, we're just on autopilot, right? [00:38:04] You know, we know what bit we're doing. We know what bit we're doing next [00:38:06] We know it's coming after that have you ever been so in the zone [00:38:10] You have done an impression [00:38:12] And then but did somebody else's voice [00:38:14] You ever said hey, this is harry callis and then you did [00:38:17] Alan ever sin or like have you ever just and just fucked up while being on autopilot? [00:38:22] I've definitely been on autopilot [00:38:25] I I have not done what you just said [00:38:28] But I remember and I still get confused on this [00:38:32] When you do more than one show a night [00:38:34] Oh, yeah, it's brutal because you don't know what you did yet [00:38:38] And I [00:38:40] I don't know if I've repeated myself [00:38:43] Like did I do that? Yeah, I definitely said a couple times more than one saying [00:38:48] Get in the middle of the bit and saying did I do this already and sometimes it's yes. We just heard that or [00:38:55] No, no, we don't know what you're talking about [00:38:57] um [00:38:59] What's I've a couple times like with covet [00:39:01] um [00:39:03] A lot of comedy clubs. They were limited capacity. So sometimes you would do three shows in one day and [00:39:09] um [00:39:10] I remember being on that third show so many Saturdays and being like, oh my god [00:39:15] I already did this on the show, but I didn't but ma'am doing the same thing three times in one day for 35 40 45 minutes [00:39:22] I was like [00:39:24] It really rocks your head man. Yeah, no no question about it. So uh auto-pilot thing now [00:39:30] I'm I've never gotten really confused like that. I don't know what the but i'm sure some something like that has happened [00:39:37] Oh, of course we've all had all sorts of uh, you know, fuck ups on stage and whatnot [00:39:43] Um, so I was looking at your uh youtube today and I totally forgot about that lennie dykstra roast [00:39:49] Oh, dude. I wish I wish you could I wish dude [00:39:53] All I did was watch mitch williams and lennie dykstra go back and forth and I was like I have to watch this whole thing later [00:39:59] Oh, was it awkward? You were sitting right next to lennie. I mean [00:40:03] Too [00:40:05] The worst gig I ever did my life was when I opened for leon redbone at the chestnut cabaret [00:40:11] I believe it was 88 like come and get your love red bone [00:40:15] No, that's red bone leon red bone was a um a guy that sang old fashioned songs from the 20s [00:40:22] I had the red bone part right [00:40:27] Wait, but come and get red bone sing sing that song [00:40:30] Come and get your love. He was the only native american artist to have a hit [00:40:34] Red bone. Oh my god, that's right [00:40:37] And it's recently in like a uh truck commercial for like dodge or um, oh, it was a big hit [00:40:42] I mean, it's very recognized but it's in a commercial now [00:40:45] I can see the video when he was on bandstand or something [00:40:48] Yeah, leon red bone used to do snl [00:40:52] At least a handful of time. I want to be seduce this bud for you [00:40:57] Mom mom mom he did a bud commercial. He was like an old time [00:41:03] Oh, I want to aim this but no one to talk to all by myself [00:41:08] Anyway, he's like a cult [00:41:11] Following type guy. He he was at it actually lived locally in new hope [00:41:17] Long story short. He he was a [00:41:20] Very big middle act let's say [00:41:24] I hope I got you [00:41:26] I had to do 15 minutes [00:41:29] And I opened with gary hide nick material because it was fresh [00:41:34] and I wanted to be cutting edge [00:41:36] and [00:41:37] They weren't ready for that the dude just [00:41:41] It's just came out [00:41:43] You know who hide nick is right? Yes. Okay all the shit he did with the torture in the basement and [00:41:49] all that stuff and I um [00:41:52] I just lost the crowd immediately and I never got them back [00:41:57] And I didn't want to bail because I was afraid I wasn't going to get paid because that was always the rule [00:42:02] You didn't do your time. You don't get your whole 40 bucks or whatever stick [00:42:06] That's I think that was the first roll you ever heard in stand-up a stick to your time [00:42:10] Yeah, so I had to stay there. They're screaming in the L [00:42:14] And I mean I think I got something throwing at me [00:42:16] It was just and I and that was the one gig that I I I decided well, I think I can [00:42:21] Invite my family out to this one after I had been doing comedy for about six months [00:42:27] Uh, not a good night for the whole family [00:42:31] and anyway [00:42:33] um, I always say that because that the second worst night was the dike stir [00:42:40] um [00:42:41] Mitch williams roast just because [00:42:45] Everything that could have went wrong went wrong. Oh man. I got to rewatch the whole thing [00:42:49] I just watched the clip that you have on your youtube channel, which I haven't seen in years [00:42:53] And man they are going at it and both of them are slurring their words. Well, yeah [00:43:00] I'm I'm not affected so I don't I don't drink when I perform [00:43:04] But that night I started to drink him because I was running it and nothing was going right [00:43:10] And I remember I was probably about four beers in by the time the thing was uh over [00:43:16] Not to that drunk, but it's certainly not uh your optimum. Yeah, um, but [00:43:22] You know we had it was at the electric factory [00:43:26] It's a hard it's a very rough venue. It's a it's a dance concert venue. It's not an auditorium [00:43:31] Oh, I've performed there. Um, yeah if you perform there you probably open it for like a punk rock group or something [00:43:38] It was greg gerardo bill burr. Oh, okay [00:43:42] But but it was it was sad accordingly and it was it ended up being really nice actually [00:43:47] Well, yeah because they were coming for comedy [00:43:50] Which always helps. Yeah, what they were coming for here. That was uh [00:43:54] That was our or probably our second or third [00:43:58] Philly sports roast which wasn't a bad idea, but [00:44:04] It's in [00:44:05] We the fifth year we had a great year [00:44:08] After that we had eskin and catality and then we had pete rose and a week before that happened [00:44:13] It comes out that he was uh sending [00:44:16] He was screwing 14 year old girls that were being sent down the floor. So we had to cancel the whole thing [00:44:22] It was it was brutal. Anyway, uh that night with extra [00:44:26] He probably is the worst human i've ever had to deal with [00:44:30] He was demanding these, uh, you know extra hotel rooms in the afternoon that day at the last minute [00:44:37] You know, you don't show if I don't show up man. You don't have a fucking show, you know that you got nothing [00:44:44] You know, you don't even have a fucking event man. I was like [00:44:49] Whatever it was horrible. It's horrible. Yeah, is he's is he clean again or is he still [00:44:56] If he's alive, he's a mess. He's alive. I know that I wouldn't um [00:45:02] I don't see any redeeming value and he he's the worst person. I think I know [00:45:08] But I don't I don't really know but [00:45:11] Worst person i've ever dealt with wow [00:45:14] Just filthy horrible [00:45:16] I mean read a little bit about Lenny. Oh, I I absolutely have [00:45:20] Um, so as a Phillies as a Philly sports fan, what um, what's your favorite team in philly sports history? Any sport any year? [00:45:29] What team what era brought you the most joy as a fan? [00:45:33] God I have to say [00:45:35] Well, my the old Phillies from 80 was when I became you know [00:45:40] That's when I grew into being a fan the 80 championship was the best [00:45:46] because um [00:45:47] You know, I and the when they won the world series. I I wrote up broads tree [00:45:52] I jumped on an ambial on top of an ambulance [00:45:55] I got my way all the way back to olin without without driving [00:45:59] Uh, just hopping on cars and stuff [00:46:02] So cool [00:46:03] That was my team, you know [00:46:05] And um, I have to say other than that. I love the the buddy ryan teams [00:46:11] With with that ferocious defense with those two safeties west hopkins and andre wooders [00:46:16] I mean how are you gonna beat that? I mean nobody hit like that [00:46:20] and you know [00:46:21] You know the the linebackers they were just that defense was just unbelievable [00:46:26] Awesome, um, I it's hard for me to answer but I think because baseball was life when I was a kid the 93 phillies are probably my uh [00:46:35] Like just embodies like when you're a 10 11 year old boy baseball is everything [00:46:41] Oh and and the dude, um should have got MVP. It would have gotten MVP if the phillies won [00:46:46] I mean he was a monster. That's what that was part of what mitch and lennie are going back and forth with [00:46:51] Yeah [00:46:52] And you gotta go to the bat rack, man [00:46:54] This is you get up the bullpast people run for the bat rack [00:46:59] Yeah, he um [00:47:01] But that year I agree that that I don't know how they lost that so well [00:47:05] I know now [00:47:06] Oh, I do too. So I there's a uh, you know helium comedy club here in philly [00:47:10] There is a helium in buffalo and I have a friend that lives up that way [00:47:14] Who's a huge blue jays fan and a few months ago? [00:47:17] I was at I was at that helium and it's behind me. I you can't see it [00:47:20] but [00:47:20] He is a huge baseball fan and he goes hey, man [00:47:22] I got something for you and then he gave me a [00:47:25] autographed joe carter picture from 1993 of joe with his hands in the air rounding the bases and [00:47:32] One I was like you and then till I was like that is a great gift [00:47:40] Um, all right, I'm gonna let you go here one second. I do have one more question for you [00:47:43] I love talking to my friends talking shot. My friends are all hilarious and I love [00:47:48] Talking stand up and getting to the nitty gritty of it all, but I would love to hear [00:47:53] A story of a hell gig. Do you have any gig in the back of mine? [00:47:57] I just gave you two. Oh, I didn't I mean I'm talking about you performing you doing stand-up where it did not go well [00:48:04] Well, uh, the leon red bomb was the worst with the gary hyde nick material. That's that's my worst [00:48:09] You do [00:48:10] Um, I'll give you there's so many of course. We all we all have numerous gigs where here are like holy wow [00:48:18] get a job at [00:48:20] Prospectors up on route 38 in mount larry. Do you ever hear that place? It's in jersey [00:48:26] Um, anyway, I don't even know if it's still there. It might be that it's a country [00:48:31] and western bar [00:48:33] And um, it's a big place. It's a big restaurant complex [00:48:38] They have a lot of country dancing there [00:48:41] Well, one time they had the comedy night. I don't know if they they've had it ever since and that's the worst thing about comedy [00:48:47] Is people think you can throw it up anywhere that uh people think anywhere anytime [00:48:53] This doesn't work. So the seating was bad. There was it. Of course, there's a big noisy bar right next [00:49:01] I don't even know if we were in the bar adjacent to the bar not far from the bar [00:49:06] audience was [00:49:08] Kind of noisy was it was a bad setting [00:49:11] Somehow I don't even know what else was going on, but I just remember I had a heckler and some people like hecklers [00:49:18] I don't like them. They just throw you off. It's just not [00:49:21] It's not good. It's not fun for the crowd. It's not fun for the paying crowd [00:49:26] Unless you have like a [00:49:28] A heckling place there people are used to it and it's almost like sport there [00:49:33] Now I've known a few clubs where that that is the case [00:49:37] Betty's fireside up in north jersey was one like that [00:49:41] Where it was part of the crowd and it was a sport and you had to if you walked into that blind [00:49:46] You would get eaten alive, but you had to realize that you're going to have people cheering on other hecklers and shit [00:49:51] So that was that was a rough gig too [00:49:54] One of my many but just get back to the players. You got to have [00:50:06] Have [00:50:07] support from the club [00:50:09] To take care of this guy [00:50:11] Shut him up somehow because you can't walk off stage and literally [00:50:15] Carry somebody out or tell somebody to leave man handle them into place. I mean you need you need [00:50:22] somebody from [00:50:24] The restaurant to say dude, you got to shut up or you got to leave, you know [00:50:29] That wasn't the case and this guy just [00:50:32] uh, you know just [00:50:34] Ruined it for people next door. So yeah, I eventually lost [00:50:37] The crowd and it was just horrible, but I you know, I don't drive piss that put out remember that [00:50:44] Oh, there are places around delco where I have [00:50:48] Not even have like [00:50:49] Not even remember like childhood memories that i'm not fond of but like bad shows like oh man [00:50:55] I may have got beat up on that playground, but I ate shit at that bar and that's things more [00:51:00] I [00:51:02] Yeah, for sure. All right, joe plug all your social media here where where can everybody find you? [00:51:07] Uh, joe conklin.com. I have um [00:51:11] A bunch of shows coming up work with an orchestra now [00:51:13] We got the orchestra show at westchester university end of january. It's a um [00:51:19] It's kind of like my act put to music. It's a it's a salute to the philly sports fan [00:51:24] Uh, we're doing it again in february at the pit a broadway theater in pitman new jersey [00:51:29] Okay, and we got um a couple of regular stand-up shows at a catholic school near you [00:51:37] St. danison havertown and then holy rosary up in plymith [00:51:41] Okay, and I saw st. Anastasia too is on your calendar [00:51:44] That is two seconds from pex and hollow that is all my childhood territory [00:51:50] Never never leaves delco alone not at all. All right, joe. Thank you so much for being here [00:51:55] Man is great to talk shop and get your backstory. I hope we uh work together at some point in 2024 here [00:52:01] All right, pat. 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Automatically transcribed (themesh.tv) — expect the odd mistake, especially with names.